Quantum Mechanics Rainbow: IV - Green Method - Seguchi Touma

Disclaimer: All of the Gravitation characters belong to Murakami Maki and Quantum Mechanics Rainbow CDs and concept belongs to Asakura Daisuke.

Description: He's always been this way. Who's the man behind the man?

Updates: I've not had much motivation to write, but here it is. All reviews are appreciated and criticism is taken into account. Oh, and in this chapter Seguchi-san is sixteen and talking about his mentor...my writing is so indirect that I need to point that out.

Chapter 1: The Forbidden Fruit (Kidan no Mi)

I learned at a very early age how to get what I want. The word 'no' is meaningless to me. It's pointless unless that's what I want to hear. I don't let people into my life...save my family and my father's...band. Sure, I've lived a sheltered life. I have a big house in the suburbs and I had a few close friends. However, I've drifted away from them. My one true love, music, won't ever leave.

It's not that I'm not personable. I am...at family get-togethers and parties. I'm the life of the party and I rarely falter publicly, but when I do...you'd never know.

As for music...the synth is my specialty and I take great pleasure in spending many afternoons writing scores. Testing them is even more enjoyable. I've played the piano since I was five and I've been doing recitals for years. Although, I still prefer the synth.

My father's synth player offered to teach me...So, he does. Twice a week he gives me private lessons. I can tell I'm improving and he agrees. It's strange...I don't know if it's him or his music, but...I don't feel as...disconnected from the world...during our lessons.

I wouldn't say we're friends, but I wouldn't dare say that we're not. I try to keep away from the synth when he's not around, but usually...if I'm alone and all of my school work is complete...I creep into the music room and play some of his scores. Our sound is different. His is raw and alive, but I'm...cold and technical. I may never miss a note, but what good does that do if my music lacks emotion...and passion? When he's around I try to imitate his style and passion. I don't think...I know he hasn't noticed. I even surprise myself with control.

Control...My mother told me to be a politician because I love control so much. She said it would be easy and that I would excel iit. I really can't stand her because she's right. She's always right, but I know I don't want that kind of life. I'd rather shuffle along in my father's footsteps. She knows that too. I can control anyone I'd like. Anyone, but her. What I want I get, but she's whistling the same tune and her tune drowns mine out. She's the reason I can't leave home at night.

Really...It should bother me more than it does, but I ease the inner pain with my music. Before my piano lessons my parents said I was a quiet child that liked to be alone and was afraid of everyone. It was pretty bad from what I heard, but after the lessons I morphed into a social butterfly.

Today, I still enjoy being alone...but I rarely come across someone that really frightens me. I'not afraid of anything really...almost. I'm afraid for my music. Did I play well enough? Did he like it or was he pretending to? These questions plaue my sleep. Then, there are those other thoughts. Thoughts that make it even harder to sleep. Thoughts that shouldn't be uttered. So, they're not.

He's proud of me. He'd better be...because I don't jump through hoops for just anyone. He's...special. He's not like the rest of them and I wouldn't want him to be.

I'm young, but I'm not so young. I know I'm attracted to him. I'never one to bullshit myself about things. Especially these things. Thoughts and words are not on the same page. They don't need to be.

If this is a dream, I would choose never to wake. I'd rather be blissfully unaware of his sly eyes, but I'm not and this is reality. Lust is a sin and the best one at that. Only the unintelligent are innocent. I pretend to be naive, but I would kick myself if I really was.

Does he know I look at him? If he does...does he do the same? Does it matter? Doubting yourself is destructive. It never gets you anywhere and you wind up alone...crying about trivial matters.

I guess...in the end, I would just want him to know that I wouldn't mind dying alone...as long as he were by my side. Ironically, my nonsense would would fall upon deaf ears. 

End

Author's Note: It's short, but that's what these are. The next chapter is called Personal Safety.

About Quantum Mechanic's Rainbow: My plan is to crank out 7 stories all titled Quantum Mechanics Rainbow I - VII. Each story will revolved around a different character. Quantum Mechanics Rainbow IV: Green Method is about Seguchi Touma. The next one is Quantum Mechanics Rainbow V: Yellow Vector is about Sakuma is about 7-10 chapters in each story and they're all titled after songs created by Asakura Daisuke for his Quantum Mechanics Rainbow CDs.

About Asakura Daisuke: Asakura-san created music for the Gravitation OVA and was part of songs like Blind Game Again, Smashing Blue, and Shining Collection. He did Shining Collection in Iceman with Ito Kenichirou and Kuroda-san. He did the rest with Kotani Kinya and MADS(Mad Soldiers). My idea of using Quantum Mechanics Rainbow as a basis for fanfiction started when I listened to some of the songs and pictured the Gravitation cast. Each song is the title for each short in the story. They are all in order of the original CDs. If you want to hear the Quantum Mechanics Rainbow songs go to and look up Asakura Daisuke. The song is called The Forbidden Fruit.

Special Thanks:

1. WS: Thanks for editing. I mean it!

2. Anyone who reads or reviews: I really appreciate your time! What's the point of writing fanfiction...if not for the fans?