CIRCLE OF LIFE

The file just kept reappearing. It was almost five years old and so she had moved it to the "Derek's Old Cases" drawer ... again and again. But it kept popping up - on her desk, on her chair, even in her brief case. So Amelia stopped filing it away and kept it on the desk in the "To Be Filed" bin. Derek's picture was just behind the bin, staring out at her.

"Okay, Derek, I get it... You're trying to tell me something, something about this patient who you treated four years ago. But what?" she humphed.

Amelia really had no idea what she was supposed to be looking for. The file was labeled "Patient C", no personal information about the patient was inside the folder. Just a couple pages of Derek's chicken scratch. The first page had a chart on it - numbers headlined the columns "O" to "9" and a bunch of numbers under each column that she really didn't understand what they represented. And the chart wasn't fully filled out - Derek stopped filling it in after column "5" - but the numbers in the previous columns were within the relative range of each other. Column "4" had letters written at the bottom: "DAOM" was circled and recircled and recircled... Amelia could picture Derek sitting at his desk circling it over and over again, absent-mindedly but clearly upset. Underneath those letters were "RIP".

Amelia slammed the file shut. "You haven't given me anything to work with!" she grumbled at her brother's picture as she pushed away from the desk. She grabbed her notebook and headed out of the office. She was late for a staff meeting.

Derek rolled his eyes as he watched his sister storm out of the office. He had been sitting on the arm of her office couch - unseen, obviously - while she looked over the file. He went over and sat in her chair, though technically it was his chair. It felt weird. He shifted positions a couple of times and then sighed. Clearly Amelia has made the chair her own, he grimaced. Turning his attention away from the chair, he looked around the desk. Deja vu. It had been almost two years since he was last in this office. The picture Amelia had of him was a very un-medical one: he was at the trailer, grilling up some of his freshly caught Trout. He wondered if she chose that picture on purpose, as not to feel threatened by his being THE Dr. Shepherd doctors, residents, and interns referred to. If they referred to Amelia, it was always, "Oh, right, the OTHER Dr. Shepherd." He, of course, couldn't control how people viewed Amelia or her opinion that he could have done more to not make her feel that way. He shrugged - he supposed he could have. But that wasn't his job then and it certainly wasn't now. Now, his job was to connect Amelia with his patient before it was too late. He picked up the file. It was true there wasn't a lot to go on, but Amelia was missing the big picture, in part because she was letting her emotions get in the way. Growing up with four sisters, Derek understood about women and their emotions. That's why he had rarely ever let himself get emotional and focused on the three C's: calm, cool, and collected. "She'll figure it out," he assured himself. "She has too."

Amelia entered the conference room. Chief Bailey briefly looked up at her as she walked in, but Amelia didn't say anything as she grabbed a seat next to Owen. Fifteen minutes later the meeting was over. Thankfully this wasn't a lecture hall in med school with a pop quiz pending because Amelia would surely flunk it, as she couldn't tell you what was said. She spent the whole meeting doodling in her notepad "DAOM" and the number "4", circling both much the way she had seen the letters circled in the file.

"Still thinking about that patient file of Derek's?" Owen asked as he and Amelia lingered behind.

"Clearly he's trying to tell me something about this patient," Amelia sighed, "and I haven't got a clue."

Owen smiled sympathetically. This file had been bothering his wife for the past couple of days, to the point she was beginning to lose sleep over it. He wasn't one to believe in signs from the afterlife, but Amelia did and he couldn't deny that the file has just seemed to mystically appear time and again. "The case is not yet five years old, right?" he queried suddenly struck with a thought.

"Right. So?"

"So it would still be in the computer's mainframe. A file doesn't automatically go into the back-up system until it's five years old."

"Yes, but I don't know what I would look up since there isn't a name in the file."

"But there is a patient identification number... Derek would have had to log the patient's personal information in the computer otherwise the information wouldn't get saved," Owen pointed out.

Amelia shot up. "The Patient ID number! Why didn't I think of that? Why didn't you think of this sooner?" she grumbled. She grabbed her notebook and tore out of the conference room, with a vigor in her step and newfound determination to solve the mystery. Owen simply chuckled under his breath as he followed her out.

Amelia quickly dashed into her office, grabbed the file off her desk, and dashed back out, making a beeline for the hospital's computer mainframe. Even though Derek wasn't working any active cases back then due to splitting his time between Seattle and Washington, D.C., if he saw this Patient C he would have kept an official record of it. Owen came up behind Amelia as she quickly typed in her password to access the mainframe and typed in the Patient ID number in the file. "I am actually going to be able to sleep tonight!" she gushed as she waited for the information to come up.

