Disclaimer: Alas, it is not I who owns the Weasley clan and the rest of Harry Potter. No, my dears, that coveted prize belongs to the almighty J.K. Rowling, who, rumor has it, has the power to electrocute fanfiction writers from halfway across the world in the event that they should neglect to include a disclaimer. However, if I ask her nicely, she might let me borrow Percy for a few seconds, right?

Oh, Percy Weasley, they say you're a brat,
a stuck-up moron, a pompous prat,

Victimized and little loved,
to the realms of the ministry you were shoved.

Why could you family not understand?
Why was it that you felt as if banned?

A misfit from the time of birth,
you tried so hard to show your worth.

Your siblings in their cruelty,
made your life go difficultly.

The twins, they loved to make their jokes;
respect, your mother could not coax,

Bighead Boy and Weatherby,
you tried to ignore, tried not to cry.

Prefect, Head Boy, you had it all,
but your brothers longed to see you fall.

You tried to be nice, it wasn't an act;
why, you even gave Ron Scabbers, your rat!

12 O.W.L.'s, they didn't bat an eye;
you just sat and gave a sigh.

They'd come to expect perfection from you;
being the best was nothing new.

When school ended, you got a new gig;
Your siblings kept saying you were being a prig.

"Cauldron Bottoms?" They'd laugh and they'd say.
Who knows? You could have changed the world one day!

And then one day you got a promotion,
an event that started quite a commotion.

You parents, now they turned their backs,
but really, it was they ignoring the facts.

No evidence did they provide,
just a crazy boy who almost died.

You'd been raised to research and perceive,
not to simply be told and asked to believe.

They left you no choice, and though your mother would grieve,
you simply had to, had to leave!

You kept yourself safe through that horrible war,
despite life alone being quite the bore.

One day, you found yourself back in their arms;
They were happy to see you, free from all harms.

They were amazed you'd seen reason, and you went on your way,
secretly knowing the ones who had learned were not you, but they.