(A/N: Hi. I know you're all thinking, "Why isn't she updating SL?!" Well, I've been kinda depressed lately, and I haven't been able to concentrate on SL. If I force myself to type it, then Chapter 16 will turn out horrible and rushed, and I don't want to end it that way. Gomen ne. Forgive me? Please? But anyway, this is kinda how I picture Hinata to feel. I don't know why…I just do.)
Poem of a Lost Soul
I am a crutch
For those who need help.
When they break,
I am there
To aid in their healing.
When they are healed,
I am tossed aside,
No longer needed.
Kept around solely for fun.
Sometimes, they use me
For their fun
And I feel happy
And loved
But then, they throw me away.
Once again.
I meet people
Who like me,
Who talk to me,
Who pretend to care.
They never listen,
Not truly, not with their hearts
They listen
Then betray
Secrets kept are the only ones safe.
I am one who is unnecessary.
One who is wanted
Only when another is bored.
Sometimes,
I wonder
What would happen if I broke?
Who would be there to fix me?
To mend me?
Would anyone care?
Would anyone even notice?
Those around me admire
My strength and wisdom.
But they don't know me.
No one knows me
Not the real me anyway.
The pressure
It is overwhelming.
I MUST make good grades.
I MUST be strong.
Else those around me
Will lose their admiration
And I will be completely alone.
So alone.
How do I stay strong
In a world set on breaking me down?
How do I stay so calm?
Emotionless?
Optimistic?
I don't.
It's just a mask.
Just a mask.
When the mask breaks
Will I be alone?
When it breaks
Everyone will know who
And what I am.
I am not who you think me to be.
Far from it.
I do not stay happy.
That is my mask.
I keep my mask
Only by crying to myself
When I'm alone
Only by praying to God
That tomorrow will be better
Only by telling myself
That I am trusted
And knowing that I really am.
But that is all I am.
Trusted, but not cared for
After all is said and done.
My talent
Is keeping my feelings bottled up
Is taking other's sorrows
And easing them
As I drown.
Slowly falling, breaking,
Without anyone's notice.
Sometimes, I wonder
Will anyone ever be there to pick up
The broken pieces of my life
When I am shattered
By the feeling of being unneeded?
Then, I think,
Many people have it worse off than me.
That does little to comfort.
Here and now
I feel alone.
So alone.
Sometimes, I wonder
Why can't I change myself?
What about me is wrong?
But slowly
I realize
All hope is not lost
Friends come and go
But memories stay
Remember the good
Forget the bad
Learn to trust
Give your heart, your all.
Keep moving forward
Because there will always
Be someone there
Who looks up to you,
Who will always be able
To fix you when you shatter
To heal you when you break.
(A/N: How was that? It was my first attempt at a poem, and I'm happy with the turn out. Personally, I like it. I've been really depressed lately, and it's affecting my writing. I really don't think I'll be able to update SL for a little while…I'm really sorry, those of you who really wanted the next chapter. I just haven't the time, nor inspiration. Again, sorry, sadness hurts my writing ablility…)
