Disclaimer: I own nothing. The characters all belong to Amy Sherman Palladino. No copyright infringement is intended and no profit will be made from this story.
It had past more or less four months from when Emily had left Richard. In her mind they had seemed four years, forty years, an eternity. She had tried to create a little contact with him, but every time she had met him in that big and empty house she had had the impression that he had been uncomfortable there, that he would had preferred to be out of there, out of them, out of her life.
So one day she had simply realized that she couldn't live in that way for ever. It was time she went ahead with her life, without him. It was when she had decided to see other people, to meet with other men.
She had been at the club that day, still wearing her tennis outfit, when she had noticed Simon McLane in a corner of the room. He was tall and handsome, his eyes fixed on her almost openly. He joined her some minutes later and they exchanged some words. They had spoken about some banal things, like weather, golf and parties. He had seemed very nice to her, his eyes looking straight in her. After some more chatting she had understood that he was really interested on her, so she had accepted without hesitation when he had asked her out for dinner.
Thinking about the past afternoon she realized that she had accepted his invitation with her words, maybe with her smile, but her mind had not been there. Her heart had not been there. They both had been at Richard. All her thoughts had been at Richard in the past four months. He had hurt her like never before. He had stopped considering her his partner, he had barely informed her about his new job and his new life. She had felt belittled and ignored, nevertheless it was impossible for her not thinking about him constantly.
Now she was in the closet looking for a good dress for the dinner. She was not sure if the best one would be the long red one or the simple brown one. Both of them remembered her of some nights spent with her husband and surely she didn't want thinking about him being with Simon. Finally she opted for the new black one. It was very simple, small, not too long, simply the perfect dress for her first date.
"Oh my God! I'm dating a man." She whispered looking at her image reflected on the long mirror in the closet.
The last time she had dated a man had been more or less forty-two years ago and then she had married that man. Now it was all different. There was no enthusiasm, no excitement, only a sense of frustration and melancholy.
It was seven o'clock when the doorbell rang. She walked from the living room to the foyer and opened the door by herself. She had fired the maid in the morning, after having found her smoking a cigarette in Richard' study.
Smiling shyly she looked up at Simon. She couldn't help to notice how elegant he was in his black cashmere coat, a white silky scarf around his neck. He smiled down at her and took her right hand in his, bending down a bit to kiss it gently.
She was not comfortable with this, nevertheless she decided to smile at him. It was not his fault. He was acting politely and gently, she was the one out of place there. They chatted briefly in the foyer and then they went out of the house, her arm linked around his. He opened his black Mercedes for her and helped her sitting on the front passenger seat. Fastening the seatbelt she felt her hands shaking lightly. She was strangely excited and wasn't able to understand if it was because of Simon's closeness, or because of Richard's distance.
After more or less twenty minutes they sat down on one of the best Alfredo Italian Restaurant's table, just next to the fireplace. Looking through the window she could see the snow falling down on the garden. Simon was very polite, the meal was good, she had always loved Italian food, and the wine was excellent. She tried deeply to enjoy their time together and in way she succeeded in that.
They left the restaurant two hours later. He drove her directly home, thanking her for the beautiful evening more than once. When they finally reached the Gilmore's driveway he stopped the car and helped her out of it, squeezing her hand gently in the process. She smiled shyly, her head in a light spin due to the many glasses of wine she had had during the dinner. She inhaled deeply in the cold air of the night and walked slowly towards the main door. He followed her silently, staring mischievously at her behind.
He waited for her to turn around and then looked intently at her eyes before moving his gaze down to her mouth. It took her only a moment to understand he was about to kiss her lips. She closed her eyes feeling him bending down slowly, shortening the distance between them. He cupped her cheeks in his hands and was only a couple of inches far from her when she pulled away forcefully. It was too much for her. She thanked him for the nice evening and disappeared behind her house's door before he could say a word.
She leaned against the wooden door for a while before taking off her coat. By the time she reached the balustrade her cheeks were wet, two thin threads of tears rolled down silently. She felt weak and tired. Most of all she felt guilty for the date, for Simon, for not having tried enough to tell Richard her real feelings.
