Feather Light
It's quiet. Too quiet.
Only three days since Henry drove off on his motorcycle through a portal to "find himself" and Regina was already losing her mind.
It was worse than the nights he'd spent at Emma's or the Charmings' at least she knew when he'd be coming home. Now she wasn't sure how long it would be until she would see him again. Her little boy was all grown up and it wasn't sitting well with her at all.
She really needed a hobby. Or…a distraction…
She had been in the dining room folding laundry after work when she decided she could use a cup of tea to calm the thoughts swirling around in her head. Once her eyes landed on an old drawing of Henry's on the refrigerator from when he was little, she froze. Now she was sitting alone at the island still dressed in her black pantsuit and blouse. That damned drawing was doing nothing but making her feel even worse. It was just her and Henry in his picture, made when he was about five or six. They were drawn with her apple tree outside, with a bright yellow sun over them. The paper was fading now but she'd never taken it down, and she never would.
Her stomach was in knots, her thoughts churning wondering where her son had ended up. Which realm or world...if he was okay. What if time moved differently where he was and he lived his whole life without her? She'd surely never see him again. She'd miss out on everything – his dreams, his love, his family.
The sudden shrill of her cell phone startled her out of her thoughts and she jumped, retrieving it from her pocket. Seeing her sister's number calling her caused her to frown, wondering what Zelena wanted. On first impulse she muted the call, laying her phone face down on the island counter. She just wasn't in the mood to deal with her sister right now.
The phone went off again, buzzing across the counter. She stared at the rectangular object in front of her, unable to look away. It stopped for a moment before going off again. Rolling her eyes, she snatched the phone up and answered it. "Zelena, I'm really kinda bu--"
"Auntie Gina?"
Regina tensed, inhaling sharply as she instantly recognized the voice on the other line. "Hi, sweetie. Is everything okay, Robyn?"
What she got in reply was a slew of mumbles, muffled by crying.
"Whoa, honey. Slow down. Take deep breaths." Regina could hear Robyn panting on the other end. Regina switched the phone to her other ear, straightening her back. "Okay, now what's wrong?"
Her niece continued to cry softly. "Mommy won't let me go to Tessa's slumber party! Everyone is going to be there!"
"Oh, I see." Regina rubbed her temples, closing her eyes. "Did she tell you why?"
"No. She just said no and sent me up to my room!"
"Ah…" Regina nodded, sighing. She knew just how stubborn her sister could be.
"I have to go, Gina." Robyn sobbed. "Everyone is going. I'll be the only one not there!"
"I know, but if your mother said no there's really nothing I can do." Regina got up from the stool, shuffling out of the kitchen back into the dining room to go back to her folding. She cradled the phone between her ear and shoulder, picking up one of Henry's (now) clean shirts from the piles of dirty clothes he'd left behind.
"You can talk to her!"
Regina shook her head, sighing as she set the folded shirt down. "Honey, I highly doubt she'll listen to me."
It had been a point of contention between the Mills sisters over the years since Robyn's birth. Zelena was too overprotective of her daughter, too smothering. She was holding on to Robyn too tightly and Regina knew it wouldn't be long before her niece completely pushed her mother away. Regina and Zelena had fought about it many times over the years and actually didn't speak for months at a time. Regina had lived that life growing up – under a mother who tried to control her. While Zelena had far better intentions for her daughter than their mother had for either of them it didn't make it any better. Regina herself had wrongfully held too tight a reign on Henry when he was younger too. She knew now it had been wrong, but she'd been blinded by her quest for revenge against Snow White.
Truthfully she'd rather not deal with her sister at all and sometimes she even thought about cutting Zelena out of her life again. She would never do that to her niece though. She'd vowed to both that little girl and her father that she would always protect her before she was even born. Oh, Robin… It was moments like these she missed him the most, that now-familiar ache settling in her chest. If he could only see how brilliant and kind and beautiful his daughter was growing up to be, she knew he'd be more than proud.