The screen dung. Owen's eyes widened in surprise as Amelia looked at the pop-up message confused. "What the hell is this?" she fumed, furiously punching keys on the keyboard to remove the message and get to the information she needed, but the pop-up message remained: PASSCODE ACCESS ONLY.

"What the hell is this, Owen?" Amelia shook her head in annoyance. "Why would Derek require a passcode to access a patient's file in the computer?"

Derek watched from the doorway to Amelia's office. His eyes had shot up with curiosity when she had rushed in and grabbed the file from the desk. He couldn't hear what she and Owen were saying, but he could see them by the computer mainframe and was trying to recall what, if any, information he had logged about this patient. Then he remembered -just as Amelia stormed back into the office, followed by Owen, "passing" him on her way back in.

"A passcode access ... why would he have done that?" she fumed, pacing. She turned and grabbed Derek's picture off her desk. "Why would you have done that!" She half threw the picture back on her desk in annoyance.

"My guess is he didn't want anybody coming across the information, either on purpose or accidentally." Owen offers.

"But why?"

"He didn't want to take the chance of anyone finding out who he was treating."

"But why?"

Owen shrugged. "I have no idea!"

"Great...just great," Amelia fumed more to herself. "Now I have to come up with a date Derek would have used as a passcode...there are just a few BILLION possibilities!"

The next day Amelia groggedly made her way out to the Bay. Her long, curly dark hair was haphazardly pulled back in a ponytail and her clothes clearly hastily put on given their disshelved appearance. She had spent most of the night coming up with dates Derek could have possibly used as a passcode and most of the morning trying them out, with no success. Two ambulances were pulling up and doctors running to them as they stopped to see what they had in terms of patients. Amelia looked up as the second ambulance pulled in, but instead of rushing to it, she remained in place, her eyes transfixed. There, on the outer skirts of the Bay, was Derek - or someone who looked like him. She blinked and the image was gone.

"Shepherd!" Bailey called out.

Amelia shook her head as if clearing away cobwebs in front of her. "Sorry, what do we got?"

Bailey looked at her attending cross-eyed. She has been acting weird the last few days - at least weirder than usual. But she decided to hold her tongue for now as they had trauma patients to tend to. She turned back to the patients, but her eye caught on something. "What's wrong?" Amelia asked anxiously. She noticed that Bailey seemed to be looking, transfixed, in the same area where she had seen Derek just a few minutes before. Bailey shook her head. "Nothing ... I thought I saw someone I knew," she explained, dismissing it in the next breath. "Let's go! There are patients to tend to!" Amelia paused as she turned to go back into the hospital. She looked to the outskirts of the Bay. No one was there.

Once the emergencies were dealt with, Amelia approached Bailey at the Nurse's Desk. "Yes, Shepherd?" the chief inquired without looking up from the chart she was writing in. "Out in the Bay earlier, you said you thought you saw someone you once knew," Amelia began, "and..and I..." Amelia hesitated almost embarrassed.

"Shepherd!" Bailey snapped impatiently, glaring up at her attending.

Amelia swallowed. "I was wondering if it was Derek," she spit out, looking around to make sure no one could really hear what she was saying.

"Derek?"

"Yeah, you know, Derek my brother."

"I know who Derek is!" Bailey snapped again, turning back to her chart.

A few seconds passed. Amelia stood waiting for an answer. Bailey looked back up at her. "You're serious?" she realized. She shook her head, stating emphatically, "I don't see dead people Shepherd!"

"Alrighty then," Amelia said, trying to cover her feeling of foolishness with a smile. She was extremely grateful when Owen approached them and quickly led her husband to the other side of the desk.

"Are you still going to Atlanta with Nathan tomorrow?" she exhaustedly asked her husband.

Owen confirmed that he was and knew she didn't want him going because of this file mystery. "Any luck?" he asked, rubbing her arm sympathetically.

"No. I have tried every date/number combination that meant anything to Derek - from his birthday, Mer's birthday, his kids' birthday, birthdays of my Mom and sisters, date my dad died, his old locker combo in high school - and nothing. Nada. Zilch. I am no closer to finding out about Patient C."

Bailey's eyes shot up at hearing Amelia's words. Amelia placed her tired head in her hands in frustration as Owen took her gently in his arms, reassuring her she would figure it out. "Maybe Derek will somehow provide a clue," he whispered into her hair. "In the meantime, let's go get coffee." Amelia's pager went off. Bailey finished her charting. She handed the nurse the last chart and walked away as Amelia glanced at her pager. "Do you need to take that?" Owen asked. Amelia didn't recognize the number. "No, let's go get coffee."