She climbed the stairs slowly and the entered her bedroom. She walked directly towards the bathroom and refreshed her face, trying to wash away the emotions that filled her heart. She cleaned her eyes with some de-make up and then dried her face with a soft white towel. Breathing slowly she walked back to the bedroom and sat down on her vanity's chair, putting up some light make up. Staring at her image on the little mirror she swallowed hard. There was only a thing she could do at the moment to feel better, to feel complete again. She brushed her hair and looked one more time at her image before going downstairs. She took the coat from the closet and put it on for the second time that night. She took in a couple of deep breaths in order to calm her down and went out of the house from the living room's French door. She walked through the patio, not really paying attention to the snow that was falling heavily now.
She went straight towards the pool house, her heart beating faster in her chest. She was about to knock on the French door when she saw Richard's back from the window. He was so tall, so strong, and so handsome. By the way he moved she could understand he was not alone. A blonde hair woman was sitting on the coach. Emily didn't know why that woman was there, but she had bad feelings about that. Suddenly the woman stood up and made some steps towards Richard. He smiled down at her and then hugged her.
"Oh my God!" Emily breathed staring at the scene.
She couldn't believe at her eyes! It was not possible! It was too hard to accept. The blonde hair woman was his young secretary. She could feel her heart stop for a second, her eyes full of tears while her hands trembled uncontrollably. She swallowed a sob when she saw them even more close. The woman kissed his right cheek, while her hands were busy unbuttoning his shirt. His hands were on her back.
Emily couldn't stare at the scene in front of her anymore. She walked weakly towards her house, her heart aching for what she had just seen. She sat on an iron chair in the patio. She didn't feel the cold around her slender body, neither the snow that was wetting her coat. The only thing she could feel was the coldness in her heart. She cried silently. The tears rolled down her face, wetting her cheeks, her neck, her hands. The night was black around, everything was black around her. After a long time she went back into house and picked up the phone, not really realizing it. A minute later she found herself dialling Lorelai's number.
Glancing at the clock on the little table next to the couch she saw it was half past ten.
"Hello? It's Lorelai." Lorelai said still eating some food.
"Lorelai it's your mother" Emily responded in a low voice, trying to pull away her tears.
"Mom, why do you call me at this our? Did something happen?" Lorelai said surprised.
"Lorelai I need to talk to someone, I'm sorry I disturb you…. But you're the only one that can help me now." It was very hard for Emily asking for help to her daughter, but she felt as if Lorelai was the only one that could help her at the moment.
"Mom, please tell me something more, you're frightening me." Lorelai said hesitantly.
"I went to the pool house tonight…. I wanted to talk to your father. I wanted him knowing my real feelings, my need of him, my love for him. I wanted to ask him to come home…. When I saw him with another woman." Emily said painfully.
"Oh my God! Mom are you sure that she wasn't only a friend, or a colleague ….". Lorelai said trying to calm her mother down
"Lorelai, she… she was…she was his young secretary". Emily responded still trying to believe to what she had just seen.
"Mom…" Lorelai started to say but Emily cut her off immediately.
"She was kissing you father's cheek, unbuttoning his shirt."…
…" Lorelai are you still there?" Emily asked after a long silence.
"Mom I don't know what to say, I'm speechless. What about you? How do you feel? Did you talk to him?" Lorelai said concerned.
"No." Emily responded.
There was another long silence between the two of them.
"Mom I think you shouldn't been alone tonight. If you want I can come over and spend the night with you…. I could be there in half an hour". Emily listened speechless at her daughter's offer. She couldn't believe that Lorelai really wanted to comfort her, that she really wanted to spend time with her.
"Lorelai, I thank you but it's not necessary." She said a moment later
"Mom I do insist… It will be a pleasure for me helping you through all of this." Lorelai said surprising herself.
