A/N- Ok so this is my first Artemis Fowl fan fic. It's sort of based after the forth book the Opal Deception but I haven't read that book for a while and I may have altered it a little o.O hey creative license! If anyone was fallowing the DP story I was writing I stopped because no one was reviewing :-(. Well, that just means please review! I don't want to stop writing for Artemis Fowl but if nobody reads it I'm still not going to update it…or at least the updates will come slower . Disclaimer: I do not own Artemis Fowl although I am contemplating creating and adding my own characters most of them are the creations of Eion Colfier. I have made up many of the places preferring to make up a place then spend for ever trying to find a real place that meets all of my requirements. In other words don't go around saying that all of these places are real because I doubt most of them are. I've decided to list the places that I make up because I feel bad making up places: Gallery of Immigrant art, Area 74

Wanted

Fowl Manor Dublin Ireland

"Ok Artemis here's a good one for you," said an all-business Holly Short on Artemis' communicator.

"I doubt it will be difficult," answered Artemis smugly. He thought he could hear Mulch in the background snickering and shouting I told you so.

Holly just scowled in a get-over-yourself scowl and continued, "The underground black market has had a lot of priceless human paintings, much more then usual. Normally Mulch and I don't get into stolen human paintings but this looks like someone's been cleaning out a museum. Mulch and I need to know what museum or museums the paintings could have come from, where you think they'll strike next, and if the humans have noticed." Holly's image blinked out of the screen and replaced with pictures of art work that Artemis recognized as works of art that would be missed by humans.

"I will call you back in about an hour," answered Artemis as he turned on the computer.

"Alright and Artemis, hurry, Haven's been having…problems lately and I'm hoping that his is unrelated," explained Holly.

"Oh and you are reminding me of this because I'm always so slow?" asked Artemis raising an eye brow and acting offended.

"Just play on your stupid computer," growled Holly and glaring at Artemis with a look that Artemis found very reminiscent of the late Commander Root, and then she hung up.

Artemis chuckled at Holly's anger. He quickly scanned some of the human news sites and found that many important art galleries across Europe and America had reported 'priceless' pieces of art missing. Artemis had to chuckle at the term 'priceless' apparently somebody underground was placing a price on them. Artemis evaluated all of the reported missing pieces of art and searched for a pattern. Most of the masterpieces that Holly had showed Artemis were on his list of reported missing with a few that Holly hadn't found underground. Artemis decided to include them in his data, he was sure Holly and Mulch could have missed a couple of paintings.

While Artemis evaluated the crime scenes from the safety of his home computer he noticed that all of the art galleries were near secure military facilities. Artemis, frowning, checked these facilities for reported break-ins and it turned out that with in a few days of the robberies those 'secure' facilities were also robbed. With a few swift strokes of his keyboard Artemis had hacked into the security system of one of the military facilities. Artemis replayed the footage from the night that the break in was reported until he noticed a faint shimmer just out side the security gates. As Artemis watched the shimmer disappeared approximately thirty minutes after it had appeared. Artemis copied the footage onto his home computer and replayed it while applying his feature, of his own design, on his home computer that took off a shield. There, on his computer, Artemis saw a fairy carelessly using his shield as a loop was being placed on the security system.

Artemis smiled in thirty minutes he'd manage to answer two out of thee questions. Yes, the human's knew the art was missing, yes he knew were the art was stolen from. He also had some extra information he knew the fairy culprit was also robbing local military facilities. Artemis flew his fingers across the key board. He knew exactly how to find possible future targets. Artemis crossed art galleries and military facilities in his computer limiting the search results to Europe and the Americas. Artemis got about fifteen results he marked all of the locations that had already been hit by the fairy burblers on a map in red and the ones that hadn't been hit yet in green. There were only about six green locations. Artemis examined his data again and put the dates of the break-ins on the map, when his data was still scrambled Artemis put the chute locations on the map and suddenly found a pattern. All of the possible locations near chute E37 Paris, France; E1 Tara, Ireland; E7 Martina Franca, Italy; and E18 Stonehenge, UK had been hit.