The daylight - as light as it ever really gets in Seattle - is quickly fading as Bailey sits at her desk. She hears Amelia's voice in her head - "I am no closer to finding out about Patient C" - as her mind flashes to her and Amelia at the Bay earlier that morning - "I thought I saw someone I knew." Bailey taps her fingers on the desk. "Could it have been?" she mulls. She takes out her phone, pushes a button, and hits dial. "Damn, voice mail!" she mutters, closing the phone. She taps her fingers again, then quickly gets up and leaves the office.

"Grey?" Bailey calls as she hurriedly approaches Meredith in the hallway. "Finished for the day?"

"I am." Meredith smiles, then looks over at Bailey almost panicked. "Unless you need me for something?"

"No...oh, no!" Bailey assures her, waving her arm for emphasis. "I just wanted to ask you something, you still have Derek's phone, right?"

"I do."

"Do you have it with you?"

"I do."

"I was wondering if you'd mind if I borrowed it. I ... wanted to look up a person I think he might have in his Contacts."

Meredith pulls the phone from her pocket. "What's the name?" she asks as she opens the phone.

"Actually I'm not sure," Bailey replies. Meredith eyes her superior inquisitively. "That's why I wanted to borrow it... I might know it if I see it."

"Oh, okay. Here you go." Meredith hands Bailey the phone.

"I will make sure to get this back to you," Bailey assures her.

Meredith smiles - she doesn't doubt it. Bailey nods awkwardly and walks away. Meredith stares after her, looking somewhat confused, before continuing to the locker room to grab her purse and jacket.

"Hey, just popping in to say goodnight," Meredith says, entering the staff lounge, surprised to find only Amelia there.

"At least one of us is getting to go home!" Amelia spats, pouring herself a cup of coffee.

Meredith rolls her eyes. Amelia's tone definitely had a 'woe-to-me' edge to it, the kind she uses when she's trying to elicit sympathy. She opens her mouth to say something, but changes her mind. Truthfully, she did not want to get sucked into her sister-in-law's all too frequent 'Poor Me' pity parties, not tonight anyway. "Well, goodnight," she says, turning to leave.

"This may seem like an out of left field question," Amelia begins as Meredith freezes mid-turn. She curses under her breath before turning back towards Amelia. "Do you know of a patient Derek possibly treated four years ago, I think, under the radar?"

"No!" Meredith says quickly, "So good -"

"It would have been around the time he started splitting his time between here and D.C.," Amelia persists. She's clearly oblivious to Mer's attempts to make a quick getaway, or maybe she's just choosing to be.

"No, and I have to go. Sorry."

Before Amelia can say anything else, Mer has turned on her heel and strode out of the lounge. She sits down on the sofa, nursing her cup of coffee, dejected. She feels like she's letting Derek down because she can't figure out who the patient is. The door opens again, slightly, and there stands Meredith. "Unless you count 'monitoring' as treating."

Amelia immediately perks up. "Derek was monitoring a patient? I didn't know that."

Meredith shrugs, coming completely into the lounge now. "Yeah, he signed off on some procedure and she had a pre-existing condition that needed monitoring." Her voice is tight, her face taut.

"I know you and Derek were having problems back then and I'm sorry to dredge that up," Amelia says sympathetically. She takes a sip of her coffee. "It's just I can't shake the feeling that Derek is trying to tell me something about this patient."

Meredith sighs. "It's okay... I mean it was a rough time for us. Derek was upset that I had changed my mind about going to D.C. and I was upset that he wanted to go - and this patient staying with him didn't help matters," she admits. "You have to remember the bad with the good, right?"

"This patient stayed with Derek in D.C.?" Amelia gulps. "Why didn't I know this?"

"Yeah, she needed to be monitored medically, so they stayed with him."

"They?"

"The patient and her daughter... I think Derek said she was eleven," Mer explains.

"Why did she need monitoring?" Amelia presses, taking another sip of coffee.

Meredith shakes her head. "Don't know...never asked and Derek never offered. The only time we talked about her, or really argued about her, is when he left to go back to D.C. early because of, I guess, medical issues with her."

*FLASHBACK*

Derek and Meredith are sitting on the window seat in the living room, watching their guests mingle. Mer had planned the dinner party as a means of formally welcoming Maggie into the family. "As much as I hate that you and Amelia are fighting, I'm glad for Bailey calling you, if for no other reason it got you to come home early and you're able to be here for this," she says, contently placing her head on her husband's shoulder. "Amelia's fighting with me," he protests, grimacing towards his sister.

"Whatever... I'm just glad you're here," Meredith smiles. She looks towards her newfound sister, "What do you think of Maggie?"

"She seems very nice," Derek offers.

"But she's not Lexie," Meredith notes, picking up on what he's not saying.

"No, she's not Lexie," he agrees, squeezing his wife's hand. "But I'm glad you have somebody. Having a sibling is important, particularly one who's the same sex."

