Heal My Broken Soul
By: KingdomHeartsAwsome111
Chapter 1: The loss of a thousand memories
"Edward please." I had tears in my eyes now showing how weak I was in front of him made me want to hide in a deep dark hole and never return, I wasn't one that normally cried in front of people. "Bella, this is best… for both of us." Edward's velvety voice punctured my heart, this would be the last time I ever hear it again, how could this happen? I fell to my knees, landing hard on the ground I cut my leg on a rock, blood dripping into the muddy ground. "Bella please, don't make this harder for me.." "Harder fro YOU!!" My mascara was running now, great I was embarrassing myself. "Edward, you're my life!" I pleaded once more holding onto his arm tightly, so maybe he wouldn't be able to leave, bad guess. Edward tore from my grasp and walked off into the forest forever, leaving me alone in the cold wet rain.
I opened my eyes with a start…. Just a nightmare. Reliving that moment when the air I breathe was stolen from me was all that haunted me now, nothing else scared me more.
I looked into the darkness outside, the rain pounding hard against my window I thought I saw a flash of white pale sin run away into the woods, but I knew it was nothing more than a hallucination that kept taunting me, the hallucination that Edward was coming back. When I knew he was never coming back for once I felt alone, and there was no one to turn to, no one to hold me close in the night, no one at all. The next morning I woke up early, I tried going back to sleep to no avail, sleeping just wasn't an option, but I felt so tired. As if the life was being slowly sucked out of me. So I went downstairs to make Charlie breakfast, when I found that I had more time I cleaned the whole house. Lately I couldn't risk having extra time to myself, it provoked thoughts of HIM to haunt my mind.
School was the worst part, I went back to being my former loser self, none of my "friends" liked Edward and even when he left they still didn't talk to me, we had been so used to not spending time together we had distanced ourselves from each other all except for Mike Newton. Mike had been hitting on me and was always jealous of Edward, he took his absence as an opportunity. He constantly followed me around and tried to talk to me, but my heart just wasn't in the right place right now to deal with him… instead I just said: Hi Mike and I walked away. One day at school I just felt so lonely that I invited Mike to the movies at eight o' clock he was at my house, dressed in a nice t-shirt and some jeans he took me out on our date. It killed me to admit it but it did feel like a date, sitting so close to him felt… okay. At one part of the movie I actually went in closer and rested my head on his chest, it felt so odd…. He pulled me in even closer and wrapped his arms around me. OH NO. I quickly pulled away and stared blankly at the screen displaying a man walking through the dark forest and being attacked by a vampire. Oh crap, I wasn't even paying attention to what I was watching, we went to see 30 Days Of Night. I leaned my head back and prayed for the movie to end. "Bella? Would you like to get some dinner?" Mike asked clearly planning something "Sure." I didn't take the bait and just kept quiet the rest of the way to Darla's, a family owned country cooking restaurant. After we order Mike sat us down in the farthest seat from anyone, why we needed so much privacy I had no clue. "Bella. I am really sorry that Edward moved." I felt my eyes water and said in a shaky voice "Yeah. It's fine." Mike saw the tear and put an arm around me, and I let him. "But you do have me.." Mike lifted my head with his hands and looked into my eyes, wow I never noticed his eyes were BEAUTIFUL. They were so easy to get lost in… and before I knew it my lips met his. What was happening?! I tried to pull away but my body wouldn't let me, once my mind relaxed I closed my eyes and actually enjoyed the kiss. He slowly pulled away and said "Bella I love you and you can always come to me about this stuff." "I will." I smiled and then thought about the words he just said I LOVE YOU. I honestly thought I was starting to love him, no. I couldn't cheat on Edward! He would be furious when he comes back, wait he wasn't coming back. "Here y'all go now." The waitress sat our food on the table, mine a country fried steak and Mike's a chicken. The dinner was good, especially with having Mike there, he felt like a missing fragment of the puzzle piece that was lost from my life when Edward left. As we drove to my house I blurted out something "Mike… I love you too." Mike smiled at me, this was what he had wanted all along, and he got his wish. We were now going out, it wasn't official but to him just by saying those three cursed words it was.
The next day when I went to school I was greeted by Mike, he kissed me on my cheek and said "hey." All of the memories came flooding back to me of last night's occurrences, but how could I tell him that last night wasn't real. It was a spare the moment deal, I didn't genuinely mean it! "Uhh… hi." I said and Mike dragged me to our first class which we sat right next to each other in. The day went on like this, Mike holding my hand, leading me to our classes, lunch, it was like I was lost without him. I pulled my hand away saying "I know how to walk Mike." He blushed and stopped leading me everywhere we went, good a first step to distancing myself from him.
