A/N: So I've been in a huge writing stoop, recently… like, it's really bad. Anyway, I've been writing a few things of different genres/shows/games/whatever, trying to get out of the stoop, and I ended up writing this AU, so I thought I'd post it for the Attack on Titan/SNK fans. This story is purely for fun, and in a completely alternate universe… in truth, the inspiration for writing this is because of binge-watching the Youtube series Survey Corpse and thinking, "Shit, this is really sad. Why must everything I watch be sad? I'm gonna write something not sad."
And then this story was conceived. So there.
This story contains drug references (pot brownies, specifically), alcohol, Jean being a dick, innuendo, and some other stuff that you would expect, listening to a conversation between a bunch of college-level teenagers. The only truly established relationship in this is Sasha/Connie, while this story is mostly based on the relationship between Bertholdt and Annie… other than that, it's all a damn mess.
Anyway, enjoy this, uh… experiment? I don't know, anymore; just enjoy.
Breaking Armin
"Shit, man…" the muscular one said, his blond hair sweaty from the heat that filled the room like a furnace, "can't you turn the fan on?"
"I already told you, Reiner," Jean murmured, fanning himself with a stack of papers, "the power's out. I have to pay the bill."
"Then pay it," he responded, raising an eyebrow as he sat back in the green recliner.
"The hell do you think I am, made of money?" he grumbled, wiping the sheen of sweat from his forehead with the back of his hand. "It was this or the water bill, and I'm not going a week without showering."
"Why not?" the short, bald young man asked, his mouth full of Doritos. "I've gone longer."
"That's disgusting, Connie," Eren replied, narrowing his eyes. "Damn, you wonder why the girls don't hang out with us…"
Reiner laughed, rolling his eyes. "That, and they prefer hanging out with Armin," he muttered, glancing over at the blond who was sitting on the couch between Jean and Eren. "I bet they dress him up like a doll, while he's over there…"
Armin frowned, scratching his head. "That's not true, Reiner… I-I guess they just prefer me, since they know that I'm not one to give away the details to their private conversations…"
Jean perked his head up, raising an eyebrow. "What do you mean, private conversations?"
Nearly everybody in the room set their gaze on Armin (with the exception of Eren and Marco), clearly interested.
The coconut-headed young man sputtered for a moment, like a car running out of gas. "I-I…" he mumbled, his face turning red.
"Has Mikasa said anything about me?" Jean asked, to which Marco laughed and Eren narrowed his eyes.
"Oh, come on, perv," Eren murmured, "at least wait until I've left the room…"
"Eh, you're the only one who can get a good word in for me," he answered, smirking.
"I can come up with a few different words, but they're not exactly good," the brunette replied, rolling his eyes. "If it's any consolation, she hasn't mentioned you once since you two met, so at least you know she's not talking shit about you, behind your back…"
"I dunno," Marco answered, smiling, "I think that Armin would be the best resource to figure that one out, from…"
"I wouldn't want to invade their privacy…" Armin began, tapping his foot as he looked over at Jean. "I mean, they're all really nice to me, and…" He paused abruptly, raising an eyebrow as he pointed to Jean's makeshift fan. "...Is that my term paper?"
"Yeah," Jean answered, shrugging. "Why?"
"J-Jean!" he yelped, grabbing the stack of papers from him and straightening them out on the coffee table, "I can't believe you! It's in its final stages, and you're getting it all sweaty…!"
"Oh, perspiration doesn't stain…" he remarked. "Anyway, it's not like they're going to fingerprint it and get you kicked out over the suspicion that I wrote it."
Reiner, Eren, and Thomas all let out a huge, hysterical guffaw, clearly mocking him as he glanced over, glaring in their general direction.
"As if you wrote it;" Thomas laughed, wiping a tear from his eye as he slapped his palm to his forehead. "The number of characters in the heading of the paper is probably higher than your IQ, alone, Jean-y boy…"
"Oh, shut it," Jean answered, kicking his feet up onto the table as Armin frowned, and the others continued to laugh.
