Discarded
By: DarkBlue Mint
Disclaimer: I feel that it will never be mine.
Notes: I wasn't going to do this, I considered Han-san's sequel official, and I promised myself that any adds to this story would only be in Spanish… My brain had other plans, and it reminded me that I'm its slave not the other way around.
A part of Kuga Natsuki thought that this moment would be more clichéd if she was in a smoky bar and had a bottle of whiskey in front of her; as things stood the only companion of her night was a glass still filled with Coke, and the lighted atmosphere of Linden Baum. She had wanted to go to a bar (and probably if she convinced Midori the woman would have bought her a drink), but before knowing that Shizuru was walking out of her life, she had promised Mai to come and see her, not that she was good company taking her silence.
Mai at the beginning had tried to make her talk, nothing had worked not even inviting Nao to the table; the other redhead had tried her typical antagonistic spiel, but Natsuki had simply kept her eyes in the melting ice-cubs. Dead eyes, filled with tears that she was to stubborn and too proud to let go. She really needed a drink, she needed someone telling her that the morning had been a dream, she needed more time (time that had been wasted), she needed Shizuru.
"She's not coming back." She murmured (and for a moment Mai thought that her friend was coming back) only to fall silent again.
It was her fault after all, she had knew deep inside of her that her feelings for her oldest friend ran deeper than what she wanted to admit; after all she loved Mai as a friend and that was less than half of what she felt for Fujino Shizuru. And yet she had refused to admit them out loud, she had refused to confess that knowledge to the one that mattered the most; until it was too late, until the woman had left her.
She was wasted now, so long without listening to her heart, which in retaliation the muscle had decided to take revenge by shutting out everything, the world, her friends and her enemy. All was feeling too far away, and only the memory of Shizuru mattered, everything that was left of the friendship were memories, all because she hadn't confessed the moment she figured everything out.
The glass of Coke was warm now, it had been sometime since the ice-cubs melted, and she was now clasping it in her hand, as if that simple and fragile thing was the only thing that kept her tethered in the world. Nao had resigned her sometime ago, left the table in the company of Munakata and Mikoto; the only person keeping her company was Mai, patient Mai who had warned time and again to tell Shizuru everything or she chanced to lose her (she had thought that time was something she had, and she had been so wrong).
"She's gone…" Another murmur from her lips, and her hand clutched the glass so hard that Mai took her from her out of fear of it shattering. Natsuki brought her hands to her chest and let the tears fall, whispers of 'she's gone' leaving her lips like a desperate prayer. She had let her most important person slip away and there wasn't a bigger sin.
Her eyes turned to the cheerful windows of Linden Baum, she would have preferred some drink burning her throat, and a smoky bar, and perhaps some rain.
End.
More Notes: Dedicated to 2Gay4Work and Beh, for keeping me company in the chat all night.
