Chains biting into her flesh. Faceless men with heavy horns surrounding her, judging her. Carved stone rods that spat pain when she resisted. A demon with black emptiness where eyes should have been cut lines of fire into her face then tore her from the alter, holding her limp and doll like form aloft with wicked satisfaction before tossing it into flames.
She awoke with a start, only just managing to choke back her cry of horror. Her scars ached with remembered pain, her body tight and drenched in sweat. The same dream had haunted her for weeks now, and still it left her terrified.
"Inquisitor." The softly accented voice drew her back to reality, though the fog of sleep still clung to her thoughts. She rose to sit on the unfamiliar couch, turning to face Solas. She noted his look of concern and immediately regretted coming to him.
"You saw then." She stated gruffly, already rising to leave.
"I did. This dream, you have it often?"
She scowled and crossed her arms. "For most of my adult life, with varying intensity. Every night and worse, since the Wardens." She could still feel that consuming terror she had experienced when she had found herself in the Fade at Adamant Fortress, and hated herself for her weakness.
"My sympathies. But you must realise that these are no ordinary nightmares, Inquisitor Shokra. You require help to-"
"I have carried them these many years already, basra, they are as much my brand as the scars upon my face. You think that you alone can remove them?" She was surprised by her own anger- she had great respect for Solas, and regardless she prided herself on her self-control.
Before she could attempt an apology, Solas continued cool and calm as ever; "Indeed so. But did Inquisitor Meraad appear in them before now? Or the Iron Bull? These would seem to be new developments, would they not?" As soon as he spoke their names she realised he was correct. She became aware that Meraad had been chained in an identical position opposite her, and that while their faces had been blank, each of the guards had had the body and horns of her lover.
Solas took her silent hesitation as acknowledgement that he was correct, and continued, "It is my belief that your dreams are adapting to fears you have developed towards them that you do not wish to face, and that our encounter in the Fade with the embodiment of terror has amplified them. I do not doubt your strength, Inquisitor, but until you resolve these fears your dreams will continue to haunt you. I am sure you can understand how this could affect your ability to command, and potentially put the whole Inquisition at risk."
Shokra grit her teeth and stared intently at a swirl of colour on the wall, as though it held ever answer. Of course he was right, and she loathed that such weakness was so obvious. Finally she grunted and nodded her head ever so slightly. "What would you suggest?"
"I believe that given your connection to Inquisitor Meraad's mark and your own magical affinity, I will be able to guide you both simultaneously into the Fade. Not the raw Fade," he added quickly as her gaze darkened, "I would not ask that of you, given your past experiences. Rather, I would like to guide you back through your memories to establish where your fears lie. I believe that by going back and establishing the connection you shared as children, it will become easier to explore more clearly the memories that you are suppressing."
She was silent for a long moment. In truth, there was no one she would be more comfortable in undertaking something such as this with than Meraad, but there was a great many memories from her youth that she would much prefer remained buried. That, and she had no desire to return to the Fade again so soon, not even with Solas' expert guidance.
"I…will discuss it with Meraad." She eventually replied. Solas simply nodded, allowing her to leave the room in silent discomfort.