Meredith stares at her husband. "You miss Mark?"

"I do," Derek sighs, as his phone rings. Meredith grimaces as he looks at the Caller ID. "I don't recognize the number," he says as he answers.

"Hello? ... Speaking ... That's correct ..." Derek withdraws his hand from his wife's. "I realize there is a time difference, but why am I just being notified about this now? ... I'm not at a place where I can talk freely about this patient," he gets up from the window seat and walks towards the foyer, "so why don't you just fill me in."

Meredith watches Derek from her perch on the window seat. An excited and overwhelmed Maggie approaches. Everyone's sitting for dinner. Derek comes back into the room. "I need to talk to you," he tells Meredith, nodding apologetically to Maggie. He leads his wife into the kitchen, where he explains his patient is in the hospital.

"And you feel you have to go back to D.C.," Mer realizes disappointed.

"She's my patient."

"You're only monitoring this patient for a pre-existing condition, which means you're not her primary doctor," Meredith protests, "so why do you have to go now? By the time you get there, she'll likely be asleep. There's nothing you can do for her medically."

"I can be there."

"As a doctor or as something else?"

"You're right...there's nothing I can do for her medically-speaking."

"But you feel you need to go and be there."

"It's just this patient - " Derek pauses. "It's just she and her daughter ... They don't have anybody else."

Meredith just nods, her face awash in hurt.

*END OF FLASHBACK*

A silence falls between her and a guilty-looking Amelia. "It was a difficult time," Mer says after a moment as she finally joins Amelia on the couch. "The other time he left was a few months later. In fact it was after he had decided to scale back his work in D.C. He got a call in the middle of the night."

*FLASHBACK*

Meredith and Derek are asleep in bed. A phone rings...Derek reaches absently for his phone on the night table. "Where's my phone?" he queries sitting up. He rubs his eyes.

"Over here," Meredith replies, still half-asleep.

"Why is my phone on your night table?" Derek reaches over his sleeping wife for the phone.

"Because you left it there when you set it down there." She picks up the phone and looks at the Caller ID. "Who's Squirt?" she asks, raising her head a bit.

Derek grabs the phone from her hand, quickly answering it. "Hey...you and your Mom alright?" he asks anxiously, now wide awake and sitting up. Meredith rolls over to look at him. "What? ... It's only seven months!" He gets out of the bed, motioning to Meredith that he was going out into the hallway.

Meredith is sitting on the bed wide awake when Derek comes back in several minutes later. "Let me guess ... you're going back to D.C."

"She's not in DC, but I do have to go," Derek says quickly dressing, "and we can argue about this when I get home." He leans over and gives her a peck on the cheek. "I'll call you," he finishes as he rushes out.

*END OF FLASHBACK*

Another silence lapses between the sister-in-laws. Amelia bites down on her lower lip before beginning. "He said, 'It's only seven months' ... Could she have been pregnant? I mean that would make sense. If she had a pre-existing condition, she'd have to be monitored during the pregnancy and ... " Amelia pauses, as her eyes widen with a sudden realization, "... and the chart in the file - 'O' to '9', there are nine months in a pregnancy."

Meredith appears to think about this. "You're right," she says finally, "that would make sense. The seven months thing didn't register until you just said it."

Derek, sitting at the table, shakes his head. "I can't believe it took this conversation for her to realize what '0 to 9' meant. I mean really that should have been a no-brainer!"

"I don't know," Meredith continues, getting up and pulling her handbag up over her shoulder. "Like I said we were arguing about everything back then: work, home, the kids, this patient, Izzie, the weather ... everything."

Amelia looks up at her curiously. "Izzie? Where do I know that name from?"

"What?" Meredith queries startled.

"You just rattled off a list of things you and Derek were fighting about back then. You said 'Izzie'," Amelia says standing now. "I know that name, but how?"

Meredith pauses, appearing shocked. After a second she explains, "Izzie was a doctor here, she and Alex were married, she left." Her voice is curt. "I haven't seen or spoken to her in almost five years."

"And yet you and Derek had an argument about her four years ago... " Amelia muses.

"I have to go, Amelia. The kids are waiting." Meredith says abruptly and briskly walks out of the lounge, passing Dr. Webber on the way. He starts to say hi, but she walks right past him without even acknowledging him.

Owen sets his bag down by the door. He, Nathan, and Alex are going to Atlanta in the morning to the Shep Mobility Network Center, which specializes in working with children with severe limb deformities. Arizona and Nathan think a patient of theirs could benefit from a new occupational therapy system they have, Delivering Acute Orthopedic Mobility. He's going in place of Arizona, who got called to New York City for an emergency with Sophia. The child fell off her bike and broke her left arm, and Arizona wanted to go be there with her when she had the arm reset and placed in a cast. Alex was going, at her request, on a fact-finding mission about the system and the center itself. He and Nathan both had their reservations about Alex going, but Owen understood that Arizona was simply trying to keep Alex involved, even though he was still on suspension after the whole Jo/DeLuca debacle.

