Forewarning: This has been known to make people cry. Carry on.
He-he couldn't be gone.
Big Brother Cooper, who defended Blaine when he came out, who got him out of trouble, he was gone. It's one thing when you don't know, but when you see for yourself, you'll think you'll gain closure but it doesn't happen every time. Blaine would have rather find him dead rather than…undead. Ignorance would have been bliss here. If he didn't see his brother, things would have been better. He would have rather been kept in the dark than finding his brother as a mindless, flesh eating thing.
His memories came back in his sleep tonight, once he got to sleep. Many Christmases and birthdays, with Cooper being the only one getting Blaine gifts he wanted, and not what his parents thought he wanted. Other remarkable memories came to mind, but each one ended with lovable Cooper turning into a shambler. His last dream for the night was the worst. It was just Blaine and Cooper. They were facing each other. Both were unusually still, staring at each other. Cooper was a zombie, but not coming towards him. He lifted his arm and just waved to Blaine. As if to say goodbye. "No! Don't go" Blaine shouted, racing towards his brother who was disappearing into the night. The farther he ran, the more his older brother disappeared and no matter how far or fast he ran, he wasn't fast enough to give him one more hug goodbye. One final hug, so Blaine could live better knowing that his brother not suffering anymore.
That's when he woke up, crying into Kurt's chest. He didn't gather his surroundings right away. All he knew was that he was gripping soft material that smelled familiar but he was ruining it with his tears and mucus. He could feel warm hands rubbing up and down his back slowly, trying to calm him down. When the "hush, shhh" came to his ears, Blaine opened his eyes and suddenly remembered where he was. Kurt was holding him in their bed. Blaine was curled up in himself against his boyfriend. He kept sobbing, into Kurt's chest and almost hyperventilating. His dreams mixed with his memories. Every happy memory that tried to enter his mind was brutally interrupted by a groaning monster that looked like his older brother but wasn't.
His mourning turned to anger. He let his death grip from Kurt's shirt go and started punching his chest. Not out of anger towards Kurt, no. He was upset and frustrated that his brother was like that. "Why-why, Kurt? Why him, why?" He'd lost his brother. He knew there was an experimental cure, but he could tell (and hated to admit it) that his brother was too far gone. It wouldn't work on him. Blaine knew his brother would never return to a semi-normal state of humanity. "He's gone, Kurt" he whispered pathetically, losing all hope.
