We all know that the future never quiet turns out like we plan, no matter how hard we try. Well Kensi and Deeks are no exception to the rule. A look into one of the ways things could have happened. Something a little different. Let me know what you think.

Learning to Walk Again

Chapter 1

Deeks was sitting in bar downtown with a buddy from work. They had been working long hours and needed a beer or two to unwind and escape from the office bullshit they had to deal with.

Lucas Mitchell was a tall good looking guy around the same age as Deeks. He was married with three children and had a beautiful wife, Sarah, who kept him on the straight and narrow. This woman didn't take crap from anyone, least of all her husband. Deeks would be over for dinner at least once a week or to watch the kids when Lucas and Sarah needed a night out.

Tonight however the two men just wanted nothing more than to knock back a few brews and talk a little round ball. About an hour into a heated discussion on who would and could kick the others butt in a game of one on one, Lucas looked over Deeks' shoulder and noticed a rather attractive woman looking, no, staring at him. At first he thought he was mistaken, but whenever Lucas looked over, there she was looking at them, well actually he figured it was more 'him' than 'them', given she could only see the back of Deeks' head.

"Deeks, there's a hot brunette a few tables back and she keeps staring over at me. I'm pretty sure she's been eyeing me for a while. Should I go over and buy her a drink?"

"Well if you want your life to end when Sarah finds out, go ahead."

"Come on Deeks, a little support here. I maybe married, but I'm not dead yet. What could it hurt to just talk to her? Besides, how is Sarah goin' to find out?"
"Easy, I'm the one that's going to tell her. Come on Lucas, if this girl actually thinks you're good looking, you better check and see if she has a Seeing Eye dog with her."

Deeks smiled and drained the glass of its remaining liquid.

"Ha ha. Very funny, but she's coming over and I bet she's goin' to ask ME to have a drink with HER."

"You're on. Steak dinner, next week." Deeks replied.

"Done." Lucas said as he smiled at the lady approaching him.

Before he could say a word, she spoke and killed any hope Lucas had of a free meal.

"Deeks? Is that you?"

He recognized the voice immediately, turning slowly to face her.

"Kensi. It's been along time." His tone was even and sedate.

"Wait, you two know each other?" Lucas was dumbfounded.

"Yes, she was my partner many years ago, when I was working with NCIS. How long has it been?"

"Almost five years, I think. Seems like a life time."

Kensi studied Deeks closely. He was still handsome with his blue eyes and blonde hair. The scruff was trimmed and neat but the face was gaunt. His smile held no life and the eyes, well… they were flat without shine, like they once had.

Lucas could see how the two were looking at each other and he knew that they not only had history but something else was there, something that still lived on under the surface. Deeks hadn't taken his eyes off her since she arrived at the table and she was locked on to his. He seemed to be mesmerized by her, almost trance like. After a second or two Deeks snapped out it and realized he should make the introductions.

"Oh I'm sorry. Kensi this is a very good friend of mine, Lucas Mitchell. We work together over at LAPD. We run the undercover ops among other things."

Putting out her hand she finished the introduction "Kensi Blye, Special Agent NCIS, nice to meet you Lucas."

Taking her hand and still trying to recover from the shock, Lucas gently shook it saying "My pleasure Kensi. So you two were partners? "

"Yes we were…. Pretty good partners too." Kensi' last words were low and soft but still loud enough to be heard by both men.

Lucas knew he was now the proverbial third wheel, so it was time for him to exit.

"Well Marty, I would love to stay and hear all the great stories you two certainly have, but I'm already late for dinner and I really don't want to get on Sarah's bad side before the weekend even starts. So I'm off. Kensi, great to meet you and you I will see on Monday." Lucas pointed at Deeks before he stood to leave.

Kensi nodded as he got up and walked out of the bar. Looking back down at Deeks she could feel the tension between them and was glad when he spoke first.

"Why don't you sit for a minute and tell me how you're doing."

Kensi was hoping that he would ask her to stay, so she happily sat down.

They had long since stopped being partners, friends or anything else for that matter, but for some reason she still was drawn to him. What she had felt for him those many years ago could not be denied.

"How have you been Marty? Things at LAPD seem to be working out well for you."

Deeks was taking a good look at her. She was still just as beautiful as the last day he saw her those many years ago. Her body was fit and trim, maybe a little too lean for his liking but still a knockout in any one's book. She didn't seem to age at all, however something about her was off. It was the eyes. But what about them?

He broke contact, looked down at his empty glass and asked "Would you like a drink? I'm buying."

"Beer's fine, thank-you."

Raising his arm he motioned to the bartender that they needed two beers.

"I've been better, but all and all, I can't complain. How is Jack and life at NCIS?"

There was no bitterness in his voice when he said the man's name.

He noted a slight twitch at the sound of Jack's name and waited to see how she would respond.

"It turned into a little more than just a mission to save him and his daughter. It got pretty crazy there at times. We were fighting the Taliban on one front and sometimes our own, well CIA assholes, if you can call them the good guys, on the other front." She looked at her hands and then continued.

"We got close again." She looked up at him to see his reaction. There was none.

"I think only because of the situation we were in more than anything else; keeping each other alive. I stayed overseas for another two years once I got them settled and I knew it would be safe for them. I came back home and Hetty welcomed me back." She was going to say something more but thought better of it.

"I'm sorry to hear that it didn't work out."

She knew he was trying to be sincere, but his eyes didn't show any emotion, they seemed empty.

The beers arrived and Deeks took a long pull from the bottle.