Owen sits at his desk, running a tired hand through his hair. He looks at his watch. He picks up the phone. "Hey, I thought you'd be home by now," he says.

"Yeah, sorry, got to talking to Mer," Amelia apologies. She's now back in her office. "It seems Patient C is someone Derek monitored four years ago. She stayed with him at his place in D.C."

"Really? So Meredith knows who this patient is."

"No, they never really discussed her. It seems her staying with him was a sore point."

Owen nods, slightly bemused. "Can't imagine why."

"Yeah, really," Amelia agrees. Derek, flipping through a medical journal on the couch, glances up briefly towards his sister. He can only imagine what she and Owen are saying. "Anyway, I'm going to call Addison and see if she knows what DAOM stands for. I think this patient was pregnant and DAOM stands for some condition that maybe she developed at the fourth or fifth month."

"OK, just don't overdo it," Owen cautions. "I'll wait up."

"You're going to call Addison." Derek places the journal on the couch next to him. He sighs, his foot tapping against the floor. "It makes sense that you would, it's just ..." He lets out a deep breath, " ... this could really open a can of worms."

Owen is hanging up when Amelia calls out to him. "Hey, you still there?"

"Yeah."

"Did you know Izzie Stevens?"

Owen leans back in his chair, eyebrows raised, "I did... why?"

"What's the deal with her and Meredith?"

"I don't know that there is one," he says confused. "I mean, I know she wasn't happy when Izzie left. As far as I know, nobody has seen or heard from her since she left Seattle."

"Hmm," Amelia muses. "OK, I'm going to get back to my Patient C mystery. Love you."

Amelia looks at her watch. It was now approaching 9 p.m., and she hadn't made any further dent into the Patient C mystery. She looks thoughtfully as her fingers drum on Patient C's file. "The 'C' has to mean something, right?" She looks over at Derek's picture. "I mean why the letter 'C', that's very random. Why not 'X' or 'Y' or 'Z'? The 'C' is a clue, right? Maybe the initial of her first or last name? ... Damn, I wish you could answer me!"

"I wish I could answer you too. It would certainly speed this process up." Derek is stretched out on the sofa now, still reading the journal. "It's a really good thing I don't have a curfew."

Amelia sighs. She hits speaker and #3 on her phone's Speed Dial pad. On the fourth ring, a sleepy voice picks up. "You do know it's almost midnight, right?"

"It's only 9 p.m.!" Amelia protests.

Addison climbs out of bed, pushing her long red hair to the side. "Not on the East Coast. I'm in Atlanta." She yawns as she curls up on the loveseat in her hotel room. "What's going on?"

"What does DAOM mean?" Amelia asks anxiously.

"I have no idea."

"Is it a condition pregnant women get?"

"Um, no. At least I've never heard of it. Why?"

"I am trying to find out about a patient - Patient C to be exact - of Derek's and these letters are written at the bottom of Column Four on a chart of columns headlined 'O to 9'. I think she was pregnant."

"She was."

Amelia's eyes widen in surprise. She lifts the receiver off the phone. "What did you just say?" she asks stunned.

"You're talking about Derek's patient from four years ago, right?" Addison says.

"How do you know about this patient when no one here seems to know anything about her?" Amelia demands.

"Derek consulted me."

"Why would Derek consult you?"

"Why else would Derek consult me?" Addison snaps back, not sure if she should be offended or not.

"Right ... " Amelia says apologetically. "Sorry, Addie, it's just I've been trying to find out who this patient is for the past few days and now all of a sudden to find out you worked on this case could be the breakthrough I need."

"I didn't work on the case," Addison corrects.

"You just said you consulted on the case."

"Derek called me about the patient, but I didn't work on the case. Jake and I were in Germany at the time. He emailed me her records and asked me for my opinion."

"About what?"

"Whether or not she'd be able to carry to term. I think she was four months along. She was pregnant with triplets. She started bleeding - ALOT - and lost one of the babies. After they got her stabilized the doctor said she should be able to carry the two remaining babies to term, but Derek wasn't sure and wanted a second opinion."

"Why was Derek even involved in the case?"

"My understanding was she had a pre-existing condition that needed to be monitored."

"What was the condition - that might be able to help me find out who she is?"

"It didn't come up. It was wasn't relevant to what he was asking me about."

Amelia sighs in frustration. "What exactly did he say?"

Derek's ears perk up.

"Amelia it was four years ago!"