Artemis looked over his map and noticed that the last possible locations near a chute was near E16 Los Angeles, USA. Artemis Fowl smiled his vampire smile. The answer to the third question, he decided was the Gallery of Immigrant art in Santa Monica, California. Santa Monica, California, also home to one of the USA's most guarded, secretive military facilities, Area 74. Artemis looked at a clock and saw that he still had fifteen minutes and decided to find out when this next robbery would be. Artemis labeled his maps with times and concluded that fairy(s) would probably strike somewhere between Wednesday and Monday. Frowning Artemis called Holly. Wednesday was tomorrow.

Central Haven

Office of Short and Diggums' private investigation firm

"I told you he'd be offended, when you told him this was a difficult one," laughed Mulch as Holly hung up with Artemis.

"Oh, be quiet Diggums," growled Holly under her breathe.

"What was that?" asked Mulch whipping a tear from his eye.

"I said, be quiet," answered Holly with a menacing calm that was very reminiscent of Artemis' dangerous control. The similarity was enough to make Mulch shut his mouth and sit up and give her an odd look. Holly just glared and walked off to her private office.

Holly had convinced Artemis to give her some of the equipment she could use to listen in on LEP reports. One of the ways that Holly got many of her suspects was to make her own files on people who were on the LEP's black list. Foaly did not like the fact that Artemis could just hand equipment over to Holly that could hack into his system, but Foaly didn't want to get his friend arrested so he didn't say anything the few times that his computer had warned him that he was being hacked.

Holly was searching for any reports of unauthorized trips to the surface. The problem with Artemis' contraption was that it was only like a radio; Holly could only here conversations between LEP in the field and LEP in police plaza. Artemis swore that she could get visual from the field and a computer component could get her actually hacking into the files. Holly had only been able to figure out how to work the audio function, much to Artemis' irritation, so she only got current conversations going on in the field.

"—are our main suspects. They've been going above a lot lately," was all that Holly heard when she turned on Artemis' invention. Cursing herself for missing the names Holly listened in on the conversation to try to catch the names again.

"We don't have any solid dirt on them yet. We are waiting for them to slip. We plan on catching them in the act. If we arrest them below ground then we have no proof," explained a showy Commander Sool causing Holly to grind her teeth in anger with him.

"Do you want me to return to police plaza?" asked a rooky who's voice Holly thought she recognized.

"Affirmative, Corporal Neelloc. Return to police plaza immediately," answered Commander Sool.

Holly chuckled slightly. She remembered Corporal Neelloc, although the last time she talked to him he had been Private Neelloc. Holly smiled and silently congratulated the elf for the promotion. Holly didn't think she'd be able to forget him though. Fairies get to choose a name for themselves after they reach a certain age. Most opt to keep there parent given name but some still took the opportunity. Corporal Neelloc had been in LEP training when he was trying to decide on a unique name, a name that could out do Trouble Kelp. Neelloc had been thinking about it during training and when he saw Butler defeat the troll in the training video he chose his name, now the LEP as a proud Corporal Butler Neelloc.

Holly was searching for more useful information in other field conversations but all she found were complaints. Holly sighed and glanced at the moon o meter on her wrist. Artemis said an hour he still had five more minutes. Holly was just about to turn the LEP surveillance device back on when Artemis called her.

"Holly! You and Mulch need to get above ground today," said Artemis as soon as Holly had her communicator out.

"Hello to you too," grumbled Holly to the rude greeting.

"Holly, be serious. I have reason to believe that anytime between tomorrow and next Monday. Our fairy friends may decide to strike in California USA," explained a nervous Artemis.

"Ok. Mulch and I can just take chute E16 and come up in California," answered a confused Holly.

"No, I have a lot of details I need to fill you in on," replied Artemis, "Take E1 and come to my manor as soon as you are above ground daylight or not. Nobody in my family is home you have my invitation already."

