Disclaimer: I don't own 'Haikyuu!' (like, obviously, right?). However the OC, Saki Yamada, is all mine.
Feeling Sorry
There had always been a strange, certain thing between them. It existed in many ways, took many forms, but there was also always a peculiar distance between them. It was more physical than anything – the seating arrangement seemed determined to keep them apart.
That was until their third year, when Tetsuro Kuroo found himself sitting right beside Saki Yamada.
With five minutes until the lunch bell, their teacher gave them the opportunity to talk freely among themselves. Regarding that, Kuroo was firstly, happy, and secondly, insistent.
"Hey, Saki."
It was simple enough to be unassuming, though she cast him a critical glare regardless. "What?"
Kuroo smiled easily. "The teacher told us to talk to the people we're sitting near."
Her eyebrow rose slowly. "There's someone on the other side of you as well."
"No one's on your side, though. I don't want you left out."
While it was true Saki had ended up with a window seat, she wasn't unhappy about it. She had a habit of rubbing people the wrong way, and for that reason she avoided them. Kuroo had not yet been deterred, and she had long since stopped resisting his pursuit.
"I won't feel left out." She assured.
"I would feel bad."
"And that matters?"
He knew from her smile that was teasing him, and so Kuroo forgave her. It was hard not to when she looked so irresistible. Her blue eyes wrinkled at the corners, lined with the shadow of makeup that did little to distract him from the dusting of freckles over her face.
"So how's your day been?" Kuroo ventured to ask.
Saki shrugged. "Uneventful. Ask me something more interesting."
"Do you realise that you're frowning right now?"
All at once, her expression eased. "Do you realise you look like you just got out of bed?" she snapped, concealing her irritation badly.
Kuroo managed a small smile. He had tried a variety of methods, but nothing had worked to undo his perpetual bedhead. He reached up unconsciously, tousling the black hair even further.
"I wouldn't worry about it, though," Saki added coolly, "I think it's cute."
"Cute?"
"Yes."
He had to stare – she gave him no other choice. Saki admitted it so nonchalantly, without even looking at him. She seemed not to care that his cheeks grew a little warm, but then that was nothing new. He had never considered her liking him an option. She had once told him that she already liked someone, so he felt it was hopeless to even bother.
"The bell's about to go." Kuroo noted absently.
She nodded, her ponytail bouncing around. "Thank god, I'm starving."
"Saki?"
She looked at him, her blue eyes clear and piercing. "Yes?"
Kuroo swallowed his hesitation. "Do you think you could wait a bit here? I want to talk to you."
Now it was her turn to stare. Saki was not prone to receiving requests, much less accepting them. She barely understood why, and her comprehension of his words was even poorer. At best, she managed a curt reply, muttering, "Yes."
As quickly as she could, she averted her eyes away from Kuroo. He always looked at her so intensely, and that slight smile put her on edge. She would never betray the butterflies in her stomach like that.
Thankfully, for whatever awkward conversation would ensue, the bell rang seconds later. Kuroo remained seated, barely flinching. Chairs scrapped across the floor, and still he retained his cool. Saki was tempted to stand, but couldn't find the nerve.
It wasn't the first time she had been alone with Kuroo, but there was something different about his attitude this time. For once, he seemed reserved. She'd never known him to be shy, and would have prided herself on the same, if Kuroo hadn't gone and changed that in her.
"You're not really starving, are you?" he ventured at length.
"It's an exaggeration." She conceded.
"Good. I'm not sure how long this'll take."
"Forever, if everyone insists on being this slow to leave."
He chuckled lightly. "Ah, you're so grumpy today, Saki."
"Only when you talk to me, Tetsuro."
Kuroo watched her smile grow fondly. He wasn't used to her displaying such playful behaviour unchecked, and felt the need to confirm it as real. "Are you teasing me?"
"No," Saki retorted, though her smirk remained, "I'm grumpy."
"Liar."
"Whatever. We're alone now."
Kuroo realised, belatedly, the truth of her words and an idea followed that held true to his opportunistic nature. He took what he could when he could, and teasing Saki was becoming second-nature to him at this point. "We are alone," he agreed, glancing around, "Are you afraid because it's just the two of us?"
Saki twirled a strand of her hair idly, studying the brunette lock. "Not really." She dismissed.
"Anything could happen." He insisted.
"I doubt it."
There was something about her nonchalance that bothered him. Kuroo tilted his head, rubbing a frustrated hand through his hair. Of course Saki wasn't looking at him, no matter how much he hoped.
"Because you like someone?" Kuroo blurted.
"What?"
He stood at last, pushing himself hastily upwards. Kuroo took a few steps but it didn't help his situation – the restlessness would persist until he finally uttered those words out aloud.
"You said you liked someone," Kuroo explained quietly, "And that because you wouldn't like anyone other than them, you'd feel sorry if anyone liked you."
"I do like someone." Saki still didn't look at him. She only bowed her head further, avoiding his gaze and causing her ponytail to fall over her shoulder. There was, unknown to him, the faint glow of a blush on her cheeks.
"It won't stop me."
"Hm?" Saki pulled back from her thoughts hastily, spinning in her seat, "Speak clearly." She ordered.
Kuroo avoided her gaze for the sake of his composure. As if it could disguise his fluttering heart and nervous fingers, he began to lean against one of the desks in a poor semblance of calm. "It won't stop me." He repeated firmly.
"Stop what?" Saki wondered.
"Who is it?"
"Who is who?"
"I mean, who do you like?"
She moved without her own accord, standing before she could think to breathe. "Why does it matter?"
