Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds

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A/N: Okay well a little depressing one shot I'm afraid... do not ask me what possessed me to write this...partially a dare so I am not fully to blame : )

If you're emotional you may need TISSUES! My friend, the darer of this story, cried...serves her right I say.

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He sat on the bed, images filtering still, images he knew would never fully filter, he looked at himself in the mirror and questioned the man he had become over the hours. He had already changed a part of him missing, no woman would bring that back to him, the woman that had taken it was exactly that gone.

He released more tears, no longer ashamed; it was a difficult loss, one that was irrecoverable from. One that would never leave them no matter how hard they tried or how laid back they were that they could deal, their mind would replay the moments that they watched her fall for them. Their minds would replay how she had chosen to be taken so that could live.

Penelope Garcia was given an ultimatum earlier that day, die or watch her team, her family, die. She chose to die; she chose to let her life get taken for them to live on. The Unsub had them cornered, there was nothing they could do nothing but watch. When the Unsub had fled, he left her on the ground, her body withering from the wounds and the pain, her breath struggled, her eyes crying silent tears. When they reached her, he was the first down on his knee's gathering her up in his arms, cradling her as she cried. He looked in her eyes, she whispered 'I love you' so painfully that he felt his heart break in that instance. It was no lie, he was in love with Penelope Garcia and now she was lost, he was lost, they were lost. He felt her body give out its last breath after the drawn out struggle yet he refused to let go of her lifeless body. Once he let go she was gone, he wanted to hold on to her forever, never let her go.

He remembered Hotch pacing, periodically looking down, even the boss couldn't stop the tears. JJ and Emily had banded together, crying inconsolably on one another. Rossi still knelt on the ground by her body, silently praying that in some twist of fate she would breathe. Reid in the distance trying to attain some reason to what they had witnessed. What was it Penelope always said? Everything happens for a reason. Her death though? The reason for her life to be taken had no reason, it was a pointless act of revenge to get back at the B.A.U. and the Unsub had achieved that perfectly. His revenge was done, and he was still free.

Derek Morgan sat himself up straight, looked around the bedroom, Penelope Garcia was still there. Her scent, her personality, her spirit, but it wasn't enough, it wasn't enough to help him through the days, it wasn't enough to carry him on through life. He looked at the photo on her bed side table, it was of them, facing towards the bed where she would see it first, smiling slightly he remembered the good times but then felt that go as the moments of earlier flooded in and reigned free in his mind.

He lay on the bed, inhaling deeply her scent, the one his loved the most, and cried until exhaustion claimed his troubled mind.

Penelope Garcia was indeed gone.

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A/N: Sorry if you now hate me for it! But I have nicer stories in mind...ones where she doesn't die......

Reviews are loved!