**I don't own DragonBall Z. This is gonna be my last story for a while cos school is starting soon and I will only be using the computer for schoolwork. This fic really works well if you add in sound effects. I have NOTHING against Goku, he just fits so perfectly as the victim of this fic**
Baked Beans
One day in the Son residence, Goku deiced he was hungry since he finished breakfast five minutes ago, Chi Chi was out with Gohan clothes shopping so Goku had no choice but to fix his own meal.
"Now what's left in the cupboard? Hmmm, what?! Baked beans?" Goku quickly searched the house for more food, nothing, so he had no choice but to eat the baked beans. In less than five minutes the baked beans were no more, but Goku was still hungry, so he went to Capsule Corp.
"Hey Vegeta, have you got anything to eat?"
"Of course not Kakarott, I ate it all"
=PRFFT=
"What was that? Ahhhgg! What's that funky smell?" Vegeta took out a gas mask,
"Kakarott, have you been eating those bloody baked beans again?"
"Well, um, er," Goku nodded, Vegeta produced a megaphone out of thin air,
"Clear the area people! Kakarott has been eating baked beans!"
Sirens went off, shops closed down and soon everyone in the whole of Japan were wearing gas masks. Goku was blushing like heck,
"Vegeta, I only had baked beans once before,"
"Yeah, and we nearly all died," replied Vegeta, his voice muffled because of the gas mask,
=PRFFT=
"There goes the back of your pants Kakarott."
Goku was becoming redder by the minute,
=PRFFT=
The birds fell out of the sky,
"Kami, I can smell it through the gas mask! How many tins do you eat Kakarott? Seventy?"
=PRFFT=
"Only"
=PRFFT=
"The"
=PRFFT=
"One"
=PRFFT=
"Can"
=PRFFT=
By now Vegeta had his own oxygen tank, all the plants and animals in a fifty mile radius were dead and all the water in Japan had evaporated,
"You gotta help me Vegeta," begged Goku
"Umm, no"
"Please"
"No"
"I'll be your friend"
"No"
=PRFFT=
*gag**gag* "OK Kakarott, I'll help," *gag**gag*
"Yay!!!"
=PRRRRRFFT=
"Opps"
***
"Okay Kakarott, first we have to find out how bad your farts are, now I am going to light up this match and stand behind you,"
"Okay Vegeta"
Vegeta took his place behind Goku, he wasn't really trying to find out how bad Goku's farts were, he was trying to do what the people on TV did, the fart+fire thing. Goku let off a big one, a HUGE, I mean HUGE, fireball barreled across the room disendergrating all the furniture to dust,
"Yessss! It worked!"
"What worked Vegeta?"
"Uhh, nothing Kakarott, now according to my calculations you have VERY feisty farts."
"Hey, cool, I think,"
=PRFFT=
"I think you need new pants Kakarott," pointed out Vegeta,
"Wha? Oh, hee hee," Vegeta rolled his eyes and tossed Goku a pair of pants that belonged to Dr. Briefs.
"Now, what other things do we need to find out about your farts Kakarott?"
"Uhh, how to stop them?" suggested Goku
"Yes, of course"
=PRFFT=
"Now Kakarott, I want you to play this recorder,"
"Why?" asked Goku
"Just do it" snarled Vegeta
Goku stuck the recorder in his mouth as far as he could, blew, then choked, Vegeta laughed his ass off as Goku staggered around the room with a recorder stuck down his throat.
=PRFFT=
"Hey Vegeta, where are you going? You haven't cured me yet," shouted Goku
"I am going on an expedition to top all expeditions, one that has plagued man and Saiyajin kind for centuries." Replied Vegeta,
"Are you going to the corner store?"
"….Yes"
"Can I come?" asked Goku
"I don't babysit" snorted Vegeta
Goku strained,
"NO!!! Fine you can come" yelled Vegeta
"Yesss! I can say 'are we there yet'" said Goku jumping around in a lunatic fashion,
Vegeta just went to the nearest post and banged his head on it.
=PRFFT=
"So what are we here for Vegeta?" asked Goku,
"We need to find something to cure you of those farts, before you kill the entire human race, NOT that I care," answered Vegeta,
"Yeah, I'm sure," replied Goku grinning his trademark grin,
"Shut up Kakarott,"
=PRFFT=
**In the Corner store**
"Vegeta! Look!"
"What is it Kakarott?"
"I don't know, but the guy looks exactly like me, does the same things as me and even has a friend that looks like you!"
Vegeta looked at the mirror, then at Goku he could tell that Goku was having a kick watching his 'twin'.
"Kakarott, sit," Vegeta instructed, Goku sat,
"Stay…Good, now I 'm going to the store over there, you can stay here and play with your friend."
Goku nodded and Vegeta walked away,
"Kami, what type of Siaya Jin is that baka Kakarott."
Meanwhile Goku is having a lot of fun with well, himself,
"Hey what is your name, I'm Son Goku! So are too? Cool!….."
Well you get the idea…
**On a mountain**
Tein has gathered all of the Earth's Seven Star DragonBalls,
"Oh, Mighty Eternal Dragon Shenlong! Come forth to grant my wish!"
The sky darkened and the wind blew…
"I am the Mighty Eternal Dragon Shenlong, I will grant you one wish that does not exceed my power" he stated
"I wish," Tein said, "To have Vegeta's hair!"
The Dragon's eyes glowed red,
"Your wish has been granted."
With that the Dragon disappeared and the DragonBalls flew in different directions. And there is Tein, grinning, sporting Vegeta's hair on his head…..
**At the store**
Vegeta felt his head go light, a weird feeling that something was wrong came over him, slowly he put his hand on his head…
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
**In Australia**
"Chi, do you hear something?" asked Kyan (me)
"Nuh, must be in you head,"
"OK then" Then they both returned to drawing pictures of junk.