"Addie, please think," Amelia pleads. "This is really important and maybe he said something that will help me find out who she is."

Addison shakes her head. "Okay, let me think."

*FLASHBACK*

Addison is sitting at a table on the balcony of her and Jake's hotel room, enjoying her daily cocktail, when her phone rings. She looks at the Caller ID. "Washington, D.C." she mutters opening her phone. "Hello?"

"Addison!" a booming voice comes through loud and clear.

"Derek?" Addison queries surprised. "I didn't recognize the number - this isn't your cell phone."

"No, I'm calling from a hospital in D.C. Can I email you a patient's records? I want your opinion as to whether or not she'll be able to carry to term."

"Oh, well, actually I'm in Germany."

"You can't get email in Germany?"

"Of course I can." Addison sighs deeply and then downs the rest of her drink in one gulp. They've been on the phone for not even a whole minute and she can already feel Derek getting under her skin. "What I meant was I'm not available to consult on a case."

"I'm not asking you to consult, I'm asking you to look at a patient's records and give me your opinion," Derek replies impatient. "So can I send you the email?"

"Yeah, sure." Addison agrees, almost reluctantly, "but why are you calling me for a second opinion? Seattle has a great Ob-Gyn in Arizona Robbins."

"They do," Derek agrees.

"So why are you calling me?" Addison repeats.

"Addison comes before Arizona in my Contacts."

Addison raises her eyebrows. "Seriously?"

"No, not seriously," he assures her. "I'm keeping the Seattle people out of this that's all and you are the best at what you do and I trust your professional opinion."

Addison appears to mull this over. "At least you still trust me on some level."

"Really? We're going to go there?" Derek asks surprised.

"No."

"Ok, sent the email ... just don't take offense to the 'TO' line."

"What does that mean?"

"It means don't take offense to the 'TO' line."

Addison's eyes narrow. "You still have me in your contacts as the 'Wicked Witch', don't you?"

Derek laughs. "It's nothing personal - I just never got around to changing it."

"You are unbelievable," Addison fumes. "Would it have been better if I had cheated on you with some Joe Schmoe off the street and not someone I cared about?"

"Yeah, you cared so much about him that you didn't go to his funeral."

"Wow ... " Addison winces, feeling as if someone has just let the wind out of her sails.

"You brought this up!"

"You're right I did," she nods her head slowly, "and you're right I didn't go to his funeral."

"I know I'm right - I was there, you weren't."

Addison clears her throat. "Do you want to know why I didn't go to his funeral?"

"Not particularly -"

"I didn't go for the same reason I won't go to your funeral," she says fighting back tears. "It was Mark and you and me and what the three of us represented once upon a time: what could have been and what wasn't. It still gets to me and going to the funeral ... seeing him buried would have just made it so final that we're not those people anymore ... and that's why I won't go to your funeral." She pauses as she wipes away tears. "And along that same vein feel free not to attend my funeral."

"Well, that's big of you!" Derek shakes his head. "But you know what I probably would go to your funeral."

"Why? To make sure the 'Wicked Witch' has been burned at the stake?"

Derek laughs. "That's a great reason to give Meredith for why I would want to attend your funeral," he agrees. "But, no, I'd go because you were once someone who meant a lot to me."

A moment of silence falls between them as they both appear to be remembering the past. Derek finally breaks it. "Did you get the email?"

Addison jolts out of the reverie she was in and looks at her phone. "Yes, I'll call you back in a few."

*END OF FLASHBACK*

"So that's why you weren't at Derek's funeral?" Amelia says wiping away a tear of her own. "I really wanted you there."

"I know you did Mel, but I just couldn't. It was Derek," Addison says wistfully.

"Amelia?" Addison presses, after a few moments of silence.

"I'm okay," Amelia assures her, blinking away a few remaining tears. "So what about this patient?"

"What about her? I looked over the information Derek sent me and called him back to say that I didn't see why she couldn't carry to term."

"His charting ends at five months. Do you know why?" Amelia continues. "I mean if she carried to term or ... " she recalls her conversation with Meredith, "or even seven months, why would his charting stop at five months?" Amelia sighs. "Did you talk to Derek again after this?"

"About this case, no. And I have to go, Amelia, I have an early meeting in the morning and I need to get some sleep."

Amelia suddenly remembers that Addison said she was in Atlanta and asks what she's doing there. Addison explains she serves on the board of a new Pediatrics-related center there. She tells Amelia she'll call her when she gets back to Los Angeles and hangs up, then, looking at her watch, types out a text and hits send. She slides down on the loveseat and closes her eyes.

Derek raises his eyebrows in surprise as Amelia hangs up the phone. "Huh, she obviously didn't tell her about the second phone call," he realizes.

