"This isn't how it was supposed to be, Tamaki." A heavy sigh, and the sound of lightweight material fluttering to the ground, accompanied by the beginnings of whimperings from a certain blue-eyed fool king.

"But…Kyoya…I thought this was what you wanted? Did I forget something? Did I mess something up?" The sounds of footsteps and a pen scratching swiftly across the page.

"Tamaki, if I this was what I wanted, trust me, you would be among the first to know. Considering how…unorthodox this whole thing is. Our relationship, this arrangement, all of it. What it is that you've done…it's not what I was expecting. And I don't mean that in a good way."

Tears begin to fall. "But, Kyoya, I thought…"

"Wrong. Did you at least keep the receipt?"

"No…can you forgive me, Mommy? If you don't, I don't think I can live with myself, knowing that I have failed you so completely and made such a fool of myself!"

"You are known for being a bit of a foolish king…but I suppose I can forgive…for a price…"

"Anything! I will do anything for Mommy, just name it!"

"I want pictures of this for an upcoming magazine for the club. I'm sure it would do more than please your demented fangirls…"

"NOOOO ANYTHING BUT THAT! I only wear this sort of thing in case of emergencies, such as threat of Haruhi being taken to Lobelia or, well, for you, because I thought you'd like it, but I see now that all you want is to blackmail me, why are you so mean to Daddy, why…"he trailed off into a panicked moan. For, you see, Tamaki Suoh was standing in the middle of the abandoned music room in naught but a dress that was, for all intents and purposes, two sizes too small for him. Covered in frills, lace, and glitter, he sank to his knees to beg (or just to make it easier for him to go sulk in a corner later, who honestly even knows?).

"Well…if not that, how else can you make up the club's money that you spent on this frivolous error of yours? I suppose, if you have no better ideas, you could pay me back…with your body!"

Tamaki stopped groveling at Kyoya's feet too look up at him, dumbfounded. Kyoya continued to glare down at him, for a seemingly interminable time, before the corners of his lips quirked up into a rarely-seen smile, and then into a full-out smile, which soon dissolved into laughter. Tamaki stood, frowning deeply upon realizing he'd become the butt of Kyoya's joke.

"Those nasty twins have had such an awful influence on everyone! First, corrupting my darling daughter Haruhi, and now they've taught you to behave badly, Mommy! I just don't know what to do with them…hey!" Kyoya had grabbed Tamaki by the shoulder, pulling him in close.

"I think the twins have little to do with this. But seriously, I expect you to work twice as hard to make up the deficit you've made with this pricey purchase of yours. Although, I suppose we can put it to some sort of use in private…" he mused, pushing his glasses up his nose.

"Of course. I shall do whatever it takes to make Mommy happy! But wait a second, you said you didn't like the dress, or so I thought."

"Another mistake of yours, not letting me finish. I said it wasn't what I wanted, but not because of that, not really. I suppose I didn't know that I wanted something quite like this, but now that I see it… however, I would rather have you in this dress in a more…private setting."

Tamaki blushed a nearly fluorescent red. "O-oh. I suppose you're right. That was my mistake. Would you like for me to…fix it?"

Kyoya grabbed his ever-present notebook and headed for the door. "Meet me at my estate once you've had time to put on your uniform. But do bring the dress."