It was because of her Robin that she would never stop fighting for her niece. Robin couldn't be there for his daughter or stand up for her and Regina knew he would have been the best father to her. She had decided then from the moment he was struck by that crystal in front of her that she'd always be there for both of his children. She'd failed with Roland when the Merry Men took him back to the Enchanted Forest – hadn't seen him since in fact – but she'd never let little Robyn out of her sight.
"But I'll be missing all the fun!" Robyn whimpered.
"I know, honey. I'm sorry." Regina assured her, picking up another of Henry's shirts to fold.
"Ugh! I hate mommy!"
Regina winced, shaking her head and letting the shirt in her hands drop to the tabletop. "Now, Robyn. You know that's not true. Your mother can be…" She paused, thinking how much a pain Zelena was. That wasn't what her niece needed to hear though. "…She's a little too protective yes, but it's because she's trying to keep you safe."
Robyn grunted. "What's so unsafe about a kids sleepover!"
Regina shrugged, sitting down on the chair she been standing next to with her elbows on the table. "Well… nothing. But that's just your mother. She's a little overdramatic – always has been. But she loves you, honey. She loves you so much and she's just trying her best."
"Well her best sucks!" Robyn spits out.
Regina's eyes glazed over, thinking of Henry's drawing on the refrigerator again. There was another one beside it, drawn by Robyn a few years earlier. She could see both clearly in her mind. "What if I come to get you? Sleepover at Auntie Gina's instead? Might not be as fun but, I just bought a whole tub of ice cream. And there's fresh hot cocoa powder. It'll at least give you and your mom some time apart to cool off."
"But… mommy will just say no. I know she will." Robyn argued.
"You just let Auntie Gina handle your mommy. All I want you to worry about right now is packing up an overnight bag." Regina stood, fumbling around the dining room for her keys.
Robyn was quiet for a few minutes before she sniffled. "Really?"
Regina snatched her coat off the rack by the front door and slipped on her heels. "Really, honey. Go get ready. I'll be there soon. You best give your mom her phone back to before she gets angry."
"Okay, Gina. If she'd just let me have my own…" Robyn sighed heavily and the line went dead.
Regina put on her red suit coat, grabbed her purse, and pocketed her phone, heading out the door and straight for her car. The drive to Zelena's where she now lived in the Charming's old loft was quiet. Thoughts buzzed around her head, trying to figure out how she was going to pull this one off. The Mills women were a stubborn bunch – Zelena especially.
The latest thing the sisters were fighting about was the inevitability of Robyn showing signs of her own magic. Zelena wanted to suppress her daughter's magic, didn't think it was safe, and wanted to prevent the young girl from going evil like the rest of the women in her family. Regina wanted to teach Robyn to use her magic the right way – not like she had from their mother and Rumplestiltskin. She also knew that her niece's father wouldn't want her to be held back from who she truly was, even if he hadn't always liked magic. Regina had tried to talk to Zelena about it but her elder sister wouldn't listen, insisting she didn't need any help parenting her own daughter. And so Regina had refused to do the spell to bind Robyn's magic and she knew Zelena would never go to Rumple or the Savior for this.
Hence why the sisters were at odds.
Like a drone on autopilot, she made the usual left onto Main Street, a mistake she instantly regret as the neon-lit Granny's diner sign came into view. Burgers with Henry. That's the memory she's hit with and a fist wrapping itself around her heart and squeezing would have been less painful.
They had met there a week ago (though you could convince Regina it had been a year and she'd believed it. It felt like a lifetime since she'd seen his sweet face or heard the tenderness of his voice. God she missed him) to discuss his final decision between community college and NYU.
Had she known what she'd had been walking into when she'd sat down in their usual booth, she wouldn't have been so against the idea of him attending a college in a different state. She'd have rejoiced, praised it, packed his bags up herself and drove him there with a wide smile.
