"Ah Sammy that was the suckiest story I've ever heard! You're such a girl!" Sam made his Bitch face and Dean just rolled his eyes.
"Samuel is not a girl. However Lucy is." Dean jumps in the air and swears,
"Damn it Cas! Warn a guy before you do that Angel thing!"
"Wait what? Who's Lucy, Castiel?" Sam asks confused.
"Who's Lucy?" Sam just nods at Cas.
"Is she you're girlfriend Cas?" Dean mocks the angel. Cas's head tilts to the side.
"No, Lucy is Lucifer. I thought you knew this?" Cas just watches as both men do a face plant wondering what was wrong with the humans.
"Uh what the fuck?" Was Dean's helpful reply.
"So is the story of Lucifer's fall wrong then?" Sam asked the angel. A nod and Cas asks,
"Would you like to hear the true version?"
"Of course Cas! I mean how the Hell did anybody get that wrong?"
"I heard it was because the Church thought that a woman could not be the Devil. A lot of the books of the Bible are missing or modified actually. You humans are very prejudiced towards women." Was Cas's answer. Dean shakes his head while Sam rolls his eyes.
"Figures," they both mutter.
"I heard this story from Uriel, who heard it from Zachariah, who heard it from Raphael, who heard it from Gabriel, who heard it from Michael himself. Would you like to hear it?" Dean and Sam both respond in the positive and Cas settles himself on the mattress beside Dean, getting ready to tell the tale he heard from the other Angels.
"It was one day when the Earth was new. I was not born at the time you see, which is why I've only ever heard of this story. Lucifer was in a foul mood, which was uncommon to say the least. Usually Lucifer was one of the best natured of the angels. She was storming through the Heavens screeching for Michael. I heard she left a wake of destruction in her wake. Poor Johpiel was thrown into the lake. Before she found Michael however, she ran into God. He apparently asked her how she was doing and then she cussed him out in front of the whole Host. He got madder and madder and then cast her out of Heaven."
"So how did the other angels fall then?" Dean rolls his eyes at Sam.
"Obviously they were the angels that were in her garrison and were loyal to her Sammy." Cas and Sam just look at Dean with wide eyes. Sam shakes his head and asks,
"So why was she so upset then?" Cas shrugs and Dean scoffs.
"She was preggers Sam, I mean come on everybody knows this besides the Cherubs." Cas's mouth had fallen open. His head cocked to the side and his stare was starting to annoy Dean.
Suddenly Dean's face paled and he yells,
"What the crap does she want Sammy for then?" Cas just gives Dean 'the look' and Dean passes out. Sam looks between Dean's fallen form and Cas. Cas shrugs and responds to Sam's look with,
"You're brother has a dirty mind Samuel." Cas stands up and with a blink of an eye he is gone.
Cas reappears in front of Gabriel and says,
"You owe me thirty bucks." Gabriel pulls a bitch face that reminds Cas of a certain human, but shrugs it off pocketing the money. He makes to leave and then tilting his head to the side he asks,
"Was the reason that Lucifer fell because she was pregnant?" Gabriel jumps and mutters,
"See ya later Cassy!" before disappearing.
"Perhaps I should ask Raphael then? Or perhaps I can find Michael? He's been missing for several years. Not as long as Father, but he has been missing for a while."Cas shrugs and then disappears in a flurry of feather as well.