**Back at the store**
"AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
dogs howled, glass cracked, alarms went off, Goku stopped banging his head on the mirror.
"Umm, Vegeta is there something wrong?" asked Goku
"Look at me Kakarott, is there something wrong?!?!?!"
"You got new clothes?"
"YOU BAKA KAKAROTT!! MY @^#$*^( HAIR IS @&*%* MISSING! HOW COULD YOU %^#*^%* MISS THAT YOU $&^*%(&^ KAKROTT!!!"
"Oh…So you are angry then?"
Vegeta pushed passed Goku and went in search for his hair.
**Master Roshi's house**
"Wow Tein! Neat hair!" exclaimed Choutzu excitedly,
"Isn't it?" replied Tein posing like a supermodel.
"Is it heavy?"
"Well put it this way, at least I don't have to train in Gravity Chambers anymore!"
They laughed, just then Vegeta burst in,
"Give me back my HAIR!!!!!!!" he shouted
"NOOOO!!!!!"
"Give it BACK"
"Get lost"
"Pull hair, pull hair" (Vegeta pulled "Tein's" hair)
"Scratch, scratch," (Tein is scratching Vegeta)
"Bitch!"
"Slut!"
What about Goku? You are asking, well he went to the nearest mirror and started talking to his new 'friend'…
"GIVE ME BACK MY HAIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
**Back in Australia**
"Chi, are you sure you don't hear anything?"
"Kyan, sure I'm sure,"
"K then,"
And Kyan went back to quickly doing his homework that he should have done the night before.
**At Roshi's**
Vegeta had surpassed the level of Super Siayan 19, his hair color was well, kind light purple and his eyes where dark blue/purple.
"AHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My head!!!!!!"
Tein's hair was also light purple and with the energy coursing though it, the hair was burning Tein's head,
"EEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Tein was squealing like a girl,
"Take it back! Take it back! I wanna be bald!!!!"
"YOU BETTER!!!!!!!!!!BAKA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
**Australia**
Kyan heard it again, he looked around, at Chi, shook his head and continued the drawing he had started.
**Roshi's**
Tein was crying like a baby, Choutzu was a crisp, Vegeta had passed out from the amount of power he gathered and Goku was well, talking to himself…
"What!? You're a Saiya Jin as well?!?! Cool! Lets spar!"
Goku aimed a punch at himself, punched and broke the mirror,
"Wow, one hit and he KO'ed, weird…"
Goku looked around,
"Wow!! We're at Master Roshi's! Hey! Tein's got hair and Vegeta has no hair! Cool! Fried Choutzu! But 'sigh' I wanna play with my friend…."
**Capsule Corp.**
Vegeta woke up, he put his hand to his head to his head, still bald. Vegeta was still too weak to blast the place in the next dimension so he just laid in bed. After a while, he spotted Goku who was talking to the mirror,
"Kakarott, what are you doing?" he snapped.
Goku turned his head slowly, his face was blank and his eyes were glazed over,
"Why hello Vegeta," he said in a totally expressionless voice," How are you feeling?" A scary smile came over Goku's face. Nearly dead or not nearly dead, Goku was freaking the hell out of Vegeta.
**In the lab**
"OK, now here's the Dragon Radar and some supplies. The spaceship is ready for you to go to Namek to get those DragonBalls."
"OK, thanks Bulma," Gohan said taking the stuff,
"Now Gohan, you gotta be careful and when you get back you are going to have to catch up on all the work you have missed…"
"OK, OK Chi Chi," said Bulma waving her hand, "Don't forget the wish Gohan. To have Vegeta his normal hair back. Vegeta doesn't look so hot without his hair…"
Gohan nodded and went inside the spaceship,
"Bye bye Gohan! I love you!" Chi Chi shouted, "And don't forget to revise you 1265 time tables!!"
"Yes mum! Bye!"
The spaceship blasted off.
**Five days later**
The Namek Dragon was in the sky,
"You get three wishes that do not exceed my power," he said,
"I wish that Vegeta of earth would get his normal hair back," a little green dude said in Namekin. The Dragons' eyes glowed red,
"Your wish is granted, Vegeta of earth has his normal hair back."
**On earth**
Vegeta was lying in bed and Bulma was reading a science book besides his bed, suddenly Vegeta felt his head become heavier. He put his hand on his head and felt…HAIR!!
"Oh Vegeta! Your hair is back!"
"Of course it is you baka," Vegeta replied smirking.
With that Bulma jumped on him and they well, umm, yeah, you know……
**Namek**
"Hurry up and make your second wish!"
"Gohan, what is your second wish?" asked the Namek,
"Ummm, how about to be wished back to Capsule Corp.??"
"OK. I wish that Gohan will go back to Capsule Corp. of earth," shouted the Namek in Namekin.
Gohan glowed for an instant and disappeared.
**CC**
Gohan landed in the fishpond, he jumped up, run to the kitchen and emptied all things related to food in there, including the plastic vegetables and fruit.
**Namek**
"You have one wish left, hurry up,"
"I wish to be a 20 year old human female," said the Namek,
The Dragon's eyes glowed red and he disappeared sending the large boulders everywhere across the planet. The ex-Namek then grinned and stuck her head down her shirt.
Well everything is back to normal Vegeta has his hair back, Tein is bald again, Choutzu is back at King Kai's and Goku, well, Goku is playing with himself…..
So I guess it's
~ Fine ~
**Whew, finished. No sequel to this one. Anyways got to go and draw junk again! Later pplz, don't forget to R&R. In case you're wondering, Goku lost his farts.**
