The Nine Times Sirius Black Nearly Killed Remus Lupin

Remus was drawn to Sirius' reckless nature from the moment he saw him sorted. While Remus stood huddled with the other first years, he watched in awe as arrogant Sirius Black approached the Hat and smirked as it fell upon his head. A moment passed before the Sorting Hat screamed "Gryffindor."

Sirius smiled widely, and Remus felt his heart skip a beat. The Great Hall had gone deadly silent and everyone was staring. Sirius confidently marched over to the Gryffindor Table and took his seat before sticking his tongue out at the Slytherins. James Potter began cheering wildly and the rest of the Great Hall joined in. Sirius was being clapped on the back by older Gryffindors and smugly looking around at everyone staring at him. Remus had no idea what the big deal was, but he was impressed. Impressed at Sirius confidence, at his arrogance, at his electric nature. Remus couldn't begin to imagine being that sure of himself and felt inexplicably drawn to the other boy. He wanted to understand him, be friends from, learn from him.

Over the course of the next nearly twenty-five years Remus learned a lot about and from Sirius Black. He learned that Sirius was not nearly as confident as he seemed, but he loved fiercely, cared deeply, and was unfathomably loyal. He learned the warmth of another's embrace, the burn of being hurt by someone you trusted unquestionably and the joy of true forgiveness. He learned what it means to love someone without boundaries and without doubt. What it feels like to know that someone loves you back with every inch of their being. He learned what it feels like to be willing to die to save another.

Most importantly Remus Lupin learned that he was doomed to love Sirius Black. And that Sirius Black was the deadliest person he would ever meet.


The First Time Sirius Black Nearly Killed Remus Lupin:

Some Basic Background Information on our Protagonists:

The four Gryffindor boys became fast friends their first year. They were bound together by a common desire to laugh. Such a simple thing, but in increasingly dark times, and with increasingly complicated lives, it cemented them together. The Gryffindor First Years quickly became known as the Marauders for their cunning, daring, and general tomfoolery.

James Potter was a natural born leader from a loving family. His parents had waited their whole lives to have him and he was spoiled rotten. His Father was a retired Auror and his Mother a retired Mediwitch. They were incredibly wealthy, one of the last remaining pureblood families, and incredibly generous. So while James was rich and sometimes a brat, he loved deeply and thought well of most people.

Peter Pettigrew came from a middle-class family. He had a younger sister and lived with his Mother. His Father had abandoned them when Peter was very young. But his Mother worked hard and provided a good and safe life for her two children who she loved very much. Peter was a follower, who wanted approval from his friends more than anything else. He was very loyal, especially to James, who had taken him much like a little brother.

Sirius Black was a powerhouse of a personality. Loud, ambitious, arrogant and cunning, most people didn't understand how he did not get sorted into Slytherin. But those that knew him best, the Marauders, quickly learned there was much more to Sirius then he let most people see. Sirius' parents had been strict, brutal in their child rearing techniques and fanatical in their beliefs. Sirius was a natural born rebel. He had been questioning his parents since he could talk and dreaming of going to Hogwarts to get away from them, to make his own friends, and cut his own destiny. But as strong as Sirius was he could not escape the damage of such an upbringing. He had learned to present himself brashly and proudly. But underneath his tough, uncaring exterior was a deeply sensitive soul who needed the approval of his friends and their love to feel any kind of real confidence.

Remus Lupin was always a bit of a mystery, even to his friends. He was quiet and quick-witted. He had come from a loving family and was an only child. He had grown up in a rural town, with few friends and little money. Most people couldn't understand how Remus fit into the group, but the funny thing was he was one of the most essential members of the Marauders. While James was all ideas and Sirius was all energy and gusto, Remus was the voice of reason. He took the time to take their plans and make them into attainable pranks and plots. He was clever, and cool-headed under pressure. Without Remus, the Marauders would not have been nearly as successful as they were.

Which is why the three other Marauders found themselves in a real pickle second year, when they started to question his monthly disappearances.

"Maybe he was leukemia?" said Peter quietly as Sirius paced around the room angrily.

"What in the bloody hell is leukemia?" James as from his bed.

"It's a muggle blood disease. It requires monthly treatment. That could explain it."

"He doesn't have leukemia, Peter," Sirius snapped.

"Just an idea, no need to yell at him Sirius," James said.

"It's a stupid idea. We know what it is. He disappears once a month, always around the full moons. He comes back looking sickly and has killed off more family members then I can count with his lame excuses. He's a werewolf. Now the question is what do we do about?" Sirius asked.

"What do we do about it? I expect nothing," James replied firmly.

Sirius looked exasperated, "Nothing? Nothing? You're fine living with a blood thirsty beast?"

James sighed and got calmly off his bed to walk towards Sirius. "Sounding a lot like a Black now aren't you? He's not a blood thirsty beast. He's our friends, who happens to turn into a wolf once a month."

Sirius looked at James alarmed. "You know my parents are wrong about most things but the entire wizarding world agrees there's something wrong with werewolves."

"The entire wizarding world is wrong then. Look Sirius, has Remus ever done anything to scare you?"

"Well, no. But still…"

James pinched the bridge of his nose, "Has he ever been anything but the best friend to you? The most helpful person in our year?"

"Look, Remus is great. Or I thought he was. He's probably just acting James and now you're going to get caught in his web," Sirius screamed.

James grabbed Sirius wrists and pulled him close to whisper dangerously, "Remus is one of our best friends, Sirius. That is not an act. He cleans up after our messes, goes to detention with us, and brings us chocolate when we are sick. It is NOT some elaborate scheme to lull us into his web. That. Is. Remus. Our Remus, who gets torn apart and destroyed by something every month. Our Remus who feels like he can't trust us with this because he's scared we'll react EXACTLY the way you are reacting."

