Written for "I Hate Being A Muggle" and "The Pineapple Force". a) Sorry this is only Sorting, I can go on to Prefects/Quidditch if you want. b) You both complete my life.
"Kara Barnes!" barked Professor McGonagall, placing the Sorting Hat on the head of a pretty first year with short dark hair.
"Gryffindor!" the hat shouted immediately, and Kara, grinning, hurried to the Gryffindor table after handing back the hat.
"Paige Bradley!" McGonagall read off of the list, and looked up to find a first year with long, dark blonde hair staring anxiously at the hat. Paige sat on the stool and let the hat slip over her eyes.
"I love to find!" she thought intently. "Please put me in Hufflepuff!"
"Ah, but your qualities do not match those of a Hufflepuff," the hat responded in her head slyly. "What makes you think I'll sort you somewhere simply because you are a good finder?"
"I FIND this to be appalling! I had better be a Hufflepuff!"
"You would be better suited for Ravenclaw, or Slytherin," the hat mused, thinking to itself that this girl was nothing like a Hufflepuff.
Paige tensed up and began to argue stubbornly inside her head with the hat, demanding that she be put in Hufflepuff. To everyone else, it looked as though she was a time bomb about to explode any minute, but the hat was stubborn too, and she had to argue with it tirelessly.
"What's wrong with you, hat? I hate you! Why won't you just put me where I know I should be?" she thought angrily, wishing that the hat would just grant her wish.
"Because that's not who you are! You would be much better off in Ravenclaw, or Slytherin maybe! Certainly not Hufflepuff!" the hat replied indignantly. Did this little eleven-year-old really think it didn't know what it was doing? Sorting was the Hat's life! It knew where every person belonged!
As the thought argument grew more and more heated, all of the students and professors seated, as well as those students waiting to be Sorted, were becoming impatient. Twenty minutes had passed already with this one witch! They should be far into dinner by now!
Half an hour later, right when Paige was tempted to yank off the Sorting Hat and tell it that it needed new Sorting lessons, Professor McGonagall strode over to give the hat a stern talking-to. Just before she reached it, Paige thought, "Make a new house for me if you have to! I am a good finder and I'm proud of that!"
And just as Professor McGonagall reached forward to take the hat off of Paige's head, it shouted loudly and angrily, "PAIGELPUFF!" The entire Great Hall looked to be in shock; what was a Paigelpuff?
The newly sorted witch grinned broadly and headed to the far corner of the Hall, where a tiny desk had been wedged just after the hat had shouted. Her plate filled with food as soon as the last person had been placed into Slytherin, and, much to the Hat's relief, it had been taken away. Paige dug in, hoping desperately to be a prefect for Paigelpuff and maybe even the captain of the Quidditch Team!
If you really have no idea what a Paigelpuff is, I apologize, because your life is not complete yet. But I do encourage you to review! And to "I Hate Being A Muggle" and "The Pineapple Force," you're welcome. Tell me what you think! (:
