She was beautiful. Dazzling so. And she knew it. Everyone knew it. That's why they called her a whore. A slut. A bitch. A playgirl. She wasn't one. They didn't know that. But it's not like she denied the claim anyway. It didn't matter what others believed because her friends believed her. So the haters could go fuck themselves senseless for all she cared.

They didn't know her. So they didn't really hate her. They just hated what they thought of her.

She said it a million times. She said it more than a million times. And it hurt a million times more. They didn't know her. But they still believed they did and they hated who they believed was she. And that hurt.

It only made it harder for her to hold her head up high when passersby whisper so shamelessly in her vicinity. It made it harder for her to walk without a slouch when the hearsays revolving around her do not ebb, only to intensify day after day. It made it harder to smile at her friends as if nothing was wrong. She couldn't not smile. That wouldn't be her. To be a strong beautiful kuniochi was practically her trademark. Her insignia. She was the gorgeous bitch who couldn't care less about what others think. Everyone crowded around her for her overflowing confidence, hoping that just by being close to her they too will be self-assured. For that, she's thankful that in some indirect way she can help others with their self-image.

So what if you can make them more confident? In the end, they don't actually like you. They're using you. Everyone uses people and you're not exempted.

Her smile falters just for a second.


One day I can be the best! I know I have a harder tougher mountain to climb! Everyone else had the un-youthful chance of using an escalator up the mountain! But no! I shall youthfully climb the stony, pebbly trail up the mountain and reach having learnt more than those who un-youthfully took an elevator! Yes! Indeed! The wonders of having made a more youthful journey! After all, everyone says it's the journey filled with youth that counts! Not the escalator ride to victory! That is un-youthful!

I cannot mould chakra! But that is okay! For my youth can make up for the lack of chakra control! I am certain of my youth! Have I not heard the youthful story of the youthful tortoise and un-youthful! Yes! My eternal rival is like the hare that has been naturally gifted! And I who am like the youthful tortoise without speed-gifts shall slowly reach the end! But I shall reach the end! Because I shall youthfully work hard! I shall be like the youthful tortoise! Never give up! Because that is un-youthful!

One day I can be greater than my eternal rival! I shall ousts the un-youthfully bunny that is Neji Hyuuga! HAHA! To train for my youthful battle! I shall run 500 rounds around Konoha! And if I can't –

So what if you can work hard? So what if you work hard every single second. Your "eternal rival" works hard every single second too. The only reason the hare in that ridiculous story lost was because he took a nap. Do you see your eternal rival taking a nap any time soon? Face it. You'll never be the best. Never.

For the first time, he actually trips.


You are weak. Your knees can't even support you. You faint almost every day. If someone were to do a study of the probability of you fainting in a day, the outcome would be 0.0002322 away from 100%.

But it's okay. Because you know that weakness is the key to strength. If you were never weak you would never be able to truly understand the meaning of strength. Weakness and strength is a relative thing. Without weakness, there is no strength. So you are grateful for your weakness. In fact, you're quite proud. You've managed to use your weakness and make it a stronger point.

It shouldn't even be called weakness anymore. It's actually strength. And if that is so, then you're actually really strong. You could probably do everything you wanted. You just didn't know you were this strong. Now that you do, you can finally achieve that new technique Kurenai sensei was trying to teach you. You can be better than your dear sister Hanabi. You can be the clan leader. You know you can. You have all the qualities of a good leader: consideration, rationality, and now, the strength you know you have.

You let out a peal of laughter. Because it's been a long time since you were able to feel good about yourself. And this time, it's because you've been foolishly blinding yourself to the fact you were weak. You're not weak. You're strong. So you laugh.

Please, don't even try to lie to yourself. You actually think you're strong? Hah! Just because you give weakness a different name doesn't mean it still isn't weakness. The fact you can lie to yourself just shows how definitely weak you are. You're pathetic.

You choke on your laughter. You don't feel like laughing anymore.


Everyone knows he's stupid. Fine. Maybe not stupid. But, he's a little less than smart. Big deal. Okay, he's a lot less than smart. Still, it's no biggie. Many people in the world aren't intellectually capable and can still make a living. Take that rich guy who is a billionaire for example! He didn't even go to school! Hah! And Kiba did! He went AND graduated school. So his chances of being a billionaire are higher!

Granted, he doesn't want to be a billionaire. Not like anyone expects him to anyway. Everyone just thinks that he'll be a burden to his family. At least the family has the girl, his sister that is, that's what everyone silently says. He doesn't need the words to be said out loud for him to hear it. Contrary to belief, he's not that stupid.

His sister often tells him that he doesn't need to be like her. They are two different people. The others need to see that. It's sad they can't. That's why he sees the neighbours constantly comparing his stupidity to his sister's intelligence.

What went wrong?

Maybe he was adopted.

The mother must've had an affair!

Who would have an affair with that woman! She's mad!

Most of the time, he would come out of his hiding place and attack the bastards that dare insult his family. But afterwards he would feel bad because he'd just proven the bastards right. He was so different from his sister.

Meh. It's not like he is stupid. He didn't fail his exams half the time. He skipped it. There's a huge different between having absent written in his exam paper than having a zero. There's no solid proof that says he's clinically stupid. He's actually really smart. He's a skilled ninja and he can synchronise perfectly with Akamaru. That's what's important to him. And that's enough for him. Like what Hana says, it's the things you care about that really matter.

Who are you kidding? You skipped those exams because you know you'd fail. If you went to those exams you'd get less than zero. Your teachers would send to a mental ward because of your dangerous stupidity. Don't pretend that it's any different.

In the back of his mind, he wonders whether all the years skipping class was really worth it.


You yawn. You sigh. You stare. You sigh again. Under breath, you curse the high heavens why couldn't you just sleep the day away. It's not like there's much to do anyway. There's no mission. There's no class. There's no training. But, no! You just had to be dragged out of your comfortable bed to go strategise with the Hokage about an upcoming mission she's planning.

You groan at the very thought. That's the whole reason you're sitting in the uncomfortable chair in the Hokage's office. You've already finished planning most of the things. Next all you have to do is decide on the ninjas to carry out the mission. The Hokage is listing out suitable candidates that you mostly brush aside, knowing they do not fit the requirements of the mission. You notice the Hokage getting a bit frustrated that no one seems capable.

"I'll go," you say before your mind can stop you. Inside, you would kick yourself mentally if only it wasn't took much work. Truth is, the mission needed someone above average intelligence. While Neji or Sasuke might have been proper candidates, they were both busy with other missions. Sakura, being quite an intelligent ninja has been known to be a tad bit emotional when it comes to being so close with the informant, rationalising only after a decision is made. So the best option, out of the hundreds you've come up with, is you. After all, it's a mission you planned.

"No," came the Hokage's immediate reply. " I don't want you getting hurt!" You shrug knowing that the Hokage simply didn't want to sacrifice her second best strategist. The first being the older Nara, of course. You're okay with it. After all, going on the mission would have been so… troublesome.

Or maybe you're incapable. Ever thought of that, genius? This is what, the eleventh time Tsunade's rejected you for a mission. You're a genius. But that alone doesn't make you a good ninja. You're so lazy. You never go for training. What makes you think you won't die halfway from running? Intelligence will only get you so far. You may be able to see two hundred over ways to destroy the enemy and pick the best, but you wouldn't be able to execute it. You might as well have no limbs. You already act like you don't.

You raise your eyes and closely examine the Hokage. Your eyes widen as you see the tell tale signs of a lie with the small quiver of her lips.


I WILL BE THE HOKAGE! I WILL BE LIKE THE FOURTH HOKAGE! I WILL PROTECT MY VILLAGE! I WILL ALLOW ALL RAMEN STALLS TO BE FREE OF TAXES! FOR I AM THE ORANGE FLASH OF KONOHA!

I grin happily and excitedly at the words I just splattered across my wall. It's my motivation because one day, I will be the Hokage and live up to Minato Namikaze's name! I shall make the village proud of me and of my achievements! I will protect Konoha like Minato Namikaze did!

Even though the village doesn't like me. But I'm sure one day they'll acknowledge me! As long as I work hard, there's nothing that can stop me! I will work hard! I will make Sasuke bow down to my superior strength! HAHAHAHAHA!

You crazy idiot. You'll never be a ninja. You fail at everything. The only reason you managed to graduate is because your teacher sympatha-

I graduated because Iruka sensei saw that I am a real ninja! He did not need to sympathise with me! I need no sympathy!

Fine! So you got lucky! But luck won't get you anywhere! You'll never be promoted to chunnin! You'll always be a lowly genin! Even when Konohamaru becomes a jonin, you'll still be a genin, forever! In fact, they'll call you the Forever Genin, FG for short!

So what? Just because I'm a genin doesn't mean I'm not a good ninja. A true ninja is not defined by ranks. I can still become the Hokage! It might take forever! But after forever, I WILL BE THE HOKAGE! AND NOTHING YOU SAY CAN STOP ME!

*Silence*


You're right. I will never be able to execute the missions I plan if I do not train. I won't be able to protect the people I care about. Choji and Ino would suffer if I do not start taking my training seriously. And that… would be troublesome. So I shall train harder. I will become a true ninja.

I know I've avoided the exams. I could have very well failed. But that's in the past and I can't change it. What I can change is how I live my life from now on. I will work on my skills, jutsus and other techniques so that I can be a true ninja.

A different name makes all the different. It's a new identity. I'm right when I said that weakness is strength. I know my weak points and by knowing them, I know how I can improve and overcome them. I will be a stronger and better kuniochi.

Your un-youthful words have no effect on me! If the hare does not take a nap, then it has made a youthful choice! And I as the youthful tortoise will have to make youthful choices as well! We will both be filled with youth in the end! Two can be youthful! The more youth, the more youthfully better the world will be! I shall run another 500 laps around Konoha for tripping! How un-youthful of me! If I cannot, I shall swim to the Water Country and back for 100 times!

Well isn't that the world, dear voice I hear? Everyone uses everyone. I just happen to be able to fully use my gifts to share it all with everyone! I make my friends feel cared for and loved! They feel secure with me! I'm delighted they feel that way! Without me, Choji would eat so unhealthily until he explodes with fats. Without me, Shikamaru will be in a perpetual slumber that would even put Sleeping Beauty to shame! So thank, stupid voice! I am awfully glad that you have told me I'm being used! Because I have a purpose! And to have a purpose is the way of the ninja! Unlike you! You stupid voice!


Statistics show that every single person in the world falls into depression at least once in their life. It's perfectly normal. It'd actually be abnormal if you've never been depressed, you'd be happy all the time. (That'd be so creepy!) While it's okay to feel sad and emo once in a while, we have to find the strength to climb out of it and stand tall.


oKAy... i'm not sure if you get it... but i hope you get it... myahhhhhhh *hides in shoe*