Authors note: Ok so, this is my first fanfic that is written for my friend that has inspired me to do it with the our SolKar RPs. I would Like to thank Lauren for that. Well I am planning to have some Lemon's in the much later chapters, though I will be sure to give a beforehand warning to those who do not want to read that. Excuse me for any spelling mistakes but I am going to try my best at that. The Story will be from Karkat's point of view just to clarify that.
No Homestuck or the characters don't belong to me, if they did it would end up a Yaoi / Yuri story . Or some kind of smut hehehe.
Darkness, silence and peace. Good, that's exactly what I needed after such a long and tiring day. I lay on my bed in the middle of the night as usual unable to sleep, I can't remember the last time I slept a full eight hours or anything near that. Not only my mental state was now showing the tiredness but over the dreamless years and dull nights filled with nothing other than negative thoughts, my body showed it too. No one asked about the dark shadows under my eyes anymore, everyone assumed it was just how I was. My paleness was nothing out of the normal either. Finally those fuck asses left me and my life alone.
I sighed heavily and sat up letting the gray bed sheets slide down my body and rest in my lap, my eyes that were a matching color looked towards the window without expression, I found that funny , my eyes were gray and my favorite color was gray...now...my world was gray too...without a future. They stayed there for awhile looking at the clouded night sky before they picked a new place to lay their gaze upon. The white envelope that had a piece of paper sticking out of it. I felt like the cursed paper was calling me, forcing me to come and look at it once more, glaring at me with its contents as it laughed at my life. I got up, my bare feet hitting the wooden floor letting the chill of the night brush over my near bare skin, I was wearing nothing more than a pair of black boxers. My feet made soft tapping sounds on the floor boards as I walked towards the only thing that I could see at the moment, the envelope that contained my sadly ending fate. My hand gripped the edge of the envelope and I turned around turning on the night light on the bed side table, sitting down on the soft mattress that seemed to try and comfort me though right now I didn't see the point. It's efforts were wasted.I brushed over the envelope with my finger tips my eyes looking at it still dull and expressionless as if the contents of this envelope had no meaning. But it was quiet the opposite in fact, I pulled out the paper and looked at the contents.
Karkat Vantas
24/8/13
Mr Vantas we are writing this letter to inform you that your general blood tests have been done and results are ready but have also showed up with a few major concerns. Please contact the hospital or your doctor as soon as possible to get more information as it crucial you and your parent/carer speak to your doctor and about these results.
That was the start of all this suffering of mine but that letter I received in the mail last week, Signless or dad... after life and the life of the rest of my family.I smiled at this letter that I thought back then was over them over exaggerating I threw the letter from last week onto the floor and let it float in the air for a moment before it his the next letter was the one that runined my hopes for any future, I touched it scanning over it till my eyes stopped on the one sentence that marked my fate
We are sorry to inform you that your cancer results have been positive diagnosing you with Acute Lymaphoblastic Leukemia.
My fingers went back and forth over the sentence, this letter arrived in the post last night and today I had talked to my doctor today after he had calmed down the panicked nurse who was pitying me way too much because of my young age, yeah I was 15 nearly 16 so she kept on telling me how sorry she was such a young person would have to be put through this. The best reaction though belonged to my Older brother though Kankri, when he saw the letter he just stared at me in disbelieve his mouth hanging open while he shook his head slowly hos eyes filled with tears. He got so emotional already sealing my fate of death. Dad...dad didn't know what to say, he left right after reading the letter saying he had to go for a walk. I found it amusing though, I was the only calm one just shrugging with a sigh when I read this. I guess I never valued my own life much. Though my calmness bothered even me, I almost felt happy...Happy to know my life was meaningless. I had always thought that, saw myself as nothing more than scum to this planet. But to be almost relieved about this? Kankri asked me why I was smiling at the time. I didn't know ...
I grip the edge of the paper tight, causing it to bend and make valleys I did it again before I just scrunched it up and threw the whole envelope in the bin. The leaflets on how to deal with Cancer fell out of it and ended up in the bin separately. I was still dulled, numb, unsure why and it bothered me. Shouldn't I be panicked? Crying? Screaming and begging for a cure? I should, but I was perfectly calm and numb about all this, I could easily sit down and talk about my cancer as if I didn't have it. But I did ask my family for one thing, my health, my cancer is to stay among us. I don't want anyone to know, I wouldn't want people to be nice or fake to me just because of pity or something. I much prefered If nothing changed for as long as possible though eventually people would notice I vanish often and I get worse , still I was planning to keep this silence till I had to spill it or it spilled it's self.
I sighed again and got up from the bed, leaving my room without a care in the world. My doctor told me that I had 50/50 chances of surviving, they would have been better chances if my cancer was in the earlier stage but I expected this with my shitty luck. I already knew my life would be over before my next summer holidays Acute Lymaphoblastic Leukemia or ALL Leukemia spread fast without treat mean a person lived a few months at best. I wasn't the lucky type so I already guessed it would be all over within a year. I strode to the kitchen and opened the fridge , taking the cold remains of Pizza from the fridge and nibbling on the slice , Might as well enjoy the short life I would have right? I thought before grabbing a glass of cold Cola on the way back to my room. I ate the slice before I even reached the door which left me with just the Cola. I sipped on it while getting into my room, I never turned on the lights in any places at night, I enjoyed the dark I got this peaceful feeling when all the lights were gone. Climbing back into my bed I sat down and finished the glass of the cool liquid before putting it on the bed side table. I lay back down to my original pose looking at the ceiling before my eyes out of interest turned towards the clock that glowed in red marking the time as 4:30 am. I shook my head knowing I would have to get up for school in a few hours, I rolled onto my side facing away from the wall as my eyes shut, my body curling up into a tight ball under the warmth of the blankets and comfort of the dark letting me at last get some rest. I fell into deep and dreamless sleep that as always didn't last long.
I can see the flickers
Over me the lanterns raised
Lift me up, Lift me over it
Show me what you're Hidding
That is the first chapter, I know it's only a little happening here but it's the intro those are usually sucky, but I hope people will still read this and give me reviews. They will be appreciated 3 I will update as soon as I can . C:B
