Hi everyone! This story is a collaboration between me – I (dot) Tripped (dot) Over (dot) Reality and Tempest Cain.

Call us CainMeetsReality! :D

So, since Hephastodite was a couple that was loved by many in my previous fic – Your Guide to The Titan War II: The Last Olympian, here, Tempest Cain and I decided to bring to you a romantic thriller centering around these two gods.

I shall be writing Aphrodite's point of view in this story and Tempest Cain shall be writing Hephaestus' point of view.

Reviews, feedback and constructive criticism are accepted! Flames aren't appreciated, but okay, go ahead and flame if you want to.

This story will be posted on both my account and Tempest Cain's, so don't be alarmed if you see the same fic on FanFiction twice on two different accounts.

You can review anywhere, but review replies will be present in all chapters on both accounts, regardless of who's account you reviewed on.

Hope you like it!


~Aphrodite~


"Oh, Ares," I moaned as we kissed, cuddled together on my bed. My hands were tangled in his hair as his tongue danced around with mine.

"I'm all yours, babe," he grunted and then started kissing me again, tracing random patterns on my back that made me shiver in delight.

Just as things were getting heated up, we were interrupted.

"Ahhem," someone cleared his throat. I groaned. I knew that voice too well.

"Hermes, go away!" I muttered, my voice unclear as my lips were still on Ares'.

"Its an important meeting at Olympus. But if you don't want to come, I'll tell Zeus you're too busy making out with your boyfriend," Hermes snickered, used to this routine of irritating me. He used to complain that being around my boyfriend and me made him want to throw up. Now, he claims that 'our gross acts don't bother him anymore' and 'he'd unfortunately seen us in "worse" situations'. When I would demand to know what, he'd say he'd rather not go into the details. Weirdo.

I groaned in irritation. "Fine, we're coming. Now get lost!"

Hermes chuckled like an idiot before breaking the Iris Message connection and Ares glared at him.

Well, Ares glares at everyone. Everyone except me, of course. When he looks at me, he has an expression full of love.

Okay fine, not love. Its lust. But what's the difference? Lust is always there with love. Its what makes love so desirable.

For the pleasure one gets, you don't need someone you care about. A pretty face or attractive body is enough.

I mean, look at Ares. He's an ugly, mean and idiotic war – obsessed god. All right, the ugly wasn't a complete truth, but still, its not his face that attracts me.

Its his body.

Well muscled and toned, eight pack abs – he was a hunk. That's why he was my boyfriend.

And along with that, he was surprisingly good at fulfilling my desires.

A little rough, yes, but the body made up for it.

"Lets go, babe," Ares said, and kissed me once again.

"Mmm," I murmured as he snapped his fingers and we were transported to the Olympian council.


"Thank you for joining us Aphrodite and Ares," said Zeus, his voice steely.

I didn't bother saying 'you're welcome'. He wasn't. I didn't want to be here.

I went and sat in my throne beside Ares and ugh… my husband Hephaestus.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw his expression full of disgust at Ares and me. I ignored him.

So, you probably think all bad stuff about me, like, she's such a bitch to cheat on her husband, blah blah blah, but you never think about my side of the story.

I was forced to be married to him – a stupid blacksmith with a deformed face and bad limp. It was an arranged marriage. But how could I, the goddess of love, suffer through living with someone I don't love? What kind of an example does that set on the world? So, I'm dating Ares, the man – or god, I love.

Thinking about Ares made me think of our children – especially Eros. And then Camp Half Blood, ohmygods! Its such an amazing playground for me and Eros to play matchmakers! Some of the cutest couples were there… Percy – whose love life I'd made horribly hard, and Annabeth – whose confusion entertained me to no end. It was so cute how she was confused between Luke and Percy! And yet so jealous of that mortal Rachel Elizabeth Dare. Making that Dare girl have a crush on Percy was so much of fun! I love love triangles! And then there was Hermes' insufferable kid Travis, but I had to admit, some of his and his brother's pranks were absolutely hilarious! Yeah, coming back to Travis, his affection for Demeter's girl, what was her name now? Oh yeah, Katie. It was soooo cute! Travis played pranks on Katie just so he could be near her. I had a hard time deciding who was cuter, Percy and Annabeth or Travis and Katie…

"Aphrodite!" our stupid insufferable king thundered, disturbing my thoughts.

"Mmm… what?" I asked.

"Did you just hear anything that was being talked about?" he growled.

"Of course," I replied.

Zeus raised an eyebrow skeptically. "What was it?"

"Um, you thanked me and Ares for joining the meeting?" I replied, biting back a giggle. Annoying Zeus was so much of fun. And I always got away with it. Why? Because I could always tell Hera about Zeus' latest affairs. It was pretty amusing.

He sighed, exasperated. "You and Hephaestus have to work together on a mission," he said, a hint of humour lying deep in his voice.

"WHAT?" I shrieked, at the same time that Hephaestus growled, "I can do this on my own."

"You need to work together," said Athena, her voice firm. I glared at her. That irritating snob got on my nerves. Always preaching.

"Can't a demigod go?" I asked uncaringly. Who cared about them, unless they were my kids or someone I favoured…

Athena shook her head. "Its too dangerous for them," she said.

I glared at her murderously. "What is this mission?" I snapped.

She launched into the details. "We need to know what Kronos' plans are. He has risen again and will try to overthrow us. He won't make the same mistakes again. We need to plant a bug – a spying gadget – in his lair so we know what he's going to do."

