DISCLAIMER: I don't own Ultimate Spider-Man.

A/N: This takes place at the beginning of season 2.

That Stupid Stone

The team was on another, typical mission, fighting the Juggernaut. Actually, they had just defeated the Juggernaut, and were exchanging high-fives when Spider-Man tripped, and fell down, his teammates laughing at him.

"Ouch," Spider-Man said, rubbing his back as he stood up. Iron Fist bent down and picked up the thing his friend had tripped on: a stone.

"Tiger, look at this," Iron Fist sounded puzzled. White Tiger caught it as he threw it to her, but before she could examine it, Nova snatched it from her, running into Power Man and dropping the stone on his foot. Suddenly, the stone vanished, and everyone stood there, blinking, and wondering what had just happened- the only trouble was that they couldn't quite remember.

When the team arrived back at Peter's house, something odd happened. Ava was on the computer as usual, Luke was upstairs in the bathroom, Danny was looking for his yoga tape, and Sam was playing a video game. Peter, however, was laying on the kitchen floor, screaming.

Everyone instantly jumped up, forgetting about whatever they were doing, and rushed to the kitchen (Luke wearing only a towel around his waist). "What's wrong, Web Head?" Ava cried in alarm.

"I- I can't find my blocks!" Peter babbled. His friends stared at him.

"Perhaps his chi is not alined? I could help," Danny suggested.

"Na, this is way too weird even for him," said Luke.

Peter pouted. "Danny stole my teddy bear!"

Danny suddenly stuck out his lower lip. "I did not steal your teddy bear! That would be mean."

"Oh yeah?!"

"Yes."

"YEAH!"

"YES!"

"YEAH! YEAH! YEAH! YEAH! YEAH! YEAH! YEAH! YEAH!"

"YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES!"

"YEAH YEAH YEAH YEAH YES-"

"Made you say it!"

"Did not!"

"Did too!"

Ava gaped at the boys. "What the- since when does Danny argue with Peter? Over a word?" Her expression changed to one of anger. "Danny's right. 'Yeah' isn't a word, Peter Demeter!"

For a moment, Sam was speechless, before exclaiming, "I've got to get this on tape!" As he removed his phone from his pocket, Ava snatched it from his hands and started chewing on it.

"Hey! That's mine!"

Luke stared, then thought for a minute, and yelled at Danny, "You took my phone!"

"I did not."

"Did too!"

Danny's lower lip trembled as his eyes filled with tears, and he sat in the corner, sucking his thumb. Ava took one look at her friend crying and offered Danny Sam's cell phone, which he gladly accepted, summoning his iron fist and smashing it to pieces. She clapped her hands, jumping up and down, when Peter fell on her from the ceiling, where he had climbed to escape from the chaos.

Meanwhile, Sam had discovered the cupboard full of candy, and was flying around the house throwing caramels and suckers left and right while shouting, "CANDY! I FOUND CANDY!" and shoving the Twix in his mouth. His friends soon untangled themselves and began crawling on all fours, eating the candy right off the floor.

Despite the fact that they were all high schoolers, they weren't doing a very good job of 'acting their age', as Aunt May found when she walked in the house two hours later, her arms full of groceries. "Peter, honey, could you give me a hand here?" She received no response.

In the kitchen, she found Sam curled up underneath the table, fast asleep. His face was stained with chocolate- just like the walls. Oh dear, May thought to herself. I'll really have to talk to Peter about this... Being May, she felt too guilty waking Sam, so she put the groceries away herself, then went to the living room to read a book.

However, the situation in there was even worse. The walls were painted with peace signs in caramel, not to mention stick-figure drawings of people punching each other and a dragon in a cave. The television had a Wii remote stuck in it. May sighed. I do always tell Peter to wear a wrist strap. The stuffing from the couch was plastered to the ceiling with some white sticky material that reminded May of spider-webs.

As May walked into the hallway, heading upstairs, she tripped over somebody- Danny. He was in his underwear, slumped over in the middle of the corridor, snoring lightly. His hair was dyed purple with grape juice, of all things, and a smashed cell phone resided in his hand. I always thought him a rather peaceful boy, too, May thought rather faintly.

She started up the stairs, to the bathroom for a hot bath. The trouble was, Luke was (fast asleep) in the tub, in a towel, his face painted with what May sincerely hoped was salsa or hot sauce. The mirror was covered in strawberry yogurt, and the towels had been sprayed with her best perfume. May decided against a hot bath, and collapsed onto her bed, resolving to talk to Peter about his friends.

It was quite lucky that she didn't see Ava mummified in spider webs, decorated with lipstick, stuck to the garage ceiling, or Peter laying amongst the dented walls, beside the scattered weights. It was lucky, indeed, that Fury realized Loki's prank and had Thor repair the damage before anybody woke up, leaving it to the young heroes to believe it was a really weird dream.