Juxaposition of scenes: Meredith sitting on her bed, looking at a picture of her, Christina, Alex, Izzie, and George. She sighs. Bailey in her office, looking out the window, holding Derek's phone in her hand. Owen leaves the desk lamp on and goes into the bedroom. Amelia stares at the chart in the file.

Addison opens her eyes. "Great, now I can't sleep because I'm thinking about Derek." She sighs, rolling over onto her back. She runs her hand through her hair. "I only told her about the first phone call ... Should I have told her about the second?"

"Hey, I tried waiting up for you," Owen says, looking out onto the runway. He, Nathan, and Alex are at the airport, but their flight has been delayed due to an early morning Seattle soaker. Airport officials seem to think it's going to be a fast-moving storm. Nathan and Alex have gone to get something to eat.

"I know," Amelia says apologetically, as she stretches her legs out and props them onto her desk. "I just ended up crashing on my not-too-comfortable office couch."

"Did you make any inroads?"

"No." She continues tiredly, stifling a yawn. "I talked to Addison. It seems Derek consulted her, but he didn't tell her who the patient was or why he was involved with the case."

"Hmm...sorry," Owen says distractedly.

Amelia opens her eyes. "You okay?" she asks her husband.

"Yeah, no, I'm fine. It's just ..."

"It's just what?"

Owen pauses before answering. He looks around to make sure he's alone, well, as alone as one can be in an airport. "Why did you ask about Izzie Stevens?"

"No reason," she says taken aback. "Mer mentioned that she and Derek had argued about her four years ago and then got all weird about it. I thought maybe they had some kind of falling out."

"Well, like I said last night, not that I know of, but it just got me thinking."

"About?"

"About the fact no one has seen or heard from her since she left."

"So?"

"So, she was really sick five-and-a-half years ago. Stage 4 Melanoma that had spread to the brain."

Amelia's eyes widen. "And she lived?"

"Yeah, I mean it was touch and go there for awhile, but your brother and Christina are just that good."

Amelia rolls her eyes. She, of course, knows how good Derek was - he was a freakin' Miracle Worker, almost God-like. She didn't know Owen's ex-wife Christina personally, but she did know she was a topnotch doctor. She could respect that - she just hated when Owen spoke of his ex with such respect and admiration.

"Where are you going with this honey?" she asks trying to sound nonchalant about it.

"I'm not sure," Owen admits honestly. "I just think it's weird that Izzie never got in touch with anyone after leaving Seattle."

"Do you think she got sick again? Maybe that's what Der and Mer were arguing about in regards to her four years ago?" Amelia suggests.

"No," Owen shakes his head resolutely, "If Derek knew Izzie's cancer had recurred, he would have told us, or at the very least Bailey and Webber."

"I don't know what to tell you," Amelia demurs. She could hear in her husband's voice that he was clearly bothered by this, but she didn't want him dwelling on it, in part because of the Christina reference, so she changes the subject. "With your flight delayed, you're not going to make your meeting."

"Got a text late last night - meeting's been pushed back to 4 p.m."

"Okay." Her pager starts beeping wildly. "Sorry, gotta go ... Call me later!"

She looks down at her pager, which is still flashing. She hits it and it stops. "I got a page from this number yesterday too," she mulls, "but I don't know what it is." She picks up her cell and dials the number flashing on her screen.

The scene switches to Bailey in her office. She's scrolling through Derek's contacts. "You wouldn't have used her name, Shepherd, so what did you put it under?"

Amelia taps her fingers impatiently on the desk as the phone rings. On the third ring, someone picks up. "Greenleaf Cemetery."

"I'm sorry, where is this?" she asks stunned.

"Greenleaf Cemetery."

"Sorry, wrong number," she offers and quickly disconnects. She looks at the number again on her pager, punching the numbers on her cell phone's dial pad. It answers on the first ring.

"Greenleaf Cemetery."

"Okay, so not a wrong number," Amelia says more to herself. She clears her throat. "My name is Dr. Amelia Shepherd, I received two pages from this number."

"Not from this number," the man replies as he sorts through paper work on his desk.

"It was from this number," she protests annoyed.

"Well, I didn't page you and nobody else has access to this phone."

Amelia opens her mouth to respond, but changes her mind. "Okay, well, my mistake." She starts to hang up when the man asks her a question that causes her to pause. "What did you just ask me?"

"You said your name is Shepherd ... Are you related to the Dr. Shepherd who's buried here?"

Amelia looks over at Derek's picture. "He's my brother. How did you know he's buried there?"

"I'm the manager, it's my job to know who's buried here."

Amelia isn't amused with the man's flip response. "There are a lot of people buried there, right? Do you know the names of everyone who's buried there off the top of your head?"

"No," the man concedes, wondering why he got into this conversation in the first place.

