A/N: Hello everyone! We want to represent our new work based on a cool otome-game "7'Scarlet". After playing it till the very end we've got that bitter-sweet feeling of sadness. We liked Hanate-onii-san's character so much that we just couldn't let him have such a tragic end. That's why we have written this story. The song "When I Kissed the Teacher" by ABBA helped a lot, giving us the main idea and inspiration. Yes, we are people who listen to the old music, haha,
Anyway, we hope you will enjoy this story. Please, tell us what you think by leaving your comment.
When I Kissed the Teacher
Ever since a new History teacher appeared in our University, I have lost my peace. The academic year started a week later after Hino-kun and I returned to Tokyo from our summer trip to Okunezato. I still can't understand myself, when we were leaving the small country town. I had a feeling in my chest that I was losing something precious, but couldn't grasp the meaning of what exactly it was.
In those tangled emotions I returned home. I've been living alone in my large apartment ever since I can remember myself. My parents are busy people, who work abroad, and we rarely see each other. The only communication I get from them is our short phone calls. But it's okay. I am used to this life style. Also I have Hino-kun, who likes to hang around. We are good, even best friends, but after the trip to Okunezato I've gotten this weird feeling like he wants us to be more than just friends. If to be honest, this idea sounds crazy and wild to me. I can't see him as someone more than he is to me now. It's ridiculous! Yet, I am afraid to hurt his feelings. Back in the country town he tried to show me his other side – a caring and loving one. It was nice to know that he thinks of me that high, but I am not okay with the fact that he might be in love with me. Maybe I am not ready, or maybe I am just scared of losing the friendship we used to have.
Our last day in Okunezato printed in my mind permanently. I still have this mourning feeling in my heart whenever I recall the burnt field in the mountains. I don't remember how I ended up in that place and why I was there with Hino-kun, but the pain of great loss is still fresh in my chest. And I have no clue, why I have this weird feeling and why I have tears in my eyes every time I remember that episode.
I didn't talk much to my best friend after our arrival. I am sure he is worried and blames himself for taking me there, but I just couldn't force myself to face him and talk about our little adventure. If to be honest, I can't even remember why he took me there. What was the reason of that trip to an old and far-away country town? The more I think about it, the more questions pop up in my mind.
So I decided to get a little distraction from everything regarding Okunezato and my tangled feelings by visiting the library in the University. When I was leaving the apartment, I heard a kind whisper that told me to have a nice day. Am I imagining things? I could swear that I heard a gentle male's voice. But there was no one in the room except me. I looked around to make sure that I was indeed alone, and of course I had a positive result. A small chuckle escaped my lips.
"Get a grip, Ichiko," I told myself and headed to the front door.
The weather was nice and I was proud of myself for making a decision of going to the library. After picking some useful textbooks that I might need during the first semester, I headed to the dean's office to look for the schedule. The new subjects we were going to study during the year were exciting. I was indeed looking forward to this academic year.
"Your faculty will have a new History teacher," the secretary told me, when I was examining the sheet of paper in my hands that had the schedule for the upcoming semester.
"Oh, really? It's nice to hear," I answered politely with a smile.
History wasn't my best subject. I loved learning interesting facts that happened in the world, but thanks for my terrible memory, I always had a hard time to get good marks for this subject. Well, let's just hope that the new teacher wouldn't be a monster like the previous one was.
And a week later I met him. Yes, it was a man. A young and very good-looking man, who stole my peace. He introduced himself as Hanate Yatsukami and when he told us his name my eyes filled with tears.
I still can't understand why I reacted the way I did, when I heard his name. Hino-kun noticed my state and asked the new teacher for permission to walk me to the medic cabinet. I was grateful to him for taking care of me that day. The weird emptiness in my heart started to hurt again just like it did on the last day in Okunezato. I looked like a total mess in Hino-kun's eyes, I guess. But I am very grateful to him even now. His strong shoulder was everything I needed that day to cry my heart out. He is the best friend in the world and I feel sorry for not having the love towards him like he wants me to.
Sorry, Hino-kun.
