"We have compiled a list of Blaine's faults for your perusal," Wesley informed Kurt as he gingerly lowered himself into the chair opposite the somewhat bewildered soprano.

"It's a comprehensive guide to his failings," David added helpfully as he pushed the list across the table, watching as it skidded to a halt mere millimetres from the other's hand.

Kurt blinked and then frowned slightly, "and why," he raised an elegant brow, "would you do this?"

"Standard procedure," Wesley answered easily.

"We need to make sure you know what you're getting yourself into," David explained with a cryptic sideways glance at Wes.

Kurt eyed the bold print, size 42 title, 'Wesley & David's comprehensive guide to the faults and failings of Blaine Anderson'

"Uh huh," he remarked slowly, "and what is it, exactly, that I'm getting myself into?"

"If you would read the document..." Wes suggested, extending a hand to tap the aforementioned item lightly.

"I mean," Kurt clarified, brow creasing, "why would you think I'd need such a...guide?"

Wesley sighed and opened his mouth to respond, then closed it with an audible snap as David beat him to the punch.

"You want to date Blaine, right?" He shot an apologetic glance at Wes who folded his arms in response.

"No!"Kurt denied instinctively, "I mean yes! Well, not really no..." he floundered under the guardedly amused gazes.

"...so," David cut across his panicked babble, "knowing Blaine and his...quirks, as we do, Wesley and I realised the importance of such a guide if any relationship between the two of you were to succeed."

"But why..?" Kurt flicked his eyes back down to the list in astonishment as he scrambled to understand the true meaning behind the disinterest conveyed by the formality of the delivery.

"We have a vested interest in the success of such an endeavour," Wes leaned forward slightly and pushed the paper just a little closer to Kurt, his message clear.

"Oh," Kurt felt a smile worm its way onto his face as a warm feeling flooded his chest. In their own weird and eccentric way, Wes and David were essentially telling him that they approved of him, that they liked him, even.

But what did it matter? It wasn't as if Blaine wanted to date him.

"Is something the matter?" Wes stifled an irritated sigh at the glazed look in Kurt's eyes. All that work compiling an incredibly detailed list and the boy wouldn't even read it.

"...oh sorry," Kurt refocused and raised his head to meet Wes's eyes, "I'm fine. Listen, thanks for the list but I really don't think it's-"

"Just read it," David insisted.

What the hell.

"...okay," Kurt conceded and picked the list up, skimming his thumb along the side to flip the title page over. His eyes fell immediately on the first line.

'For Kurt Hummel's eyes ONLY. If anyone other than the aforementioned is found bearing this paper on their person, immediate and unrestricted action WILL be undertaken in order to retrieve said paper wherein the illegal bearer will be subjected to extreme and unmitigated punishment, having surrendered all basic human rights upon the illegitimate possession of this important document.

Kurt blinked and worked hard to stifle the burst of laughter that threatened to overwhelm him. Sometimes he really, really, wondered about Wes and David. Often, he felt as if the boring, formal, prep-school boy persona was simply an act, and that both were hiding extremely mischievous, and humorous, personalities beneath their stern exteriors. He flicked his eyes up to see them watching him, blatant curiosity running rampant across their usually tightly controlled expressions.

He read further.

'The following reads, in list format, as a compilation of Blaine Anderson's most grating faults and failings in no particular order.'

In no particular order? How unlike them...

'Item #1: Sings Disney in the shower. Detailed breakdown: Subject, upon entering the shower, bursts into loud, uncontrolled, renditions of various obscure and/or well known Disney songs with unabashed usage of falsetto. Subject also displays a blatant disregard for the sanity and health of his roommate's ear drums when said disturbances occur.'

Kurt grinned, Blaine sung Disney in the shower? How absolutely, endearingly...cute.

"Wesley, I do believe he's grinning." David announced, slightly affronted.

"This, sir, is no laughing matter." Wes informed Kurt sternly, "I thank you to show our hard work the proper respect and solemnity it deserves."

"Of course," Kurt stifled his grin, schooling his features into neutrality, "forgive me a moment's digression."

Good lord, he was learning to talk like them.

"Accepted," Wesley nodded, "do read on."

'Item #2: Displays indifference towards the proper usage of numerous items of furniture. Detailed breakdown: Subject consistently refuses to adhere to the fixed-functionality bias, insisting upon treating certain objects of furniture in unacceptable ways. Subject typically stores various items of clothing under his bed and/or is content to use the floor as his own personal hamper. Potential roommates and/or partners are advised to beware of hazardous articles. Subject is known also to misplace his hair-gel appallingly frequently, and it is advisable to prepare oneself for the frantic search typically taking place every Sunday, Wednesday and Friday.'

This time Kurt simply couldn't contain his laughter at the scene he envisaged. Blaine, ridiculously cute in some kind of form-fitting sweater, frantically searching the room for his mislaid hair-gel, with unkempt curls bouncing adorably around his face, tripping unceremoniously on various piles of clothing strewn haphazardly around the room...gosh he wished it was real...and that he had a camera.

Maybe it was...

"Is this true?" He asked Wes eagerly.

"Of course," Wes answered, affronted, "do you doubt our integrity?"

"No, no, not at all," Kurt waved the accusation away hurriedly, "it's just so...unbelievably cute."

"Cute?" David grimaced, appalled, "Please enlighten me as to what one would find 'cute' about such blatantly aggravating flaws?"

"Oh come on guys," Kurt grinned, "you're not serious?"

Apparently, they were.

"You mock us," Wes accused and made as if to snatch the list from Kurt's hands.

"No!' Kurt clutched it possessively, "It's great, really."

"Blaine," David hissed before straightening and flashing a bright smile, "Blaine!" he said, louder, "we were just having an amicable lunch with Kurt, here."

"You were, were you?" Blaine, somewhere behind Kurt, sounded slightly suspicious. Kurt surreptitiously stuffed the paper into his satchel and turned slightly till Blaine's visage appeared in his peripherals.

"Just having a good old chat," Kurt chuckled nervously.

"...uh huh," Blaine slid into the seat beside him, eyebrows raised, "exchanging...stationary, were we?"

"Kurt asked me to look at his Spanish paper," Wesley countered smoothly.

"Wes, you don't take Spanish," Blaine pointed out, more than a little suspicious as he watched Kurt squirm.

"Not anymore," David broke in, "but you used to, didn't you Wes?"

"Yes, junior year." Wes agreed.

Blaine narrowed his eyes as they roamed over his friend's innocent faces. He just knew they were up to something. The question was what, and how it involved Kurt.