Disclaimer: I DO NOT ,I REAPEAT, DO NOT OWN TWILIGHT NOR WILL I EVER.
Am I better off dead?
Am I better off a quitter?
I slouched back in my chair. I've been inside for weeks. The outside reminds me of Bella. I miss her. The one idiotic fight we had ended our relationship. I'm so lost without her. I think I should throw myself off a bridge, or quit dating, whatever cures my pain the fastest.
"Dude, you have to get over her, there's so many other women out there," Jasper said grabbing out my chair. Bella was made for me, I don't want any women, I want her.
"Bella was like a little sister to me, but when you came home pissed off about work you had to take it out on poor little Bella. It's your fault. Besides, you still have your looks," Emmett said.
"Let's go get a drink for poor little Eddie," Jasper said childishly.
"You both can suck it," I said as they pushed me out the door.
They say I'm better off now
Than I ever was with her
As they take me to my local down the street
I'm smiling but I'm dying trying not to drag my feet
"Your better off now without Bella," Emmett said.
"Yeah you are, I don't how long I could go without my Alice. I would drive me cra-," Jasper stopped.
"Jasper," Emmett hissed.
"Be happy your single," Jasper said. I smiled, but I'm dying inside. I tried not to drag my feet.
They say a few drinks will help me to forget her
But after one too many I know that I'm never
Only they can't see where this is gonna end
They all think I'm crazy but to me it's perfect sense
"Drink it up and maybe you'll get lucky," Emmett said reassuringly.
"I'll have two Tequlia shots," I said. A women came over to me and sat in my lap.
"Hey sweetie, I'm Lauren and you are?," Lauren asked seductively.
"Not Interested"
"But-"
"I'm not interested"
"Fine," Lauren huffed. She got up and walked away.
"Dude, what wrong with you?" Emmett asked.
"You need more drinks?," Jasper asked.
"No. I'm not interested nor will I ever be." I yelled. They don't get it.
:::::...::::...::::...:::...:::...::::...:::
And my mates are all there trying to calm me down
'Cause I'm shouting your name all over the town
I'm swearing if I go there now
I can change her mind turn it all around
"BELLA! BELLA!," I shouted. I punched the wall. I'm pretty sure there's a hole in it, but who gives a shit.
"Calm down," Emmett said.
"I need her," I sobbed.
"BELLA!" If I run to Bella's she probably will take me back. I'm lost without her. I have to change her mind and turn it all around.
And I know that I'm drunk but I'll say the words
And she'll listen this time even though they're slurred
Dialed her number and confessed to her
I'm still in love but all I heard
Was nothing
I called her.
"Hello?"
"Bella...I l-l-love you and I m-miss you come back please.I... can't...stand daywithout you.I'm sorry."
"It still doesn't change things," She hung up.
"Bella!" I sobbed. I know I'm drunk and I love her. That's all that matters.
::::...:::...:::..:::...::::...::::...::::
So I stumble there, along the railings and the fences
I know if I faced her face, that she'll come to her senses
Every drunk step I take leads me to her door
If she sees how much I'm hurting, she'll take me back for sure
"Emmett and Jasper you can go home I'm going to Bella's."
"Are you sure?"
"Completely!"
"Alrightie, Then." They both walked away.
I stumbled along the fences of her neighboor's houses'. If I see her face I know she'll take me back. I drunk step will lead me to her door. I'm hurting so much, I want her to take me back.
I stumbed up to her door and knocked. She immediately answered it.
"Edward, what are you doing here?" she asked annoyed
"I missed you" I slurred.
"Your drunk," she noticed.
"I know."
And my mates are all there trying to calm me down
'Cause I'm shouting your name all over the town
I'm swearing if I go there now
I can change her mind turn it all around
Bella called Emmett to get me out of there. There was a heated fight between her 'boyfriend' and and I.
"BELLA! I LOVE YOU!" I shouted.
"PLEASE TAKE ME BACK!,"
"I can't live without you" I whispered as Emmett stuffed me in the car.
::::...::::...::::...::::...::::...::::...::::
And I know that I'm drunk but I'll say the words
And she'll listen this time even though they're slurred
Dialed her number and confessed to her
I'm still in love but all I heard
Was nothing
I was back in the safety of my home so I won't 'be somebodys' bitch' as Emmett puts it.
I drunk a few beers. It gets me in the modd for calling drunken state is the most truthful.
"'Ello?"
"Bella, will you pretty please with a cherry on top, take me back'" Desperate times calls for desperate measures.
She sighed and hung up.
Nothing.
She said nothing
Oh, I wanted words but all I heard was nothing
Oh, I got nothing
Oh, I got nothing
Oh, I wanted words but all I heard was nothing
Doesn't she want me back? I've apologized over a thousand times. I still get no reponse. I'm starting to think she's getting tired of me calling her and begging. If I was her I'd take me back.
Ohh, sometimes love's intoxicating
Ohh, you're coming down, your hands are shaking
When you realize there's no one waiting
**Flashback**
The fight was 3 days ago. Bella moved in with her old friend Jacob. I hate him. I've been waiting for her to call me back.
I voicemailed her alot. I filled up her box in 2 hours. I should stop spamming her. I know she probably won't wait for me. Maybe, Jake has been waiting this to happen. She's not comming back.
**End of Flashback**
Am I better off dead?
Am I better off a quitter?
They say I'm better off now
Than I ever was with her
I had Emmett and Jasper on 3-way.
"I can't get over her Guys. It hurts," I sobbed.
"Fuckin' suck it up. I'm getting tired of your lame ass excuses. Bella's got over you. After all you brung this on your self. Suck it up and go get I make myself clear?" Emmett said sternly.
"Yeah, you were better without her. She was killing your mojo," Jasper added.
And my mates are all there trying to calm me down
'Cause I'm shouting your name all over the town
I'm swearing if I go there now
I can change her mind turn it all around
"Dude you have to get off the phone, if you keep shouting like that. It's the 14th time you did it this week." Jasper said.
"I need to change her mind. I have to fix it!"
"That's it I'll be over in less than five minutes to kick your ass."
And I know that I'm drunk but I'll say the words
And she'll listen this time even though they're slurred
Dialed her number and confessed to her
I'm still in love but all I heard
Was nothing
I dialed her number, she answered.
"Bella?" She hung up on me...
Still nothing.
She said nothing
Oh, I wanted words but all I heard was nothing
Oh, I got nothing
I got nothing
I wanted words but all I heard was nothing
Ohh I got nothing
I wan't her to answer me, answer my questions. Why? I know I was stupid. I regret that. She filed a restraining order against me. I'd give anything to see her face again. Nothing compares to her beauty. I never get an answer.
I got nothing
[August 13, 2011]
It's over. I'm drawing blank.
[A/N]: Review, Favorite, What ever you do it's better with a friend like you! My first Fanfiction! Horray!