That day I didn't return to History class, neither did my friend. The doctor in the medic cabinet advised me to go home and have a good rest to calm down. I agreed.
After crying out my sudden choking solitude into a pillow I felt better and could attend classes the next day.
I met the new teacher in the large University corridors several times and it always ended up with me freezing to the spot and averting my eyes from him. Why was I acting all vulnerable and shy around him all of a sudden? I don't have an answer to that question even now. But on our third accidental encounter in the corridor I thought I would lose my mind. Yatsukami-sensei walked up to me with his usual light smile on his handsome face and stopped right in front of me. He looked into my face for a brief moment before sitting on his haunches to pick up a paper that I must have dropped without noticing.
"It's yours, I assume, Hanamaki-san," he uttered politely handing me a piece of paper that was indeed mine.
All the words stuck in my throat as I silently took my essay from his hands.
"I hope you are feeling better and will be able to attend my next lecture on Thursday," he continued with a brief smile, looking right into my eyes.
He was so handsome and manly. And I didn't know where to look to avoid his gaze, that played the strings of my heart.
"Sorry for the last time, sensei. I will be at your lecture, I promise," I told him, averting my eyes by hiding them behind my bangs. I didn't even notice how hard I was pressing the folder to my chest in agitation.
"I will be waiting for you. Have a nice day."
With those words he walked his way, leaving me all perplexed and shocked. His last words sounded familiar and the way he pronounced them echoed in my distant memory with a blunt pain. I turned around to look at his retreating figure, when I caught a trace of his scent. His unique scent of something sweet and fresh. It was a smell of a flower I didn't know the name of. But all my being was shouting inside me that it was something dear and special to me.
My next thought was the craziest I had ever had in my life. I wanted to chase and hug my new History teacher and breathe in his scent again.
I shut my eyes tightly until it was painful to keep them closed. What was wrong with me?
"Ichiko? Are you spacing out again?" Hino-kun's cheerful voice brought me back to my senses.
Oh, yes. I was still standing in the middle of a giant corridor. No wonder people thought of me as of some air-head.
Thank you, Hino-kun. You are always there for me.
And finally the day has come. I took my seat at the front row and prepared everything for the lecture. Several minutes later the History teacher entered the auditorium and stood at his desk.
This time I am sure that he looked at me longer than it was necessary for a teacher to confirm their student's presence.
He is still looking at me! And the most terrible thing here is that I can't avert my eyes from him.
I feel my face getting hot under his attentive gaze. But to my great shock, I understand that I don't want him to stop looking at me. For some unknown reason I feel secure being under the spell of his beautiful violet eyes.
The lecture is interesting and Yatsukami-sensei has a great talent of explaining his subject. I am impressed and I feel like I might love History even more from now on.
Or it was because of the teacher, who I am slowly but surely developing feelings for.
During the first month of the academic semester I was convincing myself that I didn't care about him. I tried to avoid him in the corridors in the University and made poor Hino-kun believe that I wanted to hang around more that we used to.
I was a little bit scared of my own emotions. Every night before closing my eyes and going to sleep I would remember Yatsukami-sensei: his perfect features, his manly posture, kind voice and mesmerizing violet eyes. This man took my breath away every single time I saw him.
And I was ashamed of myself. And scared of this whirlpool of strong emotions I felt towards him. And… one night, when I had a dream about him, I understood that I had fallen in love with the teacher. These feelings went in no comparison to those I had towards my best friend. The flips in my stomach and warmth in my heart appeared only when I had Yatsukami-sensei before my very eyes. Or it happened even when I was just thinking of him.
I didn't know what to do with my newly discovered affection. I was a student and he was a History teacher. Maybe such relations were not forbidden in the University, but they still sounded crazy. And I couldn't but feel confused.
And yet… my poor racing heart was on its limits. I wanted to confess, I wanted him to know what he was doing to me every time he placed his gorgeous eyes on me or called my name in that polite manner of his.
He was driving me crazy. And made me breathless. And filled my life with beautiful colours just by being himself.
"One of these days I am going to tell him I dream of him every night. I can't keep these feelings in secret anymore," I say out loud, staring at the white ceiling above me.