Instead, she'd been hit with a wrecking ball. One she was still struggling to recover from. Henry had other plans. Plans that caused them both to sit in silence, his hands wrapped around hers, soothing her with the gentle rub of his thumb, assuring her in soft tones that it was all going to be okay. She hadn't heard of word of it though, had just sat there, one hand stolen by Henry and the other laying on over her shattered heart. The glistening magic bean lay on the tabletop between them. She hated that bean, magic, in general, followed closely along with it. Despised both with a fierceness she hadn't allowed herself to feel in decades. She would forever be haunted by her training, knowing that magic had always come with a price. Penance she still felt she was paying for all the evil acts she'd committed. But it had stolen her son away from her far too many times already and she was convinced this time she wasn't going to be able to survive it.
Henry had chosen to go, had chosen to leave her behind in search for a new adventure. She knew in her heart it wasn't because of her but because of the incredible sense of wonder in him that Regina used to adore before it drilled a hole in the centre of her heart. He just wanted to find where he belonged in the world.
But it's the quiet echo in the back of her mind that taunts her, accuses her of failing her own son, neglecting to provide a place her son could call home, that has her swiping her hand across her cheek to wipe the few tears that escaped as she gripped tighter onto the steering wheel and she pulled over to park in front of the loft.
She closed her eyes for just a brief moment, a desperate fight against the burning of more unshed tears behind her lashes. She rested her head against the steering wheel and forced herself to breathe for a moment. A confrontation with her sister (because that's what it was going to be, she was sure of it) was not something to deal with on the verge of a meltdown.
After a backwards count from ten and a quick look at herself in the rearview mirror, she rubbed off the little blemish of mascara gone awry under her eyes and made her way upstairs.
She wasn't sure what she'd expected to hear once she'd reached the top steps to the apartment but the shouting match that seeped through the walls was a far cry from anything pleasant. She cringed, laying her hand flat on the door. If she could just get the two of them to get along, to see how alike they were. To see how much they really loved each other. She released a breath, closing her eyes and looking up at the ceiling. She wondered if Robin was watching her… She silently made a wish, asking him to help her comfort and support his daughter…
"Robyn Jade Mills, what are you doing with my phone? And why the bloody hell are you packing?"
"Leave me alone!" Robyn screamed.
Regina opened her eyes, lifting her hand off the door. It was time to stop thinking and get in there to save her niece from her sister's wrath. She knocked lightly on the door, waiting for a response. The door opened quickly, and she was face to face with an angry redhead.
"What are you doing here?" Zelena snarled.
Regina rested her hands on her hips, letting her purse hang on the inside of her elbow. She scowled, her nose up in the air. "I'm here, dear sister because my niece stole her mother's phone to call me because she was upset. She was crying, Zelena. What's going on?"
"We're fine – I can mother my child on my own. Certainly, don't need you butting in where you're not wanted." Zelena started pushing the door closed but Regina held up her hand, teleporting into the apartment. "Excuse you!"
"Damnit, Zelena! Robyn called me!" Regina shouted. She looked around for her niece, seeing the single child's shoe at the bottom of the loft stairs. The redhead turned her head away from her sister. "Don't you dare roll your eyes at me! I don't need to see you to know that. You may be Robyn's mother but she's my family too. And I won't let you smother her like our mother did to me. We both know where that path leads – something we've both worked too hard to overcome. Definitely, nothing her father would want for her either."
Zelena's turned to face her, eyes wide. "How dare you—"
"No, how dare you!" Regina cut her off, pointing her finger. "All you've ever wanted was someone to love you, but you seem damn well determined to push us all away." Zelena just stared at her, mouth hanging open. "You've had years with that precious little girl and you're ruining it. You just got to see her blow out her candles at her eighth birthday party – which you only invited me to because she begged you too, by the way. That's a lot more time than her father ever got to dream of having with her."
"Oh buzz off! I wasn't the one who—"
"Do I really have to remind you who it was?" Regina pursed her lips. Zelena's mouth snapped shut and she crossed her arms. "I've done nothing but support you since then. I've forgiven you, invited you into my home, helped you when you lost your magic. I've been nothing but here for you and you continue to shut me out."
"You know exactly why," Zelena muttered.