"Fine Artemis, but you do realize how dangerous this is for Mulch and me. We are going to be taking a popular chute illegally. I was listening in on the LEP and they are tightening up security," answered Holly agreeing hesitantly.

"We can get to the USA easier from my manor," answered Artemis affirming Holly's suspicions. Artemis wasn't telling her everything because he planned on going along and he could only be assured that he'd be brought a long if he was the only one with all the information.

"Artemis you can be so difficult at times," sighed the elf but giving. Holly chose to ignore the smug smirk on Artemis' face, "Mulch and I will be at your house in about three hours."

Chute E1

Holly and Mulch shoved there way to the ticket counter with forged tickets to the surface. Holly and Mulch were able to get enough information to Artemis that he was able to make them forged tickets for when ever they wanted. The tickets always fooled the person behind the counter although the vacationers that had to be bumped were not always so easily fooled although Artemis' forgeries had stood up to even the most suspicious of travelers.

"Hello, Ms. Short, Mr. Diggums," welcomed a very bored looking teenage pixie girl as she twirled her hair around her finger, "You're on the next shuttle to the surface. Will you be in need of a pilot or are one of you certified?"

"I'm certified," answered Holly showing the girl her certification.

The girl took the form from Holly and found certain codes, as she typed them in her computer dinged. Finally she typed the last of the information from the form and handed it back to Holly.

"Birth date?" asked the girl poised to type the additional information which Holly supplied used to this line of questioning.

Once Holly and Mulch were strapped in and waiting for there go ahead to start there swift climb to the surface the two friends thought they had gotten off with out a problem again but neither of them noticed the hidden LEP officer you was watching there every move and called into police plaza the moment the two left.

Fowl Manor

"Ok Fowl you've got us here. Now will you tell us the rest of the information or do we have to beg on one knee?" asked Holly sarcastically.

"Begging would be greatly appreciated," answered Artemis so seriously that it took Holly a moment to realize that it was Artemis' attempt at a joke.

"Very fun would you get on with it," answered Holly flatly.

Artemis proceeded to tell Holly and Mulch about the military facilities and which pieces had been stolen from which gallery and how exactly he'd figured out where and when the next robbery was going to be until Mulch was actually snoring. Mulch was rudely interrupted my Artemis' computer's beep that he had gotten an e-mail. This wouldn't have been so bothersome to Mulch except the place where he had chosen put his head down was right next to the computer's speakers.

"Why did you stupid computer beep for?" asked a very annoyed Mulch.

"Oh nothing I've just got an e-mail answered Artemis.

Then the computer beeped five more times in a row.

"I better check those e-mails," mumbled Artemis as he rolled his custom made office chair over to his computer.

As Artemis checked his e-mail Mulch and Holly discussed things in haven and there plans for when they got home. They were both unsure of who they'd charge for this particular case. Mulch insisted they sell the paintings back to the museum. They both stopped and looked at Artemis as he turned back around.

"There is a slight problem," said Artemis, "You won't be able to return home for a little while."

"What the heck are you talking about, Arty?" asked Mulch.

"First of all don't call me Arty. Second of all the three of us are considered wanted criminals," answered Artemis.

"Where the heck would you get a crazy idea like that?" asked Holly.

"Those e-mails, one was from Foaly telling us to get somewhere safe, three of them were underground news alerts saying that two suspects of a major crime, Ms. Holly Short and Mr. Mulch Diggums, were seen fleeing Haven a few hours ago, and the last one was Commander Sool himself saying that if I didn't have both of you back to E1 by ten o'clock tonight I would be able to find out what fairy jail is like," answered Artemis as if he was discussing bad weather.

"They can't arrest you!" exclaimed Holly in shock.

"Actually I've been suspicious after carefully rereading The Book that there may be ways to stretch some things in there to make me eligible for fairy jail," answered Artemis.

"D'arvit," mumbled Mulch summing up in one word how everyone in the room full of, now, wanted criminals felt.