Elena knocked on the boarding house door, scowling when Rebekah opened it.
"Is Stefan here?" She asked, trying to keep her hatred for the blonde vampire off her face.
"Nope, it's just me."
"Oh, ok." She hesitated for a second, before turning to leave. She didn't want to hang around waiting with Rebekah.
"Why so quick to leave?" She asked in that sickly sing song voice of hers.
"Because I don't trust you." Elena spat back, her hand reaching for the door. Would this girl ever tire of playing her stupid games?
Rebekah rolled her eyes.
"But you trust Stefan and Damon?" She asked skeptically.
"Yes." Elena sighed. She really didn't have time for this.
"Why? They're just the same as me you know. They're still vampires."
Elena's face reddened in anger.
"They're nothing like you." She hissed..
"Want to bet on that? …Have the Salvatore's ever compelled you?" Rebekah asked; her voice laced with malice. She was bored, she wanted to play.
"Of course not!" Elena exclaimed. "They would never."
"Well it's not like you would know if they had…" Rebekah chuckled.
Elena scowled at her and turned away.
"I don't have time for this Rebekah. I trust them, they would never compel me." She said with a sigh.
Rebekah grabbed her arm and spun her around to face her. Elena gasped and her eyes widened with fear, Rebekah's eyes caught hers.
"Well let's find out shall we?" She asked sweetly, her vice like grip on Elena's arm tightening even further.
"What? No!" Elena struggled to free herself, to close her eyes, but Rebekah was already gazing into them, her mouth moving slowly as she spoke.
"Have Stefan or Damon ever compelled you?" She asked, her pupils dilating.
Elena cursed herself for not putting vervain in some new piece of jewelry.
Before she could realize what she was doing, her mouth was forming a reply.
"Yes." She answered.
She frowned, how had she known that? When had they compelled her? She felt a rush of betrayal spread through her, how could they? She trusted them.
"Any compulsion of Stefan's will be undone." Rebekah continued, still staring intently into her eyes.
"You could have saved them! You were fast enough to save them, why didn't you save them?" She shrieked, backing away from him. He had no right to just barge into her room, so soon to losing her parents. She didn't know him, he was just the guy who had the chance to save her family, but hadn't. How dare he come here?
"I just had to save you, you were all that mattered." His voice made her sick, the way he whined and wheedled, his stupid fake concerned puppy dog eyes all big and imploring.
"No! I don't want to be saved, not when they're dead. They're my family, what gives you the right to decide who lives and who dies?" She yelled, backing still further away from him. He scared her, he was too fast, too strong, there was something about him she just didn't trust.
"Elena."
"Don't say my name! You don't know me…"
He spoke to her as though she was a small child, she didn't need someone to patronize her. She didn't need this, she didn't need him to come in and play white knight.
"Get out! I don't ever want to see you again, I hate you, I hate you." Her voice broke and she began to sob, tears blinding her.
She shoved at his chest, trying to push him out of the room. She couldn't bear to look at him; he disgusted her. She knew on some level she should feel grateful towards him for saving her life, but she couldn't find it in her. He had condemned her parents. He had chosen to save her over them and she could never forgive that. She didn't ever want to see this strange man again, she just wanted to forget she'd ever met him and mourn her parents in peace.
"Get out!" She screamed again, her voice thick with tears and tinged with hysteria.
He grabbed her arms, his strong hands wrapping around them tightly, too tightly, she struggled against him, trying to pull out of his grasp. He was so strong.
"Stop it! Get off me." She cried.
He didn't let go and she began to panic, her heartbeat quickening and her eyes flicking to the door. What was he going to do to her? Would anyone hear her if she screamed?
His hands moved to cup her cheeks, but before she could pull away his eyes met hers. She found herself unable to look away, like something was holding her locked in his murky green orbs. She heard his voice as though far away.
"You won't remember any of this. You will forget that you ever met me, you will forget how you got out of the car…" His voice was flat and steady, and she heard the words as though through a filter. She could understand what he was saying but she couldn't react to it. She wanted to react to it, she wanted to kick and scream and get the hell away from him. What was he doing to her?
He seemed to hesitate for a second. His eyes looked conflicted, as though he wasn't sure about what he was going to do next. He took a deep breath and whispered the next words.
"You can trust me. You will always choose me."
They echoed around her brain, they sank into her heart. She would always choose him. It would always be Stefan.
And then he was gone, and the memory was gone.
She stood alone in her empty room, trying to figure out how she had gotten there….
Elena gasped, a shuddering sob racking through her body as her eyes flew open. She couldn't believe it. It couldn't be true, not after everything they had been through together, all the long talks, all the promises… There was no way it had all been a lie. But she'd seen it clear as day, she'd remembered it as though it were yesterday. She remembered him pulling her out of the water, she remembered passing out, the image of his unfamiliar face printed behind her eyes, she remembered lying to the EMT's and saying she didn't know how she got out of the water, she remembered him compelling her, taking it all away.
