Disclaimer: We own next to nothing, everybody from the show isn't ours

A/N Nerwen Aldarion: This idea was cooked up by me when I read my favorite book I'll Take Manhatten, it's a fun and lighthearted fic when it comes to TeylaRonon and I think all of you will crack a smile when you see what I do to them. Needless to say I've always wanted to do a fic like this and I hope you enjoy.

A/N Tinuviel Undomiel: The Shwier part of the story was inspired from the book Night Fire it's going to be a bit angsty for Elizabeth but in the end it shows how strong she really is.


Learning to Grow

Chapter 1: Bad Marriages

On the planet Dilitor, outside the Latorian base, was not the normal place to raise a ten year old girl but to Ashta Dex it was home. The preteen with the attitude of an 18 year old picked up a handful of reports on the table and held them out to her mother who was reading a novel Laura Cadman had loaned her, "Mom you have to finish these reports sometime."

Teyla Emmagen looked up, "I will but I've been so busy with missions."

"Then why don't you do them now?"

She made a face, "I'm leaving the day after tomorrow and you want me to do reports all night?"

"You're right, what was I thinking?" Ashta teased

"You get that from your father."

"What, wanting you to finish your reports?"

Teyla grinned, "No, the no thinking part."

"What does that say about you since you married him?"

"I was temporarily insane."

"And pregnant," her daughter added.

"That too."

A knock from the door made them both direct their attention to it, "Who could that be?" Teyla wondered aloud as she left the couch and answered the door.

The visitor was a tall, beautiful woman with dark, curly brown hair that fell past her shoulders and framed her lovely face. Deep green eyes stared back at her and turned brighter when she smiled, "Hey Teyla."

"Elizabeth?" She asked, surprised to see her long time friend standing in front of her. Quickly she slipped into a friendly embrace and the real question came, "What are you doing here?"

"Can I stay here for…ever?"

Teyla blinked, "Are you serious?'

Elizabeth's shoulders sagged in disappointment, "Is it too much trouble?"

"No, I'm just surprised," Teyla assured her and opened the door, "Come on in," she took the small bag from Elizabeth's arm and reached to grab a second one when she saw there was no other bag. Frowning, she closed the door behind her friend, "Ashta, you remember Elizabeth, right?"

"Yeah," her daughter replied, "But it's been two years."

"Wow, you've grown up so much," Elizabeth remarked.

"I got my Dad's height."

"I can see that."

"Let's take your stuff into the guest room," Teyla said.

Elizabeth gestured to the bag, "I have some money; I can pay rent…"

Teyla shook her head, "I won't hear of it, now come on." She took her hand and dragged Elizabeth to her room. As soon as she entered, Elizabeth lay down on the bed and wrapped her arms around the pillow.

Now Teyla took a good long look at her friend. She was so thin her clothes hung off of her. Her pale skin was now practically ivory white and there were dark circles under her eyes. Those wonderful green eyes were emerald pools full of sadness and pain.

"Silas is dead," Elizabeth informed her to break the silence.

"Really?" Teyla remarked.

She nodded. Silas Gordon, her husband for three years never returned from a mission and left his widow with an excellent settlement and beautiful home on Mandera and she wanted none of it. "I'm finally free," Elizabeth swallowed hard, "He's gone, but I know he's still there. Everywhere I went in that house I could feel him watching me and…and I just couldn't…stay there anymore."

"I understand," she comforted her friend but paused before asking, "What did he do to you, Elizabeth?"

Her reply was to bury her face into the pillow and clutch it tighter until her arms hurt.

Teyla sat down beside her on the bed, "I'm sorry, I can tell it was horrible for you." She said nothing. "He raped you didn't he?"

Finally a response which was a shake of her head, "He couldn't."

Teyla frowned, "Couldn't what?"

"He couldn't rape me, not that he didn't try."

"Are you saying he couldn't…?" Teyla left the sentence hanging and resorted to gestures.

Elizabeth nodded, "He was impotent."

"So you're still a virgin?"

"I don't think I can be called that."

"What do you mean?" Teyla asked.

She closed her eyes at the memories, "I'm tired, Teyla."

"Alright," she said and left the bed, "You can talk to me you know…maybe I can help."

"I don't think anyone can help me anymore," Elizabeth whispered.

