She didn't want an apology. She didn't want him to say 'sorry,' or to play with her hair, or to make her smile. For the first time in her life, she didn't want him to come back. At all. She wanted him away from her, away from her life, from her eyesight, from her dreams. She wanted him to stop haunting her, taunting her, jaunting her. She wanted him to disappear, vanish, become as transparent as air. Yes, she wanted him to become like this.

They said he was home now.

Home where?

To the people he irrevocably left? To the village he tried so hard to forget? Or to his teammates who had already forgotten him?

Where was his home? Was it inside Anbu's lair, fanning the king until he was fast asleep?

No. She knew his home was nowhere. She had watched him for an eternity, each day, telling herself that he was –one day- going to call her home. But no. No. He only grew colder, only grew more distant, only clawed at her, maimed her, squeezed the life out of her. No. For one such as him, there was no home. He was nomadic. He was – ironically – like a migrating bird.

Except birds were supposed to be beautiful, with their sweet chirping, and their beating wings.

No, no, no. He wasn't beautiful. Not at all.

At least not for her.

~*~

Silence.

Two figures within the room; one standing, one sitting.

Cold.

Dark.

"Sakura," Neji nodded, acknowledging her presence in the room. She was ready. Ready for today, ready for the test, ready for anything that came her way. "The exam starts in little less than two hours," Neji informed her, pacing around perimeter. She rather thought he looked like a duck, but she was wise enough not to speak her mind. She had learned her lesson once before. "We should pass this time," Neji accused her, glaring at her like she was a bestial object. She rolled her eyes as her thoughts drifted away.

To Naruto, the boy who came back. To Kakashi-sensei, and Orochimaru, who was in hiding. Yes. To all these people.

But mostly to Naruto.

Naruto, who had finally joined Anbu. Naruto, who had become Jounin before becoming Chuunin. Naruto, who turned out to be a genius after all. Naruto – the loser – who had once again proved his worthiness over her.

She missed him. Missed him terribly. Missed him as Naruto – because he was always there as the Captain, or the Soldier, and even the Man – but never as Naruto. She wanted to see him again before she went off to the Jounin exam; it was his 'good luck' charm that had prompted her to pass the previous tests. She could still remember the smile on both their faces during the celebration afterwards. He had grinned brightly at her, showing his full set of teeth; and he drank down his juice viciously, asking for even more bowls of ready-set ramen. Yes. Those were the good days, as she perceived them to be. Back in the good, old days, when no one had set such high ambitions; when Naruto hadn't become cold and distant and formal; before she learned the mistake she had made. Oh, how she wanted them back! Her life, her love, her time, her days: all gone within a fraction of a minute.

"Sakura," Neji's voice cut through her thoughts, "let me handle it this time."

"Alright," she nodded once, burying her head within her knees. Cry, she would, for she no longer cared for her forlorn identity; cry, she would, for she no longer felt the pity of her teammate; cry, she would, for she no longer wanted to live. Her fingers trembled, as a feeling of dread suffused over the atmosphere.

"That's never going to help," Neji interjected.

"Shut up," she warned.

"Pitious fool," he spat at her, grabbing her arm. She let it droop.

"Shut up," she lifted her eyelids, licking her lips as she bit down on her tongue.

"Why they assigned me to be your partner, I will never know."

"And why they decided to clash you and me together for the second year running is beyond me," Sakura chuckled, "it saddens me to see that you are still such an arrogant, hot-headed fool. You never thought Naruto was going to become captain, did you? You thought it would be you up there. Or at least someone like Lee or Sasuke. But no. Not Naruto. Not the boy you called a loser way back when," she taunted, "it's too much for you, isn't it?" 

"You--…"

"And what does poor, genius boy have to say about being just average? Being on the same level as me, Chouji, Ino, and all those others who you dubbed as useless, otiose beings?" she circled around him, fiddling with her weapons, "I bet now that even Hinata's a Jounin, you're becoming even more tingly."

A flash of the ever-famous Byakugan.

"How does it feel to be left behind?"

His muscles twitched gloriously.

"You know not to get me angry, Sakura," he seethed ominously. Her head fell at once.