They were interrupted when a tall figure entered the living room from the kitchen, handing out a beer to everybody but himself and Armin as he sat down near Reiner, nodding as he was thanked by most of the boys.
"Why don't you ever grab one for yourself, Bert?" Reiner asked, twisting off the cap from the bottle of beer and taking a big gulp out of it.
"Eh, I'm not really big on it," he answered quietly, smiling softly. "I tried some when I was younger, but I never really liked it…"
"I think you might like it, Bertholdt," Marco replied, grinning as he sat up taller. "I used to not like it much, either, but I ended up trying it again, and it's not half bad to me, anymore."
"I don't know…" he answered, rubbing the back of his neck.
"That's fine," he responded, shrugging. "Armin doesn't like it so much, either."
"That's because he can't handle it," Jean answered, snorting as he tried to twist the cap off to his bottle, only to find that the bottle clearly read that it wasn't a twist-off bottle. "Bertholdt, you're, like, seven feet tall; you'd be fine with just one, if that's what you're worried about."
"Connie's shorter than me, and he drinks," Armin protested, slouching forward slightly as he pouted. "I just don't care to ruin my brain cells, when they're all I have."
"Jean, neither of them have to drink, if they don't want to," Marco spoke up, frowning.
"I don't see what the big deal is," Connie butted in, grinning as he sat on the floor, trying to take the bottle cap off with his teeth. "I mean, I've been sneaking this stuff into school since we all met in Mr. Shadis's class, and I'm perfectly fine."
They all stared at Connie for a moment, glancing at each other curtly and deciding to avoid the elephant in the room.
Suddenly, Jean had a stroke of genius, and he sat up suddenly, causing Armin to flinch.
"I got it!" he spoke up, the coldness of the bottle numbing his fingers. "Armin, Bertholdt, you're both gonna give it a shot, alright?"
"My finals are coming up, Jean," Armin replied, frowning. "I have to study, or else I'll probably end up completely messing up…"
"Are you kidding, Armin?" Eren laughed, rolling his eyes. "You're probably the smartest kid in that course. I wouldn't be surprised if you had your paper completely memorized, by now… I don't think it's such a bad idea, Armin. Maybe you'd loosen up, for a bit… you know, before your hair starts falling out. You know the girls love it; you can't lose that."
He raised an eyebrow. "They do…?"
Connie laughed. "Yeah, totally. Sasha made a point of mentioning how adorable you are, when she first met you…"
They all laughed, and Armin grinned bashfully, rubbing the back of his neck.
"Well…" he muttered, "at least I get to hang out with the girls ten times more than any of you."
"I dunno…" Reiner muttered, smiling cheekily as he looked over at Bertholdt. "I heard somebody's been spending a lot of time with Annie, lately…"
"With?" Connie asked, raising an eyebrow. "Or… on?"
Bertholdt's face turned red, and he denied this quickly as Reiner chuckled, slapping him on the back.
"No, no," Berthold murmured, his face bright crimson. "Annie and I are… just friends. I don't think she likes me, that way..."
"She put you in the friend zone?" Connie asked, raising his eyebrows.
"There's no such thing as the 'friend zone', dumbass," Jean remarked, rolling his eyes.
Eren shrugged, swirling his drink around in his bottle. "Whatever… I'm pretty sure that Annie hates my guts, anyway."
"I'm pretty sure that Annie hates everyone's guts, to be fair," Armin murmured.
"She's not bad, once you get to know her," Bertholdt spoke up, his voice soft.
"I'm sure she's a really nice person," Marco laughed, smiling. "You can't judge a book by its cover, right?"
"I guess," Eren shrugged. "I thought Armin was a girl, when I met him…"
"You what?!" Armin asked, his eyes wide.
"I think everyone did, really," Reiner laughed. "But you're cool, Man… just, uh… with very feminine features."
Jean laughed, nudging Armin as he offered him his beer. "Maybe you'll forget about it…"
Armin frowned. "Oh… but I was supposed to study for my English finals, tonight…"
"What's Shakespeare's hometown?" Eren asked, leaning back in his chair.