"Thanks for the offer Lorelai. I do like spending time with you, but I don't want you drive in the middle of a snowfall. I'll come to Stars Hollow. I will be there in half an hour. Thank you Lorelai." Emily said and then hung up.
It was snowing heavily outside and Emily couldn't see clearly out of the car window. She was driving around Stars Hollow from more or less ten minutes and she was getting tired. All the streets seemed so similar in that little town that she had a hard time to recognize the right way to go to Lorelai's house. Fortunately after a while she saw Luke's diner so she understood she was near to her daughter's house. She drove for five more minutes until stopping the car in the little Lorelai's driveway.
She took a little bag from the passenger seat and then went out of the car, closing it with the remote key control. She walked quickly towards the little wooden porch. Her hand was already on the doorbell when she saw the door opening and her daughter smiling at her, wearing one of her silly multicolour pajamas.
Lorelai greeted her and took the bag from her hands before asking her to wait in the living room. Emily simply nodded and sat down on the little couch, looking around weakly. She smiled noticing for the first time a little photo of her and Rory just over the fireplace's mantle.
Lorelai joined her some minutes later, handling her a cup of hot tea. She seemed really caring for her mother and the tenderness she used towards her made Emily feeling better. She had never seen her daughter acting like this towards her. There was no pity in her eyes, she could see an honest concern in them.
They spent some time talking about what had happened in the pool house. Emily told her about her feelings ant the separation, and then without really noticing it they were sat one next to the other on the couch. Emily could smell her daughter's scent. That unique, indescribable scent of her baby. She was lost in the thought of how good it was being so close that she didn't hear her cell phone ringing.
"Mom?" Lorelai called carefully leaning her hand on her mother's upper arm.
"Yes, dear." Emily responded looking down at her daughter's hand.
"You cell phone is ringing." Lorelai said looking at her mother.
"Yes, sure." Emily responded standing up and walked towards the little table in the foyer. She grabbed her purse and opened the zipper quickly, looking for her ringing cell phone. Taking it in her hand she glanced down at the display and gasped at the name that was flashing. "Richard". She swallowed hard and let it ring. She wasn't sure why he was calling her, near midnight.
"What do you want from me?" She whispered, her lips moving barely perceptibly.
Probably he needed something from the house, in his study, she responded in her mind. She was walking back to the living room when the cell phone rang again. Richard again, she saw looking at the display. She had no intention to answer so she switched it off.
"Who was?" Lorelai asked seeing her mother walking towards her.
"Your father." Emily simply said, sitting on the couch.
"Did he say something about the pool house?" Lorelai asked concerned.
The expression on her mother's face was nothing of reassuring.
"I switched off the cell phone. I couldn't talk to him. Not now. Not after what I saw in our pool house." Emily responded looking down at her hands, where the cell phone still was.
"I'm sorry for you Mom. Really." Lorelai said standing up to sit close to her mother on the couch. She opened her arms and hugged her mother lightly. Emily was stunned by her daughter's move. She wasn't used to such a physical closeness with her and it felt a bit weird being in her arms. She had never been hugged in such a tender way by her daughter. The last time something similar happened Lorelai had been a little girl.
"I think I'll go to bed now." Emily said pulling away lightly.
"Good night Mom." Lorelai said smiling.
"Good night Lorelai." Emily responded weakly.
Lorelai stared at her mother disappearing in Rory's bedroom and then leaned down on the couch again, her head firmly against the big coloured pillow. She was about to switch on the TV when her phone rang. She stood up quickly and picked up the white wireless phone.
"Hello, it's Lorelai." She said immediately.
"Lorelai it's you father. Do you know where you mother is?" Richard asked unsure.
Maybe Emily had gone out for the night and he simply ignored it, but he couldn't help to feel concerned for her. She hadn't informed him about her night out and he was worried something had happened.
"So now you care." Lorelai responded angrily.
"Lorelai, what are talking about? She's my wife, it's obvious that I care." Richard responded astonished by her daughter's roughness.
"So now she's your wife. It seems as when you were in the pool house kissing your secretary you weren't caring too much about your wife!" Lorelai said hastily.
