"Huh?" Narumi stared at the huge box in front of him. "What's this?"
He carefully examined the box and found a note. In a finely written penmanship was:
This machine is a job-compatibility machine. Find the perfect job for your students. This will prepare them for their future. Test it to be sure.
-III
Three? Triple-I? Who's that? It didn't matter. Narumi took the box and placed it inside. On top was a big red button. He pressed it.
Poof. The box opened, revealing a small machine that looked like a printer with many buttons. Just as he was about to press some random button, a manual popped out of its mouth. On the cover was:
In case you plan on pressing some random button, don't. Unless you want your house to explode, then be my guest.
He laughed. It was as if the person who sent this thought that the one who will be using this was extremely stupid. He flipped through the pages of the manual, nodding every once in a while. At the last page of the manual was a brown envelope. He opened the envelope and saw about 60 pieces of paper.
He took one out and realized that it was an information sheet for the machine. You'll be filling up some information about yourself and place it on the machine as soon as you finish it. Testing it out himself, he filled up the form.
Name: Narumi Anjou
Alice: Human Pheromone
Gender: Male
Star-rank: Three-star (during his student days)
Age: 25 ;)
After filling up the form, he inserted it on the mouth of the machine and pressed the green button. The machine made a few weird noises before spitting out a smaller paper. Narumi took it and read it.
Your future: Gakuen Alice Teacher
You and I both know that you are a teacher. You already are a teacher. And, lying is bad. You're 32.
Below was a very small message:
Is this machine accurate or is it not?
The blonde laughed at the result and said to no one in particular, "I wonder what my beloved children's jobs would be? This is interesting."
He decided to bring his newfound possession to class tomorrow.
…
The next day, Mr. Narumi came to class extra early. As usual, Yuu was the first one to enter the room. He looked at the teacher, confused. "Mr. Narumi? What are you doing here? It's not yet 7:30."
"That's a good question, Yuu." Narumi smiled. "I just couldn't wait to go to class today. I have an activity for you guys, you see. I got excited."
Yuu laughed nervously at the glint in his sensei's eyes. "I see. Well, then, I'll be sitting down now."
"Please do," Narumi said, still smiling.
After a while, students started coming in, getting surprised at the odd teacher grinning on the teacher's table. Since Yuu was the first one to enter the room, almost anyone who came in would approach him and whisper, "What's up with him? How long has he been there?"
Yuu would only smile at them. "He's been there before I entered the room. He said he's excited because we'll be having an activity."
Almost everyone would then look suspiciously at the teacher, then go to his or her seat, feeling weird. When Mr. Narumi was excited, they knew something bad and/or was about to happen.
When Hotaru entered the room, she ignored the teacher and simply went to her seat. When Natsume and Ruka arrived, however, Mr. Narumi gleefully greeted them.
"Good morning, you two!"
They both ignored him. Natsume shifted and whispered to Ruka, "What time is it?"
"7:10. Why?" Ruka asked.
"He's early," Natsume said, going ahead to his seat. Ruka followed suit.
A few minutes after the two came, Mikan arrived, greeting everyone as cheerfully as she always did. "Good morning!"
Some greeted back while some just groaned at her loud voice. It took her a while to notice that her beloved teacher was in the room already.
"Why are you early, Mr. Narumi?" She blinked and pointed at the machine. "What's that?"
Narumi tapped the printer-like thing and said, "It's something we're going to use in a while." He stood up. "Yuu, is everybody here?"
"Yes, sir," the ever reliable Yuu answered.
The blonde clasped his hands in excitement and immediately closed the door. The glint in his eyes was filled with mischief. "Do any of you have an idea on what the thing on my table is?"
"It's a printer!"
"A copying machine!"
"No one cares."
He shook his head and said, "No. This baby right here is a job compatibility machine—" "Is that reliable?" –well, I was going to that. I tested it. It was accurate. It even found out what my real age was."
"Anyone can guess your age. You're 40," Hotaru said calmly.
Some snickered while Mikan kept telling them, "He's not! He's 32!"
Again, some laughed. Narumi clapped his hands once to gain everyone's attention. "We're getting side-tracked, everyone. Now, now, please settle down if you want to know what your future holds."
"Isn't it Otonashi's job to know that?" Koko asked, snickering beside his buddy, Kitsunume.
"Guys, you're 17 years old—"
"Hey! I'm 16. You always forget that."
"Fine. Sorry for being insensitive, Koko. Most of you are 17 already. Please settle down so that we can do this, okay? "
The room grew quiet. "Okay, so I'll be distributing a form for you guys to accomplish. Answer honestly. I don't want to see made-up information, okay? It knows."
The paper was distributed in a rush to make them answer the form immediately. When Narumi was sure that everyone was finished writing, he said, "Okay, since you guys are done with the form, fall in line and place your form in…" he pointed at the mouth of the machine. "…here."
And so the class did. After a few weird noises, it spat out a smaller piece of paper every time a student placed their sheet in the machine's mouth. They then sat back to their seats, busy reading the result of the job compatibility machine.
Some groaned, and some, well, everybody except Hotaru groaned. Mochu peeked at Natsume's paper and said, "Look, Natsume, your paper says you're going to be a fireman."
"Oooh, Natsume looks hot in a fireman suit. It complements his eyes," Sumire said, in which the other fan girls agreed with her.
Natsume rolled his eyes. "This is stupid. Aren't firemen supposed to extinguish fire, not make them?"
He turned to Ruka and said, "What did your result say?"
Ruka showed his paper, looking really dejected.
Your future: Dog Scooper
You are a man close to animals. But, you are much closer to their poo. Have fun scooping!
