Zexion has angered Vexen one too many times. Will he survive the cruelty of the Savage Nymph? Or will he give in to the suddenly sexy smelling members and furniture that are pulled into the fray? AU/Humor/OOC/Eventual Pairing (that will most likely disappoint you :p)/Rating may rise... o.o
Hello there! Welcome to my first fanfic! No wait! Don't leave! Please? I promise I used spell check!

Anyways, yeah, I'm mainly doing this in order to better my writing skills, so please, feel free to criticize any mistakes. As for the story, I honestly don't know where this will be going. I've got some ideas and an ending in mind, but I'm still working out things in between. But I guess I'm aiming for a comedy in a slightly AU setting with mostly OOC characters. Whee. Also, keep in mind, I usually don't have time to write much, so please buckle up for long waits. Sorry, but that's just how life is.

But enough of this crap. I don't own any characters... blah blah blah... I hope I did this intro thing somewhat right. Oh well. On to the story... thingy... o.o


Prologue

"No," came Zexion's simple reply as he slipped out the door and closed it behind him with a soft click.

Vexen was not amused. In what Lexaeus mentally called 'the angry goose dance,' the blonde scientist grit his teeth, growled, and flapped his long sleeves about. The Silent Hero was smart to keep his silence, but at these moments, it was hard for him to keep a straight face.

"Neophytes! They are all the same! Haughty, ignorant, selfish..."

The insults went on for a while as usual when there was a fight between Zexion, the true leader of the 'basement team,' and Vexen, the elder and self adorned ruler of the lab. This time was no different from all the others. Though Lexaeus had stumbled in upon the end of their little spat, even he could assume that it obviously had something to do with either orders, experiments, different hypotheses, or just generally getting tired of one another after toiling for hours on end. It was also the little things, he noticed too that seemed to set them off. Unwashed test tubes, misplaced samples, leaving the Bunsen Burner on...

"Lexaeus! Can you believe that little brat? The nerve! After all the years I spent telling that runt what to do, and now look!"

Brought out of his silent wanderings, once more the quiet giant that was Number V in the Organization showed off his hidden intelligence by merely nodding his head once. "Hm," he sounded in a nice, low tone.

Straightening himself back up, Vexen sneered at the other Nobody present, taking his lack of vocabulary as stupidity, which none the less pleased him. Not only did it give him a moment of superiority over someone, but Lexaeus' muttered reply of agreement reassured the feminine man that he was in the right. Zexion was now outnumbered, and even more importantly, wrong!

Tapping his hairless chin, Number IV's brain suddenly clicked with an idea. An evil, scheming idea that not even the Cloaked Schemer himself would see coming! It was nothing less then... Magnificent!

"Genius! I truly am a genius!" Vexen cackled, floppy sleeves swinging in the air over his gloved hands. In a moment of bipolar-ness, the so called genius suddenly slumped over.

It was these times that he dearly wished he had lightning powers instead of ice. His evil scientist act would be all the more better with lightning flashing in the background. Damn that Number XII!

'Hm, speaking, er, thinking of that sadist...' Again, Vexen's emotional roller coasted rose to the top of a hill. "Brilliant!" Once more a small smirk appeared on his thin, pale lips.

All the while, poor Lexaeus had been watching. For a moment, he thought he could imagine fear rising and getting caught in his throat. He was now focused on desperately trying to swallow it back down.

"Lexaeus! Be a dear and fetch me that foolish nymph of ours," Vexen suddenly snapped. But instead of receiving an anticipated 'yes' or a silent leave of the large man, instead, only a choked cough filled the otherwise hushed lab.

The Chilly Academic raised a thin eyebrow. It was as close as he could get to feeling disgusted at the moment, his moment, being broken. Honestly! It was so frustrating having to deal with a castle full of inferiors!

"I apologize," Lexaeus quickly spoke up after getting over his sudden bout. It wasn't the large man's fault that he had been spooked, but in his mind he certainly didn't see it as so. "I'll bring her right away," he added with a small bow of his head, an act of asking for forgiveness.

Rising and thrusting his hand forward, and this time not breaking any beakers, the Silent Hero produced a tunnel of darkness in which he exited through.

Vexen rubbed his temple as he plotted. "Just where is that old perfume container of mine?" he wondered out loud. "Did I leave it in my room? My office? The bathroom?" After an encore of 'the angry goose dance,' the huffy scientist was left to quickly try and find it on his own, as there was no one else to order around. Blast it. Where were the others when he actually needed them?


Ok, so, hope you got at least one little chuckle out of it. Um, tell me if you want more, though, like I said earlier, I can't really get on much to write a lot. But I'll try my best. Really I will! Even if I have to cut back on rping! Gasp! xO

So until then, later gators?

Oh god, I think I just gave away my oldness. ;-;

One more thing! For you Zexion lovers that didn't get to see much of him this time, I promise that you'll see much more of him later. x3