"And you know where I stand on that as well." Regina shot back – causing Zelena to roll her eyes. "Now… I think it's best if Robyn comes over to my house for the night. You're both upset, and some space will do you good. And don't object – you know it's for the best." Zelena didn't respond, just continued to pout. "It's one night. I'll bring her back tomorrow when we're all calm and we'll talk this through. I'll even have her call you tonight before bed if you wish. Just…let me take her. The house is too quiet anyway. I miss Henry. I could really use some time with my niece."
Her sister stared her down for a few moments before uncrossing her arms. "Fine, take her. Whatever."
"Really, Zelena? Enough with the attitude." Regina scoffed, shaking her head. She passed her sister, who turned away from her, and climbed the stairs to Robyn's room in the loft. She gently knocked on the side of the stairs, peeking her head over the top.
"Go away!" Came the muffled cry of response.
"Robyn, honey, it's your auntie Gina." She kept her voice soft, climbing up over the stairway into her niece's room. She left her purse on the floor near the stairs and made her way over to the bed. Robyn's face was buried in her pillow, still crying. Regina sat down beside her and lay her hand on the girl's back. "Oh, sweetie." She remembered many days in her own youth, crying into her pillow over something her mother either did or said.
Robyn bolted up and turned, wrapping her arms around her aunt's middle. She let out a small cry, her head leaning against her aunt's stomach. Regina held the girl tight, her chin resting on the crown of Robyn's blonde hair.
"It's alright, everything's okay." Regina cooed.
"You and mommy fight more than she fights with me." Robyn held her head back, looking up at her aunt with tearful eyes.
"You heard that, huh?" Robyn's shoulders dropped and Regina let out a breath. "Things between your mother and I are complicated – and nothing I want you to worry about." Robyn looked away, resting against her aunt again. "Okay, let's get your things for the night and we can head out. We should have plenty of time to do lots of fun things before bedtime. You can even help me cook. I know how much you enjoy that."
"Really?" Robyn raised her eyebrows, grinning.
"Really, really." Regina chuckled, nodding.
"Can we do magic to go to your house?" Robyn asked her.
Regina tensed, thinking of her sister downstairs who was probably listening to their conversation and didn't want her daughter anywhere near magic. "Actually, I brought my car. I thought we could go for a nice short drive."
"Cool!" Robyn hugged her again. Regina sighed in relief, thankful she'd dodged that bullet.
Ten minutes later, the two sped down the street in Regina's car. Zelena had been quiet as Regina helped Robyn gather her things, sulking in the corner with her arms crossed. Robyn did give her mother a hug and kiss goodbye and Regina watched with a silent smile on her face. It was in those kinds of small moments that Regina often saw traces of her Robin in the young girl. For even when at odds with the ones they loved, both father and daughter never failed to show their affection for their family. She even saw just the slightest trace of a smile on Zelena's face as they were leaving.
Robyn's tears faded quickly and she couldn't get to the car fast enough, pulling Regina down the stairs. Regina turned on the radio and together they sang along with Diana Ross in "Ain't No Mountain High Enough." Soon enough they turned into Mifflin Drive, waiting in the car at Robyn's insistence for Pat Benatar's "Hit Me With Your Best Shot" to be done before they went inside.
When the song was finished, though, Robyn flew inside before Regina could get out of the car. By the time Regina stepped inside, her niece was already running full speed up the stairs. One of Robyn's flats slipped off as she rounded the corner of the stairs, tumbling down to the first floor. Regina's breath hitched in the back of her throat and her feet were stuck to the floor. Her hand rose up to hover over her mouth. Her ears echoed with her own voice, yelling at Henry again to not leave his shoes laying around the house.
"Gina!"
Regina blinked, looking up to find Robyn leaning over the balcony watching her curiously while toeing both her stocking feet between the posts. Regina exhaled, letting her hand drop to her side. "Yes, sweetheart?"
"Can we have that taco lasagna for dinner? It's my favourite!" Robyn grinned down at her.
A soft smile curled on her lips and she chuckled. "Anything for my favourite niece," Regina answered her. Robyn cheered, jumping up and down. "If that is, you pick up your shoes and put them by the door where they belong. And please don't jump around near the balcony. We wouldn't want to ruin our sleepover fun with a trip to see Dr. Whale would we?"
