Notes: Though we're certain the intent of the writers was to give us a wonderfully romantic "love conquers all" kind of episode, we have to confess that we spent a good part of this episode being irritated with Adam (especially for waiting until Brian got hurt before finally listening to Crane and allowing the brothers to rest) and even a bit annoyed with Hannah. Though, to give her the benefit of the doubt we're assuming that, when Hannah was praying for Adam to hurry, she was expecting her hero to show up as part of a search party and not risking the lives of all of the eldest McFaddens. We think that even the poignant look she gives him at the end of the episode reflects that a little. Sure, it's a tender moment between them and the love they share is there but, it seems to be tinged with a bit of incredulity too... like maybe she plans on giving her man a talking to once they get home LOL. With that in mind, here is our offering (and our first collaboration in this fandom) of what might have taken place between the brothers after that talk. We hope you enjoy.
The Recovery (a "WHN" for The Rescue)
by PKatt and May Robinson
Eleven chimes on the mantle clock signaled the late hour, but Crane McFadden wasn't thinking about sleep yet. Not that he wasn't tired. It had only been two days since he, along with his older brothers and Hannah, had returned home from that treacherous ordeal on the mountain and he still hadn't quite recovered. His body was a tight bundle of strained muscles and his lungs still burned with each breath, but it was the endless loop of thoughts invading his mind that squashed even the idea of rest.
Well that and the fact that Daniel would be out on the roads tonight. Might well be now. And the snow was coming down hard and fast. Maybe not as bad as in Winslow or up on that godforsaken mountain. But bad enough to starkly remind Crane that planes weren't the only mode of transportation capable of crashing during a winter storm.
The house was unusually quiet; the rest of the family already turned in, exhausted with the excitement of the last few days. Crane let out a deep sigh, rolling his shoulders in a futile effort to relieve the stiffness invading his joints. Glancing over at the fold-out, a small smile quirked his lips at the sight of Brian and Guthrie curled up together. Out like a light. Those two, especially their youngest, could sleep through anything.
Confident he wasn't going to disturb them he cradled his guitar loosely and began to absently strum one of the ballads he and Daniel had been working on before Hannah's fateful flight. Like sleep, the words weren't coming easy though and Crane set the acoustic beside him and closed his eyes.
Crane had been ecstatic when they'd found Hannah, celebrated along with Adam and Brian, relieved that she'd been alive and unhurt. Relieved they'd made it in time for not only the passengers in the plane, but for the residents of Winslow too. Things had worked out perfectly, but the realization that it could have gone devastatingly the other way haunted him.
And provided the main reason for his current bout of insomnia.
Crane understood Adam's reasoning. He knew Adam would risk everything, including his own life, to save someone he loved. This time it was Hannah, but Crane knew he would have done the same for any of them. Something every one of his brothers would do for one another. They were all selfless that way and it was something Crane loved about his family.
But it was that all or nothing loyalty that terrified him too.
Did Adam not realize what could have happened? What he'd allowed them all to risk? His brother had been single-minded, determined and driven. Truth was Crane had fallen into that trap too, had gotten caught up in the passion of doing whatever it took to bring Hannah home without thinking through the potential consequences. It wasn't until they were at the point of no return, near exhaustion, trudging through the blinding snow and bone-numbing cold, that reality had slammed into Crane.
They could have died out there. All three of them might not have been found until the spring thaw, if at all. Hannah too. And what would that have done to the four boys left behind?
The irony was that those boys were almost exactly the same ages as Adam, Brian and Crane had been when they'd lost their parents. The thought of Daniel permanently 'inheriting this babysitting job' tore Crane's heart in two. The weight of that kind of catastrophe would have required more responsibility than any teenager deserved to have piled on his shoulders. Crane had no doubt the kid could handle it. That Daniel would give up his own dreams, every aspect of his own life to take care of his brothers. Just like Adam had.
Crane also knew Evan and Ford would shoulder their part in taking on the responsibilities of ranching and raising their youngest. Just like Brian.
Yeah, they would do whatever it took; Crane just hated himself for having gambled with their futures. Especially Guthrie's.
Guiltily looking over again at their slumbering youngest, Crane had to swallow the rising nausea when he thought about how much Guthrie would have suffered. How young twelve really was and how quickly their baby brother would have to shed the innocence of childhood. Even without younger siblings to be responsible for it would be devastating to lose the stability of loving adults to guide and take care of him.