"Then how do you know my brother off the top of your head?"

"It wasn't that long ago...not even two years, right? And it was big news, I mean he was a hot-shot neurosurgeon wasn't he?"

"He was."

"Plus someone just came to the office the other day to ask for directions to his grave."

"Someone asked for directions to Derek's grave?" Amelia practically jumps up from her chair. "Who?"

"Don't know her name."

"Well, did she say how she knew my brother?"

"Said she was a former patient of his, that she was passing through, and wanted to pay her respects."

"About what time was this?"

"Not sure, early afternoon."

Amelia curses under her breath, realizing that this woman must have been at the cemetery about the same time she received the page the other day - the one she didn't respond to because she didn't recognize the number and instead went to get coffee with Owen.

"Yeah, she was here a good while," the man continues. "I think about three hours."

"Three hours?" Amelia gasps. "That's a long time to spend at a grave or even a cemetery for that matter."

"Some people find cemeteries relaxing," the man replies, clearly offended.

Amelia rolls her eyes. She sits on the edge of her desk. "I'm just saying that's a long time to spend at her former doctor's grave."

"His wasn't the only grave she visited."

"How do you know that?"

"Because she asked for directions to other people's graves too."

"Really, who?" Amelia's interest piques up. She picks up Patient C's file.

"That I don't remember off the top of my head, she came back in after she initially left to ask for their directions." The man moves the mouse to the computer and clicks on a file 'Directions'. "Oh, yeah, here it is... Dr. Alexandra Grey and Dr. Mark Sloan."

"Lexie and Mark?" Amelia's mouth drops open in surprise. She looks back down at the file. "Why would someone who's never been to the cemetery before suddenly show up to visit their graves?"

"I didn't say she'd never been to the cemetery before," the man interrupts.

"But she needed directions to their graves."

The man shrugs. "That just means she hasn't been to your brother's and the others' graves before, it doesn't mean she hasn't been to the cemetery before."

"So, you've seen her there before?"

"Not in a really long time."

"How long is 'not in a really long time'?"

"I don't know, maybe six-seven years. She used to come all the time to visit her fiancé's grave," he explains, then anticipating Amelia's next question, "and, no, I don't recall the name of her fiancé."

"That's a long time," Amelia agrees, "and yet you seem to remember her very clearly. Why?"

"I have a photographic memory," the man smirks. Amelia rolls her eyes. The man senses her lack of enthusiasm for his humor. "Okay, the reason I remember her is because one time my scarf dropped on the ground and got ruined when it was driven over by a funeral procession and she knitted me a new one. She also occasionally brought me in homemade bread."

"And you never got her name?" Amelia asks incredulous. "I mean she brought you homemade bread and knitted you a scarf. You never got a name, not even a first name!"

"Actually, I did get a first name, but I don't remember it. It was a weird name, almost like a nickname. Began wit think."

Amelia takes a deep breath. "This is really important. Please, please try and remember."

The scene returns to Bailey, who is pacing back and forth in her office. "What would you have put the name under, Shepherd?"

*FLASHBACK*

Derek is sitting in a car talking on his cell phone. "Cricket? I mean what kind of name is Cricket anyway?"

*END OF FLASHBACK*

Bailey's eyes widen as she grabs Derek's phone off her desk.

*FLASHBACK*

"Well, look who's up and moving around?" he tells somebody on the phone. "Little Miss Sunshine or should I say Little Miss Cricket?"

*END OF FLASHBACK*

"C-R- " Bailey murmurs. A name pops up.

Amelia taps her foot impatiently. "Chris something. Actually, no, Cre...crick...Crick...et. Yeah that was it, Cricket!" the man offers.

"Cricket?" Amelia repeats disbelieving. "What kind of name is Cricket?"

Scene flashes to Bailey. "Cricket, of course ... " she sighs relieved.

Amelia plops back down in her chair. "I can't believe this woman was there at the cemetery and I missed her," she bemoans, putting her head down on her desk.

"If you hurry, you might be able to catch her."

"What?" Amelia gasps, lifting her head slightly. "She's there now!"

"Yeah, I saw her drive by right before you called."

Scene flashes to a woman standing in front of a grave. The rain is still coming down, but it doesn't seem to bother her. She kneels down and runs her hand over the headstone, and places something in front of it. She stands and takes a deep breath. As she turns to leave, the scene pans across the vast cemetery. Derek can be seen leaning against a tree, watching her.

Amelia jumps up - "You didn't think to mention this sooner?" she hisses - and grabs her coat and briefcase.

"You didn't ask."

"Ugh!" Amelia slams down her phone. She puts on her coat, looking over to Derek's picture as she does. "Okay, Derek, let's go find Cricket."