The Redeemed Knight
Disclaimer- I do not own any of the characters in this story.
Chapter 1- Hollow Victory
Lehon/Rakata Prime
1 day after the destruction of the Star Forge
I'm friends with the monster,
that's under my bed.
Get along with the voices inside of my head
- Eminem, Monster
The soldiers had celebrated all night and into the early morning. There had been victory speeches. There had been award ceremonies. They had praised him as a hero. The Prodigal Knight they called him. Their savior. Revan sat on the cliff overlooking the beach. He had to get away from it all. Everyone he saw looked at him like he was a god. It had been just a year ago that he had been on the other side. Although he didn't remember his reign as Darth Revan, Dark Lord of The Sith, it didn't mean he hadn't done it. It didn't mean that all the innocent people he had killed were forgotten. It didn't mean that all the families that he had torn apart would be ok. It didn't mean that all the children that had to grow up without a father or mother or maybe even both would be just fine. Everything that he had done couldn't just be forgotten. He didn't deserve to be called a hero. He didn't deserve to have people look up to him. In his opinion he didn't even deserve to live. The Jedi council should have never allowed him a second chance. Sure he had saved the Republic, but at what cost? He now had to live his life looking at all of his past mistakes. Reliving all the horrors that he had committed. The council had told Bastila that his memories would never return, that he would never remember his past. They had been wrong, but what's new there. He could now never sleep no more than three hours a night without relieving his old memories. The horrors that he had done kept him up most nights. He had truly been a monster. Before he had know of his old life he had thought that the memories where just strange dreams or the force giving him visions. Sometimes they were so bad that he would go days without sleep. But that didn't matter, he was a hero now right? Or was he? Deep down was he still the monster that had killed millions if not billions? Deep down inside him was Darth Revan still there, waiting to come back? Or was he now The Redeemed Prodigal Knight Revan, hero of the Republic, and servant of the light? Or was a somewhere in between a servant of neither the light nor the dark? He didn't know.
"It is a beautiful view isn't it Knight Revan." Master Vander said walking up, "Do you mind if I take a seat beside you?"
Revan slowly shook his head slowly in shock, "No not at all Master". He had been caught up in his own thoughts that he hadn't noticed the tiny Master walk up and take a spot beside him. Revan turned his head back to look at the beach. They sat in silence for about five minutes. It made Revan uneasy, but he quickly masked the emotion not wanting to let on to Vander.
"Something troubles you Revan, what is it?" Vander said finally breaking the silence. Revan turned to look at the small Master. When he had went to the enclave after Taris, Vander was the one Master, other than his teacher Master Zhar, that he had the most respect for.
"It's nothing Master." Revan said lying right through his teeth.
Vander chuckled a little bit, "Revan you must take me for a wrinkled up fool if you expect me to believe that."
"Master you are one of the view masters that I respect, and I would never think of you as a fool it's just that I-"
"You don't think I would understand." Vander finished for him.
Revan looked back to the beach. It truly was a beautiful sight. The amber sun was setting off in the distance, causing the water to reflect its dying glow.
Vander sighed as followed his gaze, "Revan, you were one of our greatest pupils. You were the very definition of what a Jedi was supposed to be. So many of the younger students looked up to you. You were what all of them strived to be. In all sense of the word you were a perfect young Jedi. All be it you were a little headstrong but what young Knight isn't." Vander chuckled, "You created so many followers without even knowing it. You were a living celebrity among the Jedi. Heck you even had some of the Masters won over. But among all of this you followed the light. You did what you thought was right, and most of the time it was. You didn't let your fame among the students get to you. When the Mandalorian Wars came you were certain that we needed to fight. You thought you knew best, and without heading the council's word of warning you took all the Jedi that had come to look up to you out to war to save the Republic. After the war I'm not sure what happened but the Revan that returned was not the same Revan that had been the orders most promising Knight. The Revan that returned was changed. He was not the same young Knight who stood for light. The Revan that came back was a brainwashed fool who stood for the darkside. He was an essence of evil."
"Master," Revan said butting in "I'm sorry but what's the point of this. I know that when I came back that I... I was not right."
"My point is," Vander said continuing, "that the Revan that returned wasn't the real Revan. I don't know what you found on the Outer Rim, but when you returned you weren't you. Whatever you found out there changed you, and it wasn't for the better."
"Master, are you saying that when me and Malak went out there that we didn't turn willingly. That... that there was something out there that changed us?" Revan asked.
"Like I said Revan I don't know what happened out there, I wasn't there, but maybe one day the answer will come." Vander said looking out into the distance.
Revan joined his gaze looking out over the ocean. The sun was starting to set now and it was getting darker.
The tiny Master stood up, "Come Knight Revan let us go back. I'm sure you have a certain Padawan waiting on you." With that the two walked back. Revan's head was spinning. What or who had been out there that had changed him and Malak. Then a terrifying thought came to him, if there was something out there was it still there.
Fin.
A/N: So what do you think? This is my first ever fanfic and I've always loved the story of Kotor so I decided it would be perfect for my first one. In the canon you never really get that much about what happened after the Jedi Civil War so I thought I might try my hand at it. So please review and tell me how I did. I'll try to make the second chapter as fast as I can but school is about to start so it might be slow. Again thanks for reading.
