The weak one by Violet
Warning- Kinda slash.though she's really a girl.
Note- I hate cha people! (Cha, meaning stuck up snobby, you went to high school, you know what type i'm talking about) The results of a very boring cha party I attended for some reason.also it's midnight so no yelling if it's crappy. Pizza and Yougurt late at night give me the yukkies.
Ping. He's small, pigheaded, incompetent.a troublemaker. He takes shortcuts whenever he can. He's an outcast from the rest of the men and he never can quite get going fast enough. Stupid Ping. Being so annoying and yet.so cute.
I must be going crazy out here, in the battlefields with out any women around, but there's something about that boy that appeals to me. He's not soft, sweet-smelling and meek like a girl. The opposite in fact. We all are. It's pretty much a requirement for men of war. But.I understand that. I understand men, and despite my father's lectures on finding a good wife, I still don't understand women or think I ever will. They're just too totally different. But.Ping.I think that's what makes me notice him. He's built like a girl, all hips and pouting lips and dark hair, skinny long limbs.But he's strong like a man, talks and acts and jokes like a man. Like a warrior.
I can't believe I'm thinking these things about one of my own officers. How will I ever make my family proud if I can't even marry well? I'm certainly not going to become a war hero with these men. Ping used to be the very worst. I'm proud of him, though I try not and show it. He's gotten much better. We don't talk, none of us do, but I wonder what his life was like before this. What sort of man was his father to let him grow up so weak? Maybe his father's dead, and he's the man of the family there. "
Ping stares at me, all the time. He won't meet my eyes. Could he be feeling it too? Every time I touch him to realign his bow or correct a form, he shivers. No. That can't be it.he must have figured out how I feel and be disgusted. It's unnatural.
I'd better go to bed soon. The candle is dying, the light is fading and I'm so tired of turning this around and around in my head. I'll just forget about it. I'll push all thoughts of Ping out of my thoughts, I will not dream about him again tonight. I won't think about kissing him, feeling those well-muscled arms wrap around me, that odd voice of his calling my name, whispering to me. "I love you Captain…love you."