She wanted to beg for her to open up and tell her what was wrong. She tried to escape from her husband once two years ago, but five minutes after Teyla had let her inside her home, Silas Gordon had showed up and 'kindly' reminded her that Elizabeth was his wife and escorted her out of the apartment.

Now she was free and Teyla could help but Elizabeth didn't want help. So instead of trying to bully her into talking, Teyla left the room, giving her friend one last glance before closing the door.


Ashta awoke from a wonderful dream about her favorite actor Lathan Simms lying on a towel on the beaches of Wroten wearing swim trunks. She grumbled and tried desperately to cling to her dream world, but the curiosity of what snatched her out of the fantasy won out.

The question was answered when she heard the deep sound of someone moaning coming from the wall to her right: Elizabeth's room.

Groggily, she crawled out of her warm nest of blankets and practically slept walk to see what was going on in her mother's friend's room.

She creaked open the door and saw Elizabeth thrashing around on her and bed and whimpering in fear. Ashta crept into the room and timidly walked up to the bed. The sheets were tangled into knots and sweat glistened across her forehead. Not sure what to do, Ashta reached out and touched her shoulder. Elizabeth screamed, "Silas no!"

That sent Ashta running from the room and bursting into her mother's, "Mom! Mom!"

Teyla opened her eyes reluctantly, "What is it?"

"Something's wrong with Elizabeth."

All traces of sleep fled her body and she practically leapt from the bed and raced to her friend's bedside, "Elizabeth!"

"Silas please stop!" she begged to her dreams, "I'll do whatever you want just don't hurt me anymore!"

"Elizabeth wake up, please," Teyla beseeched her friend still trapped in her nightmare.

"Mom?" Ashta began, a little frightened, "what happened to her?"

Tears brimmed Teyla's eyes, "I don't know," then she turned back to Elizabeth and shook her shoulders, "Elizabeth wake up."

Finally he green eyes flared open wide and she gasped as she darted around looking for her assailant.

"Are you alright?" Teyla asked.

She sucked in a breath before nodding.

"Liar."

"Did I wake you two up?"

"It's no big deal," Ashta assured her.

"I'm so sorry," she sat up in bed, "I didn't mean…"

"You can't avoid it now, Elizabeth," Teyla said, "What did he do to you?"

"I won't wake you up again," She promised them, avoiding the question, "I'm very sorry."

"Elizabeth, tell me what happened."

Her face crumbled and she shook her head, "I can't…I'm sorry…I just can't." she burst into tears and buried her face into the pillow. Teyla lay down beside her and rubbed her shoulder sympathetically, "It'll be alright."

Ashta left the doorway and lay down on Elizabeth's right side. Both mother and daughter stayed to comfort Elizabeth while she sobbed until she fell asleep. They remained there all night knowing that she was in deep pain but could only balm the wound and not close it. That was up to her.


The next morning, Teyla walked bleary eyed out of Elizabeth's room and into the living room. Her daughter was in the kitchen making a pot of coffee. She looked at Ashta with raised eyebrows, "Don't worry this is for me and Elizabeth," her daughter said, "Tea's already heated up on the stove."

"Thank you," she pulled a cup out of the cabinet and poured her morning drink into it, "You all set for school?"

"Yeah," Ashta said, "What are you going to do?"

"Oh the usual, start reports but don't finish them, try to keep peace with Rodney and tell Laura that she gossips too much."

"I mean what are you going to do about Elizabeth?"

Teyla sat down at the table and sighed, "I don't know. I guess all we can do is give her some time to tell us what is wrong."

"Do you have any idea what he might have done to her?" Ashta asked while taking a seat in front of her mother.

"I can imagine how horrible it was, but all I know is that he abused her in someway."

"She really got out of there in a hurry," Ashta commented as she buttered her toast, "She packed nothing more than a few toilette items and an extra change of clothes."

"I noticed," Her mother said, "She really hated him."

"We should take her shopping."

Teyla frowned, "Shopping?"

"If she's going to live with us she'll need more stuff."

"You're right," Teyla said, "and maybe it will help her feel better."

"Shopping always cheers me up," Ashta said with a grin.

The door to Elizabeth's room opened and she walked out into the living room, her eyes puffy from crying last night. "What's going on?"