Crane knew that harsh truth firsthand.
The swell of emotion from the memory of ten years ago brought tears to his eyes. How could he have not realized the catastrophic loss his brothers might now be facing? And how could Adam have failed to see it too?
A gentle hand cupping the back of his head startled him, briefly pulling Crane from his troubling thoughts.
"You all right?" Adam asked, circling around to sit in an opposite chair. From the concerned look in his eyes he had apparently noticed more than Crane's jittery response.
Crane nodded, trying to be as nonchalant as possible as he wiped at the moisture clouding his vision.
"Yeah." Crane managed to say before his voice cracked.
Crane doubted Adam believed him but was grateful his oldest brother didn't challenge the lie.
"You're up kinda late. You waiting for Daniel?"
Like Adam wasn't doing the same thing.
Crane shook his head though, earning the same knowing look he was sure he'd just given Adam. "Just thinkin'." Crane forced a smile, uncertain whether now was the right time to share his thoughts. His concerns.
"Anything interesting?" It was both amazing and a little unnerving how well his oldest brother could read him.
"Maybe." Crane replied, the debate still going on in his head. Adam looked as weary as Crane felt, but a better opportunity might not present itself again. And it would be best to go ahead and broach the subject instead of letting it build and explode in a frustrated tirade later on.
"We made a big mistake, Adam." Crane hesitated, hoping Adam's mind-reading skills would save him from having to spell things out in vivid detail.
Adam dropped his head, a look of despair or maybe it was shame clouding his brother's eyes.
"I've been thinking about that myself, Hannah too." Crane raised his eyebrow at that and Adam continued. "Trust me; she raked me over the coals for dragging you and Brian along… and she was right. I'm sorry, Crane. That was my responsibility and mine alone."
Crane shook his head. "No, it wasn't just your responsibility; we all love her too, Adam. We just needed to be smarter, thought more about who would have been left to pick up the pieces if we hadn't made it back."
"I know. All I could think about was finding her, getting her home, I refused to even consider the possibility of failure."
"I don't think any of us were thinking straight, and I wanted to go. Brian too. But when we were stumbling around up there, when there was nothing but miles of white and cold, things got a lot clearer." Crane leaned forward, resting one hand on Adam's knee. "All we have is each other, and we nearly took that away from them."
Adam nodded his head before leaning close too. Grief and sincerity were written all over his face and he grasped Crane's hand in a quick squeeze before letting go. "I know that, Crane, I do." Sinking back into the chair, he ran a shaky hand through his already disheveled hair. "When I think of that promise I made Guthrie; tellin' him we'd be back, I—" Adam dropped his shoulders, the emotion clearly stealing his voice. "He deserves better than the future I almost handed him. They all do."
Crane hated to see Adam so distraught; never intended this conversation to pile this much guilt on his big brother's shoulders. He needed to pull Adam back, away from the soul-churning precipice of responsibility he'd constantly found himself teetering on over the last decade.
"So what are we gonna do about it?" Crane asked, though he already had a few ideas of his own.
"That's easy," came a soft, sleep-tinged voice from under the staircase. Crane watched, Adam too, as Brian carefully extricated himself out from under the covers he shared with Guthrie and quietly padded toward them on bare feet.
Crane shared a quizzical look with Adam but, before he could ask their brother for clarification, Brian plunked down next to their eldest's shoulder, facing Crane. Crane wanted to ask how much of the conversation he'd heard but, with Brian's next words, he realized that Brian had evidently heard enough.
"We need a backup plan," he said seriously, an inscrutable look passing between him and Adam before he turned back to Crane. "And you, partner, are it."
"What?" Crane asked incredulously, trying to keep his voice down even as he bristled at Brian's unyielding tone. Was Brian suggesting that Crane sit on his hands, safe and warm under their roof, God forbid the next time one of his family faced a potential calamity?
"Brian's right, kid."
Well, that pretty much explained that mysterious look his big brothers had shared, didn't it? Brian and Adam had already talked about this. And had apparently already made their decision.
Crane wanted to object. Out of pride, if for no other reason. But, if he was being honest with himself, he'd have to admit that he'd come to the same conclusion. When it came to daring rescues, shooting, tracking or any other survival skills, the two oldest McFadden boys had the most experience. After all, they'd had the advantage of their dad's tutelage; Crane having been at first too young and then too absorbed in his school-books to have taken advantage of that life-saving benefit.