"Uh, he was born on Henley Street in Stratford-upon-Avon, which is in Warwickshire, England...:"
"Ernest Hemingway's first novel?" Reiner questioned.
"The Sun Also Rises."
"Brief summary of the War of 1812," Connie added.
"W-What?"
"I think you're going to do just fine, Armin," Eren decided, flashing him a confident grin. "Bertholdt, you should give it a shot, too! Maybe you'll get the courage to ask Annie out."
"Yeah, Bert!" Reiner enthused, a big smile on his face. "You really like her, don't you?"
"Sure," he remarked, "but I'm still not so sure… what if I say something stupid?"
"We've got you covered, Bert!" the tall blond answered. "We'll make sure you don't say anything stupid."
"Are you in, Armin?" Jean asked, smirking as he looked over at the second-smallest one there. "I think you can handle it, if Connie can… you need to relax, for once, anyway."
"I don't know, guys…" Armin sighed, clearly torn.
Connie grinned, laughing. "I say you do it, Armin. Give it a shot, and if you don't like it, then you don't have to drink any more."
He pursed his lips, thinking to himself for a few moments as he closed his eyes.
Finally, he gave a quick nod, grabbing his term paper and carefully placing it into his backpack. "I'll do it."
…
Eren's House
"A-Alright," Armin began, sitting beside Bertholdt as Eren set a can of beer in front of each.
"We'll start off easy," he proclaimed, to which Armin nodded, clearing his throat.
"You can do it, Armin!" Marco encouraged him, smiling brightly as he leaned on the counter.
Connie laughed, crossing his arms. "You both drink on the count of three," the short boy announced. "Ready? One… two… three!"
They both quickly brought the cans to their mouths, and Armin downed as much as he could, pretending that he was drinking a soda and ignoring the taste of the stuff.
After about half the can was gone, they both pulled away, hacking as they all cheered for the two of them.
"Alright, Armin!" Eren exclaimed, laughing as he slapped him on the back. "I didn't think you had it in you! That wasn't so bad, huh? You wanna finish it?"
He laughed, feeling lightheaded as he tried to catch his breath. "It still doesn't taste that great…" he responded, "but I guess it's not too bad…"
"What do you think, Bert?" Reiner asked, grinning.
"It's alright," he replied, smiling slightly. "I guess you were right, Marco…"
"What do you think, Armin?" Jean asked, his arms crossed. "You wanna up the ante, just yet?"
"Uh… I don't know…" the little coconut hesitated, rubbing his arm.
"We're not asking you to shoot up heroin, Armin," Connie added, laughing to himself. "Vodka isn't too harsh, really… it doesn't have much of a flavor at all, especially when you mix it with something else…"
"Like what?" he asked innocently, tilting his head slightly.
Jean got a sort of devious grin on his face, and he leaned onto the counter, face to face with Armin. "You like chocolate milk, Kiddo?"
…
It didn't take much time for Bertholdt to get blackout drunk, and even less for Armin to do so.
Immediately, a certain someone decided to get Armin to spill the beans while he was capable of giving away some secrets.
"So what do the girls usually talk about?" Jean asked, raising his eyebrows as Armin laughed, hiccupping.
"It depends, really," he stated. "They have a pretty wide range of topics, I'd say… the last time I talked to them, Annie was talking about Bertholdt…"
"Really?" he inquired, knitting his brow. "I barely ever hear her talk, as it is…"
"She's a little bit more open, with them," Armin explained. He wiped his mouth, realizing that he was drooling. "I heard her say that she really likes him…"
"Has Mikasa said anything interesting?"
"She doesn't talk too much, either… she hasn't brought you up, if that's what you're asking. B-But," he hiccupped, "Ymir saw you flirting with Mikasa, and she brought it up…"
This, obviously, piqued his interest. "Well… what did she say about it?"
"She asked Mikasa if she had feelings for you… which she doesn't," Armin explained, taking another drink. "However, almost everyone there acknowledged that you're good-looking, and that they would date you, if your personality weren't so unbearable, sometimes."
