A/N: This is a series of drabbles that may or may not be connected it is MelloXMattXMello and is here to clear out the little plot bunnies that are in my head and need to be thrown out before I can finish my current stories, the update for W.A.H.N.T.H.A.C is on it's way...just..a little more patience I'll try to have it up..tonight.
Disclaimer: Don't own it, have never owned it, and will never own it.
Warnings: Swearing(duh), drug use, possible suicide, ect. for the entirety of this. Yaoi will be here but no lemons(i think)
Through My Eyes
~Mail~
Soft pale skin, slow breaths, soft lips, blonde locks spread across my pillow, lashes just a shade darker casting curved shadows over his cheeks hiding the sapphire orbs that were so often ignited in fury or passion. He was beautiful and prerfect and everything I'd ever wanted and could never have.
He was Mello.
I sighed and gently tugged off his boots and slipped his vest off, careful not to wake him as I folded the leather neatly and put it to the side, touching his shoulders lightly and smiling faintly.
His pants were next and I was gently in sliding them over his hips, freezing when he stirred, but eventually I got them off and forced myself not to just sit and stare at his naked perfection, slipping a pair of lose sleep pants on him and pull my blanket around him.
He was so tired he hadn't noticed whose bed he'd stumbled into and so I sighed and brushed my lips against his hair, as close as I'd ever get to a real kiss, turning and heading to the living room to curl up on the couch because I wouldn't dare lay in his bed.
Staring at the blank wall, tracing the cracks in the plaster I felt the familiar hopeless emptiness in my chest, pain pulsing slowly through my, a tingling burn in my fingers and up my arms.
I gripped the couch slowly, blankly, old cuts decorated most of my body, but I couldn't add to them, Mello could wake any moment and he'd be pissed if he knew what I was doing to myself.
I hated this feeling, hated that i had to make myself bleed to deal with it, but Mello was like an angel, a fiery beautiful avenging angel, that had fallen to earth and I was Matt, lowest of the low, Matt who shouldn't have ever even been worthy of the angels notice.
His light, his beauty shone so bright I could hardly stand it and I was dank, pointless, dull, next to him i was nothing, I could never hope to have him like I wanted him, like so many had wanted him. I would never dare to soil that bright beautiful light.
I swore loudly, looking down at my arm, in my thoughts I'd scratched into my skin and blood was dripping slowly down my arm, I pressed my sleeve against it, biting my lip hard and not realizing an angel was watching me with glistening tears rolling down his cheeks slowly.
