A/N: This fic was intended to incorporate some modern details from the real world and slightly alter the characters' personalities. However, the world of Naruto is forever still the world of Naruto.
"Sasuke, leave me alone!"
Naruto stormed out the door (violently tripping two children with sticky lollipops in hand and creating quite a mess). He paused for a second, then retraced his steps and grabbed his money from the gaping cashier.
"Naruto, don't be overly sensitive," chided Sasuke, matching Naruto's furious pace.
"Overly sensitive? I think it's you who's being overly sensitive. I don't get why buying candy is so freaking hilarious. If you'd like to amuse yourself, go read hentai with Kakashi-sensei or flirt with Sakura or whatever the hell you do."
There was a long pause.
"Of course, Naruto-kun." Sasuke patted his shoulder. "But your voice just rose an octave higher and you're sweating like a pig."
Naruto reddened and quickened his pace.
"Plus, you were buying lollipops. They were heart-shaped. They were pink. And I saw the tag on the package."
This time Naruto's face drained of color, and he whipped around.
"You saw the tag?" he whispered faintly.
"Yup! For – AGHHH!!!!"
Naruto pinned Sasuke to the wall, his fist dangerously close to the bridge of Sasuke's nose.
"Don't – say – word – bout – this," he growled, his tone menacing.
"Ohhh, I get it. You looooooove Sakura-chan…" Sasuke sang out.
"Shut up! SHUT UP! THAT'S NOT IT!!" Naruto groaned and clutched fistfuls of his hair, stamping around like an angry bull.
"No problem, Naruto. I'll go buy the candy for you and give it to Sakura…without mentioning your name, of course," Sasuke teased.
Naruto's nostrils flared. Hell no. Sasuke was notorious for flirting shamelessly with one girl and, without knowing what hit her, she would find him prancing off to another girl. No one blamed Sasuke, of course. What drove Naruto crazy was that Sasuke could weasel out of trouble – unlike himself, apparently. And why was it that Sasuke was flirting with Sakura – DAILY?!?
"Shove it, Uchiha," Naruto said rather nastily.
Sasuke shrugged. "I guess you don't mind that I – for your sake, of course – am going to tell Sakura that you love her?"
Before Naruto could expand his last comment into all the offensive things he would have liked to tell this prick, Sasuke fished out a cell phone from his pocket.
"I have evidence, too," Sasuke said, smiling serenely at Naruto. The screen revealed a picture of Naruto drooling at a shapely, pink-haired girl in a very revealing bikini.
"HOLY -"
"That's enough, Naruto." A figure towered over the two. He pried Naruto's fingers from Sasuke's neck (that was prepared to rip out Sasuke's vocal cords) and shook Naruto's hand off a kunai (attempting to scalp Sasuke) and glared at them both in the eye.
"He started it." Naruto pointed at Sasuke childishly, his mind still muddled with hateful and wicked thoughts.
"Kakashi-sensei, do you really think that I would start something so silly?"
"Suck-up."
"Am not."
Kakashi looked at them wearily. It was like managing two wailing children - so unfair, really. Unless he gave them both a "time-out" and put them in separate corners, they wouldn't SHUT UP and leave him some time to read Icha Icha Paradise. Indulgence in isolation.
"Naruto, stop trying to murder Sasuke. Sasuke, stop teasing Naruto. And – most importantly – go home."
As soon as Kakashi had left – with intimidating threats to ensure total compliance – Sasuke nudged Naruto and whispered, "He mentioned you first."
Naruto glared at him. "So?"
"So YOU'RE in trouble."
"No I'm not."
"Yes you are."
"Who cares anyway? I'm always in trouble. Even if I didn't do anything wrong." He shifted his glance and scuffed at the dirt road with his heel.
Sasuke thought for a moment. "Ohhh…that's why you don't flirt with girls!"
"Can you get off the topic of girls?!? That has nothing to do with this!!" Naruto exploded. Irritated, turned to leave. "Forget it! Why am I talking to you, out of all people?"
Sasuke tagged along. "But you have to tell Sakura! Otherwise someone else is going to take her. She's real pretty, ya know."
Naruto sighed heavily, defeated. "I know. I know. But she's better off…not knowing."
"You mean you're better off without her knowing," Sasuke announced triumphantly. "You don't want to be detached from her if she rejects you."
Naruto nearly tripped. Dammit, where the hell does he get this information?
"But do you really want her? Prove it to me." Sasuke reached into his pocket (he stuffed everything in there) and conjured a small box.
A box of pink, heart-shaped lollipops.
Something called Time flip-flopped in the air, whirling and bouncing and, for a brief moment, springing up from the edge of every minute, every second, every memory - dipping low but never quite reaching the ground.
Naruto gaped at him -
then the box -
then at him again -
and wordlessly took the box from his outstretched hands.
Questions poured into his mind like a downfall of cold rain. But these were the only words that he could manage to say: "Why do you even give a damn?"
"In the end, it'll all work out." His teasing, cold eyes softened ever so slightly. Then, in his cocky, cavalier stroll, he sauntered back to the lifeless mansion he always returned to, day after day.
Naruto stared in Sasuke's direction for what seemed like an hour. Then he flipped the tag over and nearly screamed.
"YOU BASTARD, I'M NOT GOING TO -BLEEP- SAKURA!"