"...I can't tell if I should be flattered or incredibly offended."
"At least you know that, if you dropped the snarky attitude, then at least one of them would at least consider dating you..." he pointed out, to which Jean hummed to himself.
"I thought Sasha was dating Connie, anyway," Jean thought aloud, rubbing his forehead.
"Nuh-uh," he disagreed, shaking his head. "They're just really close friends."
"What about Mina and-"
"Thomas? They broke up."
"Hmm..." he muttered. "You said that Mikasa wasn't interested... Do you think she could be? If... I acted differently, maybe?"
He shrugged, his cheeks bright red as he looked over his shoulder at Bertholdt, who was currently attempting a kegstand. "Maybe. All she's really interested in is taking care of Eren… I'd say that, maybe if you got on his good side and she were to hear about it, then you could stand a chance. Annie did refer to you as, 'kind of a dick', though, so I'd try to tone that down, too."
Armin looked over his shoulder again, laughing. "What is he doing…?"
"Kegstand," Jean replied curtly, nodding. "Thanks, Armin."
With that, he wandered off somewhere, seeming to be in deep thought.
The others all cheered loudly as Reiner and Eren lowered Bertholdt's legs from the air, and the tall young man chuckled, hiccuping and wiping his mouth as Thomas slapped him on the back.
"That'll loosen you up!" he exclaimed, his cheeks pink as he laughed.
"What do you say?" Connie asked, grinning deviously. "You think we should give Annie a call?"
Bertholdt snorted, rubbing his eyes. "I-I guess so, yeah." He grabbed his phone from the front pocket of his jeans, amazed that he hadn't lost it, yet, as he blindly looked through it.
After a moment, Reiner rolled his eyes, smiling as he took the phone and looked through Bertholdt's contacts, pushing the call button. "It's alphabetized, Bert."
"I doubt if he can recite the alphabet, at this point," Thomas pointed out.
The phone rung a few times, and he pushed the speaker-phone button. A groggy voice picked up.
"H-Hello?"
"Hey, Annie," he muttered almost incoherently, sniffling. "It's Bertholdt."
"Bertholdt?" she asked, yawning. "Bertholdt, it's almost 2 AM… what is this about?"
"I called because it's super important," he answered curtly, stumbling over his own words briefly. "I couldn't wait to bring it up."
"Bert…" she muttered, "are you drunk?"
"Only, like, 20%," he replied.
"That's bullshit," she murmured, clearly tired. "Judging by your voice, I'd say you won't remember any of this in the morning."
"I dunno," he replied, hiccupping, "but I need to tell you something."
"...Why don't you just say it, then?"
"I have to say it in person."
She let out a sigh, audibly in disbelief that she'd woken up for this.
"Alright," she remarked. "Where are you, anyway? You definitely don't need to be driving, right now…"
The young man rubbed his eyes. "I'm over at Eren's," he told her. "I can wait out front, if you want…"
"I'll just come and see you," she responded sleepily. "You'll end up getting hit by a car. I'll be over in 5, alright?"
"Okay," he agreed, to which Connie shot a fist into the air in victory. "See you then."
"See you then."
Annie hung up, and everyone cheered, slapping Bertholdt on the back and congratulating him.
"If she likes you enough to drag herself over here at 2 AM," Marco began, "then you've definitely got a pretty great chance, Man."
"Ah, Bert's got it down to a math," Reiner chuckled. "She's got a thing for him, I can tell."
"I'd take it easy, if I were you;" Connie laughed, "Annie's probably the toughest person I know."
"Please," Eren began, rolling his eyes, "my sister's got stoicism down to a fine art."
"Yeah," Reiner began, "but she's adopted, so we know that it's not in your blood…"
Connie stifled a laugh, stretching his arms above his head. "Yeah… didn't you cry back when we went to see that one movie, about the dying dog…?"
"Everybody cried during that movie," he retorted, rolling his eyes as Thomas and Reiner both laughed.
"I didn't," he stated matter-of-factly, shrugging.