Sirius looked taken aback, "Remus shouldn't be scared of us…"

"No he shouldn't… or at least he shouldn't be scared of me or Peter. YOU, are acting exactly as he feared you would," James snapped back.

"I see your point," Sirius replied dryly, "Where is he now anyway? It's not the full moon any longer."

James looked around, "He always comes back a day or two later. I suspect he's in the Hospital Wing recovering."

"I want to go see him," Sirius said.

James looked a little alarmed, "Yea, that could be good… or really bad. Are you sure you're ok with this now?"

Sirius shrugged, "My parents weren't right about mudbloods, half-bloods, Potters or Gryffindor. Who's to say they're right about this?"

James smiled and walked over to his Invisibility Cloak. "Let's go then."


"Why do we even need the Invisibility Cloak? It' not after curfew yet?" Sirius asked annoyed, as Peter stepped on his foot for the 10th time.

"Remus is not going to want to see us. You know how he is, he's going to try to avoid talking to us about it, probably deny the whole thing. We need to sneak up on him to confront him," James said firmly.

"So we're basically attacking him? That should help his mode," Sirius said sarcastically.

"Shhh," Peter whispered as they approached the Hospital Wing doors.

Peering inside they could see one cot had privacy sheets pulled around it near a window. All the other beds were empty and Madame Pomfrey was nowhere to be seen. The three Marauders began creeping towards the bed cautiously. James froze before it and listened carefully. He glanced at Sirius who shrugged his shoulders because he could hear no noise either. James took a deep breath pulled back the curtains.

Laying before them was Remus. Cocooned in blankets and sleeping soundly, he had an array of ugly cuts and scars all over his exposed skin. Sirius took a sharp breath as James took a brave, unsure step forward. "Remus," he said softly, "Remus can you hear me?"

Remus' eyes flickered a little bit and James took a seat on the bed. Sirius was still frozen in place, he's eyes flashing over the wounds that covered his friend. "Why didn't Pomfrey heal his wounds?" Sirius whispered.

Hearing Sirius voice, Remus opened his eyes slowly, "Sirius," he said hoarsely, "What are you doing here?"

"How are you feeling Rem?" James asked.

As Remus looked at Sirius, James and Peter he sat up straighter, wincing and grabbing his ribs. His eyes flashed quickly as he came to his senses and Sirius could see how shallow his breathing had gotten. He was panicking, Sirius knew and took a step forward to help his friend. "Don't move Sirius, please," Remus whispered.

Sirius froze and James looked at the injured boy quizzically, "We know Remus, and we don't care."

"Know what?' Remus asked softly looking around the room.

"That you're a werewolf," Peter whispered and Remus moved quickly trying to swing his legs off the bed but winced immediately.

James grabbed his shoulders which caused Remus to whimper in pain. The black haired boy dropped his hand quickly looking at Sirius for help. Sirius just stared at Remus as a bit of blood began to seep through his shirt near his shoulder and ribs.

Remus was staring at Sirius desperately, "I'm not a werewolf. I just… I just was on my way to visit my Mother when I fell down the stairs and I've been in the Hospital Wing since then."

James sat on his hands, clearly concerned he would hurt Remus further and said, "Please don't lie Remus, we don't care. We love you anyway. You're one of our best mates."

Remus looked at him shocked and then at Peter who smiled weakly and Sirius who was still staring at Remus in horror. Remus chuckled softly and said, "You may not care James but Sirius does. He hasn't stopped staring at me since you came in."

Sirius' eyes snapped up and he took a definitive step towards Remus. Remus leaned away from the grey eyed boy as if afraid Sirius would hit him and smiled sadly. "I'll move out tomorrow. James you may not care but most of the World does and I can't blame Sirius for looking at me the way he is. But I'm not going to live with it, or force him to. I'll leave."

James glared at Sirius who shook his head and leaned down in front of Remus. The werewolf locked eyes with him as Sirius raised a shaky hand to wipe away some of the blood that was oozing from a cut on his face, "What happened to you Remy?"

"The wolf happened to me," Remus whispered quietly without taking his eyes off Sirius.

"Why doesn't Pomfrey fix you up proper?"

Remus looked thoroughly confused now, "Werewolf wounds, they don't heal like other injuries. It can't be fixed with magic. But I natural heal quicker than most people so they'll be gone by tomorrow."

"I hate it," Sirius whispered.

"I know, I said I'll move out," Remus whispered back as James moved uncomfortably next to him.

"No," Sirius said firmly, "No I hate IT. The wolf, not you Remus, never you."

Remus looked confused, "But Sirius, surely in your lessons you learned that I am the wolf and the wolf is me."

Sirius shook his head and put a hand on Remus head, "They told me that Remus. But I know you, and the wolf did this to you because you won't let it hurt other people. You do this, every month to save other people. That's the bravest thing I've ever heard. You're the bravest person I've ever meet."

Remus looked shocked, "Sirius, I'm an animal. I could kill you in a second."

Sirius grabbed Remus hand painfully, "Don't you dare ever say that in front of me Remus. Don't you dare. Your brave and strong and I'm going to find a way to protect you."

Remus stared at Sirius and felt his heart skip several beats. He smiled slowly, sure that Sirius Black was going to be the end of him by the way his stomach was flipping and tying into knots. But damn it if he didn't believe Sirius would find a way to help him. And in that moment as he smiled shyly at Sirius, he thought he was going to die from happiness for having such amazing friends.


A/N: This story should be done pretty quickly. I already have it outlined and have the summer off to work on it. It's going to move pretty quickly through the years and lead all the way up to the 'Lay low at Lupin's house' incident. I will not be writing about Sirius death (most likely) because it is just too sad for me to bear.

Reviews are greatly appreciated!