She began to shake with anger, and tears stung her eyes. It had all been a lie. None of it had ever been real. Had her feelings even been real? He compelled her to trust him… Would she still be scared of him to this day if he hadn't? Would they have ever gotten together?
"You will always choose me."
That was the worst of it. He had taken away her choices, he had forced her unknowingly into doing something that she might not have ever done otherwise. She remembered the times she had said those exact words, they had always tasted bitter on her tongue. That night when she had told Damon she would always choose Stefan, it had felt unnatural, foreign.
How could he?
Rebekah's dry laugh brought her back from her thoughts and she raised her tear-streaked face to look at her.
"I'm guessing it was a big one?"
Elena looked away, she felt sick. Her whole world had shifted, everything that she had thought and believed, was messed up, influenced. She didn't know what was real and what was a lie.
"Are you happy?" She spat at Rebekah. "Are you done torturing me yet? Is this some game to you?"
The blonde raised an eyebrow.
"Let's not have a hissy fit darling, it's not my fault he lied. You should be thanking me for showing you the truth."
Elena scowled.
"Let's see what secrets your other boyfriend is keeping from you, shall we?" She grabbed Elena's chin roughly and tilted her face up so she was once again trapped in that gaze.
She found herself silently praying as she heard Rebekah compel her. Please not Damon. Please don't let him have done this too. Please.
She sighed. She was not in the mood to deal with Damon right now. She was tired and emotionally drained and she just needed to sleep.
"I brought you this."
He swung her locket from his hand and her eyes widened, how had he found that? She felt a rush of warmth toward him; only he would bother to take the time to look for something as silly as necklace for her.
"I thought that was gone." She said, a small smile gracing her lips. "Thank you." She nodded, feeling slightly guilty for being so abrupt with him.
She reached for it, frowning when he pulled it away.
"Please give it back." Her heartbeat sped up and she swallowed, she had a bad feeling about this.
"I have to say something."
"Why do you have to say it with my necklace?" He wouldn't actually compel her…would he?
"Well…because what I am about to say is… probably the most selfish thing I have ever said in my life." He was trying to play it off like it was nothing, she could see the little smirk on his lips, his mask.
"Damon don't go there." She sighed. She knew what this would be about. The elephant in the room. His feelings for her, whatever they were…
"I just have to say it once, and you need to hear it." He stepped towards her, his eyes gazing deeply into hers. He nodded, as though only just coming to terms with what he was about to say himself.
All his walls were down, and all she could see was twin blue pools of emotion.
"I love you Elena."
Her breath caught in her throat as her mind registered those words. She had never seen him so open, so honest about what he was feeling. So genuine. She found it strangely beautiful. His words affected her a lot more than they should have.
"And it's because I love you that I can't be selfish with you… " He swallowed, and her eyes widened, he looked so sad.
"Why you can't know this…"
Why couldn't she know it? What was holding her back from it?
"I don't deserve you…. But my brother does."
His words were so completely selfless so completely out of character…
She opened her mouth to say something as he stepped even closer, but then his lips were pressing softly against her forehead and she forgot what she was about to say. He lingered there, as though saving the moment, committing it to memory.
And then he was back to looking at her with those intense eyes that just melted her right to the core.
"God I wish you didn't have to forget this." He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear and palmed her cheek, he was so achingly gentle with her.
She frowned. She didn't want to forget. What he'd just said was the most beautiful thing anyone had ever said to her. She wanted to remember this moment.
"But you do."
A solitary tear dropped from his eye and she thought she might cry too, he was so broken, but so strong, he was so absolutely good in that moment, and she just wanted to take him into his arms and tell him that everything would be alright. But then his pupils were dilating and her mind went blank.
She stood alone in her empty room, trying to figure out how she had gotten her necklace back.
"You don't look quite as distraught as before… Stefan's was worse?" Rebekah's mocking voice snapped her back to reality.
"Please just leave me alone." Elena snapped,
She wrenched herself away from the original and practically ran to the door. She needed time to think, she needed time to understand what the hell had just happened.
She drove to the graveyard, she knew she could be alone there, sometimes her best thinking, soul searching, happened at her parents graves.
She sat down leaning against the stone angel, much as she had that first day she had ever met Stefan… Only it hadn't been the first day she'd met him.
She closed her eyes and let the tears fall freely. She had never felt quite so betrayed in her whole life.
For nearly a year, she had been in a relationship that was based on lies and manipulation, she didn't even know which of her feelings were true, and which were Stefan's twisted implants into her brain.
