Experimentation and Self-Discovery

"Fuck! Makoto, ow, ow, stop for a second."

When he woke up this morning, Rin Matsuoka did not expect to end up in bed with a childhood friend. If someone had asked him which of his childhood friends he was most likely to end up in bed with, Makoto would not have been his answer. His answer would most likely have been a fist to the hypothetical inquirer's jaw. You see, this morning, Rin Matsuoka probably would have claimed that he was straight.

But here he is.

"You need to relax," Makoto says. "I can't – "

"How the fuck am I supposed to relax? Do you have a clue what you're doing down there?" Rin hisses.

"I haven't…."

"You're fucking kidding me."

"… done this before."

Rin groans and closes his eyes and tries to forget that he's bare-ass naked with his legs spread in front of Makoto. When that fails, he switches to hoping he'll spontaneously combust.

"I'm sorry," Makoto stammers. "I'm sorry, I don't want to hurt you, I – "

"Where's the – do you even have lube?" Rin asks, forearm covering his eyes. Makoto's silence answers the question. "Go buy lube."

"But – "

"If you try using spit I will rip your balls off."

Makoto squeaks (how the hell does a guy that size squeak, Rin wonders) and scoots off of the bed, failing to extricate himself entirely from Rin's legs. Rin hits the floor hard.

"Shit! Goddammit Makoto, you'll be lucky if I'm here when you get back," Rin growls, but Makoto's scared-sorry-sad face completely disarms him. "Just go to the drugstore, I'll stay," he huffs, and Makoto smiles sheepishly and departs after pulling on clothes.

Rin still isn't sure how this arrangement of him on the bottom came about. Especially because now he's seen Makoto naked and Makoto's kind of huge. He guesses he's curious, but that raises a whole new plethora of questions, like "wasn't I straight this morning?" and things of that nature. Rin has never done a whole lot of thinking on the logistics of fucking a guy, but him taking it is not how those stray thoughts about Haruka went.

He stretches out on Makoto's bed and finds himself surprisingly comfortable. A little too comfortable. By the time Makoto edges back into the room, holding a small bottle and blushing brilliantly, Rin has passed out on his pillow.

"Rin," Makoto whispers. "Rin, I'm back."

"'Bout fuckin' time," Rin mumbles into the pillow before rolling over, and Makoto feels a sudden rush at the view of Rin's lithe body stretched out on his sheets. He looks good. Strong. Undeniably gorgeous, like he's always been, like Makoto never let himself think before.

Makoto drops the bottle on the bed and descends on Rin, kissing him hard as Rin fumbles with Makoto's shirt buttons. No more time for contemplation, not with Makoto's hands running all over his body, not with Makoto's breath hot against his skin.

Rin lets out a breathy moan when Makoto accidentally presses down on his hipbone, and he orders him to do it again despite the blush creeping over his face.

Makoto's fingers trail downward and wrap around Rin's hardening cock. He gives a few tentative strokes as Rin's breathing quickens.

"Try it again," Rin says. "And don't be stingy with that stuff," he adds as Makoto starts to squeeze the lube onto his fingers. Makoto nods, blushing furiously, and Rin averts his eyes.

"Cold!" One could call the noise Rin just made a yelp. Makoto almost laughs at the sheer awkwardness of the whole thing. Isn't sex supposed to be a little more streamlined than this?

"Rin – "

"Don't stop, you idiot, it's just – ow, fuck, fuck, yeah, stop, you're definitely doing something wrong."

Makoto's eyebrows furrow. This is not going as planned.

"I think it's because you're so tense," he says slowly. "I can't get anything – "

"Oh no, why the fuck would I be tense, it's not like I'm having my first homo experience with – "

"You haven't done this before either?"

Rin freezes.

"Um. No."

Makoto's face looks like he isn't sure what expression to use. It flits between a reassuring smile, abject terror, and oh-god-what-now.

"Just… I don't know, just use more lube and get one in me and we'll see where it goes from there," Rin mutters. He feels like he should be rethinking this whole experience, but for some reason he's not.

Rin groans and shivers, trying not to complain as Makoto's finger enters him.

"Two," Rin says after a minute or so.

