Where Are You Love?

Why can't I find you?

By: SamiJane

Genre: Drama/Humor

Disclaimer: See Author's Bio

Summary: After the Leyton wedding, Brooke Davis and Julian Baker try to figure out what's next in their own lives. Brooke/Julian, Brucas, Peyton/Julian, Leyton

A/N: So, I'm starting a new story, despite the fact that I'm still working on another one. But I had to start this one because I couldn't get it out of my head. It's written in a different way than my other stories are.

It'll be a comedy about love with Brooke and Julian in the main character seats. Basically them trying to find true love since Leyton and Naley seem to have already found it. I'm still working on whether or not I want Brulian to be end game.

So read and enjoy the ride. :)


Chapter 1: Regrets are for the Weak


Brooke's POV; the altar

As I listen to the one and only Lucas Scott, master of words, recite his heartfelt vows – consisting of words such as fate, soul mates, and true love always - I can't help but want to gag. Surprised? Believe me, I, Brook Davis, did not expect to feel my eyes roll as I hear his eloquent, meticulously thought out speech resound from his voice. I mean, he's Lucas Scott. Everyone fell in love with his words and gracefully constructed sentences. He has a New York Times Bestseller to prove it. Said bookseller even morphed into a full length, knock your socks off, motion picture.

And yet, all I can think is, "Damn guy better mean it this time."

In a one of a kind Brooke Davis original, I force myself from uttering an exasperated "Oh God, please shut up," with the fakest of all smiles plastered on my face. Only no one can tell it is fake. At least that part of cheerleading paid off. Hell, I am seriously thinking of running out of the goddamn church right now. But I can't do that. One, because I decided to wear my ridiculously tall five inch heels. And two, I have to support "two of my best friends in the whole world."

Why I want to gag – well there is a boat load of reasons. One is because his romantically crafted vows remind me of his infamous speeches and declarations of "love" back in senior year of high school. Another is probably because I shouldn't have eaten the left over Chinese from two nights ago.

But the main reason why I don't want to hear another sentence about Lucas' love for the woman of his dreams…well, that one reason has always shown its ugly face the past six years. It's the fact that I had allowed myself to become so invested in this Southern gentleman back in high school, that nearly every boy/ man that came after him had to live up to the standards he set. You know, minus the whole cheating thing.

But of course, in hindsight, he was really cheating on Peyton with me. After all, no matter how much I hated to admit it back in high school, the two had belonged to each other since she nearly ran him over that fateful night. If I had known that stupid fact, I never would have seduced the boy with a leopard bra and a pair of mittens in the first place.

But I can't regret what I felt during the brief time that I loved him or was in love with him. No matter how much the breakup (both of them) pained me afterwards, I will never regret our crazy relationship. For a brief, and I mean really brief, moment, the love that we felt for each other was so wonderful and pure - I would never give that back. Because even though it wasn't a Naley "always and forever" kind of epic, romance love, it had potential to be.

And now, I'm behind Lucas Scott, again. But, this time with tad more clothes on, and this time I'm supporting his choice in another woman. But she is not just any woman; she is my best friend, his "love of his life," our Peyton Sawyer.

I'm a best friend alright. I can't even get through this damn wedding without thinking of my tumultuous past with the groom.

Everyone knows that nobody loves weddings more than I do, but right now I can't wait till this "momentous occasion" is over. Am I happy for my friends? Of course I am. But this moment had been such a long time coming, that the surprise and awe of this marriage had passed as soon as I saw the engagement ring. I mean, the damn thing was supposed to happen five years ago.

I probably sound like a jealous idiot right now. But it's not because I want Lucas Scott. I certainly do not want Lucas romantically anymore. It has been six years. I'm not going to depreciate and disrespect myself by yearning for a man that never really fought for me, a man that doesn't want me. I deserve way better than that. I'm Brooke Davis.

No, Lucas Scott is not the reason why I can't wait to get off this altar and run to the reception hall for at least three glasses of champagne. Him and Peyton finally tying the knot is not what I am jealous of.

I'm jealous of all the love all of my best friends have found. And this wedding is only another reminder of it all. They've found a love so great and so awe inspiring – a love I have been longing for since I was nine and created a wedding for my Malibu Barbie and Ken dolls. At such a young age in life, Haley, Nathan, Peyton, and Lucas have found the kind of love one could only hope for, if only for one minute, in one lifetime.

The love you read about in love stories, like the Notebook or Gone with the Wind. Haley is the Allie to Nathan's Noah. Peyton is the Scarlett O'Hara to Lucas' Rhett Butler. Ok, maybe that last metaphor is a stretch, considering Peyton is nothing like Scarlett, but you get the point.

"I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may now kiss the bride," I hear the minister exclaim as the crowd cheers, whistles, and claps.

Damn, I can't believe I missed the rest of the wedding. Well, at least now the gagging sensation has passed.

I know love will come to me eventually and unexpectedly. But why can't that time be now?


Julian's POV; Outside the church, across the street

I sit covertly in my car, away from the crowd, but close enough to see the exuberant newlyweds run out of the church amidst their jovial friends and family. Even though I've known for months that this day was going to occur, melancholy still creeps up on me and my eyes began to redden and well up. But I refuse to shed one tear. I refuse to think, "I wish that was me holding her." No, Julian Baker does not have regrets. The past is the past. I made my decision years ago.

But she still takes my breath away. Even on the arm of another man.