"That's because your heart's made of ice."
Marco looked over at Armin, who was humming something to himself as he swirled around the drink in his cup.
"How are you doing, Buddy?" he queried, smiling.
Armin nodded, not completely answering the question as he stepped off of the barstool and nearly fell over. Eren rushed over, holding onto the blond boy's shoulder as he laughed, helping him over to the couch.
"You alright, Armin?"
"I think Jean's thinking of flirting with Mikasa…" he murmured, rubbing his eyes as he grabbed the empty bottle that was sitting on the coffee table and tried to take a swig of it.
He rolled his eyes. "I don't even think he likes her. I think it's all just a conspiracy to piss me off for the rest of my life."
"Hey, Eren!" a voice called from the hallway, and he sighed deeply.
"What is it, Jean?"
"I wanted to know if you wanted to hang out, tomorrow night," he began, walking over to the couch and plopping down beside Armin. "How about a double-date?"
"Jean, neither of us has a girlfriend."
"Then you'd better get a girl fast, because I already made reservations."
"Is this about Mikasa?"
"No, this is about us. I've been a prick to you for a long time, and I wanted to make it up to you… your sister just happens to be invited."
"Oh, come on, Jean-!"
Without warning, Armin suddenly sat up, leaned over the side of the couch, and threw up.
Eren looked absolutely disgusted when he realized that it was all over his shoes, and he groaned, walking off towards the bathroom in utter disdain.
Jean frowned, grabbing a paper towel from the kitchen and handing it to Armin. "Eh… you alright?"
"No…" he replied, burying his face in a pillow as he wiped his mouth and curled up into a ball.
After what must have only been a few minutes, there was a knock at the door, and all of the guys in the living room began to chatter over at Bertholdt, heckling him as he laughed softly, pushing past Connie and heading over to the door.
He pulled it open, finding Annie standing before him, clearly having dressed in a rush, as her hair was out of its usual ponytail and messy.
"Hey, Bert," she murmured, rubbing her eyes. "You wanted to talk?"
"Hey, Annie!" Connie exclaimed, pushing his way into the doorway as he laughed.
She raised an eyebrow, looking at Bertholdt. "You're all drunk, huh?"
Bertholdt chuckled, suddenly losing his nerve when he realized that he was actually looking at her, face-to-face.
"So… what? Did you call me for the hell of it, or…?"
Reiner grinned from a few feet from the door, looking over at her. "He was kind of nervous, so we decided to help him out, a bit…"
"You don't have to tell me about your gay fantasies, Reiner..."
He rolled his eyes, smirking. "He wanted to talk to you, so we gave him a few drinks to loosen him up."
She looked up at Bertholdt again, having to crane her neck to meet his gaze. "Well… what's this about, then?"
"Uh…" he began, rubbing the back of his neck. "How about we talk about it outside…?"
Annie nodded. "Yeah, sure," she responded, stepping out of the doorway as he followed behind her, closing the door.
He paced around for a second, clearly nervous as she looked over at him.
"What's up?" she asked, her brow knit. "You sounded a lot more enthusiastic, over the phone…"
"Y-Yeah," he laughed, stopping finally when he noticed the guys making kissy faces at him through the window. "I mean, they're the ones who talked me into it, really…"
"About what?" she inquired, stone-cold, as per usual.
"See, I was talking about you to the guys," he remarked. "N-Not because I brought it up, but because Reiner mentioned that we'd been spending a lot of time together, lately… a-and Reiner made the suggestion that… th-that there was something more to it- N-NOT that I'm saying there is; I'm just quoting him on it…"
"What's your point?" she asked, raising an eyebrow as he swallowed hard.
"They said that I should talk to you," he murmured. "I figured that I would…"
"But did you want to talk…?"
"O-Of course," he interjected. "You… you think I should keep talking? Because I can shut up, if you want me to…"
She shook her head. "No… what was it you wanted to talk to me about?"
Bertholdt took a very deep breath, trying his best to ignore the boys in the window, some of whom were writing incredibly inappropriate messages to him through the steam from their breaths on the glass.
