NOTE: POI is now showing on WGN and the early episodes are being given air time again. This fic, published 2 years ago was originally deleted from my works - along with my fic on Mark Snow, and on Agent Donnelly. Since I don't know how to add it back to my fic list without republishing, you may have read it before. In that case, mea culpa… (This story pairs Carter with Bear, with a fill-in scene from S2, Episode 20: "In Extremis")
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More than once in her career Detective Joss Carter has puzzled over what might have led her to a certain conclusion, and always before she's been able to analyze her decision tree, follow the logic trail and reach a definitive end.
But this time? Not so much…
A phrase that keeps running around in her mind is the life line to which she desperately clings: a bible quote that adorns the doorway to many buildings across the nation. A tenet adopted by dozens of institutions of higher learning...and the CIA motto fixed in stone at the entrance of their original headquarters building: "And Ye Shall Know the Truth and the Truth Shall Make You Free"
She stands now in the snow, driven by that quote and watching Bear cast ever larger circles, his nose first snuffling in the snow, then up, sniffing the air - looking for an elusive scent only he can identify. A dog searching out a "Truth" on her behalf…
And he makes it look so easy: he simply uses his instincts and follows his nose!
"Trust your own instincts…"
Something she'd heard more than once while growing up. She'd always been one of the lucky ones, a wanted child born into a loving family, to parents who took their child raising responsibilities seriously. From day one their nurturing was balanced with imparting important life lessons, calibrating the moral compass that would serve as a guide for the majority of her time on this earth.
"Joss," her mother told her more than once, "there are two kinds of people in this world: the 'inner' directed and the 'other' directed. Don't be just a follower…"
Her parents probably didn't realize they were repeating a social treatise more than half a century old when explaining the difference between individuals who base decisions on self knowledge and experiences vs. those who follow the crowd, adopting fleeting fads and fashions in efforts to conform to the whims of society. "Trust your own instincts", her mother would say. "Make your own decisions."
Carter was taught early on that she was expected to accept the consequences of her choices, a bedrock principle on which to build a life. Did build her life… So here she is, on a cold winter day, standing on a snowy slope to oversee exhuming the remains of a murder victim…a dirty cop…and asks herself for the umpteenth time: "What am I doing here?"
She can only answer just as many times - doing as she had always been encouraged to: making a choice, drawing her own conclusions, following a trail that will eventually lead to the answers she seeks. Evidence that will allow her to "know the truth", and make her decisions.
But how did she get here?
Sometime, somehow, over the last several months she'd left a firm, principled life path and stepped onto one dangerously curvy and…squishy. She, Joss Carter, the detective known for her straight arrow style and by-the-book methods, is now in the process of breaking at least a half a dozen precinct regulations.
And far more serious laws if Bear finds what she's looking for…
Yes, she's seeking answers - but right now, she's also in the process of protecting her partner. The chubby cop who saved her life more than once, who has been instrumental in helping an elusive billionaire and an ex-CIA agent with their admirable but crazy quest to "save" innocents.
But also a cop who she now knows carries some heavy baggage…
"I killed people, Carter. I was a dirty cop."
Had she asked the man to spill his secrets to her?
No…! Had even told him once that should any of his past sins surface, she would not stand by him.
But now?
She turns around to glance at the two behemoths waiting several yards behind her, shovels in hand, a large folded body bag on the ground between then. Finch's minions. Well paid minions, who she trusts to be discreet about this little venture…because they sure wouldn't be working for the reclusive billionaire – or anywhere - if they weren't!
Bear's circles have now enlarged to several yards in diameter. Carter calls the dog to her and as he quickly responds to her command, she is once more appreciative of the military animal's level of training. The dog has already gone over the ground of the first potential burial location, and although he would have continued searching for as long as she wished, she knew by the increasing size of his casting circles there was nothing at that site.
Or at least not what she'd hoped to find.
She motions to the twin hulks her intention to move on, clipping the lead to Bears collar as she starts the trudge through snow drifts to the third site. She turns up the collar against the cold. Could the weather have been any worse for this venture?
"Let's try the next one, Bear. You'll find something there." she reassures the dog…and maybe herself. With luck they'll hit the jackpot, because after that location there's only one more identified on her map.
And thank God for that map! It had been ridiculously easy to pilfer the satellite image Detective Soriano had shoved in front of Fusco during that interrogation. Not so easy to convince Finch to allow her to use Bear in pinpointing which of the four possible burial spots entombed the remains of the late Detective Stills.
She still isn't sure whether his reluctance was rooted in concern for her safety…or that of John's dog!
