Craig didn't understand it. He did everything to make Tweek know he liked him but nothing worked. He pulled the blonde's hair, called him names, he even pushed him down but still nothing! The eight year-old was confused beyond belief. Everyone knew that if you bothered someone, you like them; it was like a playground commandment for Christ's sake.
But instead Craig was sent to the office, a concerned teacher calling his parents to report what the boy was doing. "Now, Mr. and Mrs. Tucker, the problem is that Craig has been caught bullying another student for quite some time now." Principal Victoria explained.
"Craig!" his mother scolded, stepping forward. "Why on earth would you do something like that?"
"Because, Tweek won't notice me!" Craig shot back, flipping off the adults.
Principal Victoria froze and stared at Craig with wide eyes as his dad and mom began to smirk knowingly. "Tweek, huh?" his dad teased. "She sounds pretty."
"No, no!" Principal Victoria tried to interrupt "You don't understand Tweek is a-"
"Very lucky girl!" his mother gushed, hugging Craig tightly "To capture my baby boy's heart."
Before the principal could try to speak again, his parents were dragging him out, sharing stories of their own love problems. Craig remained silent. If letting his parents think Tweek was a girl would get him out of trouble then he wouldn't complain.
"You see son," his dad lectured. "You'd probably find out when you're older but if you know now you'll have a head start against all those other boys who want Tweek's attention. Girls do not like to be bullied, if you want her to like you all you have to do is walk up to her, say "I like you!" and take her hand, then, for good measure, give her a little kiss."
Craig absorbed what his dad was saying half-heartedly, still slightly angry at the thought that someone else would like His Tweek. "All right, Dad." He agreed. He would try anything to get Tweek to notice him.
The next day, Craig was dropped off at school, walking quickly towards the playground as he scanned the area for Tweek.
There.
Next to Clyde and Token.
Craig walked over and his friends gave him weary looks. He ignored them, staring calmly at Tweek. The blonde twitched and shivered under his gaze but held his ground. Craig had to give it to him, Tweek was tough. He always fought back. To the waiting crowd's surprise, Craig leaned forward and planted a kiss on Tweek's lips, pressing hard before breaking away; taking the other boy's gloved hand tightly. "You're mine now." He stated calmly, flipping everyone else off.
Tweek blushed furiously and gave a soft twitch before speaking. "Okay." He agreed. And with that, the two boys turned and walked into the school, holding hands. Craig smiled to himself and nodded to a surprised Chef and Mr. Mackey, nonchalantly flipping them off. Remind him to thank Principal Victoria later…