"Why do you need me?" I asked, irritated. I didn't see where this involved me.

"Oh, Aphrodite! Don't you see it?" Artemis exclaimed, all sweet. Grr… Artemis. Stupid good-for-nothing woman who robs boys of beautiful young girls.

"You know of course, that every man's fatal flaw is a beautiful woman," she said. I nodded. "And of course, all men includes Kronos. A beautiful woman could charm her way right inside."

I could see where she was getting at. This made perfect sense.

"And there isn't a more beautiful woman than you – The gorgeous Aphrodite herself!" Artemis cooed, her voice sugarcoated. I was surprised – pleasantly so. Artemis was talking sensibly for the first time in the millennia she'd lived.

"So," Athena continued, putting across the last part of her plan. "What better way than the goddess of beauty to sneak in the hidden microphones?"

"Wait! I found a flaw in your plan!" I said triumphantly. Here came a chance to show the stuck-up Athena that I found a problem with her planning.

"And what is that?" she asked, her eyebrows raised, expression dangerous.

"I'm not good with machines. I can't fix up your machines where you want them to be fixed."

"That's exactly why you need Hephaestus," Athena replied. Her slight irritation made it clear that she'd had this talk before with the other gods.

"But how will I get Hephaestus in?" I asked, rolling my eyes. Shouldn't this be obvious to everyone?

"You need to pretend you're a couple," said Athena. She continued before I could scream at her. "Pretend you both hate the rest of the gods because they don't give you enough importance. Say you want to join Kronos. He'll welcome you with open arms. If Hephaestus alone goes, he wouldn't be accepted, but your beauty can buy us our way in."

"Can't Ares go with me?" I whined.

"No way," Apollo replied. "He sucks at being a techie! He can't program an elaborate device such as this!"

"Then you come with me," I begged.

"Whoa, no way! I can't do the braniac programming stuff," he replied, raising both his hands in the air in a gesture of Its-Out-Of-My-Depth.

"Hermes?" I pleaded.

"Sorry," he replied. "Like Apollo, I can't do the programming. Hephaestus is the only one who can."

I cursed under my breath. There was a long silence.

"I'm not going," I replied finally.

"WHAT?" everyone but Ares and Hephaestus exclaimed, outraged.

"I – am – not – going," I repeated, making every word clear.

"Why?" Zeus thundered. And I mean literally. Thunder and lightning crackled around him.

"I don't want to," I replied matter-of-factly, checking my perfect pink nails.

I could feel everyone's glares on me, but I was unfazed.

"What's your price?" Athena asked me finally. I perked up at that.

"My price," I repeated, a slow smile appearing on my face.

"Yes," Poseidon sighed. "Your price."

My smile grew into a grin. I'd always though Athena and Poseidon made a cute couple, what with all that bickering…

"You'll have to date him for as long as I like," I giggled.

"WHAT?" Athena and Poseidon screamed together.

"You both will have to date. For as long as I like. Like a proper couple."

I could see the things I'd make them do. An intelligent child with Poseidon's waterpowers and looks would be a great addition to the minor gods…

"NO WAY!" Athena screeched and Poseidon glared at me.

"Then I'm not going," I replied, filing my nails where I'd found a small flaw.

"Athena, Poseidon, please," Demeter pleaded.

Athena glared at the ground defiantly.

"Fine," she spat out.

"What?" I exclaimed, delighted.

"I said fine," she replied bitterly.

"What about you?" I asked Poseidon.

"I'll do it. And then I'll kill you," he replied murderously.

I squealed in delight. This would be so much fun! And I could play it up a little more…

"I have another two conditions," I announced. Everyone looked at me warily.

"What?" Zeus asked.

"Firstly, a girl from my choice from the Hunters of Artemis will have to date a guy of my choice."

I got a mad Artemis pouncing on me, messing my hair up. It was like a twelve-year-old girl with silver eyes pouncing upon the most beautiful woman alive.

"You –" Artemis started off, but her brother pulled her off me.

"Look what you've done to my hair!" I said, glaring at her and then fixing it back to perfection.

"Artemis," Apollo said, looking her in the eyes. They had some brother-sister understanding and then Artemis resentfully agreed. I think part of the reason he tried to convince her was because he was hoping I'd make him and Thalia date. It wasn't a bad idea…

"What's your last condition?" Artemis growled.

"Oh, that's easily fulfilled. I just want to give infinite people of my choice makeovers," I squealed. This would be exciting!

Artemis looked horrified. She had a reason to be. I wanted to doll her up and make her look feminine for once.

"You'll do it just for one day," she warned.

"Three," I argued.

"No way!" she exclaimed.

"I won't go with Hephaestus then," I cautioned. Ahh… how I loved this power.

"Fine. Three days," she barked.

"Okay, I'll go with him," I sighed.

Everyone breathed out, relieved.

"Go get ready," Hera told me. "Look as good as you can. And wear something that'll make you look good and help you camouflage."

I nodded. That was challenging. And I loved challenges.

"I'll see you later!" I called out.

"Remember, you and Hephaestus need to act like a couple," she told me, almost choking with satisfaction.

"I know," I replied, wrinkling my nose in disgust.

And then I skipped away to get ready.


How was it?

Tempest Cain will be posting the second chapter!

This has possibilities as a sequel… A Pothena Story. I can feel the creative gears spinning in my head!

Anyway, sequels come later.

Read and Review!

-CainMeetsReality