"Bleh!" Robyn scrunched her nose. "He's weird."
"Indeed, he is." Regina agreed. Robyn stepped away from the balcony and down the hall upstairs out of Regina's sight. A few moments later her niece reappeared carrying one of her shoes, descending the stairs and picking up the other on her way down. Regina nodded in approval, crossing her arms as she watched Robyn carry the shoes to the mat near the front door and set them down beside Regina's heels she'd discarded on her way in. "That's better."
"Yeah, yeah…" Robyn sighed.
Regina just shook her head. "You are so much like your cousin Henry."
"Is Henry coming for dinner too?" Robyn's eyes lit up, always eager to see her cousin.
Regina's face fell, uncrossing her arms. "Sorry, sweetie…Henry's not here…"
"But…" Robyn faltered. "Oh…he left – I forgot. Sorry I made you sad, Aunt Gina…"
"It's okay, sweetie." Regina shook her head, wiping a tear out of her eye. She cleared her throat, "Why don't we start on dinner? Yeah? Taco lasagna huh?"
Regina helped Robyn get her things settled in her room and then they made their way to the kitchen, putting on their aprons and washing their hands. Robyn started washing the lettuce, tomatoes, black olives, and onions in the sink. Regina got the meat out and browning on the stove with onions and peppers. When everything was ready, they assembled the ingredients in a dish and Robyn even got to help put it in the oven. Once it was in the oven, they cleaned everything up.
"Okay kiddo, now that we've got dinner started, what should we do first?" Regina helped Robyn take off her little apron and the two of them went to the kitchen sink. Regina grabbed the little step stool from under the sink and Robyn stepped up on it.
"Um…" Robyn reached into the sink as Regina turned on the water and squirted some soap into both of their hands. "Can we play some board games? Or watch a movie?"
"We should have plenty of time for that and plenty more before bedtime." Regina nodded. They finished washing their hands and dried them off with the red towel she kept by the sink.
"Cool!" Robyn jumped down off the stool and Regina put it back in its place. "Hey, I can show you how much better I got at reading too?"
Regina grinned, bending over to bop her niece's nose. "I bet you're a real pro by now." Robyn giggled, wrapping her arms around her aunt's waist. Regina straightened, hugging the little girl back. "You know, I think I have some of Henry's old books upstairs in the attic….maybe we can look through them later. You can take some home with you if you want."
Robyn's eyes widened as she looked up at Regina. "Really?"
"Sure" Regina chuckled.
"You're the best, Auntie Gina." Robyn hugged her tighter, her head down.
Regina closed her eyes, releasing a breath. There was a time when Robyn was little - and her Robin was still alive - that Regina had thought a lot about adopting her niece as her own. She and Robin would raise his daughter together along with both of their sons and be one big happy family. But of course, her life was never the way she planned it. Still, she loved her niece more than she'd thought she could. Enough to continually put up with her difficult sister despite their never-ending differences. Zelena was getting better, redeeming her wicked ways, but she still had some internal growing to do. It was different being around a young female child as they grew up, different than raising Henry and even her time around Snow as a child. Robyn never failed to delight and entertain her, always eager to show her aunt the new things she'd found or learned or accomplished. Such a warm and giving child, much like her older brother Roland. "You'll always be my special little girl." She opened her eyes, resting her chin on the top of Robyn's head. "Now...where we do we start this crazy fun-filled night?"
"Chutes and ladders!" Robyn grinned.
"Chutes and ladders it is." Regina kissed the top of her head, nodding.
For the next hour or so, they played several other games as well including Trouble, Checkers, and Scrabble. Robyn, of course, won essentially every round. Regina hadn't tried to let her win but she wasn't concerned either. She enjoyed any time spent with her niece, regardless of the activity.
When Robyn grew restless with the games, they moved to the family room to curl up on the couch and watch a movie. While Robyn chose a movie, Regina went to the kitchen to make them some popcorn on the stove. She returned, bowl in hand, to find How To Train Your Dragon already in and waiting on the menu screen and Robyn wrapped up in a blanket on the couch. Regina settled down beside her niece, the young girl leaning against her side.