"What are you talking about? I didn't…. How do you know about the pool house?" He asked surprised.
"Mom told me. She saw you and your lover tonight." Lorelai responded.
"Oh my God. And where is she now?" He asked growing worried.
"It's not your business." Lorelai said coldly.
"Lorelai please I need to let your mother know nothing happened." Richard pleaded.
"Nothing happened? She cried her eyes out. She swallowed her pride and told me. She drove in the middle of a snowfall to come here and let me see her crying. That's nothing for you? She's sleeping in my daughter's bed because of you. She's destroyed because she thinks you lied to her. Because she thinks you met that woman behind her back and than you ran to her at the first occasion. She cried in front of me. I never saw her crying before. Never. It's not nothing!" Lorelai almost yelled at her father and then hung up.
Emily listened to her daughter and felt the tears coming back in her eyes. She rolled on her back in Rory's small bed and couldn't help to see the many Yale's posters that covered the walls. Yale. She met him at Yale for the first time. She looked at him and he gave her a tender glance. He asked her out some days later and brought her to the Yale Art Gallery for their first date. He kissed her that day. He proposed to her at Yale. She fell for him at Yale. She closed her eyes, a new wave of tears down her cheeks, her light sobs shook her small frame. She couldn't live without him, she was lost without his deep blue eyes. The same eyes that only some hours before looked with desire at another woman. Or not? She hadn't really paid attention, she had been focused on his hands on her back. She breathed deeply and then she fell asleep.
Emily rubbed her eyes, the faint light coming from the half opened curtains disturbing her. She rolled on her left side and yawned stretching her legs and arms. She moved under the sheets and pulled herself up, her back carefully against her grandaughter's pillow. A noise came from the kitchen. She stood up heavily and walked towards the door, opening it a moment later.
"Good morning Mom. How did you sleep?". Lorelai said looking for something in the fridge.
"Good morning Lorelai. I'm fine thanks. What are you doing?" She responded from the doorstep.
"I wanted to prepare the breakfast, but I'm sorry there is nothing eatable in my kitchen." Lorelai responded afraid.
She would have wanted to offer a normal breakfast to her mother, to avoid her judgement. She was sure her mother would have complained about her inability to run a house.
"It's not a problem. You can have your breakfast at Luke's as always and I'll go home". Emily said walking towards the bathroom.
That wasn't the answer Lorelai had expected from her mother. To be honest nothing that had happened the night before was something she could have expected from her mother. The woman who came in her house had been totally different by the Emily Gilmore she knew. That woman had talked to her without arguing, had listened to her, had smiled to her, had looked at her gratefully. That woman had been everything but cold and demanding. Maybe her mother was not the evil person she thought. Maybe they could really find a way to get along. She felt the inexplicable urge to be close to her, to know better that woman.
"Mom, eh… Why don't you come with me to Luke's? We can have breakfast together and after that we can do some shopping around Stars Hollow. I know that is not Hartford, but we can find something nice also here." Lorelai said hesitantly.
Emily turned around and looked speechless at her daughter. It was the real first time her daughter asked her to spend time together, out of obligations, in her little town.
"I think it's a good idea". She responded shyly.
Half an hour later they were ready to go out. Emily stood in the foyer while Lorelai looked at her insistently.
"Lorelai there is something wrong with my dress? My hair is not ok?" Emily asked puzzled.
"Oh, nothing is wrong with you Mom. It's only that we need to get you a new dress." Lorelai responded seriously.
"I don't understand why I need new dresses. My dress is new and …" Emily tried to respond but Lorelai cut her off.
"Mom you dress is just fine. A just Hartford fine dress, but we are in Stars Hollow now. You simply need something more comfortable." Lorelai responded looking softly at her mother.
Emily simply nodded and then they went out. There was no need to argue for such a stupid thing, she added in her mind while they walked towards Luke's. That thought surprised her making her shaking her head lightly.
The walk was pleasant, they talked about some banal matters avoiding bringing up Richard or the past night's events.