Mochu stared at it and stifled a laugh. He patted the blond's back. "Wow, Ruka. I couldn't imagine you scooping dog poo in the park, but hey! Life's full of surprises!"
"Just because your paper says you're going to be a big-shot mafia lord doesn't mean you can be as cocky as one."
Ruka raised his hand and said to the teacher in front, "There must be something wrong with that machine. I can't possibly become a poo scooper. I'm supposed to be a vet!"
Hotaru shook her head and shrugged her shoulders. "The result says it all, Nogi. You can't argue with the machine. It's far more superior than you are. Besides, you're too much of a wimp to handle animal blood. Dog poo, on the other hand... I think you can manage."
A random student burst out laughing while reading Koko's result, "Haha! Koko's result says that he's going to be a sociologist! What a boring job!"
The mind reader took his paper back and screamed, "There's no way I'm letting that happen! I hate understanding people's feelings and knowing whatever things socio-whatever the hell that is know. I'm going to be a carny!"
"Dream on, Koko! You may look like a circus freak, but you'll never be a carny. You're too lanky to be one! Might as well be a sociologist," Sumire obnoxiously remarked.
"Circus freak? I thought that was you?" He scoffed when she tried to throw her chair at him.
When he read her mind, he grinned at her and said, "Oh. Wow. I think you're right about me not going to be a carny. You should be. I mean, aren't detectives right about these stuff? Haha. I can't imagine you being one, but seeing as the machine chose it for you… I think you'll be just okay. Actually, now that I think about it, it suits you! You love to snoop around and you practically live and breathe the life of stalking!"
"I don't stalk!" Sumire stuck her tongue out at him.
"Yes, you do," Natsume said.
Sumire stood up from her seat, flailed her arms in the air, and started squealing, "NATSUME-SAMA JUST TALKED TO ME! HE TALKED TO ME! HE TALKED TO ME! HE TALKED TO ME! HE TALKED TO ME! HE TALKED TO-"
BAM!
Silence. Then, people started talking to each other again, ignoring the unconscious fangirl on the floor.
Anna glared at her paper and said, "This can't be accurate! I'm not going to be a waitress."
Nonoko peeked at her paper and frowned. "We got the same result! I'm not sure if I'm going to be glad about it."
"What?" Anna was on the verge of tears. "Neither of us is going to be famous? I'm getting depressed. This feels worse than getting ignored by Mr. Misaki."
Most of the children started complaining and groaning and getting angry at the machine. They were Alice students, for crying out loud! The elites and the prodigies were made here! They weren't going to let the stupid machine tell them that they'll only become poo scoopers, waitresses, firemen and mafia lords!
Just as they were going to crash the bloody contraption, they heard a small, high-pitched squeak. They all turned their heads to the one who made the noise. Mikan.
They all stared at the brunette as she turned paler than usual, staring at the small piece of paper. Her eyes started glistening, a sign that she's about to cry. Her lower lip trembled, and her shoulders shook. She looked pitiful.
But all Koko did was burst out laughing. He laughed as loud as he could. He couldn't help it! Tears started falling from his eyes as he continued to laugh. Mikan only glared at him before staring at her paper once more, too speechless to say anything.
Koko, who was finally back to his senses, snatched the paper from the girl and read her result out loud.
Your future: Don't bother.
Don't bother looking for a job. No one will be dumb enough to hire you.
You'll probably become a fireman's housewife and, seeing as your future husband would be a pervert who has a fetish for childish underwear, you'll have more than a dozen adorable fireman babies.
He'll probably be rich as hell, too. AND, you'll live happily ever after, so…
Aren't you a lucky girl?
As soon as the mind reader was finished reading the paper, the class roared in laughter. Mikan had the worst result in the whole class! Sure, she wasn't the brightest bulb in the class, but the machine was just harsh! Still, they couldn't help but laugh at it.
Natsume was clearly amused. He had that huge smirk on his face. He nudged the brunette beside him and said, "Well, at least you'll be married to me. Aren't you lucky? We should start making our fireman babies now to fulfill the machine's prediction on our kid count. Don't worry. And, I know how much you wanted to live near the beach. I think I can give you that."
Some squealed at the fire-caster's blunt, but somehow sweet statement. Mikan could only squirm in her seat and cry.
…
"Wasn't it too harsh… you know, what you made the machine print out for her?"
"No."
"B-but she looked hurt."
"You need to calm down. Look at the positive side. With your best friend's amusement, they'll probably end up together in a week."
"I guess you're right. But, I still can't forgive you for putting poo scooper as my future job. I mean, why not an assistant vet, at least?"
"Hmm. It'll sound too good to be true. It's either that or inventor's househusband."
"Touché."
…
After 15 years…
The batch has long graduated and was living their lives in the outside world. Mochu did end up a mafia lord, with Nonoko as his wife, who didn't end up a waitress. Yuu was now a senator, and he and his chef of a girlfriend, Anna, were taking things slow. Koko gave up on becoming a carny and pursued sociology, thus becoming a sought after sociologist. He was so into it that even Sumire, his wife, was forced to take it with him. Hotaru and Ruka were now living in France, with her company, III, becoming the highest earning electronics company in Europe and Asia. Ruka owned an animal shelter and an animal hospital.
As for Natsume and Mikan? No, Natsume wasn't a fireman. He was the CEO of the largest food company in Asia, the Blazing Dots. No, they didn't have a dozen children. They had 2 beautiful kids, Youichi and Aoi (named after his little sister). No, Mikan wasn't a housewife. She was an entrepreneur. Under Blazing Dots, she opened different stores that would appeal to all types of people.
The machine may not have gotten the exact prediction 15 years ago, but one thing was sure… They lived happily ever after in their beautiful house by the beach.
End.