As they watched the movie, Regina felt a sense of calm go through her. Her heart which ached for her wayward son remembered the many nights spent with Henry when he was young on this very couch. It was their Saturday night fun-time together, the one night a week that she didn't work and Henry wasn't in school.
In all her thoughts, she could barely focus on the movie. She'd watched it enough with Henry though so she wasn't worried. She glanced over at Robyn and was relieved to find the girl completely enthralled with Hiccup and Toothless and their adventures on the screen.
It felt nice to continue the tradition with Robyn and she thought perhaps it could be a new one between the two of them. She wondered how Zelena would feel about letting them make this a weekly thing between aunt and niece. Perhaps when her sister cooled down, Regina would have to bring up the idea to her.
Soon enough the credits were rolling and Robyn insisted on a having an impromptu puppet show before dinner. They dug into Henry's old art supplies and acted out the story from the movie.
After dinner, they made Robyn's favourite brownie mint chocolate chip cookies. The girl did most of the steps in the recipe herself, with Regina watching over proudly closeby. Regina cleaned everything up while the cookies baked in the oven and Robyn skipped off upstairs to take a bath, insisting that she was old enough to take a bath herself.
Regina caught up on some work in her office while Robyn was upstairs, hoping to quell the lonely thoughts running around in her head. Every time she started to get into one report or another, however, her mind would always go back to the unfolded basket of Henry's laundry in the dining room. It didn't take long before she was back standing at the end of the table, holding Henry's grey and red striped scarf against her heart. He'd always loved it and insisted on wearing it, even when the weather was warm.
"Gina!"
Regina jumped as the scarf fell to the table, startled as a pair a little hands dug themselves into her sides from behind. She turned to find her niece in the midst of a giggling fit, pointing gleefully at her aunt's inflamed cheeks.
"Haha, I scared the Evil Queen!" Robyn continued to giggle, holding her hands around her stomach.
Regina chuckled, shaking her head. "My silly little girl, you think that's funny huh?" Robyn's laughter only grew. "I'll show you funny!" Regina stepped forward, throwing out her hands and pulling her niece forward. She held on to her tight, digging her fingers into her sides and Robyn's laughter turned to high pitched squeals of delight. "Ha! Silly...I got you! I got you! What're you going to do about it!"
"Aunt Regina!" Robyn giggled endlessly, squirming in her aunt's arms.
"Nope, not ever letting you go!" Regina held her close and the two of them sunk to the floor. A wicked grin flashed on Robyn's face and she reached down and around behind Regina's knee. Her hold on the girl loosened and Robyn jumped up to her feet.
"Ha! I got away!" Robyn danced around, laughing.
Regina smirked, coming to stand behind Robyn out of a purple cloud with a wave of her hand. Robyn craned her head back and up at her aunt who smiled down at her. "Not so fast, little one."
"Gina, that's cheating!" Robyn laughed. Regina shrugged, leaning down to kiss the top of her niece's head. "Someday you've definitely gotta teach me how to do that."
Regina bit the side of her lip. "We'll see, okay. For now, I think it's just about bedtime."
"Aww man!" Robyn scrunched her nose, turning around to face her aunt.
"It's been a long day and your mother will sic her monkeys on me if I keep you up too late." Regina raised an eyebrow. "But...how about you show off those fancy reading skills for a bit first?"
"Sweet!" Robyn cheered, jumping up and down again.
While her niece went through her bedtime routines, Regina finished the laundry on the table and cleaned up a little in the family room. By the time she made her way upstairs, Robyn was already in bed reading. Regina sat down on the bed beside her and Robyn read the whole second chapter of Matilda out loud. Regina told her she could read some more, but Robyn had a special request.
"Gina, can you tell me about my dad?"
Regina inhaled sharply, eyeing her young niece curiously on the bed beside her. She'd heard this question in her head for a long time, wondering when the day would come when she would hear it for real. She'd thought long and hard about what she would say but now… Somehow now that she was at this very moment and her Robin's little girl was staring up at her asking about her father, nothing felt right. How does one sum up the life of a man who gave everything for the ones he loved?