By the time they reached the diner they had met a lot of extravagant people, Emily couldn't help to notice.
"Good morning Luke." Emily said looking at the man with the baseball cap.
"Good morning Mrs. Gilmore." He responded trying to hide the surprise for her unexpected visit.
"Hello Luke." Lorelai said walking towards him and pressing a light kiss on his lips.
"Hello Lorelai." He responded aloud.
"Why on hell your mother is here? So early in the morning?" He whispered in Lorelai's ear.
"I'll tell you later." She whispered back and then sat on her usual table with her mother.
They had breakfast chatting about the Inn and Stars Hollow, enjoying the weird sensation of being close.
"I hope you like my breakfast". Luke said taking the dishes from the table.
"I like it, thank you Luke." Emily responded noting the light embarrassment in the man.
"Mom I think we can go now." Lorelai said and then kissed her fiancé quickly on the mouth.
"Lorelai I don't want you feel as you have to spend time with me…" Emily said stopping on the porch.
"Mom, I want to spend time with you today. I won't go to the Dragonfly this morning. We can go there together for lunch. You know, I must to check in on Michel, I need to be sure he hadn't sent away all our guests." Lorelai responded with a light laugh.
"Oh well, in this case I think I'll like to find a dress that fits better with Stars Hollow." Emily responded laughing too.
"Come on!" Lorelai said and then took her mother's arm and walked her through the town.
They had some shopping and then they went to the Inn. Lorelai did a bit of work while Emily enjoyed Sookie's cooking. They spent part of the afternoon at the Inn and then they went back to Lorelai's house.
Lorelai parked the Jeep on the driveway and both went out of the car with some shopping bags. They were about to reach the porch when Emily saw Richard sat on the stairs, staring at her. She felt her heart skipping a beat. Why was he there? What did he need from her? She tried to act normally, hiding her nervousness and walked straight towards him. Before she could say something Lorelai took her father's arm and forced him to follow her next to his car.
Lorelai said something Emily didn't understand, her back to the house, while Richard looked at his daughter silently, almost afraid.
Emily had never seen her daughter acting like that with her father. She seemed demanding, cold. The moment she was about to walk towards them Richard went into the car and drove away.
"Lorelai, why did your father come here? And why did he go away without talking to me?" Emily said staring at her daughter on the porch.
"Mom it's not so important. You need to be calm. Please don't think about him for now." Lorelai said opening the door.
Emily looked at her daughter for a moment, her blue eyes the same of her father's. She couldn't let go the topic like this, not without knowing why Richard had come to Stars Hollow.
"Lorelai I need to know if he needed me to sign the divorce, if he wants to move in with that girl." Emily said not moving from the foyer.
Lorelai widened her eyes at mother's words.
"No Mom he doesn't want a divorce, and most of all he doesn't want to move in with that girl. He was simply worried about you. He didn't find you at home last night so he came here today to apologize."
"Did he really want to apologize? For what? For his date with his secretary? I don't know Lorelai. I don't know what to do…. I love him, but does he still love me? Or simply he's making the right thing for the Gilmore reputation?" Emily said looking helplessly at her daughter.
She was confused, too confused to think rationally. Looking down at her hands she remembered the shopping bags, so she walked towards Rory's bedroom and changed in her new dresses slowly, trying to keep her mind away from her husband's visit.
"What do you think about my Stars Hollow's look?" She asked some time later to Lorelai.
"You're simply perfect Mom. Honestly you look beautiful, maybe you should dress like this more often". Lorelai responded smiling sincerely at her mother.
She really thought her mother was a beautiful woman and seeing her without her usual expensive dresses made her finding her even more beautiful.
They spent the evening around Stars Hollow, eating at Luke's, buying ice creams at Taylor's and watching a movie at Kirk's house. They liked their time together. Emily started liking Stars Hollow and her daughter life. Everybody in town loved Lorelai and she also loved her a lot. She needed to find the right way to make her understand her feelings.