"I'm sorry, master Neji," she mocked, "I didn't know you had a limit, like any other normal person did. I mean, being a ge--…"

"That's it!" he raged, whipping out his left hand as he performed an intricate dance in the air. Each blow was perfected to the core, evidence of the years of training he had undergone. She barely dodged them as they came closer and closer to her. Her eyes scanned the room as she attempted to widen the distance between them. She trembled still.

"One more time and I might really kill you," he admonished, eyelids closing as he muttered a mantra.

"You've told me that before," she muttered, tossing her kunai into the sky as she caught it expertly, throwing it into any random pocket.

"We've still got an hour and a half left," he commented.

She ended the conversation with a nod.

Silence.

And then, for a while, nothing.

~*~

He was back home again. In Iruka's house, eating what was to be professed another bowl of ramen. Except nowadays ramen wasn't a hobby or a passion anymore, it was a routine, a memoir of his childhood he so desparately tried to clung on to. He didn't know why it was that he had become so distant. It was rather ironic, so to speak, Uzumaki Naruto, trying to get away from the world? Maybe it was because he had already been acknowledged by the village as one of their greatest ninja, or that rumors were already in circulation that he was going to become the next Hokage. Or maybe he just grew up, taken off that skin of childishness, of naivety, and replaced it with who he really was. Time could only tell whether his stage now was just a phase or not.

He wanted to visit her, visit Sakura. He missed her terribly, but not as a girlfriend, or as a lover, but as a friend this time. As a companion. A colleague, a co-worker. He had long outgrown his infatuation of her, and it was, in a way, funny how she had started hers of him. Five years ago he would never have expected Haruno Sakura to have fallen in love with him.

"Naruto," a soft voice called out to him. A woman's this time, because Iruka was away on some sort of holiday. She rubbed his shoulders affectionately as she placed her chin on top of his hair. Her fingers absentmindedly stroked his chin and he found himself curling up against her. His Anbu mask was off again, and he eyed it over in the corner of the room.

"What is it?" he asked her, pulling her down onto his lap.

"How are we going to tell her?"

"Tell who?"

"Sakura, you dummy!"

"I don't really know," he answered truthfully.

"She'll be so angry with us."

"Or she'll cry again. But what I'm hoping is that she won't really care. I've been away for a couple of months. She's probably cooled down by now."

"Cooled down?" she asked, resting her head on his strong shoulder.

"Yes."

"That night she told you everything, she came running to me! She cried her eyes out until she fell asleep, and you say she's probably cooled down?" she shouted.

"Calm down. You know Sakura. She got over Sasuke in a month or two after his leaving. Who says she can't get over me like that?"

"You were different," she whispered. "This time she actually had someone she thought would love her back. And she really did love you. Even before she told you, and even before Sasuke left."

Silence.

"And did you know that she never really did hate you. She just didn't understand you."

No reply from the blonde boy.

"And I'm scared -…"

"Of what?"

"Because you just might love her back. Because you just might decide to say one day that I'm not enough and that you'll up and leave and be with someone else. Not just her, anybody."

He flashed her a grin as he poked her in the forehead.

"No-one can predict the future. And besides, we're so young, it won't really matter anyway."

She nodded into his shoulder.

"Quite ironic, isn't it, how you hated me as well when we were kids."

"Yeah. But then Kakashi decided to slap us into one team. He said he needed someone strong and weak together. It turns out you did all the work for me."

"Oh God, I still remember the scarecrow incident."

"What? Where Kakashi decided to turn into a scarecrow to fight us all?"

"Pretty funny when that tree knocked him on the head. We ended up getting a paycheck for that. Of course, I'd never have said that it was a mistake. Kakashi-sensei was still grumbling about his loss way after that."

She laughed. He always made her laugh.

"I guess that's when I knew."

"Knew what?"

"That I loved you."

"Hey!" he protested, "I thought you knew when I was struck down by my own summoning frog!" he grumbled, "stupid frog, he thought it would be fun if we played pin the tail on the donkey. I never thought I was the donkey. I should never have summoned Gama Oyabun."

"Well, that incident too, but more of the scarecrow.''

He chuckled a little.

"Hey," he prodded.

"Hn?"

"What if," he bit his lip, "what if Sasuke came back?"

"Sasuke?"

"Well, what if he did? Would you go back to him?"

"Hell no."

"Why? Don't you love him?"

"If I did would I be sitting her with you?"

"Well maybe I'm just a replacement."