But she had been adamant with the geek that he help her this time. She needed to get to the truth, needed to get "Free" from her doubts…and she was willing to use up all her credit with the billionaire to accomplish that.
"Cal is dead and Fusco is being investigated by IAB. This time you're going to do something for me!"
In a small corner of her mind she had been terrified Fusco had a hand in the killing of Cal Beecher. And if that were the case, she isn't sure what she would have done. As a duly swore servant of the people, arrest her partner for murder...or would her actions more closely have resembled those of John Reese, ex-CIA vigilante? It bothers her more than she is willing to admit that she honestly doesn't know.
Fusco denied any involvement in Cals death, or that he killed Detective Stills. She is trusting her instincts on this one: she believes him. He has not been reluctant to confess his past crimes to her…had in fact volunteered to do so earlier, but she hadn't wanted to hear it before.
Then eavesdropping on Sorianos interrogation of Fusco revealed information that is even more disturbing! It leaves her torn between loyalty to a partner who has repeatedly had her back, horror at the full scope of his past transgressions, and true fear at the scope of the dirty cop network.
But her focus is now on uncovering the truth about Cal's death, and for that she needs assistence. From Fusco, the cop currently in danger of being arrested for killing Stills. And if he gets arrested, she will have no help at all.
So first things first.
Carter checks the satellite image again and leads Bear to the edge of the third circle outlined on the map. Pulling out a thermos filled with lukewarm water, she offers him a drink from the oversized top. He welcomes the gesture by lapping the cap dry, seemingly thankful to clear his throat and warm chilled nasal passages.
Not unfamiliar with the working of Cadaver dogs, she knows that Bear is not really tracking anything...after all, he has never met Stills and she has no article with the detective's scent, nor can she establish a "last seen" start for the canine.
No, he's involved in an activity much more esoteric: trailing, air-scenting, searching for odors of human remains, sorting out the smell of decomposition gasses, skin rafts, and distinguishing them from all the other scents in the area. The snow cover is not a deterrent; after all, cadaver dogs can locate human remains under water by simply scenting the air above it.
She knows the process Bear uses is much like acting out the old Sesame Street song that a far younger Taylor had so liked: "One Of These Things is Not Like The Others…" The dog will sift through all the odors he comes across, identify and sort, triggering memories of those he has scented before.
He doesn't know what it is he searches for, only that when he locates a scent "not like the others", that special collection of odiferous molecules similar to those which he has been trained to recognize…he will indicate his find and expect to collect his prize!
For this, all Bear needs is the presence of a single human piece of decomposing tissue, a single tooth, a single drop of human blood...
"Bear... Zoek!" she commands, putting as much authority into her voice as possible while she unhooks the leash. He willingly works for John...and Finch; she can only hope that this willingness extends to the ex-op's friends and that he will continue to work for her too.
Bear bounds across the snow, alternately sniffing air and ground as Carter shifts her legs, willing her feet to ignore the cold. The dog is doing all the work, but the heavy weight of anticipation she currently shoulders is agonizing. What if Soriano was wrong? What if there are no remains for Bear to find?
The muscular twosome who followed her to the third potential burial site are now mirroring the traditional utility worker's stance: leaning on their shovels, apparently willing to wait until doomsday or until she gives the signal to move, whichever comes first.
Finch must be paying them a fortune…
Fifteen minutes pass, then twenty. Another five minutes, she thinks, and she will move the dog to the last spot on the map, though Bear still seems enthusiastically sure that he will locate whatever it is the female human wants and thus collect his reward.
Carter knows he's not so much interested in earning a mere doggie biscuit: what the dog is really working for is the ball he has already scented as located in her pocket. A lively game of fetch in a snowy field? Now that the dog apparently considers worthwhile compensation for all his efforts!
Suddenly Bear stops. A couple more sniffs, he stiffens…and starts digging into the snow cover to the hard ground beneath. His nails disturb the top layer of soil, releasing invisible gases that only he can identify, confirming to him his find.
Dropping his butt into a sit to indicate the end of a successful hunt, he turns his head to the human and pants happily, bright shining eyes clearly communicating, "Come see what I found!"
Carter sighs; the die has been cast. She signals Finch's bulky pair and they advance on the triumphant dog, carrying the empty body bag, readying their shovels for the strenuous dig.
While the men force their shovels into the frozen ground, she pays her debt to the dog and throws the ball for Bear. The delighted animal races after it, antelope bounding over snow drifts while she quietly breathes into the cold air, "I'm trusting my instincts, Mom. I'm going to after the Truth!"
The decision is made, a choice confirmed. All consequences are now on her as she acknowledges she's truly on a path of no return…
End