"How would you like to go shopping with us this afternoon?" Teyla asked.

"That sounds great," she said and then stared at Ashta's breakfast: buttered toast and a soda, "That's what you eat?"
"What's wrong with it?" the ten year old asked.

"Hold on," Elizabeth said and took out various kitchen items and whipped up a batch of scrambled eggs in a few minutes, "Here you go."

Ashta stared at her plate warily then hesitantly took a bite, "Wow, this is delicious!"

"I can see your mother never told you about my culinary skills."

"Only because I can't even boil water," Teyla replied with a smile.

"Got to go," Ashta said after she finished her eggs and grabbed her bag, "Bye mom," she kissed her mother before leaving the apartment.

Teyla got up from the table, "I've got to go to work, but how about we go shopping after Ashta gets out of school?"

"Sounds fine to me."

"Good."

Before she reached her bedroom door, Elizabeth called out, "Teyla," making her turn around to face her, "Thank you for letting me stay and not bullying me about Silas. I know you want to know but I just…want to forget about everything."

"I understand. I'll always be here if you want to talk to me about it."

"I know," Elizabeth said, "You're a good friend Teyla."

She smiled, "Thank you."

"I wish I could have been there more while you and Ronon were going through the divorce."

"It's alright," Teyla assured her, "It was nine years ago, I think I'm fine now."

"But even afterwards Dad wouldn't let me see you, he was afraid I'd get pregnant, married and divorced all within a year like you," Elizabeth explained, "I should have tried harder to see you."

"It doesn't matter now, I have Ashta and she's the best thing that could have ever happened to me," she smiled reassuringly, "I'm gonna get dressed and I'll see you later."

"Okay," Elizabeth said and began to clear the table. It was true that everything turned out okay, but Elizabeth still wished she could have been there.


The market on Dilitor was packed with people as they browsed around for clothes, groceries and other items that they wanted. Teyla, Elizabeth and Ashta walked into the market and threw out suggestions.

"We should look for dresses first," Teyla said.

"No shoes," Ashta recommended.

"Actually let's start with casual wear."

"No wait, there's makeup," he daughter pointed.

"Makeup?" Teyla inquired, "You're ten years old you're not allowed to wear makeup."

"It's for her."

"But you'll make it for you."

"How about I decide?" Elizabeth suggested, "You have no food in your apartment."

"Yeah, we usually order take-out," Ashta said.

"I noticed," she replied, "Where's the supermarket."

"Oh it's…" mother and daughter both turned to look at each other, "Where's the supermarket?" they asked each other at the same time.

"You don't know where the supermarket is?"

"Again, we usually order take-out," Ashta said.

After a little exploring they found the supermarket and picked a few food staples that Elizabeth recommended. Then they settled on shopping for clothes since that was something she desperately needed.

"Oh this is perfect!" Ashta cried and held up a black dress to Elizabeth.

"No, it's black."

"And black is bad because it's what…slimming?"

"No it's mourning," Elizabeth explained, "I refuse to mourn for him."

"How about this?" Teyla held up a yellow sundress and saw that it was too big for her, "You need to gain some weight."

"I know," she said while casually looking at the dresses, "How about we move on to some more casual stuff?"

"But you'll need nice stuff for dating," Ashta said.

"No I won't since I won't be dating," Elizabeth replied, "Come on, let's go over there."

They picked out several everyday outfits before going to Ashta's first suggestion; shoes. While over there, Teyla spied a beautiful antique mirror with engraved wood framing the looking glass. "Elizabeth, I just realized you don't have a mirror in your room, what about that one?"

Elizabeth looked at the full length mirror and saw the stranger looking back at her. A thin creature who was as pale as a sheet of paper and whose eyes were empty of the luster they once held. Then the mirror was no longer resting in a crowded market but in an elegant bedroom and she saw herself standing in front of it wearing a thin chemise, almost transparent. Silas stood behind her and placed with hands on her shoulders in and iron grip and swung her around, "You don't ever disobey me you whore!"

She stared into his cruel eyes and tried to swallow her panic, "Look at yourself," he spun her around so she faced the mirror again, "You're a gangly creature. You're so disgusting that you can't arouse me into taking you. How can you look at yourself in this thing?!" he shoved her up against the glass and it shattered into a thousand diamond shards. Her head and body ached and was laced with hundreds of tiny cuts. Elizabeth huddled on the ground and stared at the fragments of glass, seeing pieces of her self instead. She was shattered.