Kensi was looking down at the bottle, peeling the label as she asked "How about you? Is there anyone special in your life?" She had an idea of his recent history, but she wasn't sure how things were going and if he had started seeing someone recently.

He looked off into space and for a second; he was a million miles away, lost in thought. Kensi watched him closely and waited. He brought his eyes back to meet hers before speaking.

"I was serious with a lady for a few years but the undercover assignments eventually took there toll on the relationship. It was just too much for her. I didn't like seeing her worrying and upset when I was called to duty."

"That's too bad. What about Monty?" She asked with a little sadness in her voice, guessing the answer to that question.

"I had to put him down about two years back."

"I'm so sorry. That must have been devastating. I know how much you loved him."

"It was his time. He became very sick near the end so it was the right thing to do."

She raised her beer bottle and offered a toast "To Monty."

They clinked bottle necks and drank to their favourite four legged companion.

Looking at one another they realized that so much still hung in the air between them and that neither one of them had fully moved on.

Kensi knew she had plenty to talk to him about, but seeing him again had opened the flood gates of feeling and memories she thought had long since died and had been buried. She knew that if they were ever going to truly heal they needed to get their issues resolved. Yes they still had a few lingering items that needed closure and she wanted to start the process.

It didn't end well all those years ago when she left for Afghanistan and had she handled it differently they wouldn't be here in this bar, feeling awkward and wondering how things could have been.

Kensi was just about to tell him that they should get together and talk things out and put the past behind them when she noticed his eye was twitching.

"Are you okay Deeks?"

"Yeah, just a little headache. With all the shit going down at work I pretty much have one a day. I take Tylenol like candy.

Listen Kensi, it was really great seeing you again, but I need to go."

"Yeah….sure, I'm sorry I... I didn't mean to keep you." She was taken a back by his sudden urgency to leave. She knew he was not comfortable with her and she expected that, but they only had one beer. She had hoped for more time together.

He stood and threw a few bills on the table, nodded to her saying "Take care of yourself."

Before she could get her response out he had already turned and was walking away from her.

"Yeah, you too." She said softly to the figure moving away from her. Sitting back down she didn't know whether to cry or scream, so she just sat and watched him exit the bar. As she finished her beer she remembered how Nell had warned her. 'Don't expect him to greet you with open arms. He's had a long time to move on with his life and he doesn't need old wounds torn open again.' Nell begged her not to see him again, but still Kensi had to try. There was too much that was left unsaid and now seeing him after all those years, she knew that they needed to talk this out and put the past behind them.

Kensi didn't want to re-start their relationship again. She just wanted her old friend back.

It had been too long and she needed him back in her life. Was she being selfish? She sure was. But he was the only man that knew her better than anyone else, even better than she knew herself sometimes and she wanted him in her future, so she was going to fight for his friendship. One thing she did learned when she was overseas and away from Deeks and the rest of the team was that true friends and people you can trust implicitly are very hard to find. She had made up her mind that from now on Kensi Blye was going to run to them instead of away from them.


Walking out of the bar the cool night air caressed his face and it felt good. Between the headache and seeing Kensi again, it was too much to handle. He never really moved on from their partnership, friendship, quasi relationship, whatever it was. He tried, he did his best to find someone to spend his life with but it wasn't as easy as you would think. The dating scenario was complicated at best with undercover work always happening at the wrong time. He had his fill of one night stands and relationships took a lot of work and effort. Furthermore stability in his life was non-existent and that was the driving factor. At least that is what he told himself.

Deeks needed to think about this 'chance encounter' with Kensi, but his headache wasn't getting any better. He decided to head for the beach and take a long walk. Maybe the sea air would help with his head and clear his mind enough to figure out what she really wanted tonight.

Of course he could always call Nell and try and charming her into telling him, but that wasn't going to happen. So a long walk it was and since Monty was no longer there to keep him company, it would be a little lonelier as well.

As he walked he began to remember the beginning of the end of their partnership all those many years ago.

"Deeks, I'm trying to make this work. What's the matter with you?" They were in his apartment finally opening up about their relationship and what the future was going to hold.

Looking at her he could only see the depth he had sank to protect her, to hold her and keep her safe. All he ever wanted was to be with her, but now that was turning into an obsession.

He was actually so afraid of losing her that at times he couldn't think straight and this was one of those times. She was speaking but he couldn't hear her. She was moving around the room, but he couldn't see her. His mind was locked on the thought of her becoming the only reason for him to live. How could one woman have such a hold on him?

He had wished for this day. He had wanted this day to come and he had worked hard for this day when they could admit and talk openly about their "thing", but now that's it here…..

He snapped out of his mini trance just as Kensi was ending her one sided conversation to hear her say:

"I can't do this tonight, Deeks. I just can't. You need to figure out what you want."

With that she grabbed her jacket and left.

Was he over thinking this? Ever since he heard about the three hearts he had been fixated on this and how Kensi had become his life.

Would he behave that way if something really did happen to Kensi? He came close in Afghanistan. Would it be worse the next time around?

He needed to pull back, regroup and take this a littler slower, that's why he returned the knife. It was her turn; she would just need to be patient with him now.

As Deeks returned to his car, he sat for a moment, with his eyes closed and his head down trying to clear his mind before starting the engine and slowly driving off to an empty house and another restless night.

A lone figure stood in the shadows watching intently. As Deeks drove past he thought he saw something move but couldn't be sure. He just chalked it up to his headache and the general mood he was in. Giving his head a little shake, he continued to drive without so much as a second thought as the man in the shadows looked on intently.