It is already past midnight and I still can't bring myself to sleep as the memories of my first crush keep popping up in my head. He is young, maybe two or three years older than me. And he always looks at me during the lectures. Is he really interested in me? Even if he is not right now, I will show him I care about him no matter what. He is the one to blame for making me fall in love with him!
What am I thinking?
I covered my reddened face with a blanket and shut my eyes tightly. I am losing my common sense because of these feelings. And I need to take a good rest for tomorrow's survey our History teacher is going to hold.
Thanks to my exhaustion from all the thinking I fall asleep almost instantly.
And I dreamed of him again this night. We stood in a field of purple flowers and stared into each other's eyes. The pleasant feeling of being secured remained till the very morning.
Today is Thursday and it appears being my favourite day of the week. Because on Thursdays we have two History lectures, which means I have a good chance to spend more time with my beloved teacher. But all my high spirits go low, when I realize that today's theme of the lesson is going to be filling the map of Tokyo during Taisho period. And I have to say that I am a complete zero in that field of knowledge. Usually, Hino-kun helps me to fill the maps, but today it was impossible, since the sample of the map lay in front of each student. And it means that I have to do the work all by myself. The thought brings a wave of misery as my forehead meets the cool surface of the desk in hopelessness.
The lecture starts and all the students dig in their classwork. I watch our sensei observing the group with his intent gaze. He tells us about the Taisho Democracy after World War I, while we try our best to grasp the new information and fill the map with the signs, writings and outlines following the task. Well, maybe the others are doing fine, but to me this task is a true nightmare. I marked several signs that I am sure are correct, but now I have not a single idea what I should do next. I have never been good in filling maps, not even during my school years.
It was a disaster. If we are doing it for a score, than I am sure I will get 10/100 maximum. The idea makes me want to burst into tears in despair. Why am I so useless? I desperately re-read the questions below the map and ready my pencil to make a mark – any mark – hoping that it will be a correct one. And when I was about to do it, I heard a pleasant voice above my head, which made my heart skip a beat.
"You are misleading this area," it said and the next moment I saw a delicate hand holding a pencil, which outlined the contour in my map in an elegant move.
I tried to calm my rapid heartbeat by making a deep inhale, but then the teacher leaned in closer to me, towering over my form from behind and continuing drawing the lines on the paper.
I have no idea what is going on with me. I can hear his steady breath on my ear and I can't avert my eyes from his beautiful skillful hand. My back feels warm from the heat he emits. And my head goes pleasantly dizzy from the sweet aroma scent that comes from my History teacher.
He smells like something so dear, so close and precious. I want to breathe in this scent and never let it fade away.
I turn my head a little and only now I realize that his face is right beside my own. He looks concentrated as he continues correcting and filling my excuse of a map. And I can't but admire his handsome face, trying to remember every feature. I have never seen him so close before. He has strong cheekbones, but the outline of his face is delicate. His cheek looks so smooth, that I have to fight the urge to touch it and feel its softness with my own fingers.
Leaning over, he turns his head to look at me with his gorgeous violet eyes that match my own. I hold my breath, when he opens his mouth trying to explain the meaning of each line he has just drawn in the map, but my mind isn't paying attention. My eyes are watching his moving lips and my ears are listening to the sweet melody of his voice.
I am helplessly drawn to him.
"Hanamaki-san, are you listening?"
It seems that he has finally noticed the state of his absent-minded student.
He furrowed his perfect eyebrows a little in frustration, and was about to say something else, but…
I can't help it anymore. I just have to do it!
Suddenly I take the chance and put my hands on his smoothly shaved cheeks, bringing his face to mine until our lips meet in a chaste kiss. His dizzying scent reached my senses and I pressed my mouth to his in a desperate attempt to fill in my heart with his presence. I remember the glimpse of his surprised expression, when I closed my eyes and emitted a soft moaning sigh.
It is Hino, who screams in astonishment, when he witnesses the scene where his best friend kisses the teacher. The voices of other students start filling the silent auditorium with loud whistles, jokes, chuckles and just cries of surprise. They must have thought they dreamed, when I kissed our teacher.
