LeFwee's Story
Ever wondered what it would be like if Lefwee survived the frenzy of sharks? This oneshot tells just that. From Lefwee's POV. Also tells about LeFwee's life.
By Fedora_Kid
Disclaimer: Fedora_Kid doesn't own Sucker Punch or Sly Cooper.
I thought I was going to win. I thought that sword fight was in me favor. But then, me pirate flower delivered that final blow. I was falling. I could see the side of me ship rising up until I hit the water. I quickly panicked and thrashed around wildly. A horrible mistake. I eventually saw them terrible dorsal fins. There were three of 'em, all heading for me.
At that moment, me life flashed before me eyes. When I was just a child, seven years old, both me parents, some of the most ferocious pirates in the town, were killed when their ship was sunk in a ferocious battle. I became an orphan. But by growing up in a rough world as a pint-sized child, I learned that if I wasn't able to be tough, I had to be smart instead. I still remember me first fight. I was ten. He was a large, muscular, 45-year old dog who tried to steal me money, but I refused to lose easily. He and I started swashbuckling. It looked as if I was gonna lose (what with me tiny dagger against that large cutlass), but I had a trick up me sleeve. After being able to stall long enough with me swift swashbuckling, I pretended to surrender and revealed that the location of me money was in the system of caves on the island near the waterfall. He immediately left. I took a shortcut and got there first. I then took me position next to the hole in the roof of the cave. When he was directly underneath, I dropped a bunch of cannonballs on his head. Once he was dead, I jumped down and stole his money.
When the townspeople heard of me brilliance, they were all impressed. Eventually, the leader of the town at that time, Black Spot Pete, having heard of a child who outsmarted an adult, actually hired me to plan the battle strategies. With me help, they were able to conquer more and more ships in very ingenious ways. And as I got older, I became smarter. Eventually, Pete started giving me a handsome part of any treasure that they got from a ship defeated by me strategies. In a matter of weeks, I was already swimming in gold, silver, and jewels. I eventually started partaking in battles, as me sword skills were also impressive. I gained the title of the Smartest Boy on the Seven Seas (it wasn't until I became an adult when me title was changed from Smartest Boy to Smartest Man on the Seven Seas), and became the town leader at the age of thirteen! I conquered more and more ships, got more and more richer, and I also became known as the greatest pirate alive today.
Me life was virtually perfect, until now, that is. I returned to the present. The sharks drew closer and closer. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. I'm going to die. That was the only thought running through me mind. No. I wasn't going to die like this. The Smartest Man on the Seven Seas was not going to die in this humiliating way. I had to fight back. I still had me sword. I waited for the one shark that would come close to me first. It was a 12-foot Tiger Shark. I jammed me sword into its eye. It started thrashing around also. Blood was pouring from that huge hole. I pulled me sword out. The two other sharks stopped for a brief moment, then turned away from me and headed towards the wounded one. They immediately started eating it.
For a moment, I thought I had won, but then I felt a stabbing pain in the side of me stomach. I was able to turn around to see a fourth shark, a massive, 17-foot long Great White, sinking its teeth into me. I could see blood in the water. My blood. I tried to puncture this shark's eye like I did the other, but I couldn't reach it. I then got a better idea. I put me blade into the beast's mouth and shoved upward, hitting the roof of the shark's mouth. It shook its head wildly for a few seconds, then opened its mouth and let go of me. I quickly started swimming away from the monsters. I noticed that the first wounded shark was dead, and the two turned to the other wounded one. Blood was pouring from its mouth, so they began to eat it as well. I turned around to look at the town. It seemed far away, but I thought I could swim it. I started towards the nearest dock. About halfway thar, I realized that me hat was gone. I looked and could just barely see it floating in the water among the fins.
I looked up at the deck of me ship. The landlubbers were staring down at the water, at me hat. They all had the look of triumph on their faces. They thought I was dead! They were happy at the thought of me dead. How dare they! I thought. They thought they had won, they thought they had beaten me. But they were wrong. Dead wrong. I turned back and continued swimming. Soon, the dock was only about three and a half yards away from me. At this point (when I knew I was far away enough so that the lubbers couldn't hear me, but the people on the shore could), I started yelling, "Help! Pull me up! Get me out of the water now!" Immediately, a few of me men who had heard me came rushing to the end of the dock. When I was close enough, they grabbed me and pulled me up onto the dock. I was tired, I was wounded, but I was alive.
After I was rescued, I was taken to the town's doctor. He patched up me wound and was able to conclude that I would be fine in a day or two. When I went back to the dock where I was pulled from the water, the ship that the lubbers stole, the Midgard Serpent, was gone. And I was happy to find out that me ship, the Death's Head, was spared and brought back to port to be repaired. But to me horror, I discovered that all of me surviving men had surrendered! At first, I was angry, and I had half a mind to have them all hanged, but then I learned that they also thought I was dead, and that's why they surrendered. I guess I couldn't blame them, I mean, many pirate crews would surrender if their captain was defeated, so I spared them. I also learned from one of me spies that Black Spot Pete was the one who told the lubbers the location of the treasure map, and that's why they messed with me in the first place. So I immediately had him hung, and his body fed to the sharks.
And even though those blasted, no-good, thieves had stolen our fastest ship, the citizens of Blood Bath Bay soon continued on with life, and forgot all about it. But I haven't.