"Hey, don't look so disappointed," Adam softly scolded him. "You know you're the only one of us with a hope in hell of keeping this place afloat without the other two around."
"And the only one capable of keeping the boys from killing each other," Brian chimed in, getting up and tousling Crane's hair like he hadn't since Crane's first couple of years at Davis.
Overwhelmed by the faith his big brothers were showing in him, Crane's heart swelled with pride and he couldn't help but wonder if the tears stinging his eyes were a result of that overflow. Deciding he'd better lighten the mood before he risked bawling in front of Brian and subsequently never hearing the end of it, he laughed lightly and said, "I'm not sure if I should be honored or mortified."
Adam laughed at that, though it was Brian who replied. "Take it for the compliment it is, college boy."
Crane did, of course, though soon after was hit with a sudden realization. "Hey, wait a minute. Don't I get any say in this?"
"No," Both brothers answered resolutely, putting up a formidable and united front.
It was no wonder opposing teams back in high-school had dreaded going up against both Adam and Brian. Crane knew better than to argue with them. Besides, this was what he'd wanted, wasn't it?
Except. "Wait, so what if I'm the one you have to rescue? Then what?"
"Then I guess my lovely bride gets to take on this brood of hellions by herself."
"Which means don't go getting yourself lost," Brian chimed in with a smirk. His expression and tone grew more serious though when he added, "Besides, you know we'd have to hog-tie Daniel to keep him at home if you were the one in trouble."
Crane laughed at that though the truth in Brian's words brought on an involuntary shudder. He knew the kid was every bit as tough as his big brothers, still, the idea of Daniel ever getting caught up in a life or death rescue made Crane's stomach flip. "Okay, you've made your point," he said, forcing the lightness back into his voice.
"Good, now that that's settled, what say I make up some hot chocolate?"
Crane exchanged an amused glance with Adam. Their tough-guy brother was mothering them. There'd been a time when Crane had thought he could use Brian's home-making proclivities against him in some way. Ammunition that would let him tease Brian for a change or, better yet, for the other jocks to use against him. The plan had backfired though. Sure, some of Brian's buddies had abused him but, in the end it only made Brian more of a chick-magnet to the girls at BHU.
So instead Crane had just learned to appreciate it. "Sure, thanks," he said with a grateful smile as Adam added his "ditto" to the order.
Even though it was almost midnight now, the quiet between and all around them seemed, well, disquieting. The only sounds coming from Brian as he puttered away in the kitchen or the occasional gust of wind pelting the heavy snow against the windows.
Reminding Crane that Daniel would definitely be on his way home now from his latest gig.
Which in turn explained Crane's current state of unease. It wasn't until the blessed sound of the Jeep's tires crunching through the snow drifts along their lane met his ears did he start to relax.
"Make that four cups," Adam called softly to Brian but Crane didn't miss the relief in Adam's tone.
Or in the, "All right," Brian had just pretty much exhaled.
Apparently they were all waiting up for Daniel.
The prideful kid was gonna hate that.
Crane got up from his chair and headed toward the front door, pausing when he realized his older brothers were on his heels. Turning back toward them he quietly insisted that they sit back down. "He'll think something's wrong if we crowd him," he explained.
Crane knew his roommate well enough to realize that Daniel would think the worst if all of his big brothers were there to meet him at the door. Especially after the scare they'd put Daniel through while they were on their rescue mission.
Though Daniel tended to open up to Crane, this time it had been the kid's silence that had revealed how worried his roommate had been. When they had all finally made it back from Winslow the elation on Daniel's face had been palpable. His moist eyes and fierce hugs reaffirming their little brother's relief. But, aside from asking if everyone was all right and saying how glad he was they'd made it home, Daniel hadn't said two words about the rescue. Had barely even acknowledged Adam's praise for holding down the fort while everyone was gone.
And that told Crane the kid had been beyond scared. That, just like his big brother, the original eagerness to join them had been replaced with the bitter realization that he could have lost half his family up on that mountain. Daniel was eighteen though, so inherently incapable of admitting fear. And fear of failure or of letting his big brothers down were definitely at the top on his list of phobias. It was no wonder Daniel hadn't been talking.