It doesn't last as long as I want it to, but I have a feeling that I need to open my eyes and look at the man I have given my first kiss to. What I see before me makes me wanna sing in joy and cry in embarrassment. I have never seen the teacher blush like that. I am sure that my own face is no better than his right now, and we both might look like fools to everyone. The screams on the background doesn't cease and I have finally realized what I have just committed!
Yatsukami-sensei is nearly petrified by my bold and daring actions. Obviously, he was taken by surprise, when I kissed him in front of the whole auditorium. Hino-kun is still making incoherent noses as he couldn't quite believe his eyes, when his shy and quiet friend kissed the teacher.
All of my classmates go wild and don't want to shut up. My actions will become the main gossip of the year for sure.
But right now I am drawn to my teacher's blushed face. As I hold my breath in fear and prepare to hear his scolding, the world with the background noses stands still. Yatsukami-sensei doesn't blink. He stares at me with his expressive eyes and tries to catch his rapid breath after my sudden kiss. I am ready for the worst outcome, though I don't regret following my impulse of kissing him. Even if he turns me down or rule me out of his class, I will never regret what I have done today.
We looked in each other's eyes for eternity, or so I thought. There were so many different emotions in his mysterious mirrors of soul, but I didn't notice contempt or hatred among them. He was surprised, shocked even, but he didn't hate me. It brought great relief to my poor trembling heart.
And after staring at each other like there is no tomorrow, he then smiles. And that kind of smile forces me to fall into a trance.
I was ready for any bad outcome, but I have never ever dreamed to see his smiling face, as if he is alright with what just happened.
I was and am in the seventh heaven, when I kissed my teacher. All my being flutters inside as I think of him and his warmth. I want to hug him and never let go. I want to keep on kissing him until I won't be able to think straight. I want to smell his unique scent. I want to be by his side and hear his pleasant voice that makes me shiver in delight.
I want to love him and be loved by him in return.
In return…
Am I too selfish to desire all of those things? Maybe I am just a dreamer, who convinced myself that there might be some kind of chemistry between us.
As I stare at him, my eyes start welling up with tears. Why am I so attracted to this man? Why is it so wonderful to see my reflection in his beautiful eyes?
And why is he so silent after all that happened?
A single tear rolled down my cheek as I blinked the wetness in my eyes away. I don't know why I am crying. My heart is aching, it longs for this man like he is the only reason I live. I have never felt this way before, and truth to be told, I got scared.
Perhaps, Yatsukami-sensei noticed the change in my mood, since his still blushing face showed concern. He reached out his hand to my cheek, probably to wipe away the tear, and when his long fingers were about to touch my face, I jolted up on my seat and ran away from the noisy auditorium not looking back.
I was embarrassed, but not regretful. I ran down the empty corridor towards the exit.
I need some time to think and to collect my shattered feelings. What I did today was a very difficult case. It may bring unpleasant consequences regarding my studying. But in reality, I am just scared of this entire situation. Was I too impulsive? Maybe I really made a huge mistake, but my heart tells me not to worry.
I wanted it to happen even if it happened not as I wanted it to.
My fast steps bring me closer to the entrance, when I feel a sudden touch on my forearm. Someone's strong hand tugged me, forcing me to stop on my tracks.
My nerves are on the edge. If Hino wants me to explain myself, I have no courage, nor desire to do it right now. I am sure he followed me after I ran away, he always did it, when I was in a mess of my feelings. But right now I don't want his company, because I don't know what to say.
I am about to tell him to leave me alone for a while, when he suddenly turns me to him and grabs me into a tight embrace, pressing my head to his chest.
Time stands still for me. I smell the familiar pleasant aroma of sweet flowers and fresh rain as I breathe in the scent of my friend.
But it wasn't Hino, who holds me in his arms right now. This scent belonged only to…
"Ichiko."
I gulped hard. The way his smooth gentle voice called my name made my knees tremble. His hot breath fanned the crown of my head. He holds me tight, a little too tight, but I don't mind.
