The plot bunny didn't leave it's nest... I had to write another version.


All of Hogwart's staff was attending a meeting. Dolores Umbrige had been speaking for what felt like hours when the headmaster turned toward his deputy and whispered:

"Would you hex me if I grabbed you and kissed you hard and long?"

"Now? Why would you do that?"

"I guess it's the best way to kill a toad!"

"You realise of course that everyone will think we're in a relationship?"

"Would it be bad?"

"You realise as well that we're not?"

"Yes… I'm sorry"

The headmaster's smiled felt down as he turned his attention back to the meeting.

"hem hem"

The DADA teacher looked the heads.

"What do you think about it, Minerva?"

The head of Gryffondor frowned.

"I'm sorry, I let my mind wander. What is it all about?"

"Don't you think your Gryffondor are a bit too much to handle for someone your age?"

Minerva's lips nearly disappeared.

"No, I don't."

The undersecretary had a chuckle then moved on in her agenda.

"Albus. Kiss. Me. Now."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive."

The smile made reappearance as he took her arm. Next thing she knew, she was on his laps and they were kissing.

"What the hell?" Madam Hooch shouted.

Professor Umbrige was as good as stunned. The others looked anywhere but the couple.

"I knew it! I have to tell Cornelius right away! That's ground for dismissal!"

"Oh let them be! Obliviate!"

Everyone watched the divination teacher with surprise. Everyone, that is beside the couple who was still kissing fiercely.

"They both helped me when she tried to throw me away."

Filius summarised what the others were thinking

"We didn't know you could do magic."

Dolores stirring prevented anyone to answer.

"We better take her elsewhere. He doesn't seem ready to let her go anytime soon." Pomona stated.

"I'll bring her to the hospital wing." Poppy sighed.

All of them left the room.

"You better have a good explanation for this, Mina dear." Septima said as she passed the headmaster and his deputy.

Once the door closed they pulled apart. She didn't bother to get up and smiled.

"I must confess you were right, we nearly killed her. It was worth it"

"It was worth what?"

"Well, we now have a whole staff thinking we're an item."

"They already thought so."

"True."

They smiled at each other.

"By the way you're an amazing kisser, my dear."

She blushed.

"I'm sure I could get even better with a little practice."

"I don't se the point." He said.

"Care to help me?"

"I'd be delight to".

And he didn't let her go anytime soon indeed.