With all that in mind, the last thing Crane wanted to do was give the kid another scare. Grateful for the reluctant acknowledgment he saw in Brian and Adam's faces, Crane turned back to the door as they moved back over to the table.
Getting the door for Daniel, he held it open against the gusting wind as the kid trudged through, his arms laden with his guitar and its amplifier.
"Thanks, bro," Daniel said as Crane closed the door behind him; his voice sounding even more gravelly than usual. Crane was used to the post-gig hoarseness though and didn't let it concern him like it once used to.
First passing the amplifier and then his guitar case to Crane, Daniel shook away the heavy snowflakes clinging to his hair before raising one foot, obviously about to stomp the snow from his boots. Crane's abrupt though whispered, "Guthrie," did the trick, reminding the kid of the late hour and that their youngest was asleep across the room.
"Oops," Daniel said a little sheepishly, his grin bringing a warm smile to Crane's face as he helped him shrug out of his familiar red bomber jacket.
"How were the roads?" Crane asked, mindful of the fact that Daniel hadn't yet noticed their big brothers across the room.
"Ugly," Daniel answered honestly. The kid was flexing his fingers and Crane wondered if a white-knuckled drive had contributed to the action as much as riffing on his guitar had. "I took it slow."
There was a hint of defensiveness in Daniel's voice that time and Crane regretted causing it. "I wouldn't expect otherwise," he replied, hoping his sincerity and the warm hand he clapped on the kid's shoulder would appease him. "So, how about we warm you up with some hot chocolate," he suggested as he began to steer Daniel to their awaiting brothers.
Daniel put the brakes on though, no doubt because he finally saw Adam and Brian sitting at the table; their faked nonchalance obvious.
"You guys hold a family meeting I didn't know about?" Daniel asked and Crane could feel the tension in the kid's shoulders.
"Yeah, something like that," Adam answered as he straightened from the chair and walked toward them. His tone was warm though, his expression equally so and it continued to soften as Adam continued his approach.
Though Crane could feel the tension releasing beneath his palm, the kid still threw him a questioning look. Crane just shrugged his shoulders, relinquishing his grip on Daniel when Adam rested both hands on either side of the kid's neck.
"We wanted to tell you something; something important," Adam said seriously as he lightly squeezed the kid's neck before drawing Daniel into a hug. "We wanted to tell you how sorry we are." Crane couldn't help but notice that, for a usually affectionate kid, he was reacting pretty stiffly to Adam's embrace. His resistance didn't last long though. With Adam's added, "I'm so sorry, kiddo," Daniel practically melted into Adam's hold, his grasp on the back of his big brother's shirt probably even tighter than it had been on the steering wheel on his way home.
Daniel pulled back though, abruptly thrusting out his arm and actually shoving Adam with it. "You should be," he said tremulously, morphing the look of shock on Adam's face into one of tenderness instead. And if there'd been any doubt as to whether or not Daniel understood the reason behind Adam's apology, the kid's, "Don't ever do that to me again," erased it.
"Looks like you're in luck, then," Crane said as he lightly patted Daniel's belly. "The boys here've decided that I haven't yet grown out of babysitting duty, so you're off the hook. At least for a few more years."
Daniel grinned, a subtle exhale of breath revealing his relief. "Good, 'cause I suck at being in charge."
"So I heard," Brian said dryly as he handed Daniel and Crane each a cup of hot chocolate.
"Quit it. You did great," Adam softly chastised them both as he hooked Daniel into his shoulder and finished with an affectionate hair tousle. Though Crane recognized the blush in Daniel's features as one that only praise from big brother could produce, it was Brian's comment that the kid chose to answer.
Indicating the mug in his hold, Daniel replied. "Yeah, well at least I don't have to worry about inheriting your domestic duties… 'Cause you're a natural."
Adam barked out a laugh while Crane desperately tried to avoid spilling the hot beverage he'd foolishly attempted to drink while his brothers were hurling zingers at each other. Setting it down with only a minor amount of splash, he couldn't help grinning too when Brian waved a spoon at their little brother, his expression dramatically put-upon and declaring in his deepest voice, "Just for that, you're not getting any marshmallows."
With Daniel's grin and that absurd giggle, Crane felt the weight on his shoulders lift. His guilt and worry gone. At least until the next McFadden crisis. But until then he could revel in the fact that they'd all made it home in one piece and also rest a little easier… knowing the kids could stay kids just a little longer.
-fin-
