Based on: Gintama Anime Episode 87

Warning: GinHiji, Yaoi, First Attempt

Disclaimer by MADAO: I don't own anything, I never do. They took everything away from me. My house, my job, my wife. Even the author took the words out of my mouth.


After Episode is The Gorilla's Secret Indulgence


Chapter 1

Heidi Lurks In Every Chasm to Drag You Down Into Diabetic Overdose

The wind whistles…

Spicy…

It's damn spicy…

For the first time in his 20-something-years, Sakata Gintoki have just witnessed the presence of raw pain and anguish upon a certain face of the most masculine and demonic Vice-commander. The crackers bag held in the bandaged arm of Hijikata Toshiro trembled ever so slightly, reverberating the sniffling sobs made by the man himself. Such snapshot is imprinted upon the mind of the stalking permed silver-hair, accentuating the fragile and vulnerable heart beneath the raven's stubborn exterior. Sakata Gintoki bit into his own spicy cracker and facing the grey-tinged cloudy sky, he muttered ... Spicy.


-Some Days After The Incident-

'Hi⁓Ji⁓Ka⁓Ta⁓Kun…' lilt a certain naturally permed hair. Upon spotting the usually stoic and expressionless Vice-commander relaxing under the shade of the dango stall's canopy, Gintoki has made it his life goal to squeeze Hijikata for his tax money back –even though he has never contributed much in the first place-. A look, and then a stare and soon a sound made from the use of friction between the tongue and the roof of a mouth that made the noise 'Tsk', -a specialty of the Vice –commander-, can be heard.

'Yorozuya, huh… What do you want?' the blue eyes momentarily closed as he lights the tobacco pursed at his lips, inhaling the bitter smoke deep within his lungs and releasing it. Gintoki rests next to him, -right in front of the figure lying with an eye mask covering his face- and nonchalantly order himself a plate of dango, shifting the bill to the police officer next to him.

'Now, now, Oogushi-kun… Here's Gin-san trying to check up on you and make sure that you're ok…There's no need for such cold words and there should be more words of appreciation, right? Gin-san likes it better when he's being spoiled,' spout the man munching on the ball of sweet, chewy goodness, further edging Hasegawa-clothed-Josef closer into falling in to the diabetic ravine where Heidi lurks.

'Who's Oogushi-kun?' Hijikata turns his head; eyebrows tilt closer together as he retorts toward the figure sitting beside him. Inhaling a deep breath to compose himself, once again the Vice-commander languidly brings his hand towards his lips to indulge in his nicotine craving and in the same breath, he exhales the grey cloud of smoke.

'Screw appreciation, I'm not doing anything that you should be worried about so I don't need your "check up". And why should I spoil you? I'm not your Mother. Actually, if I'm your Mother, I will yell at you to get a job and pay for your own dango,' hissed Hijikata. Brows drawn further closer together, Hijikata continues to draw smoke and releasing it within the same breath.

'Oi, oi, oi… don't look down on Gin-san. Even if I'm like this at this age, I can pay for my own dango. It's just that, today, I lost my money in another type of round dango…' A slight pause, then a louder proclamation, 'Don't underestimate Gin-san's inability to pay for anything,' claims Sakata Gintoki with a slight pride as he finishes his dango and moves to currently picking at his nose to flick it towards an indefinite direction.

'That's just you losing your money playing pachinko again, isn't it!? Mothers are looking down on you! I'm looking down on you! I think the whole world is looking down on you!' exclaims Hijikata. Then, a sigh, 'Never mind, I gotta go back to work,' he slowly rises and drawing the last breath from his cigarette, he throws it to the ground and stamps it to smother the flame.

'I thought you've finished patrolling?' questioned the Yorozuya who has drifted into cleaning his left ear.

'No, that was just a forced break. I'll see you around,' and with a little 'clink' of coins and monetary notes, the demonic Vice-commander tiredly left.

From the short exchange of conversation, Sakata Gintoki has noticed of the tell-tale signs of Hijikata Toshiro's aftereffect over his heartbreak. The blue ridges painted around the eyes that indicate signs of insomnia, the slight trawl of his limbs as he stood up showing his period of lethargy and the losing edge to his tsukkomi that shows that the author is not as good as a gorilla. Ignoring the last remark that Gin's mind have inconsiderately inputted, Gintoki ordered another plate of dango and this time shifts the bill to the figure lying behind him who is yet to be scolded by the Vice-commander for slacking on the job.

'I'll pay, but do something about him, Danna. The tension in the barracks feels like walking on eggshells,' remarked Okita Sougo, Captain of the Shinsengumi's 1st Division, whose ambition in life is to usurp the Vice-commander's position and who is currently proposing an exclusive job for the Yorozuya with dango as a down-payment.

'Isn't it a good opportunity to take him down, Souichirou-kun? I thought you were aiming for his good-for-nothing position?' Gintoki lazily munches on his second portion of sweet goodness, seriously tipping Hasegawa-clothed-Josef into a balancing act at the edge of the diabetic ravine where Heidi's eyes glow demonically.

'It's Sougo. Hijikata-san is still not letting down his guard so I still can't kill him. He just becomes more boring with his reactions, Danna. He was a loud-mouthed-mayo-freak-who-should-die-eating-his-dog-food before, but now he's just a mayo-freak-who-should-die-eating-his-dog-food,' the Sadist sighs.

'Uh… I think the part that should be gone is still attached though!? Like, the 'should-die-eating-his-dog-food' part shouldn't be said aloud!? And what's with the long use of dashes?' screams Gintoki.

After a slight pause to compose himself, he remarks, 'Yeah, well… not that I'm disputing the fact that he consumes dog food but it's what they call… that, … you know, ah, GRAVE, the period of time when you mourn for the loss of your loved one. Yeah.' He nods to himself, arms crossed. 'He'll be back to normal eating copious amount of dog food again soon, Souichirou-kun.'

'It's Sougo. And I think the English word that you want is 'GRIEVE'. But Danna, in our line of work, there is no such time for grieving. Going without sleep for days on end can only lower your defences and endanger you in this line of work. Kondo-san even had to force him to take a break,' Okita rises from the seat, 'As the master of lazing around, I'll leave you to do something about it, Danna,' and with that request, the Prince of Sadist left the confused permed head to scratching his head.


A/N: Reference to Heidi and Josef in Episode 94-95.

I hope it's not too OOC and forgive my poor use of grammar as English is not my 1st language.

R&R would be much appreciated