Would this day still have happened if I never walked away? Maybe. Maybe not. That depends on what Peyton would have done if I had asked her to marry me instead of move in together. But I don't think I would have been able to vow in front of family and friends to love her forever. Not when I knew I only played second fiddle to the first love of her life. I knew he was still in her heart since our first date; I just believed she would eventually let go once she found someone else to love. And for a little while, I deluded myself to believe that she had let go. And then I found the book…again.

Peyton and I may have been in love. But it wasn't true love always. It wasn't the love you carved on trees, signifying forever. If it was always, she would have never gone back to him. She would have run after me instead of running back to Tree Hill.

Everyday since we broke up, I've wanted to kick myself for not reading the damn book after the first time I met her. Then I would have steered clear of the emo fairytale of Lucas Scott and Peyton Sawyer. But then I wouldn't have experienced love. It wasn't true love, but it was love. And I would never give that away. No matter how un-manly and pathetic I sound. Being in love with Peyton Sawyer will always be a cherished time in my life – no matter how much it hurt.

That's the real reason why I had decided to turn his novel into a movie. I wanted the world to be introduced to and to possibly fall in love with the woman that took my breath away.

"What are you doing here, producer boy?" a familiar raspy voice calls me out of my deep thoughts. Speaking of taking my breath away, I was so deep in thought that the voice of Brooke Davis nearly scares me shitless.

"Isn't it obvious?" I mutter without looking at her. She stands directly in front of my window; but I merely stared through the sliver of glass that her narrow waist failed to cover. The new Scotts are gone now; only a few straggling friends are left, including the brunette fashionista that is now heaving a deep sigh.

"It's over, Julian. Go home," she whispers with a hint of empathy. I read the book a lot more times than I would have liked to – her "Go home" statement really meant, "Don't make the same mistakes and investments in love that I did."

Well, it is a little too late for that. I am still here in Tree Hill, aren't I?

I remain silent, stoic, and frozen; my face staring ahead at the parade of cars on their way to the reception. I want her to leave and let me be. But of course, she can't risk me ruining her best friends' day for her. With one swift motion, she whips out her iPhone, utters a mere two words, and bends down to my eye level.

She doesn't say a word. She just stares. I must admit, the girl can be quite scary. Now I know how Peyton must have felt whenever she got on Brooke's bad side.

Within minutes a tow truck, very similar to the one described in his lovely novel, parks right behind my Mercedes.

"That is Marcus. He's going to follow you and make sure you go home ok. Wherever home is," Brooke states sternly, a hint of threatening in her voice. Where is the blackmail, though? "If you don't turn your engine on within the next sixty seconds, he's really going to make sure you get home ok. Got it, buster?" Ah there it is.

"He's not going to tow anything with me still in the car," I attempt to debate. I hope that the denizens of Tree Hill were a lot more law abiding than Scott and Davis clans.

"You have forty seconds," her stern voice and raised eyebrow reinforce her threat. And with that, she stands up and briskly walks away from the so called scene that was sure to be blamed on me.

And for a second, as I watch Miss Davis walk away, my male piggish tendencies kick in and I can't help but notice how amazing her ass looks in that dress. But the one second was fleeting because, of course, my heart reminds me that the shade of dress Brooke was wearing was the same shade of dress Peyton had worn on our fifth date.

What am I still doing here? She's never going to come back to me. And as I finally relinquish a tear to stray down my cheek and onto my steering wheel, I decide to drive off to the airport. I'm leaving and never coming back.


Brooke's POV; the reception

My eyes scan the room quickly while the vibration in my purse continues on. I calculate that I only have a mere two minutes before anybody notices that the maid of honor is not making rounds or tending to the bride.

"I think he's leaving Tree Hill. He's heading to the airport," I hear Marcus inform me as I make a quick dash for the ladies room. My mouth is left agape; no sound escaping.

"Huh?" is all I can muster. That takes me aback more than my unexpected gagging reflex during the ceremony.

"That's good right?" Marcus asks a bit puzzled.

"Um, yeah. Thanks," I answer. The call disconnects and my ninety seconds away from the reception are up. But I don't move. Like Julian was earlier, I remain frozen in my stance. A bit shocked, a bit relieved, but mostly puzzled. Thoughts and questions swirl in my mind.

Is he leaving because of the wedding? Lucas' movie isn't done shooting in North Carolina yet. What's going to happen to the movie? Is he finalizing things in LA so that he could move permanently to Tree Hill? Was he planning to ruin Peyton's life? Or Lucas' life? Was it something I said? Damn it, maybe I should have kept my mouth shut. At least then he would still be in Tree Hill and Marcus could still keep an eye on him for me.

Yes, I get paranoid. But it's only because I care about Peyton and Lucas. Julian can not ruin this day for them. To say I am a bit perplexed is an understatement.

"Aunt Brooke," a jubilant yet tiny voice called out to me, "Peyton is looking for you!" Six year old Lily Scott bounces inside and brings me out of my confused bewilderment. Shaking my head, I decide that Julian and his actions are nothing to worry over.

He is supposed to be the Brooke Davis of the present day, right? There's no way he will try to sabotage Peyton's happiness. But then I realize Julian isn't Brooke Davis. I don't know who Julian is. Like him with me, I only know the stories about him. And you know what they say about books and their covers.

With another smile placed strategically on my face, I lift Karen's adorable daughter in my arms and we both head back to the party. The party doesn't have to find out about the departure of Julian just yet. At least not till I find him first. If he is hurting as much as I was six years ago…well, even though I didn't initially like the guy, he didn't deserve what he is going through.


A/N: So what do you guys think so far? Good? Bad? Intrigued? Bored? Team Brulian? Team Brucas? Team Leyton? Team Pulian?