"Won't that hurt?"

"Yes, Makoto, it's going to hurt like a bitch, but I want to get somewhere tonight and you need to loosen me the fuck up or I'm going to break in half."

Makoto felt a lot more confident when he wasn't hurting Rin. He doesn't want to hurt Rin. Honestly, at this point he'd be pretty content with handjobs or something despite how much he wants more, but Rin seems pretty hell-bent on the sex issue for some reason.

"Ah…" Rin hisses, the second finger making its way in. "Now move," he orders tersely. "Fuck, not that fast. There, better, that's – holy shit!"

"What, what, did I hurt – "

"No, keep going, please," Rin breathes, and Makoto's fingers pick up the pace, sliding in and out of him, and now it feels pretty good, if not particularly skillful. Rin lets out a couple of low moans.

Makoto leans forward, his fingers still working, and he kisses Rin softly and Rin doesn't so much respond as retaliate, shoving his tongue past Makoto's teeth and burying his hands in Makoto's hair.

"I want you," Rin whispers when Makoto pulls away for a split second. "I think I'm ready."

"You're still pretty tight. I don't want to hurt you," Makoto says, kissing a line down Rin's neck.

"Come on, Makoto, I'm not some delicate teenage girl, I'm not going to fall apart. Don't you want me?" He quickens his strokes of Makoto's hard cock, trying to imagine the feeling of it in him.

Makoto bites his lip and nods. Rin moves his hand and places it at Makoto's shoulder.

"I've got a condom in my wallet, give me my pants for a second."

"I'm a vir – I don't have anything, you know." Makoto almost sounds a little offended.

"Shut up and put on the rubber, if you come in me I'll have to kill you."

Makoto shakes his head and takes the little packet from Rin. Slowly, his fingers slip out of Rin and he positions his cock.

"Can I – ?"

"Put it in, Makoto, that's kind of the point of this whole thing," Rin spits.

Slowly, Makoto pushes in, fighting the urge to just thrust in all at once and fuck Rin senseless once he realizes that goddamn, this feels glorious. Rin is hot and tight, twitching and squeezing Makoto, and it takes all of his self-control to stop when Rin sort of whimpers.

Rin's eyes are shut, his chest heaving, his arms wrapped around Makoto's neck.

"Stop. Stop, it hurts," he pants. "No, don't take it out. Give me a minute."

Makoto isn't sure how long he'll be able to hold himself still in this position – his cock buried in Rin's body, Rin's legs wrapped around his waist – without losing his damn mind.

"God, Rin," he whispers, "you're so beautiful. I want you so bad."

"I'm not… a girl, Makoto," Rin says. "Move." Makoto tries an easy thrust that gets a little too enthusiastic on the return. "Ahh! Slower, please. Fuck, you're huge. I'm topping next time."

Makoto blushes a little bit at the "next time". So this isn't a one-time thing? This isn't just Rin trying something new and then throwing him away?

Rin realizes what he just said and turns bright pink.

"Focus, Makoto," he tries to growl and it turns into a moan as Makoto shifts and does something right. "Fuck."

"Was that good?"

"Yes, Makoto, move!"

Makoto thrusts again, harder this time, and he leans down to kiss Rin while he picks up the pace. Rin's breathy moans and Makoto's louder ones mix with the slap of skin on skin.

"Fuck, you feel so good," Makoto finds himself growling in Rin's ear. "You want me bad, don't you?"

If Rin currently had the presence of mind to contemplate, he would wonder where the hell this rough, dominant streak came from. He doesn't, so all he's aware of is that he really fucking likes it. He moans something that might have words in it, and Makoto picks up again, slamming into Rin at a frantic pace that has Rin crying out with every thrust.

Makoto comes first – lasts long enough, considering his inexperience – but his hand on Rin's cock gets Rin off pretty quickly after that. For a minute or so they just lie there, both of them breathing hard, Rin grinning like a lunatic and Makoto smiling his classic Makoto smile.

"Hey Makoto?" Rin asks breathlessly.

"Yeah?"

"Remember when I said I thought I might like you?"

"Two hours ago at the pool? Yeah."

"I figured it out."

End