Her husband's cruel hands grabbed her hair and dragged her to her feet, "I'll show you what a disobedient wife gets!"

"No!" Elizabeth shouted, back into reality.

"Elizabeth?" Teyla asked, "Is something wrong?"

She saw herself, a broken woman who could tempt no man and still possessed a mockery of innocence. She hated herself. Elizabeth pushed people as she fled the stand and ran as fast as she could to no where; she had no idea where she was going. Teyla called after her with Ashta on her heals. Elizabeth stopped behind a small building, gasping for breath. She heaved up the contents of her stomach and knelt with her head between her knees, praying for the world to stop spinning.

"Elizabeth!" Teyla cried as they finally reached her.

"Why can't I escape him?" she sobbed, "He's everywhere. He watches me wherever I go. I want him to die. Why can't he just die?!"

"Calm down," her friend soothed and wrapped her into a hug, "Silas is dead."

"No he's not. He haunts me and I can't escape him."

"It'll be okay, we'll take you home," Teyla said and guided her towards the exit, "Let's go home."


As much as Ashta and Teyla adored Elizabeth staying with them, the main reason was that she could cook, but they had to admit that she also caused them to forget things like that it was Ronon's weekend with Ashta.

"I'm late, I'm late, I'm late!" Ashta exclaimed as she rushed around the apartment.

"Well then get ready," Teyla told her daughter annoyed.

"Gee you're nice."

"You're father called; he's coming to pick you up which means I'll have to see him which means this is as nice as you're going to see me." Teyla said.

"Whoa my parents are going to be in the same room," Ashta began, "This might be the thing that makes the universe implode."

"Ok you can go to your room and pack," Teyla pointed to the door, "and don't disturb Elizabeth she's had enough excitement today."

Ashta headed to her room but turned around, "I could stay you know and help her out."

Teyla smiled and shook her head, "No I know how much you love seeing your father and she'll be fine."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes I am," She turned Ashta around, "Now go pack."

Ten minutes later Teyla heard a knock on the door and cringed. She stood there staring at the closed door listening as her ex husband continued knocking.

"Usually that means open the door," Ashta said poking her head out of her room.

"I know so why don't you open the door."

"Nope I've got packing to do remember?" And then her daughter abandoned her.

Ronon's knocking became more insistent, Teyla sighed before answering the door.

She hadn't set eyes on him for a while. Ashta had gotten old enough to travel by herself to and from her apartment.

He looked great, like when she first set eyes on him nothing had changed and her heart still sped up when she saw him. She hated him for that; actually she hated him for a lot of things she just couldn't remember any of them right now.

"Hi…uh Ashta is…packing," She choked out.

"Oh good," He said.

"Yeah."

The two of them were silent for a moment avoiding each other's eyes. "Am I allowed in?" Ronon asked.

"Oh yeah," She said and walked inside apparently his invitation.

Ashta came into the living room, "Hey Dad I'll be ready in ten minutes."

He nodded and Teyla rushed to her daughter, "I'll pay you twenty dollars if you're ready in two minutes," she whispered.

"You were married to him you can talk to him," Ashta whispered back.

"Look at how good our marriage turned out," Teyla reminded her.

"Mom look at it this way, the longer you argue with me about this the longer it will take for me to pack and the longer Dad will be here."

Teyla winced and plodded back to the living room, "Ashta will be ready soon."

Ronon nodded and sat down on the couch. The seconds ticked by and Teyla thought she was losing her mind. She had to fill the silence, "Elizabeth came the other night to stay…we got caught up with that."

"When did you start taking in strays?" Ronon asked.

"Elizabeth is not a stray she is a very good friend of mine who happens to be going through a very hard time." Teyla informed him her words getting icier by the minute.

"What did she do break a nail?"

She was shocked, "You know what I'm not even going to argue with you…you hypocrite! How many times does your criminal of a friend John stay at your apartment?!"

"That's different you don't see him disrupting my life."

"Oh yes you're right you just let all your little girlfriends do all the disrupting."

