All belongs to JK Rowling of course
Hope you enjoy, not very good really but I just felt like writing it anyway, you'll forgive me right? ;)
Musings of a Werewolf
I've never really been one for the colour pink, I couldn't honestly say that I've ever really liked it, it was just another colour in the spectrum, somewhat annoying when girls in my year at school decorated all their belongings in it, a little unnerving whenever I saw it on a boy in my year but that was it. Yet here I stand, or rather sit as I'm at a meeting for the Order in the kitchen of Grimmauld Place, and it looks like the most fantastic colour I've ever seen, bright bubblegum pink.
I know that I should be paying attention to Bill Weasley's report but its just so distracting, that little shock of colour in this grim place, I simply can't seem to focus on anything else than that girl sitting across from me with her pink hair. Silently I chastise myself for being such a romantic fool, for continuing to stare when I know that at any moment people will start to notice and think me a lecherous old man, which really is true.
Only she doesn't seem to mind, which is the oddest thing of all, she likes me too and I have absolutely no idea why, after all its hardly like I can actually offer her anything, I don't really have a job, I don't have very much money and to top it all off I'm a Dark creature, a werewolf. If it hadn't been for Sirius putting his foot in it, I don't know that I ever would have let her know how I feel.
As it was I had hardly known what to say when she cornered me in the study yesterday, demanding to know if it was true, idiotically I had been unbearably evasive, I should have known Tonks would never have allowed me to get away with it. I could still feel the warmth of her lips on mine and somehow I knew I'd never forget that feeling, even if somewhere along the line she realised that she really did deserve more.
She glances up now, catching my eye with a slightly amused glint in hers and I wonder if she knew I had been watching her all this time. She smiles and I can't help but smile back, even as I realise that I'm behaving like a lovesick fool and I should really be paying more heed to the fact that the wizarding world is at war. Her head drops again, she returns to writing fastidious notes about the meeting as I should be doing but my quill hasn't moved in my hand since the beginning of the meeting when she walked in.
Someone elbows me in the kidney and I know that it's Sirius who sits behind me, he leans in next to my ear,
"Stop ogling my cousin, Remus" he whispers pointedly, amusement warm in his voice, I snigger, unable to come up with the energy to protest and fix my eyeline firmly on Bill, though I'm still watching her out of the corner of my eye. Her hair falls into her eyes slightly and I have to try very hard to repress the sudden desire to reach out and tuck the loose strands behind her ear. I shift so that my I'm sitting on my free hand and count the minutes, the seconds till the meeting is over and I can steal her away for a few moments.
I silently will the time to go faster, watching each tick of the clock, by some inexplicable miracle this distracting and vivacious and adorably clumsy woman was mine and I really didn't wanting to be wasting any time while it was likely she could walk away at any moment. I had to make the most of the time I had and that really didn't involve just chastely watching her from across a table as various people made reports on the numerous dead-end leads about Voldemort and how exactly the Ministry continued to botch things up.
I don't think I've ever had to come to terms with how little patience I have until now, she looks up again, smiling and my heart stutters a little in a way that I haven't felt for years. She knows I'm still looking at her despite the small shift of my head, she knows its only to keep up pretences. After all theres no need for the whole of the Order to find out how completely head over heels I am for quite some time, although I'm pretty sure Molly suspects and Sirius knows of course. No-one else needs to know, I wanted to keep this to myself for a while, bask in the fact that life is no longer quite as miserable without having to also face the ordeal of probing questions and in some cases, cough, (Severus), cough, jibes and sneers.
Suddenly everyone seemed to be packing up, it's over! A small smile of private glee inching its way across my face as I get up from my seat instantly, my hand has started to go to sleep and I shake it out a bit to return some feeling to it. Tonks is smiling tentatively at me as she is accosted by Molly offering her some food, I raise my eyebrow and head out the door towards the study. She'll know where to find me, the thrill of anticipation thrums through my veins and I no longer even care that I'm being ridiculous for a man my age.
