"Okay, everypony!" announced Pinkie Pie. "The auditions for the Wizard of Oz are open!"

It was a few months after she had put on Les Miserables, and Pinkie Pie was just itching to do a new show! She had chosen one that didn't need any censoring this time and was sure that it would be another hit. Twilight was relieved, as this time she didn't have to worry about Pinkie messing up great works of literature, nor did she have to worry about the moral safety of the little fillies. No, everything was just fine this time.

Rarity took the stage first at the head of the line of auditioning ponies.

"Hello, darling," Rarity said happily to Pinkie Pie. "I'm here to audition for the role of Dorothy. I feel that I can relate to her. A smalltown girl living in a lonely world, wanting more than what life had given her. Not that I'm complaining, of course."

"Okie-dokie-lokie!" cried Pinkie Pie happily. "Just sing whatever you want for me!"

Rarity cleared her throat and began to sing. She didn't mind all the other ponies watching her. In fact, she liked being the center of attention.

(To the tune of "Think of Me")

Rarity: Di-a-monds

Lovely and shining

Nothing can beat their glow

Di-a-monds

I can't help pining

There's nothing better I know

I value my family and my friends

Above everything else indeed

But whenever I see diamonds

My heart takes the lead

(BIG ORCHESTRAL BURST OUT OF FREAKIN' NOWHERE!)

I value love and value friendship, too

But I honestly must confess

Whenever I see di-a-monds

I feel truly blessed

I love to look in

And see myself back

There are many things

I admit I lack

But...

Di-a-monds

I'm never lacking

I cannot get enough

Di-a-monds

I adore stacking

Them up with what I love

There's so much in the world

That I do love

And on that list, diamonds are high

Be them red or green

Or turquoise

Or blue as the sky

(WHOA! THE ORCHESTRA JUST CAME BACK!)

Up in the rafters, a mysterious pony looked down on Rarity. He was dressed completely in black and wore a mask that covered the upper half of his face.

Mysterious Pony: Never have

I heard a voice like...

Bravo!

Rarity, my precious Rarity

Coming out here I won't regret

She may not know of me now but

She'll know of me yet

Rarity: I value my family and my friends

Above everything else indeed

But whenever I see diamonds

My heart takes the lead

The ponies cheered, along with Spike who had come to see the audition. He couldn't get enough of Rarity's beautiful voice. Or her beautiful anything, for that matter.

Pinkie Pie smiled. She knew she couldn't tell Rarity there and then that she had the part of Dorothy, but she certainly had a good chance.

Rarity looked up towards the rafters, thinking that she heard somepony stomping his hooves in approval from above. But she saw nopony. Perhaps it was only her imagination.


Here's chapter one! I'm not sure I'm completely satisfied with Rarity's song, but the original one is quite pretty. I'm not a huge Phantom fan, I must confess, but it's the kind of show that's just begging to be spoofed. With ponies! It starts out kind of slow, but it will pick up! I think.