Just another crappy birthday for me since my mother has plans tonight, probably giving out hand jobs at an ally where all the prostitutes stayed it. She never cares about me or my sweet sixteen she only cares about her former boyfriend in which actually believes he was in love with her and give anything to make her feel safe and worthy. She's too goddamn gullible to fall for his scams. I wish she can see that he is indeed scandal con artist who manipulates single women's by faking his true indignity. Maybe someday she will know behind her so-called boyfriend when she has the chance to do it.

All my friends was busy or probably going to this new bitch snotty rich girl, Vanessa Robison birthday party instead coming to see me or even text me on my cell. I fucking hate that fake French accent whore so much that I could kick her square in the balls…even though she doesn't have one. Ever since she moved here all the guys already started to asked her on a date (yuck! I wouldn't date a skank like her) and of course those sluttly girls asked her to be their friend and crap like that, even Stan's hippie bitch invited her to a slumber party. I am so glad I don't have a slut whore girlfriend. They always lied to your face and bitch all the fucking time that's why I'm into guys now. No one knows that I liked….boys when I was nine years old where I used to play with my stuffed animals, wearing my mom's make-ups and looking at gay pornos on the internet. I felt so ashamed sometimes when I do dress in drags just to get women clothes and other materials from the department, it just that I feel comfortable wearing dresses, miniskirts and tight shirt. My life sucks so much right now.

It's been hours and hours and no one I haven't called, not even that Jesus-killer Jew. I hate him so much every inch of my body. He's the one why I'm acting like a total fag, he's the one putting me in pain and suffering. I hate him so much and yet…..I fucking love him.

Kyle Broflovski always has been my enemy ever since we were in diapers and we still continuing hating each other guts. He hated me and I hated him and that's how we roll when we hang out with the guys. In other occasions, we do get along just fine from Stan and Kenny's absents, but there's something different in our—

KNOCK KNOCK

"What the hell?" I cursed out softly, wiping slight warm tears away from me cheeks as I got up from the sofa and walk directly towards the door by unlocking the locks. When I open the door my heart beats really fast that I could easily have a heart attack right now. It was Kyle…..holding a present.

Why would he bring me a present? Isn't it a trap that he simply set up before coming here or couldn't be a Jew poison gas? I have find out for sure.

"Sup, Jew." I said, looking at his gorgeous green eyes like I do every day when we're alone. He is just so perfect!

"Hey, fatass. Happy birthday….my mom wanted me to buy you something; it was her idea so don't try insulting me, fatass! Here!" Kyle rudely pushes the present on my belly and started to walk away. I couldn't let him go off like that. I need him.

I ran directly to him, throwing the present on the porch. For a sneaky Jew he sure can run fast with those scrawny legs and that tight-ass pants makes me wanna squeeze that ass with my hands. God damn his hot tight ass.

"Kahl! Wait up, you godamn, Jew!"

He stopped running as he saw my shadow from the side. I panted heavily while he crossed his arms on his chest. We were standing by the Stotches resistance…..Butters house. As I slide my hair back from sweating of course, Kyle looked around from where he was blushing bright red like beets. I glare at him, giving him a mad look.

"Why'd you ran off like that?" I asked, walking besides him as he started to walk slowly. "I mean what was that about?"

Kyle looked down at his shoes, answering my question. "I….love you."

I rolled my eyes by his respond. "Yeah right, Kahl. Prove it!"

Kyle narrowed his eyebrow. "You want prove?"

"Yeah, Jew. If you don't really mean it just leave me the fuck alon—"

Before I could say anything else, Kyle cupped my chin on his palm as he close his eyes, landing his dry lips into mines as he removes his hand away from me chin as he brings his whole hands around my wrist while I return the kiss, tasting the Jewish favor that I've been longing for. Kyle breathes hotly through his nostril as he slides his tongue inside mines, mostly cleaning my teeth with it. I can't believe this is happening right now. I moan softly by the biting on my tongue while Kyle slightly push me against the gates, pressing his heated body against to mines as he lower his hands on my ass and squeezing tightly. We break off the kiss as saliva came across our lips. Kyle pressed his forehead against mines, wrapping his arms around my neck as he leans towards me right ear, whisper softly. "Happy birthday, fatass."

I smirk. "Thank you, Jew boy and that present you gave me it's a-"

"Boys gone wild: The Sequel. I rented it with my credit card. I knew you will love it."

I smile at his girly figures. "Well, well Kahl. Let's go inside and watched hours of males pounding each other asses and after that maybe we can do a little bit of that action, too." Kyle blushes brightly, moving his red curls from his forehead.

"Okay, but just this once since today is your birthday and all."

I take his hand as we start walking at my house. I lean towards his ear, moving his red curls away from his ear. "Thank you, Kyle. This has to be one of best birthday I've ever had."

Kyle smiles. "No problem. You should've be alone on your birthday, dude. You should have someone to be with you and…I want to be that person."

"You are." I mentioned. "And I thought I would never have someone like you….Jew."

Kyle smirks, swinging our hands back and forth. "Same here….fatass"

This was the day that Kyle and I became a couple after we had sex in my room about nine times until the sun came up. We told everyone at school about our relationship, even Stan who was upset about us being together and telling Kyle that I will abuse him. What a dickhead. And we told Kenny about it he congratulate us by shaking our hands and buy us packs of condom with different flavor scent.

This has to be one of greatest birthday I ever had and hopefully next year Kyle can cook my cake and do all the shopping for me.