"Annie… I-I really like you," he admitted, not meeting her gaze as his face turned red. "And I know that you probably don't like me, which I understand, but I really needed to tell you."
The blonde paused, considering this as she bit her tongue. The guys in the window waited anxiously as Bertholdt felt himself break a sweat, waiting impatiently for her response.
A few moments passed, and none came, so he forced himself to speak again.
"So…" he choked out, his face profusely red. "A-Are you going to say something? I'm really sorry if I made you angry, Annie, I just-"
He was cut off abruptly when she stood as tall as she could, a hand on the back of his neck as she locked her lips to his, to which the boys inside all began to cheer loudly.
She heard this and let go of him, turning on her heel to find Eren, Marco, Jean, Thomas, Connie, and Reiner staring back at her, their eyes wide. A few walked off in the other direction as a few others seemed to apologize before quickly scurrying off.
The young man put his fingers to his lips, his face dark red as she crossed her arms, feeling herself blushing as she tried to hide her face.
"I, uh…" she stammered, coughing into her hand. "I should be getting home, now… I have school in the morning."
"Right…" he muttered, hardly paying much attention as he gazed down at her, perplexed.
"I'll… see you tomorrow, okay?" Annie asked rhetorically, to which he nodded.
"Of course…"
She began to walk off towards the curb, where she had parked her car, only to slow down after a moment. "Hey, uh… Bertholdt?"
"Yeah?" he asked shyly, his face warm as he looked over at her.
"...Call me, alright?"
A big grin spread across his face, and he nodded, lowering his gaze. "Yeah… y-yeah, of course, Annie! Of course…"
"See ya…"
"See ya!"
With that, she got into her car, starting it up as he opened the door, wandering back inside as everyone (except for Armin) crowded around, yelling wildly as they all laughed, celebrating.
"You did it, Bert!" Reiner laughed aloud, taking a big drink of his beer.
"If you can tame the shrew," Connie began, chuckling, "then this calls for a celebration in your honor."
He raised his glass high above his head, cheering, "To Bertholdt!"
They raised their drinks above their heads. "To Bertholdt!"
"By the way," Thomas began, snickering as he looked at Bertholdt, "it's kind of hilarious, seeing you kiss Annie..."
"Yeah," Jean remarked, laughing. "You may have to buy her a step stool, this Christmas..."
"It's like seeing a Chihuahua and a Giraffe," Connie remarked. "I mean, how are you two going to-?"
"Alright, alright," Bertholdt spoke up, his cheeks red. "I get it..."
"We're proud of you, Bertholdt," Eren declared, grinning as he grabbed his arm. "Just don't throw out your back trying to look her in the eyes..."
Jean smirked to himself. "She's like 5 feet tall, right? And Bertholdt's over 6 feet?" He snickered, taking another drink. "You think it still counts as 'going down south', or would she be heading towards the North Pole...?"
"ALRIGHT, I GET IT," the tall young man blurted out as everyone laughed, clearly at the point where they'd probably give a breathalyzer test alcohol poisoning.
"Don't tell Annie that we mentioned it, okay...?" Marco muttered, laughing nervously. "I think that the girls probably have enough of a grudge against us..."
"Well, they'll have an even bigger grudge, once they find out that we broke Armin," Reiner remarked, glancing over at the young man, who was draped over the arm of the couch like a towel.
"Nah..." Eren remarked thoughtfully, "we'll have him cleaned up before he sees any of the girls again; I guarantee it."
As if by command, a knock came at the door, and everyone looked over.
Bertholdt wandered over towards the sound, slowly opening the door and not being sure if he should have been relieved or terrified when he saw that it was Annie.
"Hey," she murmured, clearing her throat, "I figured that, since I'm here, I'd ask how things are going on the partner project that we were working on..."
"Oh, right..." he murmured. "You... wanna come in?"
"Sure," she replied, somewhat surprised that practically every guy she knew was at the get together.
Annie stepped inside as he closed the door behind her, covering her nose after a moment.
