What's Love to You?
Prologue
'Love…they say is a luxury afforded only to the rich. The poor are too busy trying to survive the harsh realities in their daily life to pursue the ideals and notion of true love.'
He couldn't help but concur to the truth of it as he ran the quote over in his mind and looked around him…this life he grew and live in. The news-vendor at the end of the street who constantly bemoans the lost of an un-filial son whom she had rather not borne, Takahito-san who lives upstairs at Block B trying desperately to cope with the insurmountable medical bills incurred by his wife and a teenage daughter that refuses to break up with her boyfriend who is the local ruffian, the lady and many other girls across the street who sees love only as a business transaction, the results of being shoved into the world too young and now too jaded to live another life and him…the local junkie who never had a chance…
They have only known this world and nothing beyond, they had problems to settle, bills to pay and jobs to keep. What's love? They asks when he gets into his mode and starts his usual tirade of how unjust life is and what are they here for, how lonely life is and when will he ever find the reason for his life. Love, to him, means someone will be there when he is in need, someone to show him another world that he could escape to, someone who gives hope in his life and someone who will tell him that he will never be left alone to fend for himself. But he's passed the age for frilly romance and wistful thoughts, he just wants a life where he no longer has to con or rob or sell his body for his next high. Someone to set his life right…
That somehow seems like a far flung dream….
He got up and kicked at the dented soda can with his feet, sending it into a noisy roll down the pathway ridden with cigarette butts and the residue of vomit from party revelers the night before and stuck his hands into his worn out leather jacket to try to steal some warmth during this cold winter night. It was nights like these that made him feel most lonely…the anticipation of another holiday, the people who are rushing home to join their love ones and friends who had gathered in groups at the local pub for the New Year countdown. He walked down the street encountering lovers who held hands and whispered sweet nothings into each other's ears, best friends that laughed and giggled among themselves sharing some secret jokes that none outside their circle will understand and colleagues saying goodnight after a day's work…where does he fit into all these? He can't dismiss the immense loneliness he feels at that moment.
He wondered briefly if it would be a good idea to commit suicide on New Year's Eve so that people would find it easier to remember his death anniversary and then realize that it was too morbid a thing to be thinking of on a night like this. It wasn't like he didn't have friends but hanging out with another bunch of losers won't make snap him out of this glum. Maybe he should look for Lil'Rock and get some of it…but decided against the idea since he hadn't paid him for the last batch of goods he took from him. Lil'Rock may be an old acquaintance but he wasn't a charity case and there was only so much grace an old acquaintance is willing to provide.
He sighed and let out a heavy breath and watch the smoky breath dissipate into the air, maybe he should just go home. Welcoming the New Year with a bottle of sake and a pack of cigarettes seems to be a great idea now. He strolled into the nearest 7/11 and quickly made his purchases with what he could afford and stepped back into the chilly night and it was then that he slammed into a pillar that was adorn with one fine suede jacket and black woolen scarf. The impact caused him to stumble back and lost grip on his purchases and he watch helplessly as the last thing that could be of comfort to him smashed to the floor…he righted himself and flipped at some silver strands that was jarred out of place and glared at the offensive pillar with angry gray eyes and stood there awaiting the apology that never came and he glared harder.
The pillar if not somewhat daft just walked past him with a smile that seems to bring along the summer and entered the shop without a backward glance and it was all it took for him to lose the last vestiges of control he has of his mood. He stomped in after The pillar and spotted him infront of the chiller.
"Hey! You! Don't you know how to say sorry?" he bellowed as he followed the man around the shop and continued to hurl profanities at him disregarding the curious and hostile looks the other patrons were giving him.
"Hey! I'm talking to you! Quit ignoring me!" he tried again but to no avail and watched the man approached the cashier to pay for his purchases. He was livid now, it was true that he was nobody but his pride refused to let himself be snubbed at in such a degrading fashion.
He stomped directly infront of the man just as he exited the store and was about to open his mouth again when he felt something pressed against his palm. He looked down to see a plastic bag containing the same items he had bought in it.
"Sorry, I tend not to pay attention to where I'm walking sometimes…haha." The pillar spoke, his voice abnormally cheerful just like his smile and the way his eyes crinkle up with easy mirth. It was an expression that told people how open this person is and full of warmth. How could anyone smile like that in such dreary weather was quite beyond him, infact, he finds it mildly aggravating.
"My name is Takeshi Yamamoto…what's yours?"
"What business is it of yours?" Gokudera answered grumpily.
"Maa…haha…you must have had a stressful day but it's no good excuse to be drinking that much." The pillar whose name is called Yamamoto gave him a slight wave of the index finger as he glance once again to the bottle of sake in the plastic bag before he slung his arm over his shoulder and Gokudera wondered why he bothered to explain when he could walk away right now because he will explode if he hears that laugh again.
"I didn't say it was for myself…" he answered defensively and found it strange to be lying to a complete stranger. He was that pathetic now, isn't it?
"Don't you have somewhere to go?" he asked as he attempted to shrug off the heavy appendage upon his shoulder.
"Well, I'll be meeting some friends later. Would you like to come along? It's New Year's Eve, the more the merrier!"
He looked at Yamamoto and wondered if the man was truly dense…or was he normally that friendly to every stranger he meets?
"I don't know you besides I have a prior arrangement." He said in a matter of fact.
"Maa…haha…well, we'll know each other once you give me a name." Yamamoto insisted, friendly smile still plastered on his face.
"…."
"It's only a name." Yamamoto smile and prodded again.
"Hayato…Gokudera." He replied hesitantly and gave a nervous glance at Yamamoto, wondering why in the world he would want a name of a stranger he would probably never meet again.
"Well Gokudera, it was nice meeting you. I wish you a Happy New Year, see you around." Yamamoto gave him a two finger salute before stepping into the limo waiting for him outside the store by the street.
Gokudera nodded in response and walked away in the opposite direction…
Takeshi Yamamoto…the name was strangely familiar…