"You don't have to tell me, it's okay." Robyn turned her head away. "Mom hates it when I bring him up. All she ever said was that he was taken from the world when I was a baby."
Regina bit the inside of her cheek, swallowing down the tears. Her heart clenched and her stomach flipped.
"I've heard the kids at school say things...Mom told me not to listen to them." Robyn continued. "I may only be eight but I'm not stupid. Henry told me once that he was a hero and I should be proud to be his daughter."
"He's right." Regina's voice cracked. "Henry was very close to your father, he would know. He saved Henry's life many times."
Robyn watched her closely, narrowing her eyes. "You loved him, didn't you? You loved my daddy?"
"With everything I had." Regina breathed out, her hands shaking. "Your father was very special to me and losing him…it nearly crushed me." Robyn leaned her head over, resting it against her aunt's shoulder. Regina wrapped her arm around her, letting out a breath. "I remember the day you were born - he was so happy holding you in his arms. He loved you so much already, he would have given you the world. And he did. He gave us all a second chance to live."
"I wish I could have known him. He sounds so awesome. I don't know why Mom won't talk about him." Robyn shrugged. "She must have loved him too, right?"
Regina gulped, feeling a tension in the back of her skull. "It's, well...it's complicated. When you're older I'll explain it more but there are just some things…" She trailed off, searching for the right way to explain this to a child. "Some of what happened wasn't good, in fact, it hurt a lot of people actually. Some of it hurts deeper, in here. Some days I wake up and it feels like it's happening all over again." She lay her hand over her chest and Robyn frowned. "There are things, too, that I feel you don't ever need to know too. That you wouldn't want to know. I would never keep you from the truth nor would I hide anything from you but knowing some of the truth would only hurt and confuse you."
Robyn nodded. "Okay, Gina."
"That's the one thing your mom, dad, and I always agreed on - we all loved you and all of us just wanted to keep you safe." Regina smiled. "As much as your mom drives you crazy, she just wants what's best for you. Our mother wasn't a very good mother at all and Zelena just wants to be better, for you."
Robyn's eyes dropped and she turned away from her aunt. "I heard some kids at school talking about how mom's and your mom sent her away when she was born...that you didn't even grow up as sisters."
Regina raised an eyebrow, wondering where these children were hearing such things from. "I...I think that's a story for another night. And probably one your mom should tell more than me, okay kiddo?"
"Okay…" Robyn groaned, rolling her eyes. "Can you please just tell me one more thing about my daddy?"
"I suppose." Regina grinned. "This is something I've never told anyone - not even your mom or Henry." Robyn looked up at her with curious eyes. "After your dad died, I was really lost. I was ready to give him everything, to share the rest of our lives together with the three of you. Losing him...it felt like I lost a piece of myself and in some ways I did. I worried about him horribly - if he was okay, wherever he was."
"Do you still worry about him?" Robyn asked her.
"I don't as much anymore no." Regina shook her head. "I feel him a lot like he's watching over me. And I started finding these feathers everywhere when I needed him most, almost like he sent them to me to reassure me."
Robyn's eyes widened. "Really?"
Regina hugged her tighter. "I have a box of them in my room at home."
"He's never sent me one." Robyn started to tear up.
"Oh, sweetie." Regina tapped the underside of her niece's chin with her index finger. She gently tilted the young girl's head to look up at her, one of Robyn's tears falling down her cheek and onto Regina's finger. "He's watching over you too, I know he is. Your brother, Roland, too in the Enchanted Forest. And Henry...wherever he's off to. Your daddy's always there."
Robyn shook her head, still crying. "But how will I know?"
"Hmm…Maybe he's sent them to you but you didn't know to look for them so you didn't see them." Regina suggested, raising her hand to wipe the tears from her niece's eyes. "He'll always be in your heart, even if you can't feel it."
Robyn let out a yawn, leaning further into her aunt. "M'kay, Gina."