Kuroo managed a smile, forced though it seemed to them both. "I guess I'd be jealous. I am jealous."
"Tetsuro, are you saying…?"
With the way she appeared now, cheeks painted red and eyes wide, he couldn't not look at her. She was the most interesting and abstractly beautiful person he had ever come across, and he wanted so much to mean the same to her.
Kuroo's shoulders fell, though he was far from resigned. "I don't want you to feel sorry for me."
Saki frowned at him. "Are you trying to confess to me?" she asked, acting on impulse more than real suspicion.
"Well," Kuroo objected, smiling playfully, "Didn't I just say I didn't want you feeling sorry for me?"
"But I wouldn't," Saki exclaimed. Her nails dug into her palm, but the anxiousness wouldn't leave her, "Even if you did like me, I wouldn't feel sorry for you. You're an idiot, yeah, but I only meant I'd feel sorry if that someone who liked me wasn't the person I liked – so I wouldn't feel sorry for you."
"So, if it was a confession…"
"If?" Saki took a deep inhale to match the time breathing escaped her. She didn't even want to think any further on that thought.
Suddenly, Kuroo pushed himself off the table. He was on his heel, turning to face in her in a second. As he watched the emotions flit across her face, mirroring those he felt himself, he realised many simple truths. He wondered why he couldn't just say it – there was nothing at all stopping him.
Saki was quicker to speak. "Do you like me, Testuro?"
The question stuck to her lips. She wanted an answer and she was sick of waiting for it. Kuroo liked teasing her just a little too much, and it really was becoming rather inconvenient.
The answer, Kuroo decided, needed to be explicitly clear. With that in mind, there could be little other objection to kissing her.
He didn't expect her to react at all, and barely gave her the time to. Saki took a single step backwards, but found herself pressed against a desk that would budge no further. It was lucky for Kuroo, who only meant to kiss her quickly but soon found himself pressed against her moments later. His hands were either side of her, white and balled against the desk top.
Saki had no desire to see beyond that border, crafted by his arms at either side, and gave herself wholly and completely to the sensation that lasted a few eternal seconds.
"Oh," she mumbled, pulling back slowly, "That was…"
His lips curved into a smile, soft and uninhibited. Whatever reservations he once had were now gone, because he now understood how useless they were to him. "I like you." He confessed.
Saki's forehead bumped against his chin, before she settled into his embrace. "Good," she declared, lacking her usual attitude, "I like you too."
"Okay, good."
"It is." She agreed.
"I know."
"Good."
"Good."
Saki's fingers found their way around his neck, teasing his hair lightly. The perpetual bedhead, his absolute determination, the cunningness with which he wheedled his way into her heart – all these things made it so much more absolute. She, irrefutably, liked Kuroo and there was no way around it.
"Can you kiss me again?" Saki asked suddenly, acting on impulse.
Kuroo didn't need to speak to answer her. He was very willing to oblige, particularly given their proximity. The space they shared allowed for none apart, for a complete experience. The weight of her arms around his shoulders and her fingers pressing against the nape of his neck were both very acute sensations.
From her eagerness, he could tell she felt the same. His hand on her leg, a little higher than the hem of her skirt, probably did not help Saki avoid blushing a deep scarlet.
"I've wanted to do that for so long." Kuroo admitted, smiling gently.
"I haven't." she replied honestly.
"Oh?"
"But I'll want to do that a lot more now."
"Who would've guessed you knew how to flirt?" Kuroo teased.
Saki's feelings were expressed explicitly in her flat stare. "I wasn't flirting."
"Well that just means you meant it," he shrugged dismissively, taking a step back, "Which is something I think I can be okay with."
"Now you're flirting."
He smiled ruefully, only half-heartedly apologetic. Already, he was leaning in to kiss her again. Saki was easily able to read the impulse, with all the understanding of someone who was impulsive themselves. A quick peck on the lips ensued, lasting only a brief moment.
Her eyes fluttered open belatedly, only to the sight of his face. Kuroo was inexplicably close, his breath warming her lips while the tip of his nose teased hers. Even though his eyes remained shut, his resolution was palpable.
"I'm done with distance." He muttered softly.
Saki's lips parted seamlessly, opening to utter a breathless reply. She cut herself off in surprise, with all the swiftness that Kuroo pulled away with.
In a second, he spun on his heel and was racing away. Not another word left his mouth, the intensity fading into memory, and speech into silence. Saki was stunned, still as a statue. It was all she could to catch a glimpse of his expression – and it was that sight to which her smile was owed. Kuroo was blushing an irrefutable, deep red.
The classroom door slammed shut on his way out. Saki was alone, left in the silence that was empty of all but the pounding of her heart. Even her thoughts seemed to stutter, reality chasing her.
She laughed breathlessly, beginning to say, "That was-"
She was promptly and resolutely cut off by the door slamming open once more. She reeled at the sight, the silhouette of someone in need of a good hairbrush.
"Sorry," Kuroo announced, rubbing the back of his neck and laughing sheepishly, "I forgot something."
Saki tilted her head curiously. "Like what? Your dignity?"
He laughed lightly. "No, no. I forgot to ask – do you wanna go out with me?"
She dipped her head, hiding a shy smile. "Only a little."
It would be the death of her, Saki was certain, but she certainly wasn't going to spend any time feeling sorry about it.
I can't believe how long it took me to finish this (too long). Kuroo is easily one of my favourite characters out of the series, and I really wish I could've seen more of him but oh well.
I hope you enjoyed this oneshot, please leave a review, and thanks for reading!