"Ugh..." she muttered, "Eren, your house smells like shit."
"If it's any consolation," Reiner spoke up nonchalantly, "that's actually vomit..."
She wrinkled her nose. "Ugh... how much have you guys had to drink?"
"Bertholdt and Armin had the most, I think," Marco remarked, rubbing his neck. "I, uh... think that the smell is Armin's doing, though..."
Bertholdt frowned, muttering something about grabbing Annie a beer as he scurried off towards the fridge in the garage.
She furrowed her brow, walking over to the couch where Armin had blacked out, drooling all over himself.
Annie looked over her shoulder at the guys. "...How the hell did you morons convince him to do this?"
"Convinced him that he didn't need the extra time to study for finals," Connie remarked. "It worked, I guess... hopefully he forgets about all of this."
"He's one of the few people who keeps you all from being your stupid selves," she grumbled, rolling her eyes.
"But you don't think that Bertholdt is stupid, right?" Jean asked, smirking boldly.
"Well, no, of course not... w-wait..." she looked back up at him. "Get that shitty look off your face, Seabiscuit."
"Are you two already planning your wedding?" he asked, unfazed by her words.
"I don't know," she started, "I wouldn't want it to intersect with the date of your wedding with a cardboard cutout of Eren's sister. Then again, you'd probably just put a wig on Marco, change your last name to Ackerman, and call it a day..."
"Oh, shut up, daddy issues," he muttered, to which she raised an eyebrow.
"Your complete disregard for your loving mother is more worrying, I think... is that why you all gathered for this sausage fest?"
Reiner smirked. "You think we had anything better to do on a Saturday night?"
"I thought it'd be better than this," she stated simply. "At least call up Ymir and Krista and enjoy the fact that somebody's getting laid, tonight..."
"Yeah, Annie," Eren remarked, "because your infamous for being a party animal..."
"If I can smell vomit before I even make it to the living room of the house," she began, "then you're doing something incredibly wrong."
"Or incredibly right," Connie spoke up nonchalantly, smirking.
She rolled her eyes. "That's hardly even debatable," Annie remarked.
"If you think it's such a sausage fest," Jean remarked, grinning, "then how about you invite some of the girls from your dorm…?"
"Very few of them would tolerate this," she spoke up.
"Sasha would," Connie pointed out.
"She's not much of a girl…"
"Neither are you."
"Not the point. I'm not waking them up at 2 A.M. for your party… if you can even call it that."
"Oh," Eren spoke up, "does Annie Leonhardt actually have some sense of compassion for others?"
"Sorry for not being more of an asshole like you, Eren," she remarked coolly, "I just try not to piss off the people that I spend so much time with."
Reiner smirked. "You could just move in with Bertholdt," he chimed in cheekily. "I'm sure he'd be up for it, anyway…"
"You're going to keep that up?" she muttered, scowling.
He shrugged. "Only if you keep denying it."
"Who says I was denying anything?"
"Ballsy move, Annie."
"Whatever… I don't have to answer to you."
"But you've got Bert wrapped around your finger," he explained. "You could kick him in the balls so hard that they recede into his body, and he'd still crawl back to you."
The vast majority of the guys cringed at Reiner's statement, and she shrugged.
"Is that what happened to you, Reiner? I'm starting to think that you just want us together because you can't get laid, yourself."
"Or maybe Bert's my friend, and I want him to be happy?"
She frowned slightly. "How... how long have you known that he...?"
He snorted, rolling his eyes. "He's had a crush on you since elementary school... when we celebrated Valentine's Day at school, he always gave you a special card, you know..."
Connie smirked as Annie thought to herself briefly.
"Yeah... he mentions you pretty often. He's got it bad, that one..."
After a moment, Annie bit her lip. "Alright... I'll invite some of them over," she explained. "But only because I don't want to deal with you assholes, myself..."
"You're staying?" Marco asked, smiling.
"Only for a bit," she answered curtly, grabbing her phone from her pocket. "I'm pretty sure that some of them are still awake, anyway... you guys owe me big time."