And then Damon he had felt like he needed to hide from her, he had been so sure that she could never return his feelings that he hadn't even given her a chance to respond. Where Stefan's motivations for compelling her were selfish, Damon's were selfless.
How could she have been so wrong about them? How could everything be so different than she'd thought?
She had gone to the boarding house to tell Stefan that she chose him. That she wanted to give it another try. She hadn't really been sure why she had come to that conclusion, she'd just felt as though it was what she should do. But now, with his compulsion lifted, any desire to choose him was wiped from her heart. In fact, the thought made her feel ill. It wasn't always Stefan, it would never have been always Stefan if it had been up to her from the start.
It was Damon.
It was the way he looked at her as though she was the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen, it was the way he would hurt himself, break his own heart, if it meant she'd be safe, it was the way he was always there when she needed him the most. It was the way he loved her so fiercely that sometimes it scared her. It was the way she loved him back just the same.
That memory of what he'd said was a gift. Both memories were gifts. Rebekah was right, she should thank her. Because now everything was clearer, she didn't feel like there was a constant war raging in her heart anymore. She loved Damon. Plain and simple, clear as day. That was all that mattered. She would deal with Stefan's betrayal, she would probably even forgive him at some point. But she would never choose him again.
Now she just had to find Damon and tell him.
She fumbled for her phone and dialed his number, her hands shaking. This had all happened so fast, everything had changed in the space of an hour. The one last thing she was really sure of was her feelings for Damon.
"Hello Elena." He answered with a sigh, he sounded tired, washed out.
"Damon." She breathed. The sound of his voice brought back the images of that night and she closed her eyes for a second. She wished everything had come to light sooner, she would have saved him so much pain.
"We need to talk." She said softly, she couldn't do this over the phone.
There was a heavy silence on the other end of the line, and Elena realized she was holding her breath.
"Ok." He sounded almost pained. "I'll meet you at your house." The phone went dead and she stared at it for a second before shoving it in her purse and jumping up.
He was sitting at her window seat when she got home and it was almost like de ja vu. He had been sitting there before he told her he loved her, and he was sitting there before she told him she loved him. It was a silly little parallel to make, but it seemed significant to her.
He didn't look up as she walked in, his eyes fixed firmly on the floor.
"Hi." She said quietly.
"Hi." He still wouldn't look at her.
She walked further into the room, taking a deep breath.
"I found something out today, and it changed everything. It made me come to a conclusion and…" She started, her voice shaking a little.
"It's okay Elena." He said, finally meeting her eyes. "It's ok, I get it." He looked resigned, and sad.
"What?" Her brows drew together in confusion and she took a step closer to him.
"It will always be Stefan right?" He sighed. "I didn't expect anything less." He went back to staring at the floor, leaning his arms on his knees.
Elena felt tears spring to his eyes. She never thought she could actually dislike Stefan, but the amount of hurt he'd caused with that stupid, selfish line was phenomenal, she found that hard to forgive.
She knelt in front of him, her hands joining his on his knees and entwining with them.
"You thought that I asked you hear to tell you that I chose Stefan?" She asked, her voice catching slightly.
"Didn't you?" There was a tiny flicker of hope in his eyes when he looked up, confusion, resignation and hope. It was that hope that made her brave enough to say what she said next.
"No Damon. I asked you here to tell you that I choose you." Her voice was barely a whisper and if he wasn't a vampire he might not have heard her.
But he heard her loud and clear.
And suddenly that tiny flicker of hope that she'd seen in his eyes had consumed them. She saw nothing but hope.
"What?" He breathed, searching her eyes for signs of a trick, some misunderstanding, because this couldn't possibly be happening…
"I chose you Damon." She said again, louder this time, firmer. She meant it more every time she said it.
Damon looked completely dumbfounded. If it wasn't such an emotional moment she might have taken pride in the face that she had the ability to render Damon Salvatore speechless.
"Why?" It seemed an odd thing to say, but she understood. No one had ever chosen him before.
"Because it should never have always been Stefan, and because…I -I love you." The second she said it, she came to terms with it herself. She loved him, she was done hiding from it, she was done denying it. She loved him.
An extraordinary smile broke out across his face, the first genuine grin she'd ever seen on him. He made a noise somewhere between a laugh and sob, and she wished she'd been able to say those words sooner. She'd never seen him look so happy.
And then his lips were on hers and nothing else mattered.
So this is what happens at 1am when my imagination gets away with me... Excuse the enormous plotholes and corner cuts, I didn't edit or re-write or anything. I just had to get it out lol! Anyway... Yeah so it's definitely not my best work and it's completely unrealistic, but it was fun to write!
Let me know what you think :)
Twitter: serenasdreams
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