"Someone's getting sleepy…" Regina chuckled, lifting the young girl off her lap and onto the bed. Robyn yawned again, rubbing her eyes as she crawled under the covers. Regina rose from the bed, pulling the blanket up to cover her niece more. She leaned down to press a kiss to Robyn's forehead. Robyn held her arms up and Regina grinned, leaning down again as Robyn wrapped her arms around her aunt's neck.
"G'night auntie Gina…I love you!" Robyn whispered.
"Goodnight, sweetie. I love you too." Regina kissed the side of her cheek. Robyn closed her eyes and dropped her arms, curling up on her side. Regina sighed contently as she stood up, hearing the soft sound of her niece snoring already. She flipped off the lamp on the nightstand beside the bed, leaving the room dark safe for the small night light on the floor near the door. She tiptoed quietly away from the bed, stopping at the door and turning back to watch her niece for just a few more moments.
She remembered a night a long time ago, she'd stood in the doorway of this very room - though it had been the version of her house in the underworld. Robin, Henry, and herself set up the room to be a temporary makeshift nursery for the newest little Locksley until they get back up to their world. On a night his daughter was particularly fussy, Robin walked and rocked with her for hours on end. Regina woke up alone in the bed and wandered down the hall, finding herself transfixed in the doorway watching her soulmate soothe his child. When he finally got the newborn asleep, he'd looked up at Regina in the doorway with the widest, brightest smile on his face. Her heart had felt so light in that moment - like she was exactly where she belonged watching the love of her life comfort his child while hers was asleep down the hall.
Regina felt that lightness watching Robyn sleep in her bed as well. Robin was gone, Roland was worlds away, and Henry was off discovering himself and thinking of that alone hurt like hell… She stepped back a few steps and froze.
The air around her changed. She felt a slight pressure on the top of her shoulder even as her nose caught the briefest whiff of a scent. It smelled of pine trees, outside air, and earth… Forest. Her heart sped up, her eyes wide. She gasped silently, her hand on her chest. Could it be? A sense of calm took over her and she breathed out, leaning back into the warmth. She glanced over her shoulder, half-expecting to see something there. Her ear twitched, her dangling earring swirling with a non-existent breeze.
"Robin…" She breathed out, tears welling in her eyes. She looked over to her shoulder again, whimpering at the sight of the small, grey feather on her sweater near the base of her neck. She closed her eyes, remembering all the times Robin would kiss her there or whisper in her ear. With shaky hands, she picked up the feather and let it rest in the palm of her hand.
She glanced over at her niece still sound asleep and her tears slid down her cheeks. She blinked through the tears at the blurry sight of a shadow beside the bed. She could feel the shadow smile at her and then down at Robyn on the bed, though she didn't understand it herself. She blinked again, wiping the tears away, but the shadow was gone.
She looked down at the feather again, smiling brightly. The tears continued to drop from her lashes as she held her other hand over her heart.
"Love you, daddy…"
Regina's head popped up at the sound of Robyn talking in her sleep. To her surprise, the shadow had returned. It leaned over the bed near her niece and Regina still had that feeling it was smiling. She wasn't quite sure what she was seeing or how it was possible but somehow the shadow was glowing around the edges. In the soft light, Regina could see something float down from the shadow onto the pillow beside Robyn - another feather, similar to the one still in her hand. She winked to the shadow, blowing a kiss with the hand that wasn't closed around the feather. The shadow smiled back and looked down at Robyn one more time before it faded into the darkness.
Regina closed her eyes, still smiling - she knew one little girl who would be very happy in the morning. Perhaps a shopping trip was in order before she took Robyn home so her niece could pick out a keepsake box to start her own feather collection. With one last glance to her niece, Regina shuffled back down the hall.
The scent of forest lingered in the air, following her back to her room.
She wasn't sure how long it would be before she was with Henry again or if she'd ever see Roland. The ache of losing Robin would never fade, though she knew he was always near. Being near her niece would be a comfort, a welcome tie to her father, and a way for neither of them to ever be alone again - even with Robin always watching over them.