"Lorelai, thank you for your help. Thank you for having spent all your time with me today. Thank you for having permitted me to know your lovely town". She said some time later, sat on the couch sipping a hot tea.
"Oh Mom…" Lorelai interrupted her.
"Lorelai please, you know it's not easy for me opening up with you. I'm not good with words when it comes of feelings…. I want only you know that I love you. I love you a lot. I always did." Emily said while a couple of tears burned in her eyes.
She stood up to go to Rory's bedroom, when Lorelai put her arms around her back and hugged her good and tight, pressing a soft kiss on her left cheek. Emily could see tears forming in her daughter's eyes too. They stood in that position for a long time. When they finally pulled away they looked at each other.
"I love you too, Mommy." Lorelai whispered.
Emily pulled her back in her arms and hugged her with all her love. She finally had her baby back.
The following morning it was still snowing out, Emily could see the snowfall trough the window. She went to the bathroom, took a quick warm shower and then wore her new dresses. She looked at her image on the mirror and shook her head lightly. She was wearing grey gymnastics pants, white sneakers and a very silly t-shirt with the brown stamp "At Luke's" just over her breast. She would have never worn something similar in Hartford, and she couldn't help to feel unease, but she knew her daughter would have liked her more this way, so she inhaled deeply and went out of the bedroom.
Like the day before mother and daughter went to Luke's for breakfast, both wearing the same silly t-shirt. Luke walked towards them and widened his eyes at the sight of the women's t-shirts.
"Where did you find those?" He asked, a light note of disgust in his voice.
"I thought you would have been proud to see your name over our breast. Many men would like to read their name here." Lorelai said touching the t-shirt just over her breast.
"Now I know from you inherited your weirdness." He responded rolling his eyes before giving to Emily a quick glance.
The two women laughed at Luke's reaction and looked at him disappearing in the kitchen. Emily was about to say something when she saw Richard staring at her through the diner's window. She felt her heart skipping a beat, her eyes glued on his. She stood up and walked directly towards the door, opening it quickly.
Richard looked at his wife, silently. All he could do was staring at her face, her eyes scrutinized his expression.
"What do you want? Why do you come here?" She asked after a long moment of tension.
"I want to apologize. I know you saw me with Priscilla in the pool house, but nothing happened, I swear. Not even a kiss." He said never breaking the eye-contact with his wife.
"Richard we are separated and if you want to enjoy your time having sex with your young secretary it's not a problem for me. By the way I had a date too that night, so it's not a problem." She responded fighting with the urge to tell him her true feelings.
"Did you have a date? With who?" He said astonished, he knew nothing about her date.
"It's not your business." She said firmly and then turned around to go back into the diner.
He grabbed her upper arm impulsively and forced her to face him. Bending down quickly he kissed her passionately, ignoring her complaints. It was a long, hungry kiss and when he finally let go of her she put her arms around his neck and looked at him breathlessly.
"Did he kiss you like this?" He asked challengingly.
"He didn't kiss me at all." She whispered still trying to catch her breath.
"Good." He breathed against her mouth.
"Good." She responded just before he covered her mouth with his again.
They kissed again, lovingly and tenderly this time. For the real first time in her life she didn't care about nothing but his body crushed against his, his hands caressing her cheeks while his lips kissed her gently.
"Let's go inside." He said and put his left arm around her waist, walking her into the diner.
Lorelai had seen the scene from her table and couldn't help to smile at her parents walking towards her hand in hand.
"Where are my parents?" She asked playfully looking at Emily and Richard sitting down on the chairs.
"What?" Both said puzzled.
"Emily Gilmore would have never let a man kiss her in the middle of a street. At least not in the way you let this man kiss you just a minute ago." Lorelai responded smiling.
"There are a lot of things you ignore about Emily and Richard Gilmore. Maybe it's time your parent's open up with you." Emily said looking straight in her daughter's eyes.
"I'd like the idea." Lorelai said and then covered her mother's hand with hers on the edge of the table.
Thanks to all for reading!! Please let a review.... I like knowing what you think about my stories....