Ronon grinned, "Trust me they're welcome to disrupt."

"Well they better not be there when my daughter arrives."

"She's my daughter too."

"Well I'm glad you realized that, perhaps now you can stop subjecting her to tramps!" Teyla yelled at him.

"My Mom and Dad ladies and gentlemen," Ashta said interrupting everything. She looked at them disapprovingly, "Be nice you two."

"We are being as civil as we can with one another," Teyla told her daughter pointedly turning her back to Ronon.

"I know so please stop fighting," Ashta begged and hugged her mother, "I chopped it down to four minutes could I get ten dollars."

Teyla shoved her towards the door, "No, now I'll see you in a few days after my mission."

"Ok I'll see you then," Ashta said and followed her father out the door.

Teyla collapsed on the couch breathing a sigh of relief, "That was Ronon wasn't it?" Elizabeth asked stepping out of her room. Teyla nodded, "It's been ten years right?"

"Yes."

"How are you doing?"

"It's been ten years remember?" Teyla said, "I'm over him by now." Elizabeth looked at her skeptically, Teyla sight, "I hadn't actually seen him since Ashta's birthday which was seven months ago. We got into a huge argument while cleaning up after which I told him that I hated him for a thousand different reasons."

"And?"

"Let me put it this way, when I first saw him here I couldn't remember any of them. Now I remember every single one and have added a few more to the list."


"He's just this jerk," Ashta said as she followed her father to his apartment on the base, "I've told him twenty times to leave me alone but he can't seem to help himself."

"When I was a kid no one ever picked on me," Ronon commented.

"That's because you were a head taller than the teacher and much larger."

"True," he replied and they both laughed a little.

When they reached his apartment they noticed that the front door was open a crack. "Dad, did you forget to lock the door?"

Ronon pulled out his pistol and pushed Ashta back, "Stay behind me."

"You mean someone broke in?"

"No I just want to play Follow the Leader," he replied wryly as he crept up to his apartment and kicked the door open to scan the apartment.

The intruder was a handsome man with dark, messy brown hair and hazel eyes that stopped women's hearts who was sitting on the sofa drinking beer, "Hey Ronon."

Ronon glared at him and holstered his gun, "Sheppard what are you doing here?"

"Thought I'd drop by," John said and smiled at the girl behind his friend, "Hey squirt."

"Squirt!" Ashta protested, "I hate that name."

"Why do you think I use it?"

"Seriously, what are you doing breaking into my apartment?" Ronon demanded.

John finished off the rest of his beer, "I need a place to stay."

"What's wrong with your ship?"

"Well I think they'll kick me out of the hangar bay eventually."

"What about your family's home on Ranusha?" Ronon asked.

"It's too far away," John explained, "I'm here to sign up."

"Seriously?" Ashta asked, "You want to join the Latorians and give up a life smuggling, bar fights and beautiful women?"

"Well only the smuggling is going to go," John said with a grin.

"Why the sudden desire to join us?" Ronon asked, "I thought you said the Latorians already had all the help they needed since the war is almost over."

"Did you hear about the massacre on Baringea?"

"Yeah."

"I saw it," John replied, "I saw the Berakins slaughter innocent people, including women and children, because they thought one of your spies was hidden on that world. All I can say is that I can't sit back and let those villains get away with mass murder like that."

"Wow, John Sheppard is actually noble," Ashta commented teasingly.

John rolled his eyes, "Go color on the walls or something."

"And mean," she continued.

"Can I crash here for a while?" John asked Ronon.

"Sure it's not like I have much of a choice."

"Mom's got a roommate now too," Ashta said.

"Really, she's got a boyfriend?" John asked, surprised.

"No, it's not a boy. It's Elizabeth Gordon."

That shocked him even more, "Elizabeth Weir?"

"Yeah, her husband died recently."

John grinned devilishly, "Really?"

"A little eager there aren't you," Ashta commented.

"No just curious," he defended.

"Uh huh," she rolled her eyes and went to her room.

"Your kid knows too much, Ronon," John told his friend.

"Don't look at me," Ronon said, "It's her mother's fault."

TBC


A/N: Confused??? Don't worry, next chapter is ALL flashbacks about the past to show you what has happened and to catch you up it will be fun and introduce everything and make it all clear. Please Review.