Okay, I really do not know where this came from. I have had a really exhausting finals week, less than 3 hours of sleep on any given night, and way too much monster my system…this is the result. I know it's not really funny, but the idea wouldn't leave my head so I give it to you. Enjoy… be patient. It gets more slashy near the end…

Err… I don't own Heroes; if I did there would be something we like to call continuity in season three.

Things Go Horribly (Fantastically) Wrong

It was as if a light switched on in the room. A twitch of the fingers, meant to send Bennet colliding into the wall, and suddenly everyone knew that some way, somehow, their powers were gone. So fast that Elle missed exactly how it happened, the two men flew at each other with fists flying.

Elle stood there for a second, frozen in shock. The situation was just too surreal. An uncontrollable wave of terror rose as her situation truly sunk in. She'd never felt this weak and insignificant before and she didn't like it, so she did what many people do to get rid their insecurities and weaknesses; she grabbed a gun. It was lucky that Bennet had dropped it to engage in fisticuffs with Sylar instead of shooting him. As she wrapped her hands around the cool metal, she felt the familiar sense of empowerment and superiority that she normally associated with her powers. She was in control now.

She could still get this job done, she thought as she took aim with the gun. What she didn't realize was that the cheerleader wasn't blind and noticed her actions. Despite the fights she and her Dad were in the middle of at the moment, she was still fully prepared to save his life. Unfortunately, Claire was a little slower than the rest and hadn't yet associated the others loss of powers with the idea that a bullet would kill her. Just as Claire prepared to jet into motion, Elle lowered the gun. She was looking at the two rumbling men with a queer expression on her face and she backed up to lean against the wall, still gripping the gun tightly.

Claire didn't know why Elle stopped, but this was her chance to not only save her Dad, but also to prove that she could take care of herself. She slowly and quietly tiptoed to one of the wooden sticks and grabbed it, keeping an eye on the nut job watching the shit get kicked out of her partner. She clutched the stick tightly and positioned herself, winding up just like her Dad had said. Just as she was about to swing, Elle whipped her head to turn and look at her. Claire froze as Elle, the one holding a gun, gave her the once over.

"Twenty bucks on your dad," Elle said in an amused tone. Claire's eyes narrowed in anger…and then her mind caught up and she realized what Elle had just said.

"Umm…wait. What?" Claire asked, blinking in confusion.

"For the fight, I bet you twenty bucks that your Dad just completely fucks up Gabriel. I mean, he's in good shape, but your dad has total experience over him. He was kind of a geek before he got powers, I doubt he's ever actually been in an actual fight without them," she explains, looking at Claire like she's an idiot.

"Isn't he your partner in crime right now, you know. Shouldn't you be on his side," Claire asks, still weirded out by the situation. Elle just gave a little laugh.

"Please. He was just a way out of a bad situation. I really would have done anything to get out of the creepy dungeon. I mean, at first I was all over electrocuting him and that was fun and all, but then I realized I burnt his shirt off or something and well, boy's got a killer body and I'm not gonna do anything more than be a bit handsy in that gross, dirty dungeon," Elle stated matter-of-factly.

"Uhhh…"

"And so we talked for a while, him blathering on about redemption or something, maybe trying to shift the blame for all the lives her ruined…I'm not really sure. I was just saying whatever he wanted to hear. I…don't really recall what that was either, too busy fondling the goods if you know what I mean," she continued with a dirty grin and a wink. Claire reacted to this at least.

"Eww, gross Elle! He's a murderer and a psychopath and…and gross!" she exclaimed, making a downright hilarious expression making Elle chuckle.

"You forget that that's, like, my calling card. 'Elle Bishop- murderer, psychopath, and amazingly beautiful'. But you do have a point. He does seem like the kind to become all needy and then when things don't work out right, murders you instead of just breaking up. But he was saying all this stuff about reforming so I thought it might be okay. Plus, he has a really nice chest, I mean just look at it. I've run my hands all over that," she explains, casting an appreciative look at the two men STILL fighting, neither of them paying any attention to the girls.

"No seriously, don't want to hear that. I mean, I don't want to hear about Sylar doing it with anybody."

"Hey, I didn't do him yet," Elle exclaimed, acting upset at the claim.

"So what, you just molested him and he didn't notice. Seems like you were giving him really clear signals," Claire said, still not believing she was even involved in this conversation.