"Stupid Naruto," she looked into his eyes, "if I still loved Sasuke I'd still be moping around picking flowers for him. Now I pick flowers for you."

"Weeds," he coughed, "you pick weeds for me."

"At least I try," she smiled affectionately, "I love you, you know. I'd just like you to say that once to me," she kissed him on his forehad as he wrapped an arm around her waist.

"I know, I know."

But he didn't say it.

And she didn't notice.

~*~

Neji looked out the window once more. He looked at the girl beside him and crossed his arms. He wanted to hurt her. Wanted to hurt her bad. He wanted to make her bleed, make her realize that her problems were nothing compared to his. He wanted her to understand that he didn't care about her near-perfect life, that her obsession with the blonde boy was not the most important thing in the world. He wanted to fight her, wanted to feel superior, wanted to feel that he was better than somebody in the world. How could they surpass him? How could Uzumaki be greater than him? How could the other Hyuuga be promoted over him? How? How? How? Why wasn't it Lee, or Sasuke, or the sand boy, or TenTen who were over him? He could face life if it were them, but it was different now.

He chuckled madly as he bit his lip. Life was ironic after all. And a genius could only extend for so far.

He missed his life terribly. He missed his father, and his mother, and all the other children he used to play with. He missed the pats on the head, and he missed being him, and not someone ruined. He missed those days where he could be carefree and nonchalant, and he found himself wishing that he was never born a genius anyhow. His superiority complex was getting in the way, and it wasn't all for the best.

"Neji," she called out to him. When, when, when would she realize that he couldn't, wouldn't, shouldn't talk to her?

"What is it this time," he seethed.

"I think I'm going to drop out from the exam."

Silence.

And then he laughed.

Laughed so hard it hurt his stomach. Laughed so hard until he didn't know why he started for the first part.

"I'm serious."

And his eyes locked on hers.

"You quit and I fail. I can't let you do that."

She looked away.

"I'm never going to help you. I'm only going to slow you down."

"Well then let me do all the work, goddamnit! Just run around with me and don't get all girl on me and start wanting to be protected! When we're in there you only need to hide yourself!"

This time it was her turn to laugh.

"We're only seventeen, aren't we? Eighteen for you, right?"

"And your point is?"

"When did we get like this?"

"What?"

"Like this," she spread out her hands, "we're so sad. We're waiting for a dream that will never happen. I'm trying to be Jounin. Me. I don't have any talents or special attacks. And you. You're trying to change your clan, or at least take out the first tier. But that'll never happen. You're not able to. Deep in your heart you love them too much. Even Hinata and her father."

"Shut up," he glared. "I'm warning you now."

"Just like you always warn me. And you never really do kill me anyway."

"Oh God!" He threw his hands up in the air.

"I won't quit. Don't worry about that, if that's what you're pacing around for. I was just joking with you."

"Good."

The bell rang.

"Because the exam is here."

~*~

Naruto tried hard to comfort the crying girl. He couldn't understand what it was that made him stay with her. Sometimes he just loved looking at her, sometimes her smile would fixate itself in his mind. And he found himself wondering what had happened over the past five years. He could never have imagined falling for his old enemy. Falling hard. Really hard, until the wind was knocked out of him, until he was afraid that one day it would all be just a dream, and the paramedics would come get him and breathe life once more into his lungs. Yes. He was scared.

He didn't want to love her.

So he didn't say it.

But he knew she understood.

"Naruto," she cried, "she's taking the exam now. I'm just so scared for her."

"It's alright," he soothed, "she'll be OK. She was always OK."

"I suppose so."

"Let's get out of here," he lifted her up, "I'll take you to my favorite ramen shop."

"Oh wonderful," she retorted, voice full of sarcasm. He hugged her possessively.

"I'm paying this time."

"Just like you paid last time?" she smirked, "I had to take out all the money in my bank account to pay for that stuff."

"Well -…"

"You're filthy rich, right? Why can't you pay?"

"Because --…"

"It's not polite to let a girl pay --…"

"But--…"

"This is the last time I'm paying!" she shouted.

"Thank you, Ino-chan!"

And for a while he was Naruto. Uzumaki Naruto, full and true.

~*~

WR: OK, if you want me to continue. Holler. If you don't, holler. Or else, don't holler. Either way I don't mind.