Pepper,
You are never allowed to read this, because I don't want to break you. Shattered in a million pieces like I am, someone needs to put me together. You're the only one who can. Because, you see, everyone always leaves me. My first friend was Jarvis, the butler, not the one I made. Eventually, he left me. Rhodey, he left me too, he's never even around anymore. See, the problem with me is that everyone I love has more important things to do. When I made Jarvis, I thought I was finally making someone who would never leave me, but guess what? He had something more important to do too. The Avengers? I thought that maybe I had found a family that was as broken as me. Then I went and tried to build a suit of armor around the world. I guess Ultron had better things to do too. They don't trust me now. I wouldn't trust me either. I thought that maybe if I made Vision than I would finally feel right. Kill the one person I could rely on to make up for the thousands I had killed. But all it left me was empty.
I know it's a lot of pressure, but Pepper, now you are the only thing left to fill the gap in my heart. That's why I know that someday, you'll find something more important to do too. I won't blame you though. Admit it, I'm a mess. So you're going to leave. It's an inevitable fact in this world that Tony Stark will be alone. That's why everyone always leaves. Because every moment they try to love me, they are defying the rules of nature. So once it gets too hard, you're going to leave. Everyone always does. I'll admit, you've lasted longer than anyone else. But that just means that every moment you grow more tired of me, every moment something grows more important than me. When that time comes, I hope you'll leave. I hope you'll stop trying to defy laws. I hope you'll give up on me and leave me alone. Because that would just complete the cycle. You don't have to be the one who breaks the cycle Pepper. Some cycles aren't meant to be smashed. Everyone always leaves. You're just next in the line. Now, don't get me wrong, I don't want it to happen. God, I think I'll be crushed when it does. But it will just make my life empty again, and I'll find someone else to fill it, and then they'll leave. One of these days, someone's going to leave and the hole will consume my entire heart, and I'll die. And I hope no one comes to my funeral. No, actually, I'm scared no one will come to my funeral. I'm terrified that I will outlive everyone I ever loved, because sometimes they come back, but when they die, the hole just becomes bigger. Because, Pepper, they always leave. Don't be afraid to break me, I'm already shattered. When you want to leave, go ahead. That's what everyone does.
Yours truly,
Tony
"The Iron Man came to the top of the cliff.
How far had he walked? Nobody knows. Where did he come from? Nobody knows. How was he made? Nobody knows.
Taller than a house, the Iron Man stood at the top of the cliff, on the very brink, in the darkness."
"While the stars went on wheeling through the sky and the wind went on tugging at the grass on the cliff top and the sea went on boiling and booming.
Nobody knew the Iron Man had fallen."
-Ted Hughes