"Okay, first off, just because you give the guy all the signals doesn't mean he wants to do it right then and there… or ever. Both Peter and Mohinder seemed more weirded out then anything. Although, I think Mohinder might be gay and Peter was turned off 'cause I wasn't related to him… Second off, I happen to be much better at being subtle than I used to be," Elle said, affronted. She crossed her arms over her chest defensively and moved to meet Claire's eyes in a show of defiance.

"Right, you subtle? I can't even imagine," Claire laughed, starting to enjoy the conversation a little. It was better than being shot at, at least.

"Yeah, before seeing you I was visiting Claude and he recommended it. He's very good at it and showed me a couple tricks. Like, I bet you didn't even notice how much I touched you during our little adventure," Elle said with a leer and Claire stepped back a step.

"What, no. There was…why would you touch me? I mean…the only time we touched was when we fought and because of your shocks," Claire exclaimed, disbelieving and a little unnerved.

"Please cheerleader, I went to England and back while I was malfunctioning and didn't down any planes and was able to walk fine on my own to your house. That's not even mentioning all the times you even realize I was touching," Elle said with a sleazy smile, waving her hands around lazily, including the one with the gun.

"I… I would have known if you got close enough to touch me," Claire said with shocked anger. Elle just raised her eyebrow and pulled a necklace out of her pocket. "Where did you get that necklace," Claire spazzed, recognizing the necklace as hers.

"Just another trick Claude showed me," she said, tossing the necklace back to its rightful owner. Claire caught it automatically and, catching a strange look in Elle's eye, decided now would be a perfect time to change the subject.

"So how did you go from groping Sylar to letting my Dad bash his brains out," she asked, hoping to keep the subject away from her.

"Well, it wasn't that hard. Okay, so I thought that Sy, err Gabe at this point I guess, had a really hot body and he was being attentive and all, so since I'm such a wonderful and forgiving person, I decided to give him a shot. I guess it also helps that my powers were inexplicably under control again. And so there I was, trying to figure out a way out of the dungeon, or at least into a cleaner dungeon, when ole Papa Patrelli comes in. Gabriel just leaps to attention, which is not an attractive trait. I don't like needy Gabriel. Plus, old man Patrelli is actually really creepy and pervy. He was like, 'I think the two of you are a good match,' or something like that…I'm paraphrasing. But I'm not gonna some part of Daddy's need to control everything, even his son's love life," Elle spewed angrily and somewhat entertainingly. Claire actually gave a little laugh when she imitated Mr. Petrelli's voice and tone.

"Gabriel got really annoying, really fast too. Like he went from serial killer to Boy Scout…well Boy Scout who has no problems kidnapping innocent teenagers for undefined, but most likely nefarious reasons. So I tried to bring the hotness back and get rid of his Daddy Issues, or at least make those hotter in that brooding way, but it didn't work out. I mean, he killed a guy and two seconds later he's back in the car and talking about repentance again. And now he's looking at me weirdly, like he doesn't trust me and I can only imagine where that leads. Like he has my power so if he got all scorned lover he'd probably do something crazy, like make a pyre with my body on beach in the middle of the night or something. Plus it's fun to watch your middle aged Dad beat him up." And looking at her Dad using Sylar as a punching bag, Claire had to admit it was a little funny.

"So," Elle said, suddenly standing right beside Claire, "how about you (point gun) and me (point gun) get out of here? I saw this motel not too far from here on the way down." Claire missed the second half of Elle's request, though; too busy staring at the gun Elle was haphazardly pointing around.

"Maybe if you set the gun down, it's making me a little nervous," Claire said, not really knowing what she was agreeing to, but anxious now that she knew she wouldn't heal.

"Hey, I'll have you know that I have been sufficiently trained by the company and have hours of experience," Elle stated through narrow eyes, think of the time when her Dad gave her a gun and let her target practice on Adam. At least till she got bored with bullets and blood; she preferred her corpses extra crispy. Nevertheless, she casually tossed the gun in the general direction of the Sylar massacre; at this point Bennet was just enjoying himself a little too much, and locked arms with Claire, pulling her outside.

"Wait, where are we going again," Claire asked, a little afraid (and possibly excited) to hear the answer.

"Let's just say we're giving you the opportunity to feel as much pain and/or pleasure as possible while our powers are on the fritz," Elle replied. She then turned to face Claire and gripped her shoulders tightly saying very melodramatically, "We don't know how long this will last, Claire. It is imperative that you get to feel things you never felt before while you still have time." Claire's daddy issues, after all, were a lot more fun. Who knows, Elle thought as Claire followed her willingly out to the car, she might even turn Bennet's little princess into a villain. Then she wouldn't have to be so subtle….