He calls my name again, this time in a pained whisper and my eyes produce more tears.
Why does it feel so familiar and dear? Why do I crave for this sensation like I knew it before?
"We need to talk about lots of things. But not here. Follow me."
And my History teacher released me from his secure embrace. He took my hand in his and led me out of the building. We headed towards a nearest shrine and sat on a bench, surrounded with thick bushes and dwarf trees.
All this time he held my hand, as if convincing me to trust him. And I did.
Now he faces me and our eyes meet again. This time there is unlimited tenderness in his violet eyes, when he looks at me. It feels like he wants to take in every feature of my face. His gaze is gentle yet a little bit sad. I try to act calm, but in reality there is a knot of anxiety in my stomach. He brought me here, we are all alone and hidden from the prying eyes behind the greenery.
He brings his hand to my face and cups my cheek in his warm palm, caressing my skin with his thumb. I catch my breath, as I stare in his tender eyes. There are so many things I want to tell him, but all of the words are stuck in my throat. I am being childish, I know it, but I have no intention to ruin this little moment of peace.
"Ichiko."
Again. He calls my name in one slow exhale, which causes my heart to skip a beat. What is he doing to me?
The next moment he leans closer and wraps his arms around my back, taking me in his gentle embrace and kissing my temple softly.
"I can't believe I have finally found you," he whispers in my ear emotionally, making me shiver in his arms.
"Sensei," I tried to say something shyly, but he interrupted my intentions by shaking his head.
"No. I am Hanate and you have to remember me. Please remember me, Ichiko," he pleaded, never breaking his embrace.
I am so confused. I know his name, but I have never dreamed of calling him like that. It was too intimate, and I wasn't sure if he ever wanted me to be that close to him. Even in my dreams I kept on calling him Yatsukami-sensei. But now…
I tried to move my tongue in my mouth to pronounce his name without saying it out loud. It has a pleasant sensation as I repeat it again and again, until I accidently let it escape my lips.
"Hanate-onii-san," an unexpected combination of words slipped my tongue, making my teacher chuckle happily and bury his face in the crook of my neck. His sudden actions make me realize just how close our proximity is. The thought forces my face to burn in embarrassment.
"I am glad that you start to remember."
I hear him saying it with a sigh.
"I don't understand," now it was his turn to explain himself. I have not a single idea what happens and why he treats me like he knows me as someone more than a student.
To my surprise and disappointment he releases me from his arms and sits straight, looking me in the face. I notice that the more I look at him, the more dear he becomes to my heart. Am I just being deeply in love with him or do I know him from somewhere? It feels as if I am lacking some important part of my memory, because I can't explain this tightening sensation in my chest, when I see my teacher and when I touch him. It is as if I have lost something dear and now I have finally found it again.
"You've been to Okunezato this summer, right?"
His sudden question made me tense. How did he know about that trip? But I nodded in response, bringing a light smile on his face.
"I was there too."
"What?"
His serious gaze puzzles me. He notices the change in my mood and continues in a steady voice.
"We found and lost each other on the same day. You believed me being your older brother and I don't mind, since it was what I made you believe in. But that day you found out the truth and took me for who I was, or it's better to say for what I was."
"I remember the burnt field in the mountains but I don't know how I ended up standing there," listening to his sudden confession I have a strong feeling to share my own worries. I didn't talk to anyone about it, and now I have an opportunity to know the truth. I know it just by looking in this man's sincere eyes.
"That burnt field is the proof of your freedom and my disappearance from this world," he says seriously, taking my cool hand in his warm one. This small action from his side helps me to relax, though I didn't even notice that I was tensed. "You were in great danger, Ichiko. And I couldn't let you suffer from being eternal target for revenants. So I had to sacrifice myself by destroying the cursed flowers that kept me in this world. And the moment I disappeared, you forgot about everything concerning me and revenants."
"It's crazy!" I exclaimed but deep inside I knew he was telling the truth. The more I was thinking about his words, the more I felt like I was getting my memory back. Some pieces of long forgotten scenes appeared and disappeared before my eyes. The scenery of burning field and figure of my History teacher danced in my mind.
"You were there," I whispered with my paled lips. "I… I remember."
It is true. I recall the tragic day in the mountains of Okunezato, where I lost my brother after finding him. I remember him telling everything about his almost eternal life and about his attachment to a random kid, who was a perfect prey for revenants. And that kid was me.
I look at him with shocked eyes as my mind is flooded with the memories of his death. Our last embrace, our love confession and our first and only kiss we shared before I lost him forever.
Tears ran down my cheeks as I stare at him silently. He isn't my brother nor is he my teacher. He is the man I love, whom I thought I've lost, forgotten and now found again.
"Hanate!" I sob and touch his face, running my fingers down his jawline. He catches my hand and brings it to his lips, kissing it admiringly. "But how can it be?! I thought I would never see you again! You said I would forget about you forever, but my heart refused to wipe you away. Since the last day in Okunezato I felt like being deeply wounded. Nothing could fill the hole in my heart you had left after leaving me alone!"
I sob hard because the misery and solitude I have been enduring since that day crashed on me all at once. It was too painful, but as I look at Hanate I can't but feel happy.
"You are alive, aren't you?" I asked my silly question and received a sudden hug that knocked all the oxygen out of my lungs. He was strong and I wanted to feel his secure embrace forever, even if it makes me faint from suffocation.
"I am alive," he says in my ear and I wrap my arms around him tightly. "I am a living being. A human."
"Please, tell me what happened to you. I need to know," I pleaded, hiding my face on his firm shoulder, letting the fabric of his shirt absorb my tears.
He sighed and kissed my hair before starting his story.
"I hated her for as long as I remember. After living for centuries I didn't even remember the reason of my hatred. You know that my life was an eternal wandering before I met you. Ten years of spending time with you made me believe that I am not her mistake or some kind of a joke. I loved you dearly, Ichiko, but I could never tell you this, because you thought I was your brother. My last day in Okunezato and in this world became the happiest and the most tragic for me. You gave me your love and then I lost you forever. Or so I thought. She had another plans for me."
"She?" I couldn't grasp the whole meaning of his story, so I had to interrupt him and ask about the woman he was referring to.
"Iwanagahime. She is the one who created the field of cursed flowers and made me the first revenant."
I gasped but tried to calm down. I needed to hear the rest.
"After falling apart into millions of flower petals, I appeared before her. I thought that I would be angry and furious, but to my great surprise I didn't feel any of those negative emotions. I felt complete as if I had accomplished something important in the eternal life she had given me. Which was true. The field of cursed flowers was destroyed and you were out of danger. That was everything I needed to know. But Iwanagahime wasn't happy about the loss of her beloved flowers. She scolded me and humiliated me for what I had done. I was ready to face any cruelty from her side, but I had never expected to get a new chance. She told me that she hated me and all humans for our fickleness, but she didn't want to eliminate me because my feelings for you had changed her mind. She didn't believe in love and when she saw us on the field of burning flowers, her heart flinched. She said that she had never predicted that someone like me would be ready to give up on eternal life in the name of love towards a mortal human girl. And then she promised to grant me one single wish. It was a test from her side. She was still hoping to catch me on something cheap, I guess. But I declared my wish without another thought."
After he pauses, I ask him about what he had wished for, urging him to continue. We are still hugging each other and it feels nice, we share our warmth and nothing in the world matters right now.
"I wished for a life with you," he says finally, placing his forehead on my shoulder and inhaling my scent. His words and actions make me blush, but I have no intention to let him go. Not now – not ever again. "She said that all humans were fools and they would always be for wishing something as evanescent as a human life. I objected, telling her that a short life with a beloved person was the greatest gift I could ever dream of. She just laughed at me but promised to fulfill my wish. After parting our ways, I was revived, but not the way I thought I would be. I was born again as the only child of a nice married couple in 1993. I had no memory of my previous self or about you. I lived my life as Hanate Yatsukami, I finished school, then graduated from the University, but that entire time I felt like I was missing something in my life. The sensation was too strong, and I kept on searching for something, anything that would heal this need in my heart. I was popular among girls, but I couldn't bring myself dating any of them, because they were not what I was searching for. And then, my first day of becoming a History teacher came. And on that same day I saw you sitting right in front of me on the first row. The moment I saw you, all the memories crashed into my mind like an avalanche. It felt like a chest of distant, forgotten memories had been suddenly opened, revealing the secrets it had been hiding for a long time. You glowed and shined in my eyes like the most precious jewel in the world, and I unexpectedly realized that I have never seen you in colours before, because as a revenant I had monochrome eyesight. You were so beautiful that day, Ichiko."
He grips my shoulders tightly, gritting his teeth as if he is struggling with himself. I understand his state. It reminded me of my own, when I realized that I have found him again. It was a scaring and obsessive feeling of euphoria.
"I couldn't take my eyes off you. You were so bright, so full of colours and life and you were absolutely gorgeous. That instant, I knew I had just found what I was searching for all my life. It was you I was missing. And it was you, who I couldn't have, because you didn't remember me. Iwanagahime kept being in her own style. She granted my wish, she even made me be born in the same period of time, making me a little bit older than you, but she was cruel enough to seal my memories away. I am not sure if I would have ever been able to find you if I was given a job in some other University. I think, everything turned out well, because it's fate."
"I am sure we would have met each other no matter what," my trembling voice sounded in the brief silence before he spoke again.
"I don't want to think about the possibilities. You are here now and this is what I could ever dream about."
"But why didn't you tell me about everything earlier? Why did you wait for a whole month?" I insisted, stroking the thick hair on his nape. My tender caressing seems to help him to relax, as I feel more of his weight on my shoulder.
"I couldn't. I was a teacher to you. Moreover, I watched how you and Hino were getting along pretty well. I wanted you to be mine, but at the same time I had no guts to interfere in your life all of a sudden. It was… complicated."
"Hino-kun is just a friend," I told him bluntly and received a bitter chuckle in response.
"It seems, only you think that way. I have always liked him, he is a good kid, but…really… Poor guy," Hanate let out a small laugh and continued his speech. "I am sure you were aware of my attraction to you during the lectures. I didn't want to interfere in your life too boldly, but at the same time I didn't want to lose my chance I was given. Yes, I kept on looking at you, because it was the only thing I was permitted to do as a teacher. I tried to run into you during the breaks, just to let you know that I was around. And if to be honest, I just wanted you to start liking me as a man. It was selfish, I know, but seeing you almost every day and not being able to talk to you or hug you, like we used to do, was unbearable."
"I…I felt the same way," I confessed shyly, burring my hand into his hair. I enjoyed the sensation of his hair falling between my fingers. "I didn't know what was happening to me, but you lived in my thoughts and mind ever since our first encounter. I was dreaming about you daily and nightly. Those feelings scared me, but I couldn't fight the affection towards my teacher. Everything about you was just right. Your appearance, you name, your voice, even your scent. Especially your scent. It calms me and makes me want to inhale it forever. When I first heard your name, I burst into tears. That day I didn't know why, but now I understand that my heart have recognized you and wanted to unite with you again. And today… I just followed my impulsive desire and did what I did," my voice sounded defeated as I remembered our forbidden kiss.
"I was dreaming of you doing it to me, Ichiko."
His smooth voice enchanted me. Hanate lifted his face from my shoulder and looked in me in the eyes. His own eyes were darker than usual. He shifted his hand from my back to my jaw and caressed my lower lip with his thumb, sending electric jolts down my spine. His gaze slowly crawled down to my mouth and I unintentionally opened it in anticipation.
"If only you could know how beautiful you are right now," he exhales and I feel his moist breath on my mouth. "Your colours are brighter than the sun to me. I love you so much, Ichiko."
My head gets dizzy. His confession is so strong and pure that my heart can't take it anymore. I leaned in to him and touched his smooth lips with my own. But this time he took the initiative in his hands and deepened the kiss, making it passionate, fierce, yet eternally tender and sweet. His left hand holds me tightly, pressing me to his firm chest, while his right hand buries into my hair and pushes my nape forward, bringing my face even closer to his.
"I love you," we keep on exchanging our confessions between the kisses. Our hands are everywhere, we try to remember every inch of each other. His broad shoulders, his well-toned chest and firm torso. His developed back and thick hair. I am in awe from having him in my arms.
As a hushed moan escapes my lips, he stops suddenly and leaves my mouth in peace. His breathing is rapid as he tries to fill his lungs with needed oxygen. I am no better than him, as I try to steady my own breathing.
"We need to stop. I am not sure I will be able to control myself next time you kiss me," his declaration sounds logic. I, myself, am not sure what happens if I take him in my arms again.
"So, what do we do now?" I ask still breathing hard. "I don't know if I may continue studying after the performance I caused in your class."
If to be honest, this thought was bugging me a lot. A student kissed her teacher in front of many eyes. It was impropriate to no limits.
"Don't worry. I will deal with it. Another thing I have to thank Iwanagahime for is that she did not deprive me of my skill to manipulate people's memories. When I recalled who I am, I gained this skill again. So, don't worry. Tomorrow they won't remember anything. I am sure of it, because Hino wanted to run after you, but I told him that you were my fiancée and he believed me. So, my skills work just fine."
"Fiancée?!" the word shocked me to no limits. "Why did you tell him that?"
"I am a selfish posessive guy, who wants you by his side," Hanate said in a dead serious tone and took something out of his shirt. It was a necklace with a ring on it. "It's better for him to know that you are not single anymore. It will solve lots of problems in the future."
"Where did you get the ring?" I was a little bit tired of getting surprised. I silently watch him unattaching the ring from the necklace and taking my hand in his.
"You might not believe me, but I bought it, when I was still in high school. My need for you was intoxicating, though I didn't even know who or what I was looking for. When I saw this ring I just knew that I have to buy it. And it seems that I wasn't wrong. It has always been meant to be yours."
With those words he slips the tiny golden ring on my wedding finger and the size matches mine perfectly.
My eyes well with tears of joy and love towards this man.
"H-hanate…I…"
"I've lived for 25 long years only to see the day, when I would meet you again. For you it's been no longer than two months since we separated in Okunezato. Now I have to ask you this question," he takes both my hands in his and looks deeply in my eyes. "Will you marry me, Ichiko? Because I don't want to live any more of the days without you by my side."
It was a cruel reality. He was sent to be born in the past in order to be alive and in the right age to meet me. Iwanagahime was a smart woman after all. And judging by her deeds, she didn't hate Hanate. She actually loved him. Loved him so much that she gave him a new life – a full one, where he could be a human with supernatural physiologic powers. I was truly grateful to her for this gift, because she saved not only him, but me as well.
"I will gladly marry you!" I throw myself into him, forcing him to catch me in his secure embrace. "I love you, Hanate! Please, promise me that you will never disappear again and never ever leave me. Promise me!"
My tears wet his neck, as I nuzzle helplessly to him. I won't let go of him anymore! He is mine no matter how childishly it may sound.
"I promise. I will always be with you and protect you from anything," he says in a deep and sincere voice and stokes my head gently. "So, let's get married as soon as possible. I won't be able to act calm if you are away from my sight."
"I agree. Please, take good care of me," I finish our little dialogue with traditional words of a bride. He chuckles in response and averts me from him a little, to look into my tear-stained face.
"I will."
With those words Hanate lowers his head and captures my lips in a slow and sensual kiss.
I don't need anything in this world if he is here with me. With him by my side I feel like I can do anything.
He is the man, who I entrust my life to. And it has been always like that, starting from my childhood and now it will last till the end of our days. We will be happy, I am sure of it.
Love isn't easy – it's hard enough, but we will cope with any problem and bring our feelings on a new level no matter what.
Together.
I have never regretted that I kissed the teacher that fateful day.
The End
A/N There are two illustrations for this story made by a wonderful CG-artist Daria Gift. Please, find us at archiveofourown dot org and see the attached pictures in the text. Our nickname